Asleep
by Gone2GroundEX
Summary: FE13 Self-Insert. Woke up underwater with no clue how I got here. I was never this good at fighting. I was never this good at anything. Things have changed, and not for the better - stupid Auto-Balancing. One last question: Who is the Old Man?
1. Prologue (Cam Prologue)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and swearing in German/French**

**Prologue- Midnight**

Cold. Colddarkcold.

Augh. Wet, too?

Cold dark wet. Wonderful.

Well. Get up. Open eyes. Breathe-GAH!

No! Don't breathe! Water! Breathing bad right now!

up. Where's up. Go up. Go up go up go up goup-

Splash. I'm up. Eyes open. Breathe.

Shore, Where's the shore, where's the bloody shore?

There. There's the shore. Right. Still dark. Priorities.

Get.

To.

The.

Shore.

Swim, you fool.

Okay. Okay, shore is good. Okay. Augh, dammit, my wallet's going to be ruined. Shite! Laptop!

Shite! 3DS! Dammit, that was the Awakening bundle! I was hoping to log some more street-pass teams to annihilate.

Wait.

Waitwaitwait.

These aren't my clothes. That's not my bag. Damn, is it still even my face? Good, water.

Okay, well, I'm still a guy, that's good to know. Hrm, face is still kinda square, nose is still squint...eyes are still grey...hair is still reddish-brown and a dirty mess..hands are covered in sand...sand? Am I on a beach?

...

There aren't any nice beaches anywhere near my house. Okay. Okay okay. Breathe. Calm down. Shivering. Hypothermia? Deal with other problems later. Get warm. Take order of supplies. What do I have?  
Bag. Soaking wet bag. Looks like bedroll, spare clothes and...a smaller bag. With coins.

What.  
Flint and steel. Okay. Can build fire. Rope. Okay. Can build shelter.

Okay. Right. What else? Clothes I'm wearing should be fine. What's on my back?

Shield. Huh.

Sword. Huh.

Okay, I have tools at least. Get-get to the forest. Is there a forest? Yes. Over there.

Forest.

Get to forest. Build shelter. Get some sleep. Figure this out later.

* * *

Log Entry #1:

Found a book and pencil. Waterproofed for some reason. Don't know why.  
I still don't know where I am or how I got this gear. Maybe I got mugged? But why? Why would you mug someone and give them a sword and a fortune in solid gold coins?

Find a town. Get information.

Figure out where I am.

Organize your bloody thoughts, Cameron. Get your act together.

* * *

Okay, well, that was embarrassing. Not had a mind-melt like that since I was like, five or something. Yeah. I'm normally better structured than that. I think I saw a town over there. No roads (Well, tarmac anyway), which is troubling. This is starting to sound like a bad fanfic.

...

Speaking of, when the hell was my hand-eye this good? I'm dyspraxic for god's sakes, I shouldn't be able to flip a coin over in my hand without dropping it. I was never this fit, I'm a frigging nerd for crying out loud. There is something inherently wrong here.

Ah, there's the village. Right. Find a pub or something. Follow traditional fantasy tropes. Maybe I'm stuck in some weird-ass dream thanks to D&D withdrawal. Stupid Alex not planning his dungeon crawl fast enough...

"Hail, traveller!"

How to continue. Possibilities, possibilities.

Raise hand in response. Smile.

"Hail, my friend. I apologize, but I seem to have lost my way. Where exactly am I?"

Huh. That's odd. She looks like the generic female villager portrait from Awakening. Interesting-oh. Oh god no.

"You're in Archet, sir!"

...isn't that a village from Lord of the Rings?

"Apologies. What's the nearest major city?"

"That'd be Ylisstol, to the north, sir!"

...

...

...

Oh.

Oh god no.

Crap.

Keep mask up. Don't panic. Don't panic. Don't panic-

"Sir, are you alright? You look a little peaky-"

"I'm fine, thank you. Must have wandered further off course than anticipated. Hmm."

Crap.

CRAP.

"...I don't suppose you could tell me where I could find room and board? I need some time to gather my thoughts."  
"It's down that way, sir. Look for the Royal Ring."  
"Thank you. Have a nice day."  
Smile pleasantly. Get smiled at back. Walk off waving.

...okay. Inside the inn. Swallow nervously. Packed full. Dangerous men. Crap. This isn't good. Inn-keeper. Well-kept man, portly. Brown hair.  
"Evening, young master! What'll it be?"

"A room for the night, please. A meal, too, if it is possible."  
"Alright, sir. That'll be one gold for the room and meal together."  
Oh, wow. Well, the Fire Emblem economy makes more sense now. 480gp for a sword is more logical if a meal and bed is only 1gp.

"Here you are, sir. Thank you."  
Wander off. Find table. Sigh. Write another log while waiting.

* * *

Log Entry #2:

Okay, my dyspraxia is definitely gone. That's one good thing to come out of this mess. My handwriting's improved tenfold. Not to mention that having a hand-eye co-ordination problem would be the world's most hampering weaksauce weakness in a frigging medieval world.

Damn, Ylisse? I'm in Ylisse? How the hell did that happen?

I remember playing chess with Eugene, the old man across the road, and then I wake up underwater ON THE COAST OF A FICTIONAL CONTINENT?!

Right. Okay.

I am not in Fire Emblem Awakening.

I am in a _bad fanfic_.

Due to the laws of bad Self-Inserts, I have to beat the game in order to get out. Okay.

Beating the game means meeting up with either Chrom and the shepherds, or as an alternate plan Lucina.

Huh, that'd be interesting actually. See what she was doing for three years before joining your party – no. Bad idea. I don't even know if she's come through ye

* * *

Shattering glass. Screams. Smell. Burning.

I can smell burning.

The burly men in the corner grin and stand up, dropping axes to their hands. Well, wonderful. I guess this might be the village that Chrom saves at the opening of the game.

Which would make these buggers bandits.  
"Hey, boy! You look like a scrapper. Care to join us? We pay well..."  
The one who talked showed teeth. Well.

I think there's only one appropriate response to that question, isn't there?

Smile.

Stand up.

Nod.

FLIP TABLE.  
Food and candles scattered everywhere, distracting the three bandits for a few seconds. My hands wrench my shield and sword from my back, and-

wait.

When the hell did I learn to use a shield and sword? Plot convenience?

OH GOD AXE

Think later, avoid dying NOW

Bring up the shield to block the falling axe. Push forward with the shield to knock the axe back and push target off-balance. Use momentum to spin.

Gut opponent with sword.

One bandit fell to the ground, clutching his belly. Straighten up.

"Well, when I make money I prefer there to be places left to spend it." I said cheerfully. The two remaining bandits charged forwards, but they were dispatched in short enough order. Evidently don't know how to fight at all, but neither did I until...not sure when. Still know more than they do.

Right.

Civilians. Deal with this.

"Get to the church." I barked. "You can bar the doors and they can't burn it down. I'll buy some time."

They just stood there dumbfounded.

Good god, I have had a bad day. I have ended up in another world, killed three men, and acquired a bunch of skills that I didn't have earlier.

I do not need shell-shocked civilians making it worse.

"GET A BLOODY MOVE ON!"  
Okay, louder than necessary, but it got the point across as they all scattered out the door.

Church is across the street. Exit door.

...

Huh. That's more enemies than there are on normal.

Dear god, please let this not be Lunatic or Lunatic+.

I am _begging you here_. Cut me one break. ONE. BREAK.

Well, that's a fireball. I'll take that as a no then?

OH GOD

Damn, that hurts. Okay. Get back up. Get up. GETUPGETUPGETUP.

Right. Okay.

Minor burns on sword arm. Right cheek feels scorched. Breathing difficult.

Be. More. Careful.

Oh god, myrmidon.

Block with shield, push away-no. Wait.

Dammit, he just pirouetted and converted his momentum into another slash. Parry. Step back. Raise shield, ready sword for thrusting.

"So, what, you guys get off on killing innocent people? Such big strong men you are."

...on second thoughts, snarky comebacks may not have been the best idea here. The other myrmidon and the leader are coming now too.

Crap.

That means that Chrom, Frederick and hopefully Robin are showing up all the way over there. Just frigging wonderful. Let's hope that-SWORD!  
Block. Thrust. Watch myrmidon dodge. Other myrmidon. Dodge the swing, try to hit him while he's off-guard. Myrmidon parries.

Wow, just how low is my Skill score? What do these guys have, like, eight? Not that great...

Oh god, it's their leader. Okay. Catch his blow on the shield-OH GOD!

Shield destroyed. Arm broken. Pain.

Painhotpain.

Agh

Pain.

Keel over, vomit. Jesus wept. Pain. So...much...pain...

"Heh, not so much big talk now, are you?"

Axe coming. Step aside.

He's innacurate. I can do this-OH GOD FAST.

Okay. I can – MYRMIDON!

Other myrmidon!

MAAAAGE!

Dammit. Dammit. Outnumbered. That fireball hit my back, and my legs are nicked. This was a stupid plan. Stupid, stupid plan. I must have caught that last three off guard. What the hell was I thinking?

...

I am about to die. Huh. Strangely zen actually.

Of course, now the powers-that-be decide to intervene in the form of lightning storm to the leader's face. Well, at least that mean's I'm not the replacement Robin. That would make no sense whatsoever, I mean Robin's backstory is fairly important-

Oh god, Myrmidon-impaled. Well. I have blood on my face now. Oooh, pretty lance tip, Frederick. That would mean-Ah, there's Falchion, right on time. That's the second Myrmidon down, and – yes, yes, Chrom gets the mage too. Showoff.

Well, the boss is back up.

"Fools! Who dares defy the mighty Garrick?!"  
Oh, that's his name!

Huh, my arm feels all tingly. That's odd-OH GOD THE PAIN.

"Oh, sorry!"

Dammit, Lissa, why don't you break it again-OH HEY it's set. Huh. So the excruciating pain is the bones being put back into place. Awesome.

"Don't...worry about it."

Grit teeth. Pain. Damn. Must not appear weak. One chance to get recruited.

Oh hey, they missed a bandit.

"Move!"  
Grab little blonde girl. Throw out of the way. Get hit again ow ow ow. Okay, large cut on soldier. Collarbone broken. Ow.

Heh, this one's slow. Slash. One cut throat. Problem solved. Blood everywhere, again...

"Are you all right?" I asked Lissa, finally feeling more organized again. Adrenaline must do that to you.

"Are you kidding? That was AWESOME!" She gushed. A bit of an overreaction, sure, but nice to have all the same.

"...I don't know if you've noticed, but I am bleeding yet again, so a little haste with the healing would be appreciated...?" I suggested weakly.

Well that's an interesting spectrum of colours for your face to go through, Lissa.

"Right, sorry."  
So we both stood there embarrassed for a few seconds while she stitched my shoulder back together. Fun. At least the others seemed to have finished the convos with generic villager people.

"Sir?"

Oh hey barkeep. What do you want.

"Yes?"

"Sir, you were...very brave. Maybe a little stupid, but brave." He admitted. "We don't have much in the ways of reward, but you are always welcome back here."

I spent a few seconds looking pointedly at the blazing houses.

"Are you certain there will still be a 'here' to come back to, good man?"

Oh god, I can't do this middle-age-y dialogue for much longer, but its polite at least.

"We're tough around these parts. We'll manage." He grinned. "Besides, I didn't like the old inn anyway. I mean, Royal Ring? Who calls something that?"

Well, there's a smile now. Bit of laughter, makes my lungs hurt though. "I'll say."

"Yeah, we'll just call it something else now. What's your name, sir?"

I just saw Chrom, Robin and Frederick wander over. "Name it after them, not me. I'd just be an unpleasant stain on the floor if they hadn't shown up."

And just like that, the hero worship was gone. Sighing, I wandered over to the nearby canal and rubbed the soot off of my face. A hand clenched around my shoulder, tightening in... a slightly painful way. Hello, Frederick the Wary.

"I appreciate you helping the villagers."

Oh god, that voice is deeper than it was in the game. Although that might be intimidation working for him.

"Peace, Frederick. That innkeeper said he saved their lives."

"At great physical pain, I assure you." I grinned, turning to meet them. Good impressions Cam, good impressions. "I'm Cameron, a wandering...adventurer, I guess."

Go go go D&D obsession!

"...adventurer?" The man whom I assume is Robin asked. Well, what do we have here. Yup, default male avatar. Looks like he didn't even bother to draw his sword, not surprised. Magic is OP in this game.

"Yeah, you know. Wander the world, taking on odd jobs, seeing the sights, fighting off the forces of evil...okay, that last one only got added to the list today." I smirked. "Still, money's been a bit tight recently. If you lot are the shepherds, maybe you could afford to take on an extra hand?"

There was a pause as Frederick puffed himself up.

"We do not take any common soldier off the street-"

"He risked his life for civilians, Frederick. That's enough for me to trust him." Chrom said, cutting Frederick off again. "Besides, we are running low on men. There's only you, me, Lissa, Vaike, Miriel, Sully, Stahl, Mariabel and...uh..."

"Kellam, Captain."

Oh, Kellam. I'm so sorry for you.

"Right, Kellam. Another able sword wouldn't be amiss, would it?"

Frederick gave up, grumbling to himself. HYES! I AM IN!

New goal unlocked: Don't die.

"Excellent! Erm, who are you?"

Frederick sighed. Chrom and Robin smirked, and Lissa giggled. Oh god, that giggle is going to drive me insane isn't it?

"I'm Chrom, commander of the shephards." Chrom said. "This is Sir Frederick, second-in-command, my sister Lissa, and our other new recruit, Robin."  
Robin gave a cheery wave. Oh god, let's gogogo LucinaxRobin OTP.

Focus. Focus. No shipping. Bad Cameron. Let love happen. Don't min-max skills IRL, that would be bad. Seriously.

...okay.

"Well then." I grinned. "Guess we've got a long walk to go, huh?"

Lissa looked at me hopefully. "Unless you're still hurt and need to rest enjoying good hospitality...?"  
"Nope, you did a pretty good job stitching me back together. I'll just grab my things and then we can leave."

Lissa grumbled to herself about how she should have messed up my collarbone earlier as I walked back to the tavern to pick up my bag. Huh, empty. I wonder why-

"You're in this world for two days and you already break something?"  
...Eugene?

I turned quickly, and saw an old man standing stooped in front of me. Long beard, robes – damn.

"...Old Hubba." I muttered, frowning. Well, at least I think he's Old Hubba. "This is your fault then?"

"Of course it is!" He scoffed. "Catch"

Well, that's a nice shield. All metal and blue and pretty.  
"Let's see you break that. Useless."

"...so...no explanations then?"

"Not yet." He grinned.

"Of course not, that would be a logical and helpful thing to happen to me." I groaned. "Nothing like that seems to happen anymore."

Old Hubba smirked and slowly faded away. "Just remember Cameron...you can't afford to be reckless here..."

...

the hell? That's something Eugene used to say to me before he...died...a year a...go...

...

I played Old Hubba at chess? How the hell did that happen?

What the hell is going on?

**  
A/N: No-one ever reads these things, but whatever. This fic is designed for two things: A foray into Self-Insert fics for fun, and also to experiment with a more 'realistic' portrayal of the first-person view by actually getting into their head. People may recognise its similarity to the 'Riverspeak' segments of the Firefly fanfic Forward, but I don't intend (Nor have the skill) to rip off something that amazing. Anyway, if it turns out to not work I'll drop it, but at least let me know what you think about that aspect first. Any problems you have will be added to the following list of things I will try to fix over the fic's run.

WEAKNESSES I AM AWARE OF: I am a Scriptwriting student, and I have an over-reliance on dialogue. I will need to improve on this over the course of the fic.

Thanks for giving it a shot~!

-G2G

EDIT 25/03/2013: I just realized I never described myself. D'oh. Fixed that.

EDIT 14/05/2013: Nothing major, switched some words around and stuff like that.


	2. Chapter One (Cam I)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter One – Sliding**

"You know" I commented, staring at the hunk of cheerfully burned meat in front of me. "I'm not exactly fussy...but who the hell eats bear?"

Laughter. Smirks. Lissa getting too excited again. All the usual things.

God. Usual things. I've been with them for like, three hours. Amazing what you can learn on a three hour walk. Robin's the type to seem to go for all the good guy options, like not sacrificing Emm. Nice enough guy, but he comes off a little...know-it-all-ish.

Seeing as this is the guy I listen to in order to _not die_ this seems like a good thing for once.

"...you're messing with the food chain..."

God bless the dialogue in this game-

NO

Bad Cameron. No thinking of it as a game. It isn't. It might be.

I don't frigging know anymore. The pain was real enough. What the hell is Hubba doing with me? Is he, like, Fire Emblem's version of Q? Why is he dragging Eugene into this whole mess?

Ugh

Focus. Just...don't ask questions. Just avoid dying. That's hard enough. Especially since this may very well be on Lunatic, although it seems that Chrom has been scaled in badass appropriately. I never got that, why were all these 'educated royals' worse fighters than wandering swordsmen you find later in the game? Reality ensues, I guess.

"Hey, Cameron." Robin asked, turning to me. "What were you doing in that village, anyway?"

Damn. Make something up make something up make something up -

"I got lost."

...well it's kind of the truth.

"A wandering adventurer without a map." Frederick muttered to himself, staring at me. Hey, back off man!

"It seemed like a good idea at the time!" I protested. Defend character traits. "Besides, the map probably got wet when I got thrown off the boat."

"...boat?" Chrom asked curiously. "What boat?"

"I was on a merchant ship, trying to get to Valm. Big storm happens, I'm on top of the boat, I get thrown off the boat - thankfully I had my kitbag on me when it happened - and ended up in the middle of the ocean. I must have hit my head on something, because I woke up on the beach without a bloody clue where I was."

Robin flinched. "Yeesh, that's rough. Why were you heading to Valm?"

"I was kind of island-skipping at the time, but it's hard to find work on such a small area." I shrugged. "So, naturally, I decided to head for the biggest possible landmass I knew about and figured my luck would be better in Chon'sin or something."

Thank you obscure knowledge about separate Valm countries that's finally becoming useful. That should wave off any suspicion about what I was doing.

"That's so cool." Lissa sighed. Damn, girl, you've actually got stars in your eyes. "You must have seen some pretty weird things..."

"...yeah, you could say that. For the most part, though, it was just wandering from place to place getting odd meals when I could and trying to figure out why it was always raining or snowing on me." As proud as I am of my heritage, it really needs to stop raining so much in Scotland. Canada's climate was just taking the mick at that point.

With that, the conversations died down and everybody decided to go to bed.

Oh WOW am I tired. Yawning. Right.

Sleep is important. But freaking fantasy ghost zombie things are going to attack us in a bit.

...sod it, sleep is still more important.

"Night, Robin" I muttered, lying back on my own bedroll.

I don't fall...asleep...ea...

* * *

Burning. Burning burning.

Fire.

Earth shaking. Get up. Wake up.

WAKE UP YOU FOOL DEMON ZOMBIES ARE COMING

Sword. Where's my sword. Got it. Shield.

Okay. Robin's here. Frederick must have gone off looking for Lissa and Chrom. The world is...good god. The game did not do this justice. The forest is burning, the ground is shattered and the...oh god. We have to move now.

Stay in character.

"Where's the Captain?" Shout, get Robin's attention.

"I don't know! Frederick's trying to find him now!"

"Oh, just great!"

This was when the gate opened. A giant blue eye of Sauron with evil zombies running at us. And in the distance...oh. Oh that explains a lot.

Thousands of them. Thousands of gates opening everywhere. Hundreds of risen released simultaneously. On unprepared villages and cities. The very thought of this is horrifying. They never touched on the consequences much in the game, but...no. This isn't helping.

Focus on not dying, Cameron. Push that to the back of your mind along with you killing a bunch of men, you cannot afford to break down right now.

Speaking of not dying, axe risen. At least...five, maybe six of them. With no Frederick, Chrom, Lissa or Lucina to ride to our rescue. Well, this didn't happen in the game-NO. Do not rely on the game. It would never translate properly. There must be differences.

"Well..." Swallow. Move backwards. Bump into Robin. "I'm take the three dozen to the east, you take the two dozen to the west?"

Nervous laughter. Good. Hot Fuzz style humor is important. It'll get you through this. Focus. Here they come. Thankfully easier to predict than living enemies. Bat away the first axe, slash across the chest. Move behind the defeated one, convert momentum into a shield smash to knock the second down. Do a slightly more realistic version of the finishing blow from Wind Waker on the knocked down one, then roll away from the final risen.

Face them.

Oh.

Wait.

Them?

They just got back up.

This...this isn't good.

Well, I guess this cinches it. I'm in lunatic mode. I'm screwed.

"Bring it on."

That probably sounded a lot braver than I feel right now.

They lurch forward. Solution? Bull rush the middle one with the shield. Knock it over. Ignore it for now. Spin, face the other two. Block one's swing with the shield, stab the other in the gut while it prepares.

Sword is stuck. Damn.

Okay. Just...wrench it...out..

Oh god, did I just rip it in half? That...that is disgusting. Christ. Thank god it wasn't a human, I don't think I'd be able to take seeing someone's cut-in-half brain.

Doesn't matter. Face remaining one. The one I just took out faded into mist, so I'll take that as a 's what happened in the cutscenes anyway.

If they can turn into mist and reform then this would be our extinction event, so I'll pray that isn't what they do.

Naturally, Robin decided to show me up by blitzing my remaining standing Risen with a lightning bolt.

"Well, that's four for me."

Oh, you wanna hold a counting contest? Bring it on.

Oh, right, I'm still standing on one. Right. Stab it in the face, it's dead.

"Two for me, and I can't do ranged." Smirk. "First to ten buys a drink."

Robin grinned. "Seems fair. Let's go find Chrom and the others."

Thankfully, that was easy enough. Just follow the swarm of Risen.

"Seven!" Robin barked.

"...Ranged kills don't count?"

"Sorry, should have specified before we started."

Oh Robin, was that a hint of smugness? I really need to knock you down a peg.

If I had a ranged attack I would.

If you would stop annihilating everything I moved towards I would.

...

So, that's how the Veteran skill works IRL. If he's working with someone, everything dies and I feel incompetent. Seems accurate.

"And that's ten." Robin grinned. "Best two out of three?"

"Go to hell, Robin" Groan. I could have really used a drink at this point, and I'm not normally a fan of alcohol. Still, getting drunk might have been a bad idea, especially as the last time I got even slightly tipsy I actually started genuinely enjoying the second Bayformer movie. Oh, right, it looks like we reached Chrom. Aw, is the fight over already?

"Chrom! What's going on!" Robin yelled, clambering over a fallen tree. Looks like Sully and Virion are already there.

"I'm not sure." Chrom growled. "We have to deal with these things and report this to the Exalt."

Oh, god, Chrom growling sounds way too god-damn sexy for its own good. Shake head, breathe carefully.

"Chrom, there must be hundreds of these things spread all over Ylisse. This is a serious problem."

Chrom violently stabbed Falchion into a nearby tree.

"I am _aware_, Cameron, I am not _blind_."

...that...seemed rather OOC. Okay.

"Sorry, Chrom. It's just this...this is pretty messed up." Nervous laughter. "I don't know about you, but I'm not so confident about fighting things that don't even breathe."

"They can die."

Oh, hello Lucina, how are you? Oh, god, remember to call her Marth for now.

"Yeah, we noticed that on the way here, mister." Snark is called for, Cameron, lest you go insane. "Or did you not notice the repetitive puffs of smoke as Robin there kept stealing my kills? I just lost a bet."

Robin at least had the good graces to look embarrassed. Oh, hey, Lucina's paying attention to him.

...

Don't squee.

"I saw. Impressive."  
DON'T SQUEE.

"...thank you, sir..?"

Good, I managed to avoid squee'ing. For now.

"You may call me Marth."

"After the Hero King, I assume?" Chrom asked casually, retrieving Falchion.

"Gentlemen and angels, as much as I would enjoy some sophisticated conversation right now should we not deal with the current threat? I, archest of archers, shall stride to protect you all!"

Oh hey Virion. Guess that means...yep, some more are coming out now. Wonderful. Robin started scanning the battlefield.

"Chrom, Cameron, I want you on the front lines, draw their attention. Frederick, Sully, ride in from the Western flank. Virion, you and I will take up a position behind those old walls and offer cover fire. Lissa, you're with us until someone needs healing. Marth, could you cover the Eastern-"

He paused right in the middle of full tactician mode, frowning.

"-he's gone? Right, okay. I can work with this. Frederick, Sully, take up positions on opposite flanks. When I cast a Thunder spell into the air, that's your signal to ride in and catch them in the pincers. Are we clear?"

A brief chorus of aye floated around, even before I realized that he'd put me in the middle. Dammit. Still, not much time to complain, just do as very smart tactician says. Moving faster, trying to catch up with Chrom who had left before knowing the whole plan. Here they come, about fifteen of them. Jesus christ, fifteen.

"Cameron, are you alright?"

"Well, I'm still a bit shell-shocked from the fact that we are fighting evil purple mist monsters that fell from the sky, but I think I'll hold up well for now yes." Half truths at least.

Fifty paces. Fourty paces.

Christ.

"Good. Don't worry, I'll watch your back."

"Fair enough. I've got yours."

Twenty-five. Jesus.

Twenty. Bloody

Fifteen. Wept.

Ten paces away. Brace yourself-huh?

Apparently Virion had started firing, because I'm sure there used to be more of them. Yeah, two came down really quickly. Okay, a burst of lightning cinches it, that would be cover fire. Oh, five paces. CONTACT.

Okay, first one gets shoved back by shield. Decapitate. Crouch and brace the shield, catching the impact from the next few blows. Stab one in the face a few times until it fades into mist. Fall into a rythm to deal with the other two. Block. Parry, move, block, shield bash, finishing attack of some kind.  
Crap. Missed one. Off-balance. Going to-no, nevermind, Falchion blocked it. Now it's dead.

"Thanks." Gasp. Already feeling short of breath. I'm not a super-soldier, just average, but that's a step above from before. From this point I may become badass. Just...oh, crap, I'm like Amelia or Ross from Sacred Stones aren't I? Except maybe not with such a good end result. I hope not.

"Don't mention it." Chrom muttered, falling back into position. Damn, did more just show up? I hope not-There. That's the signal. Thunder in the sky. Thank god. Frederick and Sully showed up just in time. Hot damn, that cavalry charge is mowing them down. Stil, what now-

"Charge!"  
Damn it, Robin, stop making me move forwards.

Run after them. Pace yourself. Prepare for combat. Wait, I'm running. There's one there. Sod it. Sprint full speed, raise shield, SLAM into it, move shield – holy crap, I just sent it flying. My god. Okay, don't get too excited, you're at a full stop now. Just...just stay calm. Oh, crap, I think the impact with that tree I sent it into might have killed it. Yep, it's dead.

I'm awesome. Huh, that's interesting, I don't remember my chest being wet before. Um.

...There's a sword sticking through my chest.

Augh. Crap. It just got pulled out. Shit. Shitshit.

Can I go one fight without mortal injury?

Oh crap. Crap, it got a lung. Crap. I...schiese, is this what drowning feels like? It's...oh god oh god oh god. It's warm. I can't breathe. I...gotta move. Can't breathe. Gotta move. Block. Breathe don't breathe fool. Crap. Okay, okay, okay. Risen...Falchion? What?  
Chrom? No, wait, not Chrom. Shit, can't stand up anymore. Can't breathe. Blacking out. Lucina? A little help here?  
No? Just gonna let me die? Wait, what do you think you're doing with Falchion? No! Don't frigging mercy-kill me, we have a healer! Don't-

Oh. Why does my chest hurt less?

...Right, Parallel Falchion can heal user. Guess she can use that power on others somehow. Crap. I've still got blood in my lungs so...uh...I might have ended up vomiting blood all over Lucina's shoes. Great. Wonderful first impression to make on the world-saving badass princess, Cameron. Smartass who gets stabbed. Perfect.

"thanks" God, my voice sounds shit. Wait, she's gone. Dammit. Get up. Right. Okay. Huh, Chrom's gone into a bit of a berserk rage. One's about to get him.

Well, I can't move right now, so...throw sword?

I guess?  
Stupid plan, but whatever.

Wait, that wasn't my sword. That was my shield. Shit.

Oh, wait, it bowled him over. Nevermind. I'm a genius.

Can I walk yet? Not really. Chrom looks surprised. Guess he'll deal. Lissa's finally here. Looks like they're all gone now.

"I'm fine, Marth healed me." I grunted. Voice is back, stil slippery. That'd be the blood in there, then. "I really need to wear some armor."

"That might be an idea." Chrom smiled, lifting his shirt to reveal not bare abs as the fangirls expected but rather a slim sheet of chainmail. "Useful for glancing blows."

"Yeah, I'll get me some of that later." God. "Healing staffs don't replace lost blood, do they?"

"No." Frederick said calmly.

"Well...that's not good. If you don't mind, I think I'll hobble the rest of the way."

Chrom shook his head. "It's too dangerous to keep you with us for much longer. It's only a day's ride to the Shepard's barracks, Sully can take you there."  
Huh. Well then. Fair enough.

"Not gonna turn down that offer." I mutter, standing up slowly. "I'll try and mount myself, if you don't mind-"  
Oh, hey, that floor is getting rather close now isn't it-

* * *

A/N: Well that response was reassuring. Cheers guys, I'll do my best to keep up and hopefully not stall out. Next time, introductions to the Shepards and blatant want to skip the scenes that are in the game already. Thanks for reading, guys!

- G2G

FOLLOWING IS ALL REVIEW RESPONSES. Skip if you want.

Kingawesome: I may or may not pair myself, I'm not sure. It really depends on how I progress. Besides, there's a plot element regarding my prescense that may make things really...wierd if I pair.

Nanashi Wanderer: If you avoid self-inserts most of the time, you might want to check out **How Not to Write Evangelion SelfInsertions** by sentinel28/Gendo Ikari. Even if you're not a fan of EVA, it's still a laugh or people that don't like the genre or view it as a guilty pleasure.

Thedarknesswithin96: I am aiming for making sure that people understand injuries hurt, yes :D

Archsage12: Thanks a lot! Better drop one of the subtitles for 'Humor' at this rate...

Pikapikaluv: FE13 is pretty much made for SI's at first glance, what with Robin and all, but he's kind of his own character so it is pretty hard. Surprised no-one did it Day One though.

Gunlord500: I'm about 10 chapters into Wayward Son, I'm holding off writing a comprehensive review until I've seen all of it, but merely attracting your attention is awesome sir.

Fan person: Aw, damn it, part of the Scriptwriting is showing through? Gonna have to fix that.

WEAKNESSES I AM AWARE OF: Over-Reliance on dialogue, **similarites to a production script over an actual story.**

EDIT 14/05/2013: Added some extra dialogue at the start, fixed some mistakes.


	3. Chapter Two (Cam II)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter Two – Meeting the Shepherds**

Well, that could have gone better. Must remember to get some armor before heading out next time. Lesson I probably should have learned faster, and without almost dying for the second time in two days to learn it.

Right. Bearings.

Unfamiliar ceiling. Wooden. I'm in a bed.

...

A glorious actual bed for the first time since I came here. You know, I think I'll stay here for a while – I can smell tea.

Tea.

Gods be praised, TEA.

What can I say? You can find the Scot anywhere you want, but you can't find a Scot who doesn't like tea. Swear to it.

Sod the bed, I need a cuppa.

"Well, that was a fast reaction." A mildly surprised voice commented. Probably Maribelle. Straighten up. Good impressions.

"To what, exactl-ow."

Okay, sat up too fast. Upper body wrapped in bandages. Not good. Yeah, that's definitely Maribelle though. Stupid dress, stupid hair, stupid parasol and more importantly TEA. Actual frigging tea.

"Hm. Only thing that changed was that Ricken was darling enough to bring me some tea. Was that it?"

Oh, right, Ricken's technically a Shephard to an extent. He's just not allowed to fight or something. Because, y'know, he's _fourteen_.

"Yes. Tea. I thought I could smell something familiar." Wince. Okay. Sit up properly and – wow. Okay, dimension jumping is the best workout ever because I look _good_. Except for the bandages everywhere.

...

I need to stop getting stabbed. Twice in two days is a bad thing. Back on track.

"Familiar?" Oh, wow, Maribelle, that raised eyebrow would impress Vetinari. "Are you a noble, then?"

"Not as such" Finally no more wincing. "Family was pretty well off, owned a little bit of land, but no titles or anything. We just really liked tea."

Hooray for half-truths. One hereditary country house in the south of France should count as a little bit of land, right?

"Hm. At least you aren't common."

Okay, that's a bit rude Maribelle.

"I shall take that as the part-compliment I am sure it was meant to be." Take care. Proper phrasing. Don't upset the only healer on base right now. "Anyway, how long was I out?"

"About a week. Sully got you here five days ago." She shrugged. "We couldn't even rouse you since. Not even Vaike's idiotic shouting even made you so much as turn over."

What can I say, I'm a deep sleeper." I mutter. Okay, this room's pretty nice actually. "I take it this is the Shepherd's base then?"

Maribelle just gave a curt nod and sipped her tea. Damn, no extra cup. Shame.

"Good. Where am I exactly?"

She actually looked surprised that I asked. "Your room, of course."

"...the rough-and-tumble vigilante force get individual rooms?" Incredulous. That can't be right.

She sniffed. "It used to belong to Ricken's family as a country residence for distant relatives. Mine bought it when they fell on hard times, and donated it to Prince Chrom for personal use."

"So he used the country house as a makeshift barracks. That's impressive." Explains how the hell you manage to fit everyone too. "I don't believe I caught your name...milady."

Oh god, wrong thing to say. Well, not really, but she just became all puffed up at being called 'milady' so I'm pretty sure I'm going to regret this.

"Lady Maribelle."

Fine. Rougish grin, rub head. "I'm Cameron, wandering nobody. Nice to meet you."

Wow, that's an interesting array of colors for your face to go through Maribelle.

"You might want to get some more rest. You lost a lot of blood." She stammered. "I'll ask Ricken to bring up some tea."

With that awkward moment passed, she left in a hurry. Well, guess I'm sitting here for the next few days. Wonderful.

...

Manamanah doo-doo-doo do do Manamanah doo-doo-doo do. Manamanah doo-doo-do do do, do do do, do do do do do doo-doo-doo do do.

Manamana na nananah, mananah na na na na nah. Manananah, nah, nahnahanah, nah, nah nah. Manamanah!

I've killed four me~en

And I've almost di~ed multiple times!

...

Okay, sod it, I've been in this world for almost two weeks, I'm going to take some time to address the fact that I killed three people at _least_. It cannot be healthy leaving that stuck in the back of my mind. At all.

I killed people in preemptive self defense. Okay. They were going to hurt not only be, but other people too. One of them hurt me. You killed them to prevent further suffering. I'm okay with this. I'm not sure how I'll be able to handle killing soldiers that are just following orders later on, though. It'd be too much.

No, no thinking about the future. Just the here and now.

Don't think about the past either. Don't think about how your family and friends must be reacting. Don't think about how scared and sad they must be. Don't. Think. About. It. Here. And Now. Ylisse. Not Earth. Shephards, not Risen. Shephards, not Grima.

"Hey!"

Oh thank god, Ricken's here to distract me.

"Hey yourself." Okay, back to snarky british dude mode, not emo out-of-his-depth teenager mode. "I'm Cameron."

"I know. Sully told us." He shrugged. "I'm Ricken. Maribelle said you wanted some tea-"

"Yes. Dear gods above yes. I would kill for a cuppa right now."

Huh, Ricken's eyes got all wide and scared as he passed me a cup. Hrmn. Earl Grey, black. Sod it, I'll fix it up with some milk and sugar when I make it myself.

"Ricken, you are an angel from above." I said seriously "I frigging mean it. You have no idea how much I have been looking forwards to this."

"...You really like tea, huh."

"You have no idea how much I like tea."

Oh, that hit the spot. Perfect. Huh, I can feel myself slipping back into unconsciousness already.

"Maribelle drugged my tea, didn't she?"

Ricken nodded. "Said something about 'how dare such a low-born wanderer flirt with me' and put some sleep drops in it."

...how the hell was that flirting?

"Well." I mutter. "That's...that's just great. Good night, I guess."

"Sleep well!" Dear gods, Ricken, stop being cheerful all the time.

* * *

I woke up again what I would guess is a day later, and at least I could sit up without being in unbelievable pain, which was an improvement. Huh, knock at the door. Wonder who I'll end up meeting today.

"Come on in" Oh god, my voice sounds like crap. I need a drink. Still the door opened, and...oh, hey Sumia.

"You're awake, good!" Dear lord, Sumia's smile is the most anime thing I have ever seen. "We were worried that Maribelle might have used too many. We got her to promise to apologize for overreacting, though"

"Thanks" Straighten up a bit more. "Who are you again?"

...Sumia blushing is also the most anime thing I have ever seen. "Oh! I'm Sumia. I'm just in training to become a Shepherd."

"Nice to meet you, seeing as we're in the same boat." I chuckled. "I don't suppose you have a drink or something, do you?"

Sumia nodded cheerfully. Oh, thank god, food and water. I could very nearly kiss you right now if it wasn't for the high probability of Chrom ripping my throat out.

Oh god, there's a loose plank on the floor. Please, let the tripping be exaggerated in the game-nope, nope, there goes my food. And-oh god, she just fell on the ribs. Yep, that hurts. Sumia scrambled off, apologizing frequently.

"It's alright, accidents happen." Oh god, the pain. Yeesh.

"They always happen to – oh! Your chest!"

Look down – oh, son of a bitch, the wound opened up and there's red everywhere.

"Ah. Well. I...don't suppose you could go get a healer, could you?" Damn it, this hurts. Still not as bad as when I was stabbed, though.

There's an awkward silence as Sumia just stares at me.

Whirr click click...

"Ah. The only healer's Maribelle, isn't it."

Awkward nodding.

"Right. Naturally. Could you go get her anyway, please?"

"Right!"

Well, bye Sumia, don't trip on the way out the door-OH COME ON!

* * *

Maribelle glared as she finally put the Mend staff away.

"Look, Maribelle, I swear that I was not trying to flirt with you." I said after a few seconds. "I was really just trying to be polite, and I'm sorry."

Icy glare. Ow.

"...I have never been good with girls, okay? I'm-"

"Well, mayhap you require some assistance!"

I...what?

Oh, god damn it Virion. Why are you here.

"Hey. Never caught your name." I muttered, shifting away from the still irritated Maribelle.

"I am Virion, the archest of archers-"

"Yeah, no, I got that bit." Cut off the rambling aristocrat before he really starts to go on. "So, did everyone else make it back already?"

Virion, cut off mid speech, just sort of nodded sheepishly. "Indeed."

"Right. I kind of want to know exactly how much trouble we're in."

Oh, god, swing my legs over the side and try to stand up – and the floor is approaching rather quickly now isn't it – oof.

"Are you okay?" A deep-ish voice asked

"Who the hell caught me?" I asked, bewildered.

Oh. Erm. Sorry, Kellam. I was honestly not expecting for you to actually be hard to see.

Kellam sighed. "I've been standing there for the last three minutes. I'm Kellam."

"Right. Sorry for not seeing you somehow, and nice to meet you." Sheepish. Okay, let's just go downstairs. Right, working my way downstairs now. Everyone I haven't really talked to yet is already there, waiting for Chrom to make his report. So, that'd be...Miriel, Vaike and Sully. Oh, yeah, Stahl's off eating. Okay, then.

"Cameron. Are you all right?" Geez, Chrom, thanks for prioritizing me I guess. Concern for your men showing through there.  
"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about the blood, Maribelle already took care of it-"

Maribelle just bowled me over running for Lissa. Son of a – geez, Kellam, thanks for the catch again.

"That keeps happening, which is annoying." I muttered as Kellam helped me into a chair. "Thanks, Kellam."

Chrom nodded. "Alright, introductions. For those of you how haven't met him yet, the injured man is Cameron, our new recruit. This" He gestured over at Robin "Is Robin, our new tactician, and Virion, our archer."

There's assorted greetings shared at the table before Chrom basically gives the same report from the game. I kind of zoned out for a while, but come back into focus when he gets to the mission.

"Anyway, we'll be setting out for Regna Ferox in a week." He said calmly. "We are to deal with the Khans and request reinforcements for a possible war with Plegia that Exalt Emmeryn is trying to avoid, as well as to deal with the Risen that are arising throughout the countryside."

Alright, then.  
"To deal with the Risen, however, we will need to split into groups."

Wait.

What.

"Accompanying me to Regna Ferox will be Lissa, Frederick, Sumia, Robin, Miriel and Virion."

What.

"Remaining here to patrol and deal with nearby parties of Risen are Sully, Stahl, Vaike, Maribelle, Cameron and Kellam."

...

what.

"As far as this secondary mission goes, Sully and Stahl are sharing command."  
I...what?

"If we are in need of reinforcements, we shall send a messenger back requesting them." Chrom finished. "Any questions?"

I...this makes too much sense for me to bitch about. I'll have to roll with it. Thankfully, the rest of the table erupts into complete chaos.

"What do you mean, you aren't taking Teach with you?" Vaike roared. "You need me to watch your back!"

"Captain, you arse, you can't split us up, you'll end up spitted on a bunch of spears without me to watch your back-"

Okay, sod it, I can't deal with this arguing.

"ENOUGH!"

Wow, everyone actually shut up and looked at me. Uhm. Let's roll with it, then.

"Listen, I'm not happy that we're sending the prince off into potentially unfriendly territory with half his available forces, but our first priority should be the civilians of the country we guard, not our own feelings! I don't know if you noticed, but we've got a few hundred of these freaks wandering around at the very least, so I don't know about you but I'd quite like it if there was a country left for Chrom to _save_ when he returns with a bunch of angry barbarian warrior men!"

There was an awkward silence before they all slumped back and muttered varied levels of assent. Alright, then. Chrom nodded his thanks towards me.

Odd how this is the most coherent I've ever been and it's due to a bunch of people screaming at each other across the table.

"Thank you, Cameron. Now, we'll be leaving in one week, so I recommend you all prepare."

Son of a bitch, why is everything all going horribly wrong?

* * *

A/N: Pretty much what happened in making this take longer than Prologue/CH1:  
"Hey Cameron, you should read Homestuck some time" – A Friend

"Yeah, sure" – Me

*Ten Hours Later*

"Oh God Dammit, I had things to do today."

*Starts writing chapter*

"Hey Cameron, don't you have a D&D game to run tonight?" - The Same Friend

"Oh, son of a-"  
*Plan and run game*

"...fine. Now I can finally write – oh, hey, Homestuck."

*1AM In the morning*

"god damn it Andrew Hussie."

Anyway, I'm gonna hold off writing another chapter till Wednesday and go back correcting some errors I spotted in the last two and probably this one.

EDIT01: Damn it , stop removing my linebreaks.

EDIT 14/05/2013: A few grammar and spelling corrections, with a few lines of dialogue added here and there.


	4. Chapter Three (Cam III)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter Three – Week's Notice**

Well, I'm up and walking again, but in an aimless blue void. Huh.

I would be more surprised but to be perfectly honest this just about as much sense than anything else that's happened to me recently. Alright, let's just...just go over this again.

I'm in an aimless blue void with no clue how I got here. Alright.

So, either I got dumped in_ yet another_ world (Unlikely) or I'm dreaming and this is some stupid Inception shite.

It's quite honestly probably the latter. Oh, hey, my palm's on fire.

...

OH GOD, MY PALM'S ON FIRE. PUTITOUTPUTITOUTPUTITOUT.

Wait. Why doesn't it hurt. Okay, fire's gone. Huh.

Well.

For some reason I've got the stupid Rift Gate inventory logo emblazoned on my palm now. Whatever, I guess-

"Knight to E4."

-um. Look down.

Okay, I'm on a square labeled E4, which means – it suddenly got dark. Look up.

That's a god-damn chess piece the size of a castle coming towards my head. Mock laughter.

"Reckless, Cameron"

Oh, Eugune or Hubba or whoever you are, you can just go right to hell and burn there.

Ker-_plunk_

* * *

Awake. I'm awake. Okay. Right. Still bandaged, still in my own room. Hand. Check hand.

It's still there. Okay. Well, I'm sure that won't turn out to be some wierd-ass plot point. Nope, not at all.

I've read way too much bad fantasy literature. Seriously, should have stuck to Lord of the Rings, the Night Angel Trilogy and Song of Ice&Fire...dammit Matthew, why did you have to share so much crap with me?

You know what? I can walk now, it's sunrise, I'm going to try and get some training done. It's the first time in my life I've been physically fit, after all.

Dear god that's sad and I can't believe I just admitted that to myself. Anyway, let's just get down to the sparring room and do some...drills I guess?

Oh thank god, there's a training dummy and practice swords. Okay. Let's do this thing.

About two hours must have passed before I actually had to stop. Okay, that's good cardio. Wow. The stupid dummy doesn't even have a dent in it.

"What the hell is this thing made of, lead?" Wheeze.

"It better be!" Huh? Who? "Otherwise it wouldn't be able to handle Teach?"

Oh god, no.

"Step aside, newbie! It's -"

Say it and I will murder you in your sleep.

"Vaike time!"

...

Right. I warned you. It'll be right in your eye.

I swear.

Still, might as well take five while waiting. Dear god, he's really whaling on that thing isn't he.

"Taking a break?" A wry voice asked.

Oh, hey Sully.

"Guess you could say that." I said slowly. Good, my breathing's back to normal.

"You sound fine."  
Oh god, please no.

"Why don't you show me what you can do when you've not got a sword in your chest?"

Crap.

Still, can't exactly turn that down. Stand back up, find sword and shield again, fall into position at the sparring ring. Dear god, this is going to suck on so many levels.

Okay. Okay. Stay calm. Raise shield and – OH GOD SHE'S FAST

Damn. Only just managed to block that first thrust. I'm going to need to keep going carefully here – ungh. Okay. That was lucky.  
What are you doing, you fool? Don't let her keep the advantage, push for chrissakes.

"Come on!" Sully taunted. Oh, lord, more thrusts. Damn, the games never stated how fast these things were. Still, small tip meeting large surface area – oh, wait, she's forcing me back. Push forward.

Incoming practice lance. Lunge forwards and meet it with shield. Keep pushing.

Heh, Sully looks surprised. Her lance is off-balance. Bring the sword down – aww, she rolled out of the way – OH GOD FLOOR.

Huh. She must have swept my legs out from me with the lance during the roll. Interesting. Roll over. Damn, it's coming down again, bat it away. Stand up – oh, hello lance tip. Please don't hit my eyeball.

"Yield?" She asked with a smirk. Oh, piss off.

"Yield." I wheezed. Damn, can't breathe again. Sweat everywhere.

She shrugged and clapped my shoulder on the way past. "For someone who only just got back on his feet, you're not bad kid."

Can't breathe. Just nod in thanks. Right, let's go sit down...over...there...

...

Oh thank god, water. "You looked like you could use some." Stahl commented. I just nodded and began drinking desperately. "I don't think we've been introduced. I'm Stahl."

Nod, put down the now-empty canteen. "I'm Cameron."

Stahl grinned. "Want to get some breakfast?"

Oh, god yes, actual food. "Stahl." I sighed and pulled myself up. "This is the start of a beautiful friendship. Now where's the food?"

* * *

Well, on the bright side Sully didn't cook. On the downside, I miss Earth food. Seriously. I want some god damn corn flakes or something. Still...it's pretty much a full English breakfast. Sausages, eggs and all.

I still miss cereal, and granola bars, and stuff like that. It's actually really disturbing how much I'm missing the simple things over my family.

Oh, right. I pushed the family things to the back of my mind to be ignored until I can go home. Right. Get back in there thoughts. You don't get a say in this right now. We've been over this, I do not think about home yet. I'll do that later.

Okay?

Okay.

Good.

"You alright?" Stahl asked. Oh, right, not alone. "You've been sitting there staring at your sausages for the last five minutes."

Oops.

"Yeah. Just thinking about home." Yeah, let's just get some of it out. "Not sure how they're doing and all."

Stahl shrugged. "Hey, I'm sure they're getting on just fine."

Yeah, they probably are actually. I was moving out soon anyway, and hey, maybe there's some weird time compression Doctor Who thing happening here and as soon as I deal with this problem I'll end up right where I started.

"Yeah, probably. Ah well, it's not like there's anything I can do about it from here."

Food.

Eating now.

* * *

Breakfast was about an hour, actually. A bunch of other people came down and joined us, evidently not surprised by the fact that Stahl was eating already. Miriel launched into some stupid study of why that sausage gave off a strangely-colored flame that I think I learned in high school and forgot, while Kellam – yeah, I actually saw him this time – stood in a corner drinking some kind of juice. Sumia nearly tripped while carrying a whole tray of assorted cheeses, and Chrom managed to catch her.

Yeah, it's pretty obvious what ship is happening right now.

Maribelle's still not talking to me, all while Virion tried desperately to catch her attention and failed even more horribly than I did. So much for that advice, mate. Ricken was apparently the one cooking, and he did a pretty good job actually. Lissa just chattered inanely during most of it, but in an odly cheering way unlike those stupid, depraved blonde _attention seekers in my scriptwriting class who don't know what characterization is-_

Oh, wow, I'm still hung up over that?

Vaike and Sully finally dragged themselves back in, both drenched in sweat and going straight for what little meat was left after Chrom was through with it. Frederick stood there looking all dignified and nibbling on some kind of thick brown bread.

Then there was Robin. Oh god, Robin has so much character development right now that I just can't believe it. He definitely fits the personality shown in the Lucina reports, so go shipping go, but he's actually fairly light-hearted, except when it comes to looking after people.

Which might explain why I'm looking at a chess board with a suspiciously low number of white pieces left on my side. Oh, hey, he's put me in check again. With a pawn.

That I cannot capture.

...

You magnificent bastard, Robin. Ugh.

Fine, move the king back. Wait. Waitwaitwait-OH COME ON!

How...but...

Okay, that's bollocks. That knight hasn't been moved for _**ten turns**_. It was his first three moves, and now I'm in checkmate because that knight is locking down almost all of its moves. His stupid queen finishes to job.

...

_**TEN**_

_**TURNS**_

"Did you seriously plan ahead that far?" Disbelief. A little bit of anger.

Robin shrugged. "I could tell that you'd be a little reckless-"

Oh, naturally. Of course that frigging term would come up again. Seriously, since I came here, I've heard 'Reckless' more than Douglas Adams used the number 42.

"-and that you'd probably ignore a piece left out in the middle of nowhere. From there, I just had to make sure you kept ignoring it for larger threats and then I backed you right into it." Robin smirked. "It also helped that you insisted on taking the first turn and showed your playstyle by freeing up your rook."

Gentlemen, we are in good hands. This man knows what he is doing.

Groan. Stand up. Oh, hey, Vaike's passing by.

"Well, good luck Vaike. I'm sure you'll do better than me!" I said cheerfully, clapping a hand on his shoulder and steering him towards the table. "I'm going to go work myself to death in the training room again."

"Have fun with that." Robin said, not missing a beat. Vaike looked at the board in complete confusion. Well, let's see who we've got in here right now – oh. Hey, Chrom.

Wait. Crap.

"Cameron." Chrom nodded, loosening his stance and relaxing. "How are you fitting in?"

Well, we're doing this now. Um, support relationship grows to C?

"Oh, fine enough I think." I shrugged "I think I said something to annoy Maribelle at some point, but everyone else seems fine."

Chrom sighed. "Oh, yeah, I should have asked someone to warn you. She's a...bit slow to warm up to people, and you did kind of mess up."

Ugh.

"Figures" I groaned, grabbing a practice song. "I've always sucked at talking to other people, why'd you think I ended up in the middle of nowhere by myself?"

Heh. Jokes. Totally not stalling here. Still, it did get a bit of a laugh out of Chrom, so - OH GOD, SWORD.

"What the hell?" Step back. Protest. "What the actual hell?"

Chrom fell back into a fighting position. Ah, crap, where's my shield. I'm going to need it.

"I figured your reflexes had to be pretty good." Chrom shrugged. "I wanted to check if you could handle being back here, it'll probably be the more dangerous job."

He's...got a fair point. Well, it won't turn out to be, but looking at it from an outsider's perspective does make the mission to Ferox less dangerous than staying here fighting demon zombies. Alright, then. Groan, prepare myself.

This is going to _suck_.

Yeah, here comes his practice sword. Block and – oh, god, he's strong. And fast, because three more just hit my shield in rapid succession. I...can't see any openings. Keep blocking. Footwork, damn it Cameron you've read the Drizzt books you know how important footwork is why are you not moving your feet you idiot MOVE YOUR FEET.

Right. Shuffle back and to the right, keeping my left side facing him and blocking the strikes. Oh, god, still no openings. I guess being trained by royal frigging knights all of your life pays off far more than the game implies.

I can't afford to wait for the opening, he's numbing my arm from all these hits and I can't keep up for much longer. I'm going to have to push. Okay, here comes his swing, and – lash out with shield. Oh, hey, it worked, his sword got batted away. Cut – yeah, he dodged. Bring shield down on his head – nope, he – wait, did he just roll away from standing and back to standing?

How out of my league am I right now?

...

Wait. Fire Emblem Cutscene Physics, not real world physics. Try that. Uhm...Dive to the side and roll to feet, lashing out at his legs?

Wait, did that just WORK? Okay, he dodged, but...oh, wow, it's going to take some time to adjust to a different version of reality. I might have something resembling a Skill score, but no actual skill. OH GOD, HE'S DOING THE JUMPING SPINNING THING MOVE AWAY YOU IDIOT.

Well, that was way too close – oh. Crap. Well, I only just managed to dodge the follow up.

Follow-ups follow up.

The follow-up to the follow-up of the follow-up. What the hell? Is he going to give me any time here?

I'm against a wall. Son of a – DOOOOOOOOOODGE!

Jump to side. Oh, hey, he smashed a hole in the wall. Uhm.

...he's been hitting me hard enough to break _walls?_

What the actual hell? I'm finishing this now. Lunge. Oh, wait, he's turned around and – oooh hey pretty stars.

Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.

Uhm. I think he broke my jaw. I actually think – OH GOD, YES, SOMETHING WAS BROKEN. It's better now. Someone healed it. Explains the sudden burst of pain.

...

Hello Maribelle.

"Thanks, Maribelle." I muttered sheepishly. She just turned all of her attention on Chrom. Ignoring me still, huh?

"Prince Chrom." She hissed, wrapping her hands around her parasol to the point where I could hear the wood creaking in protest. "Must you insist on constantly destroying your practice areas?"

Oh, right, she technically owns the place or something. This might be a legitimate reason to be ignoring me right now rather than sheer spite.

Chrom opened his mouth to defend himself, and I made a quick exit...through the hole. Running.

Oh, wow, it's late now. Everyone's in the mess hall again, so I guess dinner. Remember to nod to Kellam on the way in.

Never.

Forget.

"What happened to you?" Sully asked in surprise. Oh, yeah, healing doesn't get rid of bruises.

"Chrom decided to spar with me. He knocked a hole in the wall and then broke my jaw, thankfully Maribelle was passing."

Most of the room winced in sympathy, and Stahl passed me a plate. Ooh, Mustard Pork, potatoes and carrots. This stuff's good.

Anyway, a thoroughly embarrassed Chrom comes back into the room with Maribelle, who insisted we behave more properly and due to mass amounts of fear we complied.

That woman is scary.

Still, I was sitting around a table, eating good food and enjoying good company. It was...odd. It almost felt like I was...well, not home, but like I somehow belonged here.

A few hours later, we helped clean up then went our seperate ways. Odd, why is my log out on my bed – OH GOD WHAT IF SOMEONE READ IT. Okay, rip out the first two pages and burn them in the small lamp next to the bed. Okay, that crisis is avoided. Wait...why does the third page have things on it?

Log Entry #3:

_So you don't remember how you got here, Outsider. Interesting. I'll be writing to you again soon._

_Your Friendly Neighborhood Alternate, _

_Lucien L'Allier. _

_PS: Have fun figuring out what I am without your memories. _

_PPS: Power comes with a cost, you idiot. Prepare to pay it. _

* * *

A/N: Character development and foreshadowing. Hope you enjoyed it.

EDIT 16/05/2013 - a few spelling errors corrected, not to mention a handful of added words and stuff. Also finally making all of the Lucian's into the 'canon' Lucien name.


	5. Chapter Four (Cam IV)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter Four – A Simple Walk**

* * *

Ugh, stupid blue void plaguing all of my dreams. Just go away will you?

Huh, a mirror, that's new. Wait...who the hell is reflected back at me? Odd, I don't wear white and red stupidly patterned clothing, and I'm sure as hell not left handed. Speaking of, I don't look like that and OH GOD HE STABBED ME AAGH-

Ow. Hello floor, how have you been? I've been fine. I could use less violent wake-up calls in my dreams, but either way...

Untangle myself from bed, go get dressed and clean my damn face. Huh, I must have forgotten to put my log away last night. Unless...no, there's no answer, so Lucian or whoever hasn't been messing with it. What did I write again?

* * *

Log Entry #4:

Who the hell are you, how did you get in my quarters and how the hell do you know who I am?  
What the hell is an Outsider?

What the hell is an Alternate?

What do you mean, power, I just got my ass kicked by Chrom and Sully! EXPLAIN THINGS MYSTERIOUS PERSON.

* * *

On second thoughts, I probably shouldn't have written that while in a panic. Still, if this Lucian does answer it might clear up a lot of things. I'm going to have to be a lot calmer in the coming weeks if I'm going to make it through this. Chrom's leaving later today, and we'll start going on patrols in teams of two. I ended up paired with Kellam. I _think_ Robin's logic was that I was the only one talking to him for most of the week and wouldn't end up forgetting him while wandering the countryside. Vaike's escorting Maribelle to her own estates, which of course means Sully and Stahl are off doing the long-distance missions because horses.

It seems these patrols are what Chrom was doing when he found me and Robin – week-long departures from the barracks to go looking for things and make sure no raids are happening. According to Robin's little speech yesterday, Kellam and I are going out to the west – away from Plegia, towards actual bandits – to do a little loop of a high-risk area and then come back in, rest for a week, and head out once more. Again and again and again until Chrom gets back.

Such joyous times we shall have.

Right now, though? One last spar with the Prince himself.

It's been going on for about five minutes, which is still longer than last time, and it helps that he avoided causing injury to me. According to him, I'm actually a lot better than some rookies he's trained over the years, and probably won't get hacked to shreds like my first two battles at this point. I really hope he's right.

Hey, we're going into the sixth min-KER-PLUNK.  
Ow. My head. Oh, hello familiar ceiling, how are you today?

Ugh, thanks for pulling me up Chrom.

"Nice try" He said encouragingly. "I've got to commend your rapid improvement."

_Power comes at a price, idiot. Prepare to pay it._

Um.

"I guess I've just had some good teachers." I shrugged. "Breakfast?"

Chrom blanched. "Uh, maybe not today."

...um?

"Why?" I asked, narrowing my eyes. He looked extremely stressed.

"lissa'scooking"

"...I'm sorry?"

"Lissa's cooking breakfast today." He said, slightly louder.

Oh. _oh_.

"On second thoughts we can eat on the road we can eat on the road can't we Kellam?"

Yeah, he was kind of standing right there watching for the whole thing. That happens more than you'd expect, no wonder he can reclass to Thief. Okay, Cameron stop. No metagaming.

No matter how temtping it would be to see Lucina!Morgan turn into Little Miss Death. Hmm, that sounds like a good idea, I wonder if I could engineer it – STOP IT YOU ALREADY SHIP IT.

Ugh.

Oh, hey, he's answering.

"Yes." Kellam agreed emphatically. "Yes we can. In fact, let's pack now and leave as soon as possible."

"That sounds like a magnificent idea." Agree. "I'll go get my things together."

Walk up to room, pass a sleepy-looking Stahl wandering into the kitchen – I probably should have warned him about breakfast, to be fair – wander into room.

Wait.

Why is my frigging log back on my bed, and opened?

* * *

Log Entry #5

_Ah Ah Ah_

_You didn't say the magic words._

_LLA_

* * *

I really do not need some mysterious asshole quoting Jurassic Park at me on top of the rest of my problems right now.

Ugh. I can't think about this right now. I'll just shove the stupid log in my bag with the clothes, tent and writing stuff. I'm clinging to that hobby like it is my last link to my last life, because it pretty much is.

ANYWAY back on target. I'm going to have to focus better. Still, let's get going I guess. Say goodbye to Chrom's crew.

Yeah, there they are lined up outside. Guess they're all saying goodbye to people they actually have connections to.

Now I feel alone again. Son of a – huh. Idea.

"Hey, Robin!"

Well, that got his attention. Let's run with this.

"Keep your Risen count running. Winner buys the whole company drinks for a _week_."

Oh, crap, Robin's face just split into a massive grin. "Where are you pulling that money from, Cameron?"

Oh, you cocky son of a – "You're gonna have to win to find out, smartass." I grumbled. Robin laughed and shook his head.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. Good luck."

Heh. Sure thing. "Don't die on me, Mate." I clapped his shoulder on the way past. "Otherwise Vaike'll have to start coming up with the plans, and then we are all screwed."

Yeah, that broke the ice with the rest of the group. Good luck guys, we shall see you later. Don't die, and try not to kill Lucina in the arena because that would be _bad_. Unbelievably, horribly bad. Ah well, at least I know I've got one really good friend to try and come back to.

Helps that he's, Y'know, the Avatar and therefor pretty much one of the most hilariously broken characters in Fire Emblem history. What was it that people on the Serenes Forest forums keep saying? 'because LolMU' or something like that. So yeah, Robin's not going to die because lol!MU. Right, time to get this show on the road!

* * *

The road goes ever ever on~

Over hills and under ~ OH FOR GOD'S SAKE THIS IS RIDICULOUS. Seriously, it's been six hours and we've just been slowly walking in one direction. It is the most boring thing I have ever done in my life. The only break we've even had was to actually eat breakfast, but it was just some bread rolls and jerky about two hours in, which is pathetic but probably still better than Lissa's cooking going from people's supports with her.

Cannot complain. Must appear to be some kind of badass. Just...just keep walking Cameron. Keep walking – oh, thank god, a village.

"Hey, Kellam!" I called out, knowing he was there even though I haven't seen him in five hours. "I don't suppose that would be our first stop, would it?"

Kellam peered over my shoulder at the small town. "Yes, that looks like it. We should be there in about an hour."

I...oh, right, I'm on top of a hill. We have to get down the hill and then walk to the village...yeah an hour sounds right. Dammit, fine.

I hate this job. Still, another hour's walking and we finally made it into the town and wait what the hell is Donnel doing here.

...this is not geographically sound.

"Halp! You gots to help us! I'm beggin' you, milord!"

Wait you can't see Kellam either? Are you serious Donnel?

"Woah there mate. Slow down a little." Well, now I have to deal with this nonsense. "What happened?"

"Cameron." Kellam said softly. "There's bandits heading our way."

Of course there are.

"Oy! There's the wee piglet!"

"Great, now we have to deal with these morons." I sighed, dropping my kitbag to the floor and loosening my sword in its sheath.

"Whassis? A little boy wanting to play hero? Haw haw ha-Aw."

Why yes dear idiot that is the mark of the exalt emblazoned on my shield now. Thank you for noticing.

"Damn! A Shephard!"

"Kellam, you seriously need to start considering a career in spying." I groan. Somehow the three of them haven't noticed the armored giant next to me.

"But no-one would notice when I try to give my reports." Kellam sighed. Well, the bandits are getting closer.

"Fair enough. Do you want to lead this or should I?"

Please don't say me please don't say me -

"You lead it, I've got your back."

-Son of a bitch. "Fair enough." Take a few steps forward. "Bandits, hear me! This village is under the protection of Prince Chrom and the Ylissean Shephards! You have two choices – Run and Live, or Fight and _Die_"

The bandits all glance at each other and run, screaming for reinforcements. Ah, crap.

"Okay, pal. I need you to tell me what happened before they come back and start resembling an actual threat." I muttered to Donnel.

"Y-yes, milord! Right away, milord!...Er, if it please your Graciousness"

"I don't have any titles, and neither does Kellam here" I sigh. "Look, just tell me your name already."

"Donny – Er, I mean, Donnel...your Shephardiness."

Are you _serious_?

"I live in this village just here, sir."

"You still haven't told me what happened, Donny!" Okay, Cameron, don't get mad. Just...just stay calm.

"Those rotten-toothed, pig-stinkin' bandit you just ran off attacked us!" He growled. Ugh, please stop following the game script, it's so annoying. "I'm the only one what got away, and even then just barely. They were roundin' up the others to haul 'em off to a bandit camp. Please, sir, you gots to help them! My ma's one of 'em, and...an' she's all I got in this world! Please!"

Oh, wow, those doe-eyes are impressive. Good work, Donnel.

"Cameron, the two of us aren't enough to get them back." Kellam muttered, frowning. "It'd be suicide."

Ugh, why do I have to make the decisions right now?

"I know, Kellam, but we can't just leave them there. We'd be failing in our duty. Ugh, we've got to think of something..." Think, Cameron, what would Robin do?

Heh.

WWRD. Kind of catchy. No! Focus!

Alright. "Do we have any way of contacting Stahl and Sully before they set out? They could be here in three hours if they ride hard." Please tell me there's a way to contact the actual leaders I don't want to have to deal with this.

Kellam shook his head. "We could send them a letter, but we don't have any Ravens to send them by."

Ravens? Seriously? Are we in Ylisse or the Seven Kingdoms? Oh dear god, I hope I'm not in some weird alternate reality where Fire Emblem is written by George RR Martin, because if that's where I am we are all going to die in assorted tragic manners.

We need more men somehow, we need more men somehow and – wait, is that Anna? Or, well, _an_ Anna?

That...that might work out.

"Ugh, nobody here? Unbelievable!" The red-haired woman kicked a stone while she led her pack mule over to us. "This is going to cut into my profits so badly!"

"Listen, lady, it's not safe around here." Cameron, hope this works you stupid stupid bastard this plan is stupid where did you come up with it? "All the villagers have been kidnapped, and - "

"Oh, really?" She brightened up. "My best customer's aren't dead? Hooray!"

...what.

"Listen, lady-"

"My name's Anna, dearie." Did she just _wink_ at me? "And don't worry, I can help get them back."

Um.

"Did you not hear what I just said?" Keep up the illusion, Cameron. "The area is crawling with bandits, it isn't safe to be here!"

Anna grinned at me. "You really think that a wandering merchant can't deal with a few bandits? That's just sweet deary." Oh, hey, I've never seen Anna's serious face before. "Listen, I didn't come here to lose money, I came here to _make_ money, and if that means taking down a bunch of bandits that were already cutting into my profits then that's what I'm going to do."

...insert Final Fantasy Victory Theme here?

"Well, fine." I sigh, rolling my shoulders. "Hey, Kellam. Is three of us enough to get the job done if we plan right?"

"Four." Um, Donnel what are you doing? "Ah know where they've taken camp, and I can fight too! My paw taught me how 'afore the bandits killed him last time!"

...what.

"I guess that no man's born a warrior, Donny." I sigh. "Just make sure to leave most of the heavy fighting to us, alright?"

Donnel grinned at us. Wow, that's a lot of teeth you have there young man. "Ah owe ya!"

Alright, then. This is a ragtag band of misfits going to save a bunch of distressed innocents. The laws of narrative dictate that we shall succeed flawlessly and what am I even saying.

"Right. We're going to sneak up on them when dark falls in about an hour, everyone get some rest. Anna, if you're a merchant then find Donny here something to fight with."

Oh, wow, that's a death glare. "I don't give people things for _free_"

Um.

"I'll cover the cost, just...just make sure he knows how to use it." I sighed. "Please?"

Anna's glare changed to a smile and...a wink? Oh, right, I'm dealing with Anna. Why is my face hot now?

"Don't worry dearie, I'll make sure he can take good care of himself!"

Well, she's wandered off. Kellam's sitting on a rock counting javelins, so I might as well...why is my log not in my bag? Huh, there it is over by that rock. Oh, damn it, seriously?

* * *

Log Entry #6

_THIS_

_IS_

_STUPID_

_LLA_

* * *

Well, it's good to know we agree on something Lucien. Even though I have no clue how you managed to get it out of my bag and escape without me noticing.

* * *

A/N: Ugh. This should have happened faster but I had a script due Friday so OH WELL. Tired now. Sleeping.

EDIT 16/05/2013: For the most part I left this chapter alone and tightened the wording up a bit, as well as catching a few spelling mistakes.


	6. Chapter Five (Cam V)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter Five – From Zero...**

* * *

Log Entry #7

Are you here to help?

Please respond.

- Cameron

* * *

"Cameron. Wake up."

Ngh.

"It's time to head out."

Ughublah.

"Cameron...Sully's cooking."

OH GOD NO SOMEONE STOP HER

Huh. It's dark. Oh...right. This idiocy is what's happening right now. "Thanks, Kellam."

The armor knight smiled kindly and pulled me up. "Don't mention it. You drifted off after writing something down, we let you sleep for a bit."

Okay, right. I'm about to lead a team of four men, including myself, on a raid against an entire damn bandit camp. Because, y'know, I'm stupid that way. Seriously, how did I ever come up with this plan?

Oh, yeah, because Donnel has doe eyes and Anna ended up in the right place at the right time. From what I can figure out, this is some kind of fusion of the first few paralogues – Donnel is here, Anna is passing by and decides to help protect a village, and you lead an attack on a bandit fort while recruiting Anna. I just wish that I had more people than myself, Donnel, Anna and Kellam. Still, I suppose I can try to muscle through it somehow. Which is why I am now crawling through the mud and looking at a dark, broken down fort with a bunch of civilians in the middle.

This is what I signed up for – god, it sounds like a bad Spec Ops movie. Or some of the worse Tom Clancy novels...back on track, Cameron.  
Groan.

"Alright, Kellam. I count six on the west side." I mutter. "About three more to the east. Easiest way in would be the south, with only two, but that's the one with a decent wall."

Donnel frowned. "What about the north?"

I followed Donnel's gaze towards the north, and closest, side. "Too risky, that's the main gate so it's lit up really well. We're going to have to risk the east, there's only three."

Sigh.

"We need to get in over the wall, free the civilians and have some kind of distraction while they escape."

Anna giggled and pulled out...something from the basket of supplies she brought. "I might have a solution for that..."

Oh, no way.

"Is that a..." Impossible. There's no...how would you...  
Anna grinned at me. "Yep. It's a firework."

...

WHAT?!

Wait, calm down. If you can have fireworks in Lord of the Rings then its not too far gone for it to be in Fire Emblem. Damn, though.

"I always wondered how those work." I asked slowly. Anna smirked.

"A mage pushes a little magic into it, and like a magic card it explodes with powder inside for color."

Oh, hey, magic cards are in Ylisse? Cool. Frigging useless, but cool nonetheless.

"Interesting. So...will that make a big enough bang to keep us covered?" I asked. Kellam frowned.  
"You're a mage?" Good job missing the point, Kellam.

Anna rolled her eyes at him. "I can heal people, use cards and launch fireworks, what more do you want from me?"

Awesome, this could work.

"Okay. Donnel and I will sneak in over the East side, go in and free the prisoners. Anna, help us take out those three and then run back. As soon as you see us reach the center, launch the fireworks right at the west wall."

Kellam frowned even deeper than previously. "What about me?"

"Around five seconds after the fireworks hit, I want you to attack and clear the front gate for the villagers to make it back to town. Team up with us afterwards, we'll deal with the rest then."

This...this might work. Everyone else seems to think so.

"Everyone clear?" Please say yes. Oh thank god, nods all around. "Okay, Kellam go get ready."

Breathe steady. Kellam's probably made it back to the front gate by now. Donnel's gripping a slightly more elegant version of the Bronze lance – probably forged – that Anna's probably going to charge me ludicrous amounts for. Anna's whistling to herself, flipping a steel sword over in her hand. Alright, let's get going. Stand up, motion for them to follow, move slowly towards the east wall. In position. Signal a halt. Okay, two of them are talking next to a campfire while the third is wandering around. Draw sword slowly.

Damn, the sound it makes coming out of the sheath is oddly satisfying. Okay, here comes the bandit towards Anna's position...nod.

Anna sprung forward, put a hand around the bandit's mouth, jerked his head back and slit his throat. She pulled the convulsing corpse into a nearby bush until she was sure he was dead.

"'Ey, Jim? Where'dya go?" One of the bandits muttered, wandering over. He's closest to me...careful...where's the other one? Right behind him. Okay. Jump out swinging, decapitate – wait. Oh god, there's blood everywhere this is really disturbing ugh. The last one's just standing there, shell-shocked or something, when Donnel manages to ram a lance into his throat, turning his warning into a wet gurgle. Donnel stood there in shock. I sympathize killing really isn't easy. I've still crammed my first one into the back of my head with other repressed incidents such as what's happening to my family STOP THINKING ABOUT IT. Okay.

I'm back. Put hand on Donnel's shoulder.

"Donnel, it's okay. The first is always the hardest." I mutter, squeezing his shoulder. "But we have to go and rescue your ma now, okay?"  
Donnel nods shakily, and pulls his spear out. Blood bubbled from the hole in the bandits throat. Ugh, I'm glad its dark or that would be a thousand times worse.

"Ah'm fine." He whispered, standing up slowly. "Let's ge' goin'."

Brave lad. Christ, what am I saying, he's probably only two years younger than me or something. Let's just...let's just move on shall we?

Anna's heading back. We bumped into a few more bandits, but nothing I couldn't handle seeing as they were one by one. Eventually we managed to get into the courtyard, and Donnel signaled for them to be quiet. Pulling out a small knife, he began rapidly hacking away at the ropes while I glanced around, wondering where the distraction was.

Donnel moved over to me. "They're all free." He whispered. "Ah told them to act natural until you give the'order to run."

"Arright." I mutter. Wow, this is tense. I hope it goes well. "It should be any second now..."

Anna, seriously it would be nice to have it right about now-THANK YOU.

A red streak flew towards the east wall, where it exploded in a shower of green sparks. I pointed towards the gates. "NOW! RUN!"

The thirty-something villagers rose to their feet and ran as fast as they could, myself in the lead. Kellam finished off the last bandit just in time, and I pulled myself to a stop next to him.

"Alright, we're going to have to hold off the rest now." I sighed. Kellam groaned and passed me a waterskin. I waved Donnel on, barking at him to make sure the rest get back, and took a long drink before standing straight and looking at the huh that's a lot.

There's about ten of them now. This isn't going to be fun. Anna bounced down next to us. "So...three each?" She asked cheekily. "You owe me a bonus if I take out the last one!"

...

Anna please don't turn into a huge gambler. My wallet can't take that abuse, it's still recovering from buying this game in the first place. Sigh.

"Fair enough. I'll take the center. Kellam?"

Kellam nodded and pulled a javelin from its spot in the ground, launching it hard and fast, slamming through one bandit and impaling his corpse to the fort walls. One down, at least. He readied his lance and OH GOD THEY'RE HERE.

Push initial one back with shield, stab in the chest. Dammit, sword's stuck, what did Chrom always say? It's, like...damn, I forget.

Wait, I read this in a book once. It was for bayonets, but...slide the blade laterally, then pull it out. Oh, hey, it works. Thanks, Dan Abnett! The next person who tells me that Military Sci-Fi books have no purpose in life will get punched in the face because of you!

One down. The other two. Block one's axe, parry the others. Use the momentum from the parry to slash the first one across the chest – damn, not lethal. He's flinching, turn and block the second one's swing. Slash – he caught my sword. Clever boy. Smash his face with the shield, nose broken and sword is free – MY BACK!

Ugh. My back's only grazed, thank god for that chainmail Chrom got me. Never taking that off, I swear. Smash the one I'm fighting again, and he's down. Turn to deal with this asshole. Sidestep, sidestep, decapitate.

Oh, god, his head was only half cut off. That is disgusting.

Gah.

Focus, one left. Oh, hey, hand axe. Guess he's the leader ARGH. Painpain. Painhotpain. Ugh.  
My poor right collarbone, why must you take so much abuse for me?

Can't focus. Seeing stars. Anna's pinned down, and Kellam just had his lance broken and then knocked out. Ugh.

Javelin? Who...Donnel. Heh. The javelin didn't go far into the boss' body, but it drove through his leg and forced him to stop.

Alright, let's go and help him take out the - crap, my sword arm is useless. Donnel runs pass me, waving Kellam's last spare javelin. Don't be an idiot, kid-

Oh. Wow. The boss just tried to step forward, but put weight on his wounded leg. He sank to his knees, and Donnel rammed the spear through his throat and out his lower back. Ugh. Disgusting.

"That was fer...my paw..." Donnel panted, sinking to his knees and sweat glistening down his face. He then passed out. Wonderful. Anna finished off her last one and walked over to me with a healing staff.

"You owe me 600 for weapons, 1200 for fireworks and 50 for healing." She said matter-of-factly as she fixed my shoulder. Ugh, there's the resetting. I'll never get used to that.

"Shut up and check on Kellam." I muttered. Anna shook her head.

"There's something I want to talk to you about first." She said, all serious. "One of my sisters guards an Outrealm gate. She said someone fell through one day."

Um. What?  
"She tried to look after him, but he said something about needing to find someone and stole her raft."  
I remember none of this.  
I opened my mouth to inquire more, but-

"He was called Lucien. You've been talking to him somehow, I saw your log." Her eyes narrowed. "He owes my sister two thousand gold."

...oh. Not me.

Wonderful? I think?

I groan and stand up straight. "I don't even know how he writes in the log, woman. Seriously, responses just show up. I don't know who he is or what he wants from me."

Anna looked suspicious until I pulled the log out. There was a new entry already.

* * *

Log Entry #8

_Help? BWAHAHAHAHHAAAA – no._

_LLA_

* * *

"That wasn't there earlier." Anna whispered. "It must be a..."  
Another message formed. Oh, that's how he writes in it when it's at the bottom of my bag...

* * *

_PS: Selling me out to an Anna? Seriously? Wow, you need to find different ways to impress girls._

* * *

"...Two-way book." Anna smiled. "I thought so. You might want to hang on to that."

"The hell is a two-way book?" I asked. Anna shrugged.

"Whatever you write in one book appears in the other, and the book makes itself obvious somehow."

I pale. "The book is _alive_?!"

Anna shook her head. "No, it'll just appear obvious. It just wants to be read, its not actual sentience."

Ugh, this is confusing. Fine, I'll hang onto it, although if it starts acting like Riddle's diary from Harry Potter I'm setting it on fire then dumping the ashes in three different oceans.

I groan. "Okay, fine. Please keep it a secret from the rest, I still need to figure out what Lucien wants."

Anna smiled. "As long as you get that gold out of him when you meet, my lips are sealed." She chirped, finally leaning over Kellam to heal him. Well that's an unnecessary complication. At least I know I didn't come through an outrealm gate I guess. The person he needs to find is probably me, or maybe someone else. But that beggars the question...why? Why is he so determined with mocking me? Is he the price I had to pay to not suck? What can he do? Who the hell is he?

Ugh, too many questions. Time to trek back to the village. Guess Kellam's carrying Donnel.

Anna packed up her stuff and we set out to go back to the village. I decided to have some light conversation with Kellam on the way.

"What should we do now?"

Kellam shrugged. "I vote for heading back to the barracks, getting some rest and resupplying."  
Oh..."...that sounds amazing." I groan. "I could use a decent night's sleep after this."

Kellam grinned at me. "You and I both."

Anna sighed. "Me too. Are your beds comfy?"

Um.

We just sort of turned to her, incredulous looks on our faces. Anna shrugged.

"What? I've studied the shepherds, you don't have anyone who knows prices like I do. If you take me on, I'll cut down the amount you spend on weapons by a lot."

I don't want to deal with this right now. "You'll have to talk to Prince Chrom about that." I sigh. "Although if I'm any indication he'll probably take you on just because you volunteered. For now, though, consider yourself in."

Anna grinned. Wow, that's a lot of teeth. We made it back into the village when the sun was starting to rise again. I'm exhausted and covered in blood, and I wish I had a dog to lick it off me like in Dragon Age Origins or something. The old man whom I shall assume is the mayor steps forwards to thank me, and I zone out most of the speech. It's the basic 'thank you brave heroes' speech you'd expect to find in a video game sidequest.

"...if there is anything you desire, please say so."

Anna's eyes lit up. "Well-"

"No." I said firmly, heading her off. Anna scowled at me.

"I was just going to-"

"No."

"Just a little-"

"No."

"I'm sure they won't miss a few hundred-"

"NO, Anna. As your senior shepherd I tell you no."

Anna frowned and kicked a rock. Kellam chuckled.

"You seem to be adapting to this leadership thing pretty quickly."

I fix him with a flat look. "Chrom cannot get back fast enough, I hate this job."

In the end, all we accepted was for some of the village women to scrub our armor, some provisions and sleep. Glorious, glorious sleep. Waking up dead early the next day, I do a brief headcount before setting home.

Why are there four of us.

"Donnel! Go home!" I say, already resigned to the fact that he's probably coming anyway because game events. Donnel shook his head.

"Naw! I asked the elder and my ma, they said ah should do what I felt was right!"

"And what you think is right is following a group of strangers through hostile territory and being subjected to fierce military training for the rest of your life." Kellam said flatly. Nice sense of humor there, Kellam.

Donnel screwed his face up. "If ah hadn't been there, ye'd be dead!"

Oh don't you be that guy right now.

"I'm askin' ye! Please, I wanna be a hero!"

And so you shall because Sol is broken in this game. "...fine. We'll check with Chrom when he gets back." I groan and turn away. Anna tugged her considerably lighter pack horse – she'd sold some stuff to the villagers after all – after us, smirking. Time to head home, I guess.

Heh, home. It's odd to call the barracks that, but it is now I guess. It's the second weirdest thing to happen to me on this trip, the other is the constant hero worship I got from the villagers yesterday.

I can't stop myself from humming while we walk. From zero to he~ro, in no time flat...I miss Disney movies. And Inception. Dammit, I hadn't gotten the chance to see Django Unchained yet...

* * *

A/N: Well, that's Cameron's trial by fire done with, as well as the paralogues that are actually important. Next chapter is reunion with the other Shephards and actual plot progression. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to write Chrom's reaction to finding out Lucina and Robin are engaged for Time Matters Not.

SHAMELESS SELF-PLUGGING FOR THE WIN

EDIT 16/05/2013: Some extra clarification for the plan, more continuity edits, spelling and grammar checks.


	7. Chapter Six (Cam VI)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter Five – ...to Hell**

* * *

This is a long frigging walk. To be perfectly honest, looking back it seems we spent more time going downhill than we did uphill, so guess what we're doing now!

"Can we...tak' a break?" Donnel asked, panting. To be fair, we had just crested this hill that's about five hours away from home. Still, it'll be useful to get my thoughts together before we get back.

"Sure. Kellam, we're taking a break for half an hour." I sigh, slumping against a large boulder and unsealing my canteen. It's fairly hot today, too, which doesn't help. Kellam opted to sink into the ground on the other side of the boulder, while Donnel just collapsed where he was and sighed.

"Thank ye..."

"Yes, thank me." I sighed. "Don't expect to get breaks when you meet up with the people who are meant to be in charge. Frederick would just tell us that we'd have a break after we get there, it's only another five hours."

Kellam chuckled and removed the over sized pauldrons of his armor, rolling his shoulders with a disturbing crack. "It feels good to get that off."

"I can imagine." I nodded, thankful for the fact that all I need to wear is the chain mail with the tunic over it. Anna, in all her red-and-yellow glory, sat on top of the rock after tying her horse to the ground. It's actually not that dumb an idea to keep tent pegs for that purpose.

"I'm glad I don't have to wear armor at all." She smirked, crossing her legs. "I don't let them hit me."

"I'm sure you don't." I groaned. "To be fair, it's not like I allow them to hit me, they just do."

"You might want to work on that." She simpered. I shot a glare at her, sword hand twitching. Oh god, don't turn into Owain. Seriously, that would be disturbing as hell, not to mention hard to explain when he shows up and people think he's quoting me or something.

"You might want to work on finishing your opponents. Because you were still tied up, you ended up healing me, which cost me money that...you...got..." You have to be kidding me. "...you magnificent _bitch_."

"And the penny drops." Anna said with a smirk. That's...quite horrifying.

"I could have _died_!"

"You wouldn't, you're tougher than that." Anna shrugged. "Besides, their leader was drunk. Didn't you notice?"

"Way ta make ma revenge less satisfyin'." Donnel grumbled from the grass. "Tha's a lot less impressive if he was drunk."

"You know what?" I frown. "Anna, never play with people's lives again. Some things are more important than money."

"I doubt that." Anna sighed. "But sure."

"Also, break's over, let's get moving." I hauled to my feet. Donnel frowned.

"But it's only been ten minutes!"

"And my mood's been ruined, the sooner I can get home and beat the crap out of a training doll the better." I shot back. "Come on, it's only five hours!"

Kellam snapped his pauldrons back on and was already halfway down the other side of the hill by the time we'd gotten our act together. Donnel was dashing down, not wanting to be left behind, while Anna...Anna was odd. Way to go, Cameron, you messed up big time with this one.

"Are you alright?" I asked slowly. Anna shook her head and sighed.

"I'm fine. Don't worry about it!" She flashed a grin at me. "I promise not to put you in danger any more, okay?"

"No matter how much money it would get you?" I joked. Anna just smirked and started walking.

"Well, there's a point where I'd start considering it..." She trailed off. Well, fine. Point: Anna.

"I hope it's at least four digits of gold." I grumbled, walking after them.

* * *

You know, after that debacle, I was expecting to get back home and be greeted normally, have a bit of a break, and then do other stuff for a while, then for the plot to catch up with me.

I did not expect to open the door to see Ricken desperately trying to figure out how a healing staff works while an unconscious Vaike was bleeding from a few dozen places on a cleared table. Once again, the powers-that-be conspire against me it would seem.

Oh, right, authority figure mode. "Anna, get over there and help" I snapped, waving the woman forwards. Ricken turned to me – oh, wow, kid, you look exhausted.

"Cameron! Thank Naga you're back." He sighed, sinking into a chair. Donnel hovered by the door uncertainly while Kellam resumed his usual position in a corner, looking concerned. Well, I'm awake now at least.

"Ricken, what the hell happened?" I know damn well what happened I should have seen this coming you stupid overconfident fool.

Ricken rubbed his face and looked up at me. "Maribelle's estates were under attack by Plegians posing as bandits. She tried to talk them down, but got captured. Vaike tried to rescue her, but got badly hurt and barely managed to make it back here with Maribelle's horse."

Naturally.  
"Damn it. Were they even trying to pretend?" I cursed, dumping my sword in the corner. Ricken shook his head wearily.

"Not really. Enough so that we wouldn't be able to prove it, but...it was definitely Army troops." Ricken groaned. "Vaike could rip through a couple of bandits easily."

I gave the wall an ill-tempered kick. "Damn it! Where are Sully and Stahl?"

"They came back an hour before you. Stahl went to inform the Exalt, while Sully went to tell Chrom."  
I rubbed my forehead and stared off into space. "With any luck, he'll be allied with Ferox by now. Agh, we can't afford to wait for them to get back. Anna, how's Vaike holding up?"

She looked up from her work, casting aside one exhausted Mend staff and grabbing the second from her pack. "He'll be fine, he just fainted from blood loss and shock. The injuries themselves are superficial, but I'm not an expert."

I still can't get used to serious!Anna. "Right, then. How long until he's up and running again?"

Anna bit her lip and muttered under her breath. "...maybe three hours?"  
I nodded to myself and tried to run some figures through my head. "Okay. Okay. Right. People, we've got a three hour break. Get your stuff together and be ready to march, we're going after Maribelle."

Reckless reckless reckless this is so reckless stop diverging form the path so much you fool. Think logically, wait for reinforcements, the game progression will be the same no it won't it changed the paralogues to all one location so it's not guaranteed they might hurt her we can take that chance no we can't yes we can no we can't yes we can no we can't-

"We can't take this risk." Kellam protested.  
"YES WE CAN!" Oh, wow, I just smashed a plate. "Kellam, we are _not_ leaving one of our own behind when we could have done something."  
Kellam shook his head. "It's too risky-"  
"SOD THE RISKS! Kellam, we owe it to her to go and save her stupid, stuck-up noble arse, so if you could PLEASE just SHUT UP and let me THINK FOR A MINUTE!"

Dead quiet. Okay, breathe in and out.

"Anyone who wants to come with me to save her go get your stuff. Anna, are you done with-"  
Anna nodded her head. "He should wake up soon."  
"Excellent. Pack lightly if you're coming, we need to move fast." I dunk a cloth into a bucket of water and wipe my face. Focus, Cameron, stop being controlled by emotions. This is critical. "Who's coming?"

Kellam, hesitantly, volunteered. Ricken, unsurprisingly, jumped at the chance, the same as Donnel. Wait, where's Anna?

"Sorry, what were we voting on?" The redhead asked as she came back in. "I was just checking my inventory to see if there was anything good for us to use when we go save Mirabel."

"Maribelle." Ricken corrected swiftly.

"Yeah, her." Anna shrugged. I grin.

"Is there?"  
"Oh, plenty." She pulls out a bundle of swords, lances and axes that I eagerly reach out for. She pulls them back. "Two thousand gold."

Are you _kidding me_ Anna? Ugh, that'll clear out the purse I landed here with. I think. Can't be bothered counting it.

"Just take the damn pouch." I grumbled, tossing it at her. "Great, now I'm broke."

And there's that stupid smile that makes me flush again. "Alright, someone write a note. Tell Chrom that we're going after Maribelle, but not attacking because that would be _stupid_. We'll come up with a new plan later."

The looks of relief on pretty much everyone's faces confirmed that I appeared to be acting like a raging bull in a china shop earlier. Well then. Two hours of sleep waiting for Vaike to wake up it is.

* * *

Log Entry #9  
_This is stupid_

Shut up, Lucian.

_No, seriously, this is a stupid plan_

What do you care?

_I don't know if you've noticed, but I do have some concern for your welfare._

For reasons as of yet unexplained.

_Oh to hell with you too. I can't just care?_

You still haven't told me what the hell you are, so no.

_Ugh, fine, be that way you stupid Outsider. _

What the hell is an Outsider?

_Use that brain you were so damn proud of._

Ah. An Outsider is someone from outside this dimension?

_An Outsider is a Self-Insert, you idiot._

So I actually am in a bad fanfic?

_I chose a term you'd be familiar with for a reason, and that reason was not so you could taunt me._

Sorry, just stressed

_Understandable. Not forgiven though. Any more questions?_

What's an Alternate?

_What?_

That's what you called yourself, right? My Alternate?

_I'm done talking. - LLA_

* * *

Well THAT conversation was completely useless. Slam the book shut and stuff it in my pack. Time to leave, Vaike woke up an hour ago. Let's hope this goes well.

The trek took us the better part of two hours on borrowed horses. Ricken managed to give us a rough guide, and once we were in Maribelle's estates Donnel managed to pick up a trail. I guess tracking animals is a useful skill in combat too, actually.

"Nice work, farm boy!" Vaike grinned. Donnel seemed to be in some kind of wierd mix of embarassed, annoyed and proud. Mostly proud.

"Focus, people. They've got a twelve-hour head start at this point, but they're a bigger band and not mounted." I caution. "We should be able to catch them, but we want to stay behind."

It was getting dark by the time we caught our first look at them. On the side of a hill, at a campsite...surrounded by other fires. Damn.

"I count twenty-three fires." Anna hissed, folding away her – well, the Shepherd's now, we had a discussion about her property on the way here – telescope. "That means-"  
Ricken moaned. "The whole Plegian army's there."

Well, bollocks.

"Not all of it." Anna shook her head. "I'd say there's ten men to a fire."

"Two hundred and thirty men are way too many for us to deal with, Anna." I mutter. "We need to come up with something smart."

* * *

...or, as it turns out, unbelievably stupid. Grimacing, I spat out the mouthful of dirt I'd gotten from Anna shoving my face into the ground.

"I found this one wandering around your camp." She grinned. "I heard Gangrel pays well."

"Kehahaha!"

And there's the son of a bitch himself. Must...resist...temptation...to try and kill him now...Ugh, first impression is that's an ugly boot. Damn, that's not a hand pulling me upwards that feels more like a frigging _claw_. Wow, you're ugly. Get a haircut and learn some basic fashion sense, man, it'll make a better first impression! What, are you trying to scream 'Evil King' everywhere you go on purpose or something?

"And what do we have here? A little lost lamb?"

Screw you too, Gangrel. I'm making sure you die, and sod the Bonus Maps.

"Listen, you freak." I say very calmly. "The answer to your question lies in a simple set of steps: You give me my friend back, let us go, and then leave our god-damn country and listen to our peace offer-OOF."

Yeah, ouch. I forgot that Gangrel's actually really tough. Ugh. Christ. Well, that's a sure sign my pain tolerance has improved. I barely feel any pain in my gut, even though he sucker-punched it.

"A little lost lamb with a mouth on him, then." Gangrel hummed to himself. "Pahh, throw him in with the other one."

"Hey!" Anna protested. "What about my money?"

You really don't need to act that much when there's money on the line, do you? Well, I hope he offers less than four digits of gold or otherwise she might actually take him up on the offer.

"Kehaha. You'll get paid after tomorrow, we've got a deal to cut. Make sure they don't escape until then."

Gangrel you slime I'm going to rip you limb from limb one of these days I swear – THUNK.

* * *

I wake up to someone pushing me desperately.

Oh, hey Maribelle.

"What on earth were you thinking?" She protested, sighing in...relief? Don't get soft on me Maribelle.

"Rescuing you." I grunt. Maribelle glares.

"By getting captured?"

"I'll admit, phase one of the plan is fairly stupid. So is phase two and three. Altogether though, I find they make a picture of great ingenuity."

Maribelle stared at me in disbelief. Hey, I'm telling the truth here woman, don't knock me for it.

"Look, there is actually something resembling a plan here. Now, if you'll excuse me I think Anna was a bit **overenthusiastic**" Yeah, I hope you heard that from outside the tent you money-obsessed psycho "With the **beatings**"

Maribelle looked at me with dawning comprehension. "You _wanted_ to get-"

"Stop talking before you give it away!" I hissed quietly. She shut up. "Anna's one of the new Shepherd's I ended up recruiting while we were out, she's great with disguises and stuff like that. I came up with a really stupid plan involving her bluffing her way into the guards for tomorrow and me getting captured."

There was a brief pause.

"From this point on, I'm going to let Robin come up with all the crazy bullcrap." I mutter. "I'm getting a headache trying to keep my own plan straight in my head."

Maribelle bit her lip and looked away. "imsorry."

"What?"

Maribelle cleared her throat. "I'm sorry for how I treated you."

Well that was unexpected. "Save the apologies for later, Mari. We've got to get out of this first."

And all signs of forgiveness are gone. "_What_ did you call me?"

"Um..."

"How..._dare_ you refer to someone above your station in such a way?" She's really angry, isn't she. "You...I...**unbelievable!**"

"Unbelievable?" Sod it, I'm tearing into her. "You did something stupid, so I had to do something even more stupid to save your overbearing stuck-up ass! I think I'm entitled to one pet name, _Mari_!"

I am so glad our hands are bound because I'm pretty sure she'd try to scratch my eyes out at this point. Anna stuck her head in.

"I don't mean to interrupt, but...could you not yell?" She begged quietly. "You know, before the other guards make true on their promise to kill you?"

We shut up and resorted to glaring at each other. Anna sighed and went back outside. It's going to be a long night...

* * *

A/N: Bit shorter than usual, but for some reason I really like writing Maribelle. I'll get the next chapter up by Wednesday, and for those of you who care there should be a new Time Matters Not up on Sunday or Monday.  
Oh, yeah.

And thanks for almost 50 follows, you guys are awesome. Wait, now I have to entertain ~50 people on a semi-tight schedule.

...

Dammit.

- G2G

EDIT 16/05/2013: The entire first segment was added, for the purpose of serving as a 'C Support' with Anna. Added about 500 words to the chapter, too, bringing up to average length. Also expanded on the meeting with Gangrel. After that, the typical spelling, continuity and grammar changes were made.


	8. Chapter Seven (Cam VII)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter Six – Everything bad happens**

"So here we are again~It's always such a pleasure."

Maribelle stared at me incredulously. "_Why_ are you _singing_?"

"Keeping my spirits up." I said brightly. "No point in getting depressed."

Something just slammed into the back of my head. Ow.

You know, this scene would be a lot more dramatic if I could actually tell what Gangrel, Emmeryn and Chrom were saying down there. Stupid realism.

"I don't suppose any of you fine gentlemen can tell me what's going on?" Four guards in total, along with Anna. Easy enough fight once the crap hits the fan.

I hope. They are trained soldiers, not random bandits. The advantage of surprise may be needed to help deal with them.

And that's another ax haft to the ribs. Fine, be that way. Jerks. Ugh, I hate this plan. Why am I so stupid?

"Shut up." One snarled.

Well, people just drew their swords. Time for action son.

Three troops approach Emmeryn, Chrom cuts one down, Gangrel's laughing...

"Showtime." I mutter to Anna. Gangrel waves his men forwards, the Ylissian army surrounds Emmeryn...Oh, crap. I forgot about Aversa. She interferes here doesn't she.

Yeah, that's a dangerous looking dark magic spell being charged up. Son of a-

Wait why did everything go green.

Elwind. Right. Ricken. Good.

"Anna! Now!"

The four guards turned in confusion as Anna smirked and lashed out, cutting my ropes. Stand up, catch shield.

Sword. Where's the sword.

"Where's my sword?"

Anna managed to spare me a brief glance from not dying to the four guys. "I kinda forgot!"

Son of a-Right. Fine. Aversa's overpowering Ricken, we need to get out of here now. One axeman. Shield to face.

Why oh why do people never think that a giant piece of metal is actually quite a good weapon in and of itself?

Grab knife from floor, cut Maribelle loose. Anna tossed her a staff.

"Oh, you remembered the things for _her_?" Angry. Confused. Panicking. Ricken's unconscious body just landed next to us, and Maribelle started healing.

...Aversa looks pissed.

Son of a _bitch_

"Anna, get Maribelle and Ricken down the cliff, I'll hold her."

Disbelief. "You're an idiot."

"Hey, it's been working for me so far." Grin. _THISISSTUPID_. Ready shield on dominant hand for a change. "Trust me."

Anna looks nervous but does it anyway. "You are _so_ paying me extra for putting up with this."

"Me? Chrom's back. I'm not in charge of your paycheck. Talk to the guy with the cape that, despite all logic, is perpetually billowing heroically in the wind." A fact of which I am truly grateful. Anna pulled Ricken onto her back and started running,

Maribelle behind her. So, what stupid situation did I put myself in this time OH GOD.

Right. I just dodged that. That rock used to exist, now it does not. This was a stupid plan. Stupid stupid stupid stupid.

Block the next blast with shield, wince and wait for the pain.

...

What? Oh come on, is this thing made of Adamantium or something? It just won't break!

Temptation to become a Fire Embelm version of Captain America is overwhelming. Use common sense.

...Common sense apparently betrayed me, because I just threw the shield at her head. Wait, did it hit? Awesome! Get it back before I die.

Dive after it. Roll past another throw. Grab it. Oh god I only just blocked that one. Damn.

Shit. Hands are sweating. This is the closest I've ever been to dying, I just sent away the healers. Which was also stupid. If one of those things hit me I'm dead. Time to start bluffing my way out of it.

"Well then, Aversa." Ugh. Don't get distracted by the sexy. Christ, woman, put some clothes on already. "How's Validar?"

That seemed to work. "How do you...?"

"Oh, I know a lot of things." Cameron don't try that. That's a stupid plan do you _want_ dashed against the cliffs?

Aversa's gathering power but isn't launching it. "Then do you-"

"I don't know why someone would want to wake up a giant Lovecraftian horror dragon that will devour the world or something like that" I say casually "But I do have to give him props for a pretty impressive plan. Pity he can't think on his son's level."

Aversa's pretty much dumbstruck from the sheer amount of knowledge-I-should-not-have I just dropped on her.

"So..." Okay I might be able to negotiate my way out of here.

Oh, wait, now she's angry. Wait, did she just gather more power? Holy shit, that looks like Ereshkigal. How the hell does she know that spell? Isn't that from Rekka no Ken?

"You know far too much."

_**CRAP**_

Yeah, I can't dodge that. Hope to block – oh thank god it blocked wait now I'm going backwards. I'm on a cliff. Oh, hey, that's an interesting rush of air I wonder what that means shit I'm falling off a cliff.

No no no no no no no no-I'm not falling anymore.

"That was incredibly reckless." Well, who's this. Prim. Formal. Female. Blonde. Oh, right, sacrificial lion Falcon Knight lady.

"I'm sorry." Ugh. Vertigo's kicking in. Stupid fear of heights. "But I don't deal well with heights, ma'am, so if you could please return me to a stable ledge and _then_ scold me?"

Light chuckles. It really was a shame she got killed off, she was a decent character. What's her name again...?

Oh thank god the ground. Ugh. I hate flying. Sweet sweet earth how I missed you for a few minutes.

"What was that meant to be?"

Oh screw you too Robin. "That was...me...improvising."

Robin looked completely baffled. "And you said that _Vaike's_ plans were bad?"

"In my defense..." Breathe, Cameron, breathe. "...getting blasted off the mountain was not in the plan."

It looked like Robin wanted to say more, but the sacrificial lion intervened. "Robin, we are in a battle and need your directions." She looks annoyed. Huh, probably shouldn't distract the genius.

"Right." Robin muttered, getting back up. "What's the situation look like?"

"Two hundred thirty to two hundred fifty soldiers." Huh, looks of surprise. "Maybe a few elite guard, but they probably quit the field with Gangrel."

"How do you-"

"I spend the night in their camp and DIDN'T do recon? What kind of plan is that?" Heh, that makes him look embarrassed Point to me! "Oh, also, a bunch of Wyvern riders are gonna show up soon. You might want to deal with that."

Robin started scrawling on a piece of paper. Probably brainstorming. "Right. Phila-"  
THAT'S THE NAME!  
"-I need the Falcon Knights to run interception on those Wyvern Riders. Cameron, are you up to fighting?"

uhm.

"Maybe?" I offer weakly. Robin passed me a sword. Ooh, Steel! Nice! Weapon rank up!

"I need you to get a message to Kellam and the Armored company, tell them to line up here." He gestured to a bottleneck between the forests. "I'm going to send out the archers and myrmidons to take out anything that enters the forest."

Alright, Robin's planning stuff and it sounds good. "Got it. I'll head there now."

"Good. Oh, and Cameron?"

"Hm?"

"Twenty-three"

...

SON OF A BITCH.

"I owe all the shepherds a drink then." Oh god. This is expensive. "...or I get twelve more in the next few hours."

Chuckling. "Good to see you too, Cameron."

"Piss off, mate. I've got to try and not make my wallet weep any more."

Split in different directions. Phila took off to the sky to go and do pegasus knight things. Okay, there's Kellam.

"Kellam! Guess what? The plan worked, I'm very clever!"

Kellam grumbled and shook his head. "Orders?"

I opened my mouth to tell him, but he stopped me. "They can't see or hear me. You'll have to give the command."  
This gag is getting old. I swear, I am never putting myself in command again, I keep taking stupid risks with my own health and safety.

The last time ended with me _getting thrown off a cliff_. Sweet crystal dragon jesus.

"Alright, gentlemen!" That got their attention. "For those of you who didn't see the fireworks earlier, I'm Cameron, one of the Shepherds. You may also know me as that idiot who got himself blasted off a cliff."

Chuckles are good.

"Anyway, our genius tactician, Naga bless his soul, gave us the best job of all – we get to stand in front of the enemy hordes without cover!"

Groans.

"Oh, you're all big boys with big armor. Come on, let's go get formed up."

Which was how I ended up looking at a giant onrushing horde of axemen. I hate my life. "Hold the line..."

Kellam grinned next to me. "Scared?"

"Gee, I wonder if the onrushing horde clued you in on that." Oh god they're so close. Why me? Seriously, why the hell was I the one to end up in this situation?

Contact. Chaos. The knights managed to spear most of them, but DODGE. Roll. Stab in back. Dammit. Block. Oh god. So many. Shield bash, swing. That's two.

Focus, Cameron. No time for moral choices. Just...work on instinct, that's all your fighting style seems to be anyway. No moral choices, no debating just...keep a count.

Three. Four. Fivesix. Dodge. Shoulder grazed. Arrow in shield. The've got archers. Raise awareness. Awareness raised. We're being overwhelmed.

That looks like their commander. Sod that. Not in any state to fight a company commander. Focus on the grunts OH GOD. Ow. Ow. Ow. Jesus. I don't do knee injuries. Damn. Arrow to the knee

I know what I'm thinking don't make that joke. Oh, crap, hammer user-Ugh. I'm down. Son of a – someone grabbed the arrow. No, don't pull it out SON OF A urgh. I'm fading in and out. Someone's dragged me up. Huh. Lon'qu? Maybe. He's saying something. Can't hear it. Damn, don't fall unconcious. He's dragged me back. Hey Lissa. Damn.

"Are...y...right?"

Dammit.

More talking that I can't hear. Son of a bitch. I'm just going to go to sleep for a bit...

* * *

"Hey."

Oh god not this place. Do I end up here even when I'm just unconcious? I hate this place. Stupid blue void. Ugh.

"Eugune. Not seen you in a while."

The old bearded man shrugged. "I'm not Eugune."

"Old Hubba, then?"

"Nope. I'm just taking forms that you are familiar with."

"Oh god, you're not my conscience are you?"

The old man grinned and faded away. "Not as such."

Oh dammit, the stupid little chessboard floor is back. Why?

"What's with all the chess motifs? Is this Code Geass or something?" I grinned. Might as well see if I can rile him up.

"You know, I was going to explain everything..." Oh, I have not stopped myself from learning the answers have I? "...but quite frankly I think you deserve to be confused. Enjoy your head injury, someone tried to crush your skull with a hammer."

And there's the pain. Great. I...ow. Owowowow. Agh. Agh. I can't...ugh. Void's gone. Black. Fine. I can do black. Just gonna...try to blot this out for a while.

* * *

A/N: Took too long and a bit crappy IMO, but I've been a bit depressed recently, my dog died last Friday. Spring break's coming up next week though, so I should be able to do something with actual quality then.

Thanks to everyone who reviewed/favorited either of my stories,

-G2G

EDIT 16/05/2013: Grammar and spelling changes, nothing else. To be honest, this chapter could do with being either longer or fused with another, but I like the flow it's got in its current position so there's just this random chapter 1000 words shorter than my average in the middle.


	9. Chapter Eight (Cam VIII)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter Eight– More Problems**

* * *

I do not see shapes, I see random colors that kind of blur together. I no longer hear sounds, I kind of see them. I think. The yellow blob just moved. The blue blob too. That's...interesting. Third yellow blob.

From simple thinking, that's probably Chrom, Lissa and...I guess Emmeryn? Oh, hey, white-and-black blob. Robin.

Yellow blob one just glowed pale blue. Wow. Okay, I can see things now. Yep, that's pretty much everybody I expected.

"Well." Oh, my mouth's dry. "How long was I out?"

Robin shrugged. "About a day. We won."

It hurts to nod. "Head injury?"

"Yuuuup." Oh, cut it out you smartass. I really don't need this right now, Robin. "Next time, try to _block_ the hammer."

I tried to summon up the darkest death glare I could, but since Chrom just started laughing into his hand it probably isn't that intimidating. Time to get down to buisness.

"What d'you want, Robin?"

Yeah, let's just pretend I didn't see anyone else. Why does my arm feel heavy and wet? Robin's started chuckling to himself.

"We had Anna come and get us once you'd woken up, see if you were up for giving a report." He explained. Narrow eyes.

"...how would Anna know I was waking up...?"

"She didn't. Lissa said she would've come and told us before now, but it looks like she's fallen asleep" At that, Chrom and Lissa both starting chuckling openly. No, seriously, why does my arm feel...oh. OH. Uhm.

Okay.

There is an attractive redhead asleep on my arm. Um. How exactly does one deal with this situation? Oops, I forgot I'm an idiot. I just snatched my arm away and now she's fallen to the floor with a small 'eep'.

"What was that for?" Anna scowled, pulling herself back up. Agh, I can't feel my arm.

"What reaction were you expecting? Why were you doing that anyway?" I'm really confused right now. Anna tapped her chin.

"...I wanted to get that gold you owe me-"

"I already told you..." This is getting really old "...Chrom is back, I'm not in _charge of your paycheck_!"

"Wait." Chrom asked with a frown. "She's actually that expensive?"

All I want for Christmas is someone to punch. "Let's just get back on track. Report on..."

"We're at war with Plegia, we were hoping you could give some Intel about their army strength-"

"NO. Are we at war? Jee, I didn't notice that from the _onrushing horde of death and destruction_." Tired Cameron is sarcastic angry bitter Cameron. Calm down. You really need to learn what this mysterious 'tact' is. "Sorry, I'm just a little worn out here." Let's try and sit up straight. Nope, nope, that doesn't work I'm falling down and – oh, thanks Anna. A bit of propping up and she smirks. Dear lord, Cameron, cut her off. "I'm not paying you for that."

"Wasn't going to ask you to." She looked almost insulted.

"Yes, you were."

"...yes, I was. But not for much."

Let's just focus our attention on Chrom, Robin and oh god all of this happened in front of the Exalt that's not good. What the hell happened to good impressions, Cameron?

"Your worship" Dear lord, is that the correct term of address? Please let it be so. "Sorry about the...everything, I didn't notice you there."

Wow that smile is, like, diplomacy given a face or something. "Please, do not worry."

Alright, time to gather some thoughts. "In all honesty, I was in a tent. Anna was kicking around outside."

"She wants money for it." Chrom said with a pained expression. "We figured you were worth a shot first."

...this is going to be a long conversation, isn't it?

* * *

Thankfully, it only took about half an hour for me to convince Anna to tell all without getting paid. I'm pretty sure she's feeling some measure of guilt for me getting blown off a cliff or something. Unfortunately...neither of us know anything beyond it was maybe a tenth of their actual forces deployed that day. Robin did not take this fact kindly, and was in fact outside the tent ranting for the next five minutes.

I really do have to remember that curse about stabbing someone in the eye with a rusty pitchfork. It was rather effective.

Eventually, they all left to give me some 'space'. I've been staring at the roof wishing they hadn't decided to give me this 'space' and something to do-why is my lap heavy.

Book. Two-way book. Dammit, Lucien, why now?

* * *

_Hey_

Piss off

_Wow, not feeling great huh?_

Lucien, I am really not in the mood right now.

_Pity, because I am._

The only reason I'm talking to you is so the damn book won't teleport back to my lap at the worst possible second.

_That's nice. So...what'd you think of Emmeryn?_

Piss off Lucien

_Nice enough woman, isn't she? Not bad on the eyes, either. Well, she will be, but I suppose that's what falling does to a person. She won't have anyone to catch her._

Lucien, I am warning you.

_Or what? Do you even know what I am?_

I know you're real. Anna's sister's met you, and if you're real, I can kill you.

_Please. You and me? You're an Outsider. I'm your Alternate. You don't even begin to compare to me. _

The fuck is an alternate?

_Alternate. It's always capatalized._

Why?

_Because screw you._

I think I hate you.

_Not the first, won't be the last. Now c'mon, answer the question._

She's...nice. She doesn't deserve to die.

_Come on...use that great big brain of yours Cameron! You can think of what happens if she lives!_

If she sacrifices herself...moral of the Plegian army drops. The war gets shut off.

_Right. So, if she doesn't..._

War drags on. World is in a worse state when the Valmese land, hell maybe we'd even loose. It would put us just as on-track towards a Bad Future as her dying in the assassination attempt would be. Maybe even worse.

_Worse how?_

She'd try to diplomacy frigging Walhart, and that won't end well.

_Clever boy._

Why are you asking me this?

_To see how you'd react to realizing that someone you know will die, and there's nothing you can do to stop it._

_See you, Outsider..._

* * *

He's stopped replying. Son of a bitch, he's right. That's been in the back of my head since I got here. Emmeryn has to die.

I have to make sure she dies. She has to sacrifice herself. She...she has to die. Damn it.

Okay, Cameron. Make it easy on yourself. Don't interact with her again for a while. It'll be easier that way.

The most important thing now is to never let it slip to Chrom that you could/could have prevent/ed it. He'll destroy you.

Crap, someone's coming. Hide the book. Hey...Stahl?

"Not gonna lie." I sigh. "You are not the person I expected to see."

Stahl shrugged and dropped onto my lap a plate of...food. Delicious food.

"But I am extremely happy that you came."

Any conversation that would occur was promptly destroyed by shared consumption of what probably amounted to half a pig and most of a farmer's field. Once it was gone, however...

"So" He asks. "How'd your missions go?"

"Recruited two new Shepherds by necessity, did some crazy things, saved a village." I shrugged. "All in a day's work, you know? How about you?"

Stahl grimaced. "We ran into a bunch of Risen after they'd razed a village to the ground. We were a bit late, I suppose. It was...horrible."

Holy _shit_

"Stahl, you've probably been told this by a thousand better people than me, but I can assure you that it was not your fault."

Stahl raised his hands into the air. "I know that, it doesn't make it any less painful though. With a war going on at the same time..."

He's right. Crap.

"We have to end one threat sooner rather than later." I groan. "And, let's be honest here, the Risen aren't going anywhere."

"How do we end a war quickly?" He asked into thin air.

Why the hell should I know? "Ask Robin, he's the genius. I just come up with crazy plans that almost get me killed."

Some light chuckling, and he excused himself to give me 'space'. Fine, you all want to give me space? I'll just go to sleep.

* * *

Which, naturally, means talking to Eugune/Hubba/God/Whoever the hell this old man is. Because I can't sleep normally these days.

To be perfectly honest though...I did not expect to end up playing Magic: The Gathering with him. This just defies all logic.

"How the hell did this happen?" I ask in bewilderment. He shrugs.

"I figured you'd be missing something of home at this point." He explains. "I'm not here just to torment you, you know."

That's...oddly touching.

I glance down at my cards and sigh. I don't even know what this deck does. It looks...White/Black? Okay, so that means super-defensive and draw the game out for a long time.

I smirk. "So what are you here for, Mysterious Stranger?"

He shrugs. "Please, call me Eugune."

"Bull." Don't get too angry now, Cameron. "You are _not_ Eugune, please stop disrespecting his memory like that."

The old man's face softens. "I'm...sorry. I just chose a figure you'd be familiar with."

Now I feel like a jackass. It's like he's legitimately trying to help me.

"It's just...I'm sorry. We were never close, but...he's still dead, you know?" I'm trying desperately to get some kind of point across. "I'm not a fan of disrespecting the dead. Let lost souls rest and so on."

"Never had you pegged for a religious man." He took his turn. Oh, hey, turn one shockland. Blue/White.

He's playing the really manipulative asshole colors. That suits him far too well.

"I'm not." I shrugged. "I always had myself pegged as an Agnostic, but at this point...well, it's hard to be Agnostic when something clearly exists. And are we seriously talking about religion right now?"

The old man laughs. "I guess you're right, it is an odd tangent."

The game evolved over the next few turns in silence. He had the upper hand, but I'm White/Black, the ultimate colors for pushing the Reset Button.

"What am I here for?" I ask finally. The Old Man grins.

"You're here to be a wild card." He says kindly. "You're here to be something that nobody could have predicted, and give people a little push."

But...there's multiple timelines. I must have – oh. OH.

"I wasn't in the original timeline, was I?"

"What?" The Old Man frowns at me. "Of course you bloody were! In the original timeline, Lissa got to you too late and you ended up paraplegic due to spinal cord damage. You became the Shepherd's quartermaster, and...well, spoilers. Point is, Lucina coming back - and HEALING you - gave you a divergence point."

Well, I guess I've got to thank Lucina for that when I next see her, then.

"In THIS incarnation, you're a wild card, because Grima doesn't expect you to be able to fight...which means you can bring in that stupid OP shield I gave you."

"Yeah, speaking of, is that some kind of plot device?" I ask, frowning. "It seems kind of stupid to give some random dude a shield that can block any attack, and for it not to play any major role in the story."

He just sits there and smiles. My turn. I draw, and grin. Exactly what I was looking for. I play this, then something else in my hand and win.

Going off of cliche's, when I win I probably wake up.

Wait, something been's bothering me more than any of the timeline bullcrap.

"Old Man...what's an Alternate?"

He just gives me a cryptic look. "A price I had to pay to bring you here."

Well that's ominous.

"What can Lucien do?" Actually, scrap that. "What can Alternates do?"

He just grins. "I'm sorry, part of the contract says you can only have so many answers a dream."

"You have got to be joking." I deadpan.

He pulls out a contract that I have no memory of signing, but there it is. My signature scrawled – evidently pre-landing-here-and-having-my-dyspraxia-fixed, so it looks crap – but signed all the same, and right there in the middle...

Only one piece of information per dream

What.

"What."

Screw it, I've had enough. Never been the most patient person alive. I play my combo, and I win, and the game's over and so's the dream. Wait, no it's not. I'm forgetting something. The Old Man sits there and raises an eyebrow.

"Cameron...Magic is played in a match of three games..."

Oh. Right. I knew that. I sigh and prepare myself for another few games against the surprisingly good Old Man.

* * *

A/N: Hooray for infodumps. Actually, hooray for Spring Break. New story started (Probably not to everybody's tastes, it's just me being a shameless romantic and film nerd again but for something else this time), a Time Matters Not chapter, this, and another TMN chapter getting put together for tomorrow but no it's not the wedding.

It takes a while, sorry.

After that...ugh, next week's gonna suck. I will survive, hopefully. Next chapter: More character bonding, and the start of the Assassination Attempt. It will be out fairly quicker than this, provided that Fate/Stay Night doesn't distract me again. Damn my fantastic friends in the Anime club who got me a copy and told me where to find the English patch...

EDIT 16/05/2013: Grammar, switching words around, et cetera.

EDIT 24/05/2013: I changed a major plot point - a version of Cameron was, in fact, in the original timeline. I did this to give myself actual conversation points with the future children when they arrive, because while being a complete unknown opened up plenty of opportunities for Awesome it didn't lend itself too well for Heartwarming/Tearjerker. I think it's a decent tradeoff.


	10. Chapter Nine (Cam IX)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Nine– The Night is Dark and full of Ninjas**

* * *

Two weeks and I still haven't heard from Lucien or the Old Man. I've been marching up and down this hallway for two weeks, while Chrom, Emmeryn and other people try to pull together something vaguely resembling an army, and each night I just get more and more tense.

When are the assassins going to show up? How accurate was the game? How screwed am I? Is Lucina going to show up and everything run fine, or is everything going to get shot to hell?

Oh, thank god, I'm done for the night. Let's just go inside, then. Let's just...let's just go get some sleep.

"Evening, Kellam." Yawn. This is boring. I pity the guy.

"It's morning now, actually" He got up and started putting his armor on. "Your shift over?"

"Yup." I said lazily. "I'm going to go and sleep like a rock now, you have fun walking up and down the empty hall."

It's a very pretty hall, I'll give it that. I suppose that's what being in a ruler's castle is like, though. I never thought it'd be so...big, though. Or that we'd all get crammed into two rooms for the guys. I've been spoiled by the individual rooms back at the Shepherd's barracks, and I miss that bed already. It's better than this thing. Still, I guess I can't complain. I'm only sharing with Stahl, Kellam and Lon'qu. No Vaike is involved, and to be perfectly honest Frederick's been starting to annoy me recently. I'm not under the impression he quite trusts me.

I still can't get a read on Lon'qu. I've never been good with people in general, but...the guy's so quiet. Even though we are clearly not women. Actually, I haven't seen him interact with any women recently. Or at all. That's probably on purpose, but when half of the castle guards are pegasus knights you'd expect a lot more unusual incidents from him.

Though there was that one time where Anna tried to convince him to put on a display and she'd sell tickets...I'm not sure how, but I somehow managed to walk away with less money than before and the situation defused. Everyone seems to have come to the conclusion that Anna is 'My Problem' and that I should 'Deal With It'.

I'm honestly not sure where they got that idea from. This is way too much thinking for me, so I'll just go to sleep right now.

...

I said right now. Look, body, there's the rest of the shepherds and the entire frigging holy guard, plus Lucina, if the assassination is tonight. Somebody will wake me up, let me frigging sleep – FINE.

I must have sat there stewing for three hours before I gave up and went for a walk. Wandering...wandering...wandering...oh, there's Phila. Ooh, she looks pissed.

"What are you doing here so late?"

I opened my mouth to respond, when she held up a hand to stop me.

"Five words or less."

...okay, universe, if you're setting up a Buffy reference this perfectly I am not letting it pass, no matter how much it'll hurt me in return.

"Out. For. A. Walk." I counted down on my fingers. That's four... "Bitch."

To her credit, she wasn't phased at all, or at least I don't think so. She was angry to begin with, so it's hard to tell.

"Out for a walk, near the Exalt's room, at three in the morning."

"Oh, is that the time? Right. That makes sense." I said brightly. Uhm, maybe I shouldn't piss off the Falcon Knight. "Calm down, commander. I've just got a really weird sleep cycle, and I may have gotten lost."

She's calmed down considerably. The pointing of the spear at my throat has gone away, at least.

"It...is rather confusing." She admitted. "I suppose restricting you all to one section of the building would cause problems. My apologies."

"Don't worry about it, you're doing your job." I waved her off and decided to go look outside the window. For some bizarre reason she decided to join me. "Something wrong, commander?"

All of a sudden, she looks incredibly tired. "The Exalt worked so hard to stave off war, and it's arrived anyway. What kind of monster would..."

"Commander, I've met Gangrel." I cut her off. "The man is completely insane. It won't make you feel better, but I can assure you there was no reasoning with him from the start."

I don't care how well-intentioned he was in the game, he came off as freaking insane so he's insane. Wait, is she chuckling?

"You'd be surprised." She sighed. "I was under the impression that there might have been something we could do..."

"Not without risking more lives lost." I don't even know where I'm going with this. "Commander, there's only so much anyone can do to prevent any one thing without consequence. At some point, something had to give. With a choice between sacrificing her people or making a stand, the Exalt made her decision."

We stood there in silence for a few minutes, before she sighed again. "I suppose you may be right."

Score one for the Outsider..."I...thank you, Commander."

"Shepherd. Please, call me Phila. There is...no-one else here."

"...Phila." I smirk. "Nice to meet you, my name's Cameron."

I could have sworn she was blushing. Yep, she forgot my name. Nice going, commander.

"Why are you laughing?" Oh, crap, didn't realize that was out loud.

"I was just remembering something from...a story from my childhood." If by childhood you mean read three years ago in another dimension.

"Oh?"

Dammit, now I'm going to have to roll with this. "Some old fantasy story someone came up with. I can't remember much of it, but one line keeps coming back. It seemed oddly fitting right now."

Most of the stars are covered by the clouds, and there's very little light. If I was going to launch an assassination, it would be...during the change of guard...at three in the morning...when not even the moonlight could aid the defenders.

Oh. Crap.

"For the night is dark..." I muttered to myself, trying to focus on the semi-lit courtyard. Yes, that's definitely Chrom and Robin...the third figure must be Lucina. Considering she just backflipped-killed someone, the attack is already underway "...and full of terrors."

Phila must have followed my gaze, because her own eyes widened. "Is this-?"

"We're under attack. I'll get the rest of the Shepherds to wake up." Of course it would happen while you're finding out new and interesting things about someone.

"Good luck." The commander muttered as she ran the other way. Okay, the stairs are here...

"Everyone, get up!" I slam my shield against something large and metal that was entering the room. Oh, crap, sorry Kellam. I thought you were a statue. "We may be under attack."

Lon'qu leaped from his bed immediately. "Where?"

"I saw someone fighting in the courtyard, one of them is definitely dead. Commander Phila's run off to get the royal guard assembled and oh for crying out loud, Stahl, GET UP!"

The sleepy night rose and, seeing our own panic, started putting on his armor. Lon'qu brushed past me.

"I'll get the other men." He grumbled. Kellam left to go wake up the women, I guess.

Leaving me here with a half-prepared Stahl. So, if reality continues to hate me, I'm going to be in serious trouble right...about...whenever I drop my guard. Um.

He's dressed in his armor, and grabbed his sword. Okay, we can't really ride a horse it here so we'll have to survive. I still haven't seen him fight. My guess is we're probably on one of the side corridors, so – there. One thief who must have been unlocking the doors, and two axemen. Yup, this is it. The thief isn't Gaius, right? Nope, black hair not orange.

They stand there in awkward shock for a few seconds before diving at us. Okay, Cameron, remember your – OH GOD the thief is fast. I don't think I can keep up. Crap. Okay. I only just managed to deflect that slash. Keep him in your front. Damn. Okay. Thank god for shields, it's got a wide enough surface area to block his next three without having to move. Huh, he's just flailing around really fast but without anything resembling a defense. If I just stick my sword out – okay, I've caught his on it. Shove it off to the side – yep, he's stumbling back. No time to re-align my sword for a killing blow, so let's just go with smashing him in the face with the shield. Oh, that crunch sounded horrible. I must have broken his nose or something. Yep, he's in shock. Right, no mercy Cameron, just take him out.

We can sit down and think about how you're killing people who are only following orders later. Oh, seriously? Is my sword seriously stuck in his spine? At least he's dead, I guess...

Stahl just let out a cry of pain. He'd taken one out, but the other axeman had gotten a good blow on his shoulder. Dammit, I don't have a sword right now –time to Captain America it again. Shield charge him – oh, hey, that's a conveniently placed pillar. Slam it into him again, he's down on one knee. Again, he's on the floor. Alright – oh, god, Cameron what have you done?

Repeated impacts to his head kind of reduced it to chunky salsa. I...I think I'm going to be sick. Think of something else, quickly.

"Stahl, are you alright?"

"I'll live." He grimaced. His sword arm was completely useless now. "I better find somewhere to lay low, I'm no help like this."

I spend the next few seconds pulling my sword out of the dead thief. "Alright, be careful."

Stahl wandered off, leaving me alone in this hallway. That's okay, I can deal with it why did everything just get darker?

Something slammed into my back, and OH THAT'S COLD. That...can't be natural. Ugh. I can't breath. Get up, Cameron, get up...Turn. It's...not Validar, that's a good thing I guess. It's just this random shaman. Who is kicking my ass. Stop underestimating people just because they don't have names, Cameron, that'll get you killed.

Now get up. Okay, there's another ball of not-light – shadow is way too light a word to describe how dark that is – so let's test a theory. Shield.

Yep, it blocked it perfectly. So, theory proven – this shield is overpowered like nobody's business The impact did make me stumble a bit, though. Alright, asshole, let's dance – or not. That's a javelin where your throat used to be, where did the javelin come from?

Oh, hey Donnel!

"Hey! Long time no see!" I said brightly. Let's put on the tough face. "What happened, man?"

"Ah went trainin' with Stahl an' Sully. Stahl came in all bleedin' like while Robin was gettin' a plan together, said you might need help. Robin sent me."

He certainly looks more badass. An actual helmet, a small shield – no, it's a buckler – and a whole stack of javelins. He...looks less like a villager and more like a Soldier from the Tellius games, actually. That makes more sense than him becoming a swords or axeman, actually.

To be perfectly honest, he actually looks kind of impressive. That might be the body armor and lack of pot helmet, though.

"Well, I'm not complaining." I sigh. "So...we're holding this hallway, then?"

"Yup" Donnel drawled. "Let's see if ah can keep up with ye!"

Oh dear lord, please let me not have become some kind of indestructible hero in his eyes. I really don't want to be considered that. "We'll see." I shrug. He pulls out another javelin from his – is it even called a quiver when its for spears? Man, I wish I had access to google right now – and headed towards the end.

"Robin said to bar the doors shut, an' then keep an eye open for anyone who made it in." He explained. True to his words, the double doors at the end of the hallway had been opened...carefully. I look around outside, and...it looks like all the assassins are already in the building. Shrugging, I shut the doors and started looking for something to hold it shut. There, that'll do it. An old – like, really old – stone replica of a greatsword. Let's use that. Between the two of us, we only just managed to put the damn thing in place. It was absurdly heavy. Donnel slumped against the door, panting, and I just managed to catch my second wind.

"Hey, Donnel. I'm going to go check some of the side rooms, you keep an eye out here, yeah?"

Wait what the hell am I thinking? Don't split the party – dammit, too late. I'm already in the side room. Nobody here, but let's just keep moving. Guest room, dining room, three different lounges – jeez, how big is this place?

Wait, isn't this the upper-floor corridor I was on earlier? How did I – oh, right that lounge had a set of stairs. This is right outside the Exalt's room, but not on any of the sides that had a door...Those shouts must be the rest of the Shepherds, then. I should probably go and help-who's in that mirror?

This is freaky. It's not my reflection, I would never wear clothes of that stupid a color. I mean, red and white? Who the hell wants to paint themselves like that, it's like saying 'Over Here I Am A Very Conspicuous Target Please Hit Me'. My hair's not that long either, and I'm pretty sure I'd remember bleaching it. I'd be panicking a lot more if it wasn't for the fact that his face is exactly the same as mine.

Like, perfectly. It's kind of square, the nose is a little bent to one side in the middle, and the eyes are the exact same shade of grey. There's something odd happening here. The figure in the mirror appeared to sigh, picked up a pointed feathered hat – red, again – and put it on his head, smiling at me.

"What's up, Outsider?"

...Outsider?

The figure came out of the mirror – no, the pane of glass. Stupid, Cameron, stupid – shards scattering all over the floor, a short curved knife in his left hand. I need to block – too fast, he's too fast – I'm on the floor. Something's in my stomach, it's the knife isn't it?

Yes, yes it is. Shit. Okay, get back up – he's got two more. Defend, you fool – damn! My sword!

Where'd he send it – over there, okay. I can deal with that, just...just shield smash him now – my leg. Shit.

I'm down on one knee. The man grinned at me.

"As I was saying..."

His hands flashed down, impaling two more knifes through my legs. I...oh, god, this is pain. I actually...don't understand how it hurts so much. Has he pinned me to the floor?

A third dagger went through my sword hand, and if my leg's aren't stuck to the floor it sure as hell is. Ow. Son of a...bitch. Ow.

He dragged an old chair out from the side of the hallway, and sat in front of me, smiling from under his hat.

"As I was saying, Outsider..." He leaned forwards, pulling back on my hair to force eye contact. "...what's up?"

* * *

A/N: I'm working on CH10 right now people, put the fire away. It'll be done by Wednesday. Who wants answers as to how dimension travelling works in this universe?

...

I really hope I'm not about to waste a chapter.

ANYWAY, on a serious note, I really do want critique on how the plot's developing so far. Am I overpowering the OC's – except for the Old Man, he's kind of meant to be – or is it fine? Did I ruin canon in any way that wasn't on purpose? Plot holes?

Finally: Do I need to find a way to get rid of the shield? It's kind of a plot point, but I'm getting worried that it might make some fights too easy.

Oh, right, Roxasfan asked a question as to what class Cameron is in-fic. He's not a Mercenary, he's a custom class I made by fusing the old Soldier class with the new Mercenary class. He's got high Luck, but the rest of his stats are pretty average, and his only skill so far (If I had to grab one from the game) would be Dual Guard+. I call it Warden, and the only reason it exists is to give myself an idea of how my – his? - fighting style develops over the course of the fic.

PS: I really wish I could take credit for the 'Full of ninjas' joke, but it's from a youtube parody of Game of Thrones by seanzoz.

EDIT 16/05/2013: Last edit for today, and...next to nothing gets done. I'll admit, most of these edits are fixing little things, except for the filler chapters which end up extended to include more conversations.


	11. Chapter Ten (Cam X)

**ASLEEP**

**Rated T for violence, imagery and cursing**

**Chapter Ten– Lucien**

* * *

What the fuck is going on? Ugh, I can't move my hand. Okay, this is a lot of pain, but at the same time not that much pain if I stay still. Well, it's not like I have a choice, most of my limbs are pinned to the floor by knives. Who the hell is this jackass?

Look at him, sitting on his chair looking incredibly smug.

"What's wrong Outsider? Confused?" Taunting. I hate this guy already. "Let's see – who do you think I am?"

There's really only one option here. "Lucien. What the hell are you?"

"I told you already, I'm your Alternate." Lucien leaned forwards and prodded his feathered cap with a finger. "And you're an Outsider."

"Speak...English..." The pain's coming back now. I guess it must have been shock or something that made it feel less...pain-y. Well, there goes my capacity to use language. Wonderful.

Lucien groaned and palmed his face, slumping back in his chair. "Riiiiight. Exposition dump time."

...is this guy for real? "Lucien, what the hell are you on?"

Um. That's an impressive glare. Okay, Cameron, new tactic: Don't taunt the guy who just completely obliterated you in a few seconds. I...think I'm getting dizzy. That'll be the blood loss.

"I'm on life." He grinned, and somehow even that cliche came out all twisted and terrifying. "A life that I honestly never thought I'd have."

"You see, Outsider, there's one very special rule to switching dimensions: Balance must be maintained. Now, normally this is done by switching around some locations and confusing the knowledge the Outsider has of the world, but in your case...well. You changed too much, Cammie Boy."

I will rip this man's throat out as soon as I regain use of my hands, just for that frigging nickname.

"Think about it. You were...well, not overweight, but not fit either. Your eyesight was just average, you'd never learned how to fight before and – this is the big one – you had a hand-eye co-ordination disorder."

Oh, crap, I think I see where this is going.

"Now, when you subconsciously signed the contract with the Old Man to end up here – I'll leave him to explain that, because I honestly couldn't give two craps – you made an idealized version of yourself. Suddenly, you are fit, strong, and most importantly your dyspraxia is gone. Now, short of blowing up the world, there really was nothing the Old Man could do to balance out your sudden elevation to actual competence. You changed too much about yourself. Now, the protocol for that...is the creation of an Alternate. Hi."

I'm getting tunnel vision. Shit, stay awake you idiot. "And just what...the hell...is an Alternate?"

Lucien's face twisted into a vicious glare, as a single gloved hand grabbed my hair and forced eye contact.

"I am, you _moron_." My hair's free, thank god. Keep eye contact. "I was made just so you had something to worry about. I am everything you hated about your personality given form, so that you would have some kind of ultimate enemy to fight. The more you changed about yourself, the stronger I got, and lo and behold – I'm pretty badass right now. Oh, there might be a glass ceiling that I'll hit at some point, but as for now I'm a higher level than anyone else on your team and I'm just going to keep getting better. If I wanted, I could wipe out all of the shepherds right now all because you _changed too much_."

Oh no. No. No. Please don't. Not like this. We can't die like this. I won't let them die like this.

"Luckily for you..." Did...did he just backhand me? I think he did. Crap, my tooth's loose. Spit it out before you choke on it. "...I'm not going to do that. No, I'm going to wait two years, then kill you at your strongest and prove that you were never good enough for anything, even with all the little changes you made. So, to make sure you don't just cheat and kill _yourself _or something like that, here's the deal – I'm not going to kill all the shepherds, just the next three people to come down this hall."

...what kind of logic is that?

"This way, you'll see that I mean business while not making you extremely depressed." Lucien grinned. "Hell, maybe I'll luck out and get to pop Chrom. Wouldn't that screw you over? Lucina wouldn't be able to stop me...you sure as hell can't...Robin? Please. The guy's smart, I'll give him that, but as of right now you are _all_ my bitch."

Footsteps coming down the hall. Crap. Please no. Just turn around and run, maybe this asshole will get bored and leave without killing anyone.

They're getting closer. Please don't be anyone I know – oh, thank god. It's just a group of pegasus knights I don't know.

Lucien got off his chair and bowed. "Ladies. I know that the scumbag here doesn't care about you-" What? I never said – oh god, I was thinking it. How does he know? "-and is in fact relieved that you are the ones about to die rather than people he considers important. If it's any consolation, I will attempt to make it quick. Sometimes, though...I do get carried away."

What the hell is wrong with me?

The pegasus knights charged with a shout. Lucien sighed and drew a pair of curved daggers, spinning them in his hands.

"So..." He tossed one of them. "overconfident."

The first pegasus knight slumped to the floor, a knife sticking through her eye. Lucien grabbed the shaft of the first lance to get close enough, twisted it to the side, got in close and slit the second's throat, leaving her to bleed to death on the floor. I've got to get loose, I have to help – agh. Crap. My sword hand's ruined, I need healing fast if I want to keep it. Legs. Get them out of my ankles. First one.

The final pegasus knight is putting up one hell of a fight, actually. Lucien actually looks rather concerned with how fast she is. I can hear more people getting closer, maybe they'll be able to stop -oh no.

I roll over, the last knife out of my knee, and grab my shield, curling up behind it as a blast of dark magic smashed into it. I can barely breathe...so much pain...ow...

Another shaman?

No. Crap. Goatee, grey skin, stupid haircut. Validar. Crap. Crap.

Can I stand up? No, no I can't. Validar snorts in amusement.

"Pathetic fool."

...I'm gonna die I'm gonna die I'm gonna -

"HEY! NO KILL STEALING!"

Lucien tackled into Valdiar's side shoulder first, sending them both into an old decorative suit of armor. Wow, that's a lot of noise. The third pegasus knight pulls herself to her feet and glares at the dead bodies of her sisters. Everything's going blurry. That'll be the blood loss again. Naturally. Alright, get to my feet...I really wish I could see Validar and Lucien duke it out, because that's probably ten different kinds of awesome, but priorities. Healer. Find a healer.

The third pegasus knight lets out a cry and charges at Lucien, thrusting her spear. Lucien let out a gasp – wait, was that pain? Holy crap, she hit him! He's got a spear in his leg! Yes, we can kill the bastard now!  
He gave out a brief grunt, kicking the knight in the stomach and jabbing a knife into Validar's shoulder. The sorcerer reeled back, pulling it out and glaring at my Alternate. Lucien grinned as the sorceror turned and stalked away, in what he would probably deny was a retreat. I'm willing to say that Validar could have killed the bastard, but he's got his own mission right now that he's probably trying to do.

Oh. Right.

Emmeryn has to die in public, so not yet. Crap. Get a move on, Cameron-

"Where do you think you're going, Cammie Boy?" Taunt. I can hardly see. There's some brief explosions of darkness and some yellow light – lightning spells? - from around the corner. Validar must have run into someone, who uses Thunder spells? That's Robin's specialty, isn't it?

Oh, there goes Validar's corpse. Right out the window. Oh, god, most of his chest was missing. Heh, he really is heartless now.

...I've lost more blood than I thought if I honestly made that joke. Healer. Now.

Oh, thank god, it's not just Robin, the entire damn team's shown up. Yeah, I'll just stay slumped here, Maribelle and Anna are already moving. I can't make out what they are saying, but they are here. Let's just try and focus on...oh god. The final knight is bleeding from a whole bunch of stab wounds in her chest, and Lucien isn't stopping. He's chanting...something, but I can't make out what. Dude, stop, she's dead please just let her rest stop stabbing her STOP STABBING HER.

Finally, Lucien lets the corpse fall to the floor, his white and red clothes covered in blood. Chrom just charged towards him, but the bastard basically just moved around, did a back flip, and landed on the ledge of an open window.

"See you, Outsider..."

I don't know why those words were so clear above everything else, but the lunatic dived out of the window. Damn, it's too dark to give chase now. I take it that Emmeryn made it through okay. I'm just gonna...kind of...go to sleep now...

"-aius, help me hold him up-"

"Don't you dare-"

"-osing him-"

"-eron, are yo-"

Stop talking loud people, just let me...fade away for now...ah...

Oblivion.

* * *

Dad, please turn out the sun. It's hurting my eyes.

Ugh. Wait, I'm alive? Holy crap, I was not expecting to live through that one. Lucien delivered one hell of a – oh. Right. Lucien.

He's my fault. Son of a bitch. Of all the after-school-special-bullcrap to come bite me in the ass, I never thought it would be the whole 'be happy with yourself'' thing. Dammit, Cameron, you could have just come here and then worked out but nooo, you had to be ready to fight on arrival, you had to get rid of everything you hated about yourself and now every_thing you hate about yourself is wa__**ndering around killing people and it's all your fault you overconfident self-righteous baSTARD.**_

Deep breaths. Calm down. Oh, god, my hand hurts. Is it...oh thank god, it's in one piece. I can hold a sword. Damn. Feet? Are my feet still there? Yes, although it hurts to move my toes. Okay. This luck of mine is insane, I should not have escaped that encounter intact.

Oh god. Everyone knows about the whole Outsider thing, they heard him call me that. I'll have to come clean and – no. Don't come clean. Never come clean. That's a stupid plan. Just...just keep it ambiguous. Say its some across-the-ocean bullcrap. Yeah, I'll pass it off as a – no. Idiot. Come clean to someone at least. But not Chrom. He'd rip your throat out for what'll happen to Emmeryn. Oh god, Phila's going to die too. Okay, Cameron. No more interactions with the NPC just because you want to know more about her. It'll destroy you. Good? Good. Okay. Limit yourself. Jesus. Let's get up. Get up.

Okay, swing legs over the side. Oh, good, they at least kept me dressed. Okay, Cameron, stand up – ohgodfalling.

Okay, pull yourself up. Okay. Brace yourself against the wall.

"What are you doing?" Anna, I really don't have time for this. Wait, what the hell am I doing?

"I need...to check on the others." Yeah, that's a good reason. "How long...was I out?"

Yeah, pain's still there. Okay. Wait. What?

"...I'm not paying you for this."

"I wasn't going to ask."

...she's actually serious this time. That's...unusual.

"How come?" I smirk, wrapping my arm around her neck. "I thought you were all about the cash."

"Someone once told me there were things more important than money." Anna shrugged. Okay. I'll deal with that statement's implications later. Hobbling down the corridor, bad arm wrapped around Anna's shoulders, we slowly make our way towards the first source of noise. Oh, hey, it sounds like an argument.

"We need to get the Exalt out of the city." That sounds like Chrom allright.

"If that man from before is still running around, she'll need all the protection she can get. She'll be safer here." That's Phila. Yeah, let's start with them. Okay.

"That man" Oh, the pain "Won't be going anywhere nere the Exalt."

I managed to catch them by surprise. Awesome.

"...should you be up?" Chrom asks in surprise. Well...

"Probably not, no. Still...had to tell you about this guy." Okay, come up with something. "He...doesn't work for Plegia. He was here for a different reason."

That sent them for a loop. It makes sense, though – he attacked Validar, wounding him enough for Robin and gang to actually dispose of him. The mass difference in power level between early game Validar and endgame Validar never made much sense...back on track.

"What reason was that, then?" Phila narrowed her eyes. Yeesh, scary lady.

"For some...unknown reason...he's after me." Okay, now she's just curious. "Anyway, I'm gonna play it safe and stay the hell away from the Exalt after two years. That seems to be the best plan."

Chrom opened his mouth to object, but let's cut him off. "Chrom, he said I've got two years to get better. He...butchered those three women just to prove a point."

"And you trust that he's given you two years?" Phila asked sarcastically. Look, woman -

"Yes. He's...honorable in his own way. I don't trust him, but he's got no reason to not keep his word."

We stand there in awkward silence for a few seconds, before Phila sighed in resignation. "Very well. Given this new information, it would seem best for the Exalt to leave the city and visit Ferox in person."

"Thank you, commander." Chrom said, relieved. "Cameron, are you hungry?"

Oh, am I!

...

No, actually. I...I don't think I am. What the hell is wrong with me? I watched Lucien butcher three women and felt relieved because I didn't know them. I've killed – oh, god, I've lost count – people and treated it like a game. I feel sick.

"No, thank you. I think I'll...just get some bed rest."

Chrom nods farewell, and we all go our separate ways. Anna leaves me on the sickbay's bed and gives me some 'space'.

For once, I actually appreciate it.

* * *

A/N: I'm not entirely satisfied with this, I might come back and change it later. I'm really concerned about if Lucien's too OP, but hopefully it's been justified enough.

Anyway...ten chapters and a prologue in, how are we doing?

Wow. That's a lot of reviews. Wait, how many fav's and follows? Holy – okay. Damn. I can't let this schedule slip now. Anyway, as a 'thank you', here's one hundred-ish words of Anna-POV from back in Chapter Seven. Not much, but it's a neat bit of character development IMO.

EDIT 23/03/2013: Realized I missed some words in the last segment while brushing up working on the next chapter, added those in.

EDIT 17/05/2013: Fixed some things, added in a callback to the Anna 'C' support.

* * *

**Paralogue – Anna I**

This woman is annoying, I mean just who does she think she is? Who would do something so unbelievably noble as to try and talk down the enemy army by herself?

By noble I mean stupid.

At least Cameron has the common sense to admit when his plans are stupid...I really hope he's not going to die up there. Still, it's not like we're in a perfectly safe situation. We're halfway down a cliff, being shot at by archers, and I'm pretty sure that's a wyvern over there. Whatever he's paying me, it's not enough.

...

It's closer than anyone else has ever gotten to 'enough', though, I'll give him that.


	12. Chapter Eleven (Cam XI)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Eleven – Supportive**

Where on earth has my life taken me?

Over the course of the last three months, I have been stabbed (frequently), thrown off a cliff, forced into weird celestial gambit and had something out of an after-school-special come back as an unstoppable force of nature with a personality like the Joker mixed with Goku that has sworn to fight and kill me in two years.  
Which God(s) did I offend recently?

These were all questions I was asking myself as I finally received the all-clear to cease bed rest from the royal physician. That's right, I'm special. No being taken care of by Lissa and Maribelle for me, no sir. I get a stupid old man who an overly attached Anna had to correct at one point.

Bloody civilians – what am I saying? I've only been a soldier for three months now. I shouldn't be complaining about civilians, I pretty much am a civilian!

I need to get out of this bed and start hitting things again. I mean, the conversation's been nice when it happens, but all I've been hearing in terms of how the war is progressing is how slowly the shepherds have been in getting the Exalt out of here. I mean, talk about a railroad plot. They should have just left me here, I'd have been fine – probably. Actually, maybe not. Then again, maybe I should stop focusing on myself and assume there's different reasons as to why the whole thing's been taking so long.

You know, I can't even remember why they leave with Emmeryn. Is it...ugh, my memory of the game is slipping. One play through is _not_ enough to work this off of, but it's not like I could write it down, that would be a stupid plan. Still, it's not like any of it's gonna be the same with that com_plete lunatic __**wandering around killING INNOCENT PEO**__**PLE FOR NO REASON OTHER THAN TO PISS ME OFF**_ okay calm down. He's...dammit, I don't know how he's going to mess things up for me.

There are so many potential ways to do it. He's sworn not to hit the shepherds, so I'll just have to pray that promise includes any that have yet to be recruited. Or any plot-relevant NPCs. Although, he can be my frigging guest if he decides to take out Walhart or any of his generals for shits and giggles. Son of a bitch, what kind of stuff does he get up to in the first timeline where I can't even walk at this point? Does he just decide that means he's free to do whatever he wants or does he still challenge me (Not that I'd stand a chance at that point)?

Okay, well, I know what topic I'm shoving into the back of my head along with killing semi-innocent people and my family not being here - I become a frigging cripple in an alternate timeline. To be fair, there's probably a dimension where I basically become Doctor Strange and kill all the things, but that's not making me feel better.

Alright, let's just think about something else. Anything else. Wow, I just realized how much I miss playing Warhammer. Damn, maybe I should see if the Old Man would be willing to try it out.

...and see if he can let me rewind time back to before Matt Ward had written any codex's and CS Goto hadn't touched my beloved Eldar background.

Let's stop geeking out right now, Cameron, your current situation is more than grimdark enough without having to bring the Gods of Chaos into it.

Aaand now I'm thinking about Slaneesh. And now I'm thinking impure thoughts. Stupid hormones. Stupid Chaos God/dess of Pleasure.

Well, technically love because Chaos is about dragging things to their natural extremes but – STOP FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. No one cares about your hobbies, no one EVER cared about your hobbies, now is NOT THE TIME to start worrying about frigging lore inconsistencies!

Wow. The few days I've spent in this bed have reduced my attention span to nothing, apparently. I really need to just get outside for a bit, but my frigging legs haven't healed from when that bastard stabbed right through them.

Thank god my hand has, though. Nothing's crippled, which is pure blatant luck on my part. It would suck to be in Fire Emblem with a disabled sword hand no matter how broken your shield may be. I really need to figure out how I got that.

Old Man gives it to me. Did he accidentally give me the frigging Endgame weapon or something? I don't care.

The thing that is most irritating about this whole ordeal right now is that I still haven't met frigging Gaius or Panne. Let's just hope they're as cool as they are in the games. Especially Gaius, I was having so much fun writing him in that fanfic I never got around to posting.

...right, let's not mention the shipping. Rule one: No shipping. Rule two: No breaking the flow of the game or you might get screwed over. Rule three: Kill the son of a bitch.

Which means I have to get stronger. Alright, let's see if I can stand up on my own yet today – well the floor wasn't that close three seconds ago -

Ow.

That was a stupid idea, Cameron. Why would you even – never mind. Just grab onto the side of the wall. Okay, I'm swaying, but put your foot in front of your other foot - okay, I can walk. Right, I probably just stood up too fast. Let's get suited up then. Tunic, fresh pants, chain mail, sword, stupid broken ubershield.

Let's hit the training grounds.

* * *

That was the third time in as many miutes that Lon'qu's sword smashed into my side.

"You rely too much on your shield." He rumbled. "You leave your right side open."

Alright, finally some good advice. Let's see if we can adapt that into something vaguely resembling a strategy -

"Hey!"

Oh god not now. Force a smile onto your face, turn around.

"Hey, Lissa. Long time no see, was I not important enough to visit?"

Dear lord, her pout is adorable. No! Not the puppy dog eyes! Must...resist...do not apologize!

"Away, woman!"

Oh thank god, Lon'qu's still here.

...this is going to get very awkward very quickly. Well, she just latched onto his arm. Huh, he's flailing around trying to get her off.

It's not working. Wait, did her feet just leave the ground?

Okay, you know what? I'm done with this for now. I'll leave the poor guy to suffer. I'm a horrible person, I know.

I vaguely catch something about assassins as I leave. Guess we're going with that set of supports as canon, then. Actually, it's pretty good timing for it as well. Immediately after the attempt on the Exalt's life would be the perfect time for other members of the royal family to be targetted. Chrom's probably got no bodyguard because he's already badass enough – and I guess he's got an army of super-loyal fanatics like me behind him.

Did I just call myself a super-loyal fanatic? I've had like three hours in his company. He keeps wandering off without me.

Speaking of, I wonder how their missions in Ferox went. Dammit, I missed so much important plot things over the last few days. I couldn't even see if Robin had any reaction to Marth being unmasked or something.

Just because I'm not allowed to ship, doesn't mean I can't hope for it.

Let's see, where have I ended up? Erm...Why is Chrom just sitting there awkwardly?

Let's find out, shall we?

"Hey, Chrom. What's up?" Let's just get a thing rolling.

"Hm? Cameron?" Oh dear, he's all concerned. "Should you be up?"

"According to that moron of a physician your sister pays, yes." I mutter. My knees still ache, but that might be from the repeated – and failed – attempts to dodge Lon'qu's attacks. "Your turn to answer."

Chrom looked embarrassed. "Sumia ordered me to get some rest."

...this is their C support, isn't it? "She ordered you? Dear lord, you really are whipped."

"Whipped?" Oh wow, you cannot be this innocent. "I am not whipped!" Incredulous. Good, that means he understands it. I'd hate to have to explain the concept.

"Pretty sure you are, mate. What, did you fall on a pebble or something?" Awkward silence. "...dear lord she's contagious."

Chrom looks angry now. Stupid thing to say, Cameron. "There's _nothing wrong_ with her."

"Whoa there, calm down." Raise hands in submission. "Just a joke, mate."

We lapsed into an awkward silence until Sumia came back in carrying...pie?

What?

I'll just sit over here and be quiet and awkward while their B support works itself out. I wonder what my support levels are right now? I'd assume Kellam and Stahl would be approaching B or A by now, and lord knows how high Anna is. I really need to figure out what's going on there, I've only known her for a couple of weeks.

Oh, hey, Sumia's gone. "I hate rhubarb." Chrom muttered. Heh.

"Oh cheer up, it's good for you." Cheerful reply. "'sides, she shows so much concern for you. It'd be rude to not eat it."

Chrom gave me a dubious look before digging in. "...this is delicious."

I was about to ask if I could have some, but in a blink of an eye it was already gone. "How do you eat so fast?"

Chrom shrugged. "I don't know, it's just...delicious."  
...heh. Time to tease him.

"Geez, beautiful, caring and a good cook." I smirk. "Wife her. Nao."

"WHAT?!" Chrom fell backwards out of his chair. Oh lord, I just made an imgur reference. Okay, I don't think I can control this.

Laughter. Much laughter.

Sumia came back in, confused. "Chrom? Are you okay?"

I'm just going to leave now. "Don't worry, Sumia, he loved it." Ah, wipe tear from my eye and clap the confused pegasus knight on the shoulder. "I'm sure he'll make it up to you in some way."

Leave the room before she falls on something and causes you physical injury like she did the last time you actually talked to her. Wow, I need to socialize some more. Never have been good at that.

* * *

"Shepherd."

Wrex.

"Huh? Whuzzat?" I blink my eyes open. Well, I guess I must have fallen asleep out on this field. It's a nice enough day. Well, hello there Phila. "Did you forget my name again?"

"No." Phila said, probably too quickly. "I'd like to inform you that we are moving out for the Eastern Palace later today."

"H-uh." Let's see...yup, that sun's lower now. I'd say it's about two in the afternoon. "Cover of darkness?"

"Indeed."

"Hrm. Robin's put on his thinking cap for this one. Anyway-" Oh, wow, Pegasi are big. I never really noticed before but...damn. "-we all leaving to stop the Exalt from being targeted again?"

Phila nodded curtly. "Yes. Plegia isn't aware of the eastern castle, it'll be safest for her."

"Plegia's not the only thing she has to worry about." I mutter sourly. "Don't worry, I'm pretty sure Lucien doesn't either because I sure as hell didn't until you told me. 'sides, he's after me, I'll just make sure to stay away."

"It would be appreciated." Phila said wryly. Jeez, is no-one else taking the Lucien thing seriously but me? He's a frigging menace! Woman, we are talking about someone who has no way to balance out life and death in his mind! "Just make sure you don't become too obsessed with him."

...That's...am I? Very probably, actually. It's...okay, Cameron, keep training but don't make it your one thing. Don't turn into some weird version of Lelouch where you literally care about nothing other than seeing one person dead, that would be really disturbing...and far too similar to his mindset.

I feel much healthier about this whole thing now.

"I won't, I promise." Right, then, better get packing. "I'll see you later, right Phila?"

"Goodbye."

"Goodbye...what?" I smirk. Yeah, she's already flown off on her pegasus. She forgot my name again. Y'know, of all the character traits for her to have why forgetfulness? It doesn't really fit her portrayal. Maybe it's just me.

Maybe I'm just a forgettable person.

Well now I'm depressed. Wonderful, you sure do know how to bring yourself down. Finally back inside, I guess Kellam/Lon'qu/Stahl must have already packed their things because it's empty and oh for fucks sake Lucien.

That book. That...frigging...book. How dare he – I – is he seriously still trying to talk to me?!

* * *

_I netted two more yesterday. That's five people who would've lived if you hadn't decided to come here._

* * *

Was that a smash?! Oh, right, I just threw the two-way book at the nearest mirror. Damn. Well, I'm going to have to pay for that later.

"It's not my fault it's not my fault it's not my fault it's not my fault it's not-" Stop, Cameron, you've not done a mantra since you were like five and you stopped because it was stupid and childish and immature. "It. Is. Not. My. Fault."

"What's not your fault?"  
Shit.

* * *

A/N: Hey guys, sorry it's short but I kind of took a week off from FE to deal with a pair of massive writing assignments. As much as I love my english course – no, seriously, we get to read LOTR and talk about it four hours a week it's awesome – the teacher gives out frigging massive essays at the end of each 'book' (Midway point in volumes). I'm not even going to talk about my philosophy class, urgh.

ANYWAY NOBODY CARES ABOUT THAT

So yeah, this chapter was just angst and a few support conversations playing out. Sorry about that, but it needed to be shoved out of the way in order for other things.

EDIT 17/05/2013: Fixed a few things, added a sentence here or there. That's about it.

EDIT 26/05/2013: Mentioned the whole alternate timeline deal earlier on for continuity purposes.


	13. Chapter Twelve (Cam XII)

**ASLEEP**

**Warning: This chapter has much more profanity than usual, even by my standards. I recommend you go and read some fluff immediately afterwards or before.**

**Chapter Twelve – Venting**

* * *

Shitshitshitshitshit.

Okay, let's turn around and see how much damage control needs to be done.

...oh thank god, it'll be easier to explain it to her, she's got a sister guarding a frigging Outrealm Gate.

"...Anna." I'd really prefer to not have the conversation at all. "...it's nothing."

Wait what are you doing no _please don't hit me_-huh?

She brandished the book in front of my face. "What are you still doing with this?"

I try to reply, but she's already turned around and left. "Come with me."

Um.

"Anna, what are you doing?!" Protest. Run to catch up. "No, seriously, what are-"

We turn the corner to the common room – oh, thank god, none of the other shepherds are here right now - as she marches up to the fireplace, opens the grate and – wait, what are you-

The two-way book seemed to resist the fire, up until a slight screaming noise seemed to echo from its pages. Anna slammed the grate shut as it suddenly exploded into a blaze of white flames, clouds of ink being ripped from the pages and sent streaming up the chimney.

"Why would you do-"

...why does my face hurt?

Did she just _slap _me?

"Get over it, Cameron." She seems pissed. "He is NOT your fault, no matter how creepily obsessed with you he is-"

...sod it.

"He IS my fucking fault! He wouldn't even fucking exist if I hadn't decided to come to this fucking world!"

...shit, did I just say that out loud? Well, I've gone blind and deaf and all I seem to know is rage, so I really can't logic right now. Right, let's go all the way and rip off the stupid cloth covering that frigging tatoo I got in a dream...

"Do you see this Anna? D'you know what this is? I'm a frigging Outsider, I'm from another frigging planet, I can probably never go back, and showing up here means that _asshole_ was created explicitly to _fuck with me, _and he has apparently decided to do so by wandering around _**killing innocent fucking people!**_"  
"_**NO MATTER WHAT YOU FUCKING SAY, ANNA, THAT BASTARD IS MY FAULT!**_"

...Shit, now I'm just depressed.

"...five innocent people...my fucking fault."

I was embellishing when I said I couldn't see earlier, but I actually can't now, everything's blinded by tears. Huh, this carpet is nice and smooth. Jeez, Cameron, loose up the vice-grip you don't want to ruin their carpet by ripping a piece out while kneeling on the floor and crying.

...um, what is she doing?

"Anna, would you please let go-" I choke out.

"Hm. No, I don't think I will."

...this is an odd feeling. Am I meant to-

"Yes, you are."

...erm.

I slowly wrap my arms around her, completely lost as to why she's doing whatever she's doing. Anna smiles into my shoulder.

"It's not your fault. It's his, okay? Just because you made him doesn't mean you are responsible for his actions."

Yes I am.

"You're not, okay? I thought you promised Phila you wouldn't get all obsessed."

"...heh. Believing the story this quickly, huh?" I...think I'm regaining control of my own emotions and brain again. Wait, is she _hugging_ me? Why the hell is she hugging me?

"Hm. I told you my sister runs an Outrealm gate. People come through all the time." Please stop stroking my hair, you're making me feel like a child. "She's the oldest one in my family, she left a few years after I was born. We still send her some letters occasionally, but she's normally got her hands full making sure nothing bad happens."

"Heh. How'd she get that job?" I manage to smile. Anna giggles.

"Well, she kind of fell off a cliff by accident one day. Some old man saved her life and she's been working for him ever since."

Damn. "Yeah, I think I've met him. He's an ass."

"That's what she says too." Noooo, don't stop the hug, it was comforting. "Come on, let's get you cleaned up. You're a mess."

I probably do look like a mess, actually. I don't cry all sophisticated-movie-like, I just flat out bawl and my face looks terrible afterwards. "Yeah, you're probably right." I manage to chuckle. "My sister always said that crying never suited me."

"You have a sister too?" Anna raised an eyebrow as we made our way back to my barracks.

"Yeah, she's a few years younger than me. She was always the tough one. We used to joke that she'd end up saving me if someone tried to kidnap her." I smile. "It's not like with you, I only ever really had the one sister for company. My parent's couldn't imagine having more than two kids."

"It just kind of happened for us." Anna shrugged. "I don't know what possessed Dad to call us all Anna, or why Mom let him go through with it."

Oh, thank god, there's a towel here. Wipe your face, Cameron. "Hey, Anna?"

"Yeah?"

"Could you tell me more about your family?"

We ended up packing my bags together while she smiled and told me about the time Anna and Anna – the Wandering Merchant twins of the family - built a treehouse for her, only to find out she had to pay five gold for it. She told me about how that was when she developed her fascination with money, and how even her parents had gotten fed up with it at one point and demanded she go out and use her skills on someone else for a change. She was planning to follow the Twin's route and become a wandering merchant, but only ever made a few trips to Donnel's village and one to the Capital before running into me.

"Guess I should be grateful I'm a lot happier working Quartermaster here than I was trying to be like my sisters." She smiled. "My other big sister wandered around helping people, like Dad did back in the day. She's just a sword for hire, but she fights for..."

"Let me guess. JUSTICE!" I strike a stereotypical superhero pose, making her burst out into laughter.

"Yeah, just like that. She's very...excitable." Anna shrugged. "Mom didn't quite approve, but it's not like she doesn't know how to fight. She's probably better than the rest of us, actually."

That must be the other Anna you meet in one of the paralogues, then.

Well, that's the last of it. There's a conspicuous book-shaped hole at the top, but I just threw an extra shirt on top of it for now. Lucien'll probably have an aneurysm when he realizes he can't talk to me anymore.

"Well." I feel like I'm back to normal now, at least. "How much will the therapy cost me, Anna?"

Anna grinned. "Oh, it depends, but we're on a schedule so I'll have to collect later."

What?

"What do you mean, 'it depends'?" I narrow my eyes at her. "You're not putting interest on it, are you?"

Anna smirked at me and tapped her chin with her finger. "No, it depends on the restaurant you choose when we get back. I'm looking forward to it!"

..._buh?!_

I try to form some kind of coherent response, but she's already gone. Damn that woman. Damn her to hell and then right back here.

Well, my face is extremely warm. Let's just...let's just get out of here, shall we?

* * *

"How are you holding up, Cameron?"

Shut up, Vaike. Well, that's what I want to say, but to be perfectly honest the heat and the climb have pretty much removed my capacity to talk.

"Do you need Teach to carry you?" the Fighter said with a grin.

"I...hope...you get...sunburn..." I pant. He barked out a laugh and slapped his chest with a fist.

"Me? Nah, I'm used to the sun! It'll never hurt me!"

"I'll...hurt you...if you don't...shut...up..." I groan. Damn it, why did Robin have to leave us on alert during this climb? That means I've been walking up a mountain at midday with a heavy chainmail underneath a thick tunic. I'm going to die from overheating at this rate. I'm not alone in my suffering, though.

"...Hey, Gaius, are you holding up okay?" I ask the thief. He's pretty cool, but that cape he insists on wearing must be pretty damn hot.

"I want to die, Lucky." He groaned. Yeah, that nickname kind of came around after Stahl told him about all the times I should have – by all rights – either died or been crippled. "But then again, so do you. Do you think if we collapse together, they'll call a halt?"

"Nah. We're on a schedule." An equally tired Stahl said, yawning into his hand. "Tough it out, guys."

"Easy for you to say." Ricken groaned, taking off his hat to run a hand through his hair. "You don't have to walk! Will you PLEASE pick me up too?"

Stahl grinned evilly and rode up ahead. "No can do, Ricken!"

Ricken groaned as Vaike slapped him on the back. "Cheer up! You wanted to be a proper Shepherd, well here you are!"

"Yeah." I mutter. "It's a lot of walking, followed by some waiting, then a little fighting. It's mostly walking."

Kellam groaned next to me, finally raising awareness of his presence. "How do you think I feel?"

"Pretty bad." Gaius admitted. "Cheer up, Ghosty, it'll get better." He unwrapped one of his lollipops and started to suck on it thoughtfully. "Besides, how much further can it be?"

"I just hope they don't decide to turn us around." I groan, knowing fully well that's going to happen. "That means we'll have to do it again."

Ricken opened his mouth, but before he could say anything Chrom raised a hand from the plateau he'd just reached. "We're taking a break here!"

I could kiss you if Sumia wouldn't punch me for it. We barely make it up to the plateau before collapsing behind a large rock, basking in the shade. Anna stepped out of her covered wagon, grinning evilly at us as she pulled out the water rations. She tossed the first one up to Virion, who had been sitting on a platform keeping watch for potential flyers while the Pegasus Knights went ahead and scouted for ambushes.

"...I think I hate you, Moneybags." Gaius muttered as he took the offered canteen. Anna shrugged.

"What can I say? Being Quartermaster has some advantages!" She grinned. "Especially when it means I get to ride up the hill and just sleep..."

"I no longer think I hate you." Gaius deadpanned. "I do, in fact, hate you. With all my heart."

I just took mine without complaint. "Thanks, Anna."

"Don't worry about it, sweetie." She said with a wink. Well, my face is all warm again. Damn it, now Gaius and Vaike are staring at me. "I'll talk to you later, right?"

"...yeah. Later." I mumble, staring into the opened canteen. As soon as she was gone, Gaius carefully sealed his canteen and proceeded to cackle like a maniac.

"Shut up!" I protest weakly. "Just...shut up!"

Vaike grinned. "Whatever you say, _sweetie_"

The two of them fell into refreshed gales of laughter, even as Robin wandered over with a knowing grin.

"How are you holding up, Cameron?"  
"Badly." I groan. "I'm tired, sweating, sore and these two won't shut up."

Robin smirked. "Well, if it makes you feel any better, that little conversation you just had made me a few hundred gold." He held out his hand while Stahl passed, who grumbled a little before tossing him a pouch of gold. "Most people had their money on Maribelle and you."

...I offer up this mouthful of water to the gods of the spit-take, who kindly aim it right in Robin's face.

"What was that for?" Robin complained, mopping his face with the end of his tactician robe. I grinned.

"For bringing that up while I was drinking." I muttered, taking another sip of the – thankfully freezing – water. "How the hell did they get Maribelle and me? We hate each other. It's very clear that we hate each other."

Robin shrugged. "Well, Lissa's logic was something along the lines of 'dashing hero saves reluctant noblewoman, who then proceeds to do something incredibly brave and stupid', but to be perfectly honest we could all tell that Maribelle really just isn't attracted to you at all."

I don't know whether to take that as a compliment or an insult, so I'll just play it safe and not take either side for now. "It's not like it matters. We haven't even gone on a date yet."

"No, she just consoled you for over two hours." Kellam deadpanned from next to me. "I was in the room."

"...you have got to be kidding me!" Oh, god, which room. "The entire time?"

"Well, I got back just as you two came in to pack. You looked like a mess." Kellam shrugged.

"How the hell did we miss you – how did – I just...how?!"

I sit there, flabbergasted at how much of a massive failure that must have been for me. I actually don't understand how I missed him.

"You know what?" I finish my canteen and stand up. "I'm done. I'm going to go talk to Lon'qu."

"Didn't Anna go that way, Bubbles?" Gaius said with a smirk. Robin grinned.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure she did." He gave me a mock salute. "Those without love salute your courage!"

"Screw you guys!" I mutter, tossing the empty canteen at Gaius' head. Their laughter echoed in my ears as I stormed off to find the one person who wouldn't even try to broach this subject.

"Hey, Lon'qu!" I wave. Wow, he doesn't even look flustered. "How are you holding up?"

"I am fine." He replies with a small smile. "The heat here is nothing compared to Regna Ferox in this time of year."

I chuckle. He's probably right, I always got a vaguely African vibe off of Ferox. Except for the gate, where it was snowing for some reason.

"Yeah, you're probably right. I've never been to Ferox, is it a nice enough place?"

Lon'qu frowned, memories coming back. "In its own way. It is hot and dry one minute, and covered in snow the next. It is...most interesting."

Huh. That's the most – oh no.

"Lon'quuuu!"

Please not her. Not right now. Lon'qu seemed to share my sentiments, but not for the same reasons.

"Away, woman." He grunted. "The entire army is here, you are surely well protected enough without me!"

Lissa pouted at him. Oh, wow, that pout can make even the great Lon'qu fail. "But Chrom said you were to guard me at all times..."

I really don't know if I should come to his rescue or not. On one hand, it'll save the poor guy. On the other...two...hands...I love this pairing AND I really don't want Lissa to start teasing me and all.

Two to one, time to get out of here. I raise my hands in apology to Lon'qu and start to sidle away quietly.

"Cameron. Why are you leaving?"

...you asshole! Lissa turned to me, eyes all wide and oh wow how is it possible to look like an Anime character in real life? I keep expecting her to say 'uguu' or something now...

"Caaam!"

Nonononono not the tackle hug OH GOD!

I grimace as I land heavily on my shield. Damn, that's painful. "Lissa. Please...get off..."

Lissa bounced back up almost immediately as I took my time trying to stand up. My legs are tired, and my muscles do not want to respond to me. Lissa opened her mouth – probably to go either all fangirl or try to tell me off for not going after Maribelle, can't tell which – and I give up trying to stand. How could this get any worse?

"To arms!" Virion yelled from his perch on top of Anna's wagon. "Wyvern Riders! Dozens of them!"

Of course.

* * *

A/N: I'm not happy with the opening bit, but it had to be done. It'll probably get revised later. On the other hand, I really like how the march turned out. Also, I think I may have overused the ... in the opening half. Meh, I'll fix it later. I don't want to go too long without updating. Speaking of, I should probably do something with Time Matters Not...meh, I'm sure one of those three half-finished chapters in that folder will have writers block removed eventually. Here's another Alt-POV paralogue as thanks for 100 reviews (Holy crap I never thought that'd be something I said after only two months of writing this):

EDIT 17/05/2013: Fixed a few spelling errors and stuff.

* * *

**Asleep**

**Paralogue: Phila I**

At one thousand feet above the army, they are barely even visible. I know full well that Chrom and his men are capable of defending the Exalt, yet I remain concerned. There is something...off about that new recruit of his. Like he knew there was going to be an assassination attempt that night. It isn't likely that he is collaborating with that man – Lucien, was it? - but he could state firmly that Lucien wasn't working for Plegia. One option is that he is, in fact, working for Plegia himself.

I may be overthinking it. He seems honorable enough, but I cannot trust Her Highness' life just based on a gut instict when such possibilities exist. Still, I hope that he is on our side. His skill is undeniable, although he is still weaker than the rest of the Shepherds. He could be holding back, though...after all, when you reach a certain peak it becomes hard to hold back to the point where you look weak enough.

Wait. There, in the distance.  
"Commander!"

"I see them, Daya." It cannot be a coincidence. They should not know of this path... "We fly back to the collumn. Defend the Exalt!"

After this battle, the Shepherd and I are having a talk.

...I just wish I could remember his name.


	14. Chapter Thirteen (Cam XIII)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Thirteen – Breaking Wings**

This is probably the worst thing that could happen to me right now. Actually, no, scratch that, Lucien isn't involved so there's that at least. Still, the situation is pretty bad. We're tired, sore, hot and caught by surprise.

Not to mention, didn't Cherche's supports mention that the Wyvern's could breathe fire now? Man, that would suck. I really hope I'm remembering it wrong.

_OH GOD I DIDN'T_

If there is a god, it hates me. I'm glad I managed to dive down in time, the first swoop over would have incinerated me, broken shield or not. Damn, I hope it didn't get anyone else – buh?

One of the wyvern's and its rider smashed down next to me, arrows sticking out of its neck. The rider was dead on impact. I stagger up to my feet, and turn to see what just happened.

Virion stood on top of the supply cart, drawing and firing arrows at quite frankly ludicrous speed. I guess he wasn't all just talk then – archest of archers, indeed. Still, Virion's kill seemed to give Chrom the time he needed.

"Rally! Protect the Exalt! Robin, we need a plan and we need it now!"

I could feel myself rise to my feet with a grin. Okay, we are officially back in the game as of right now. Alright, time to cause some serious damage – oh, crap, I don't have ranged weapons. Do I have to wait for them to _charge _me?

This sucks.

Ricken and Miriel stepped forwards, gusts of wind slashing through the wings of approaching wyvern's and forcing some of them to land further down the mountain. Chrom ran through the plateau, rallying us footsloggers to form a defensive line. I ended up lodged in between Donnel and Vaike of all people.

"So." I smirk and draw my sword, checking it for damage. "Last to ten buys the others a drink?"

"Ah'm a little young ta be drinking" Donnel said, gripping his lance.

"And yet here you are, about to be charged by angry axemen." I shrug. "I'm pretty sure Chrom would let it slide. Besides, you'll be buying, not drinking."

Vaike let out a bark. "Ha! I like the sound of free drinks!"

Yup, this seems to be a thing I've started now. I manage to make out Robin's voice despite the roars of both wyverns and flames.

"At twenty paces, cavalry, counter-charge and disengage! Archers and Mages, focus on keeping their air support away from our healers! Lissa, Maribelle, Anna, get ready to help the cavalry when they come back! Ground troops, charge as soon as the cavalry disengage! Ready?"

Seems like a fairly straightforward plan for once. We let out a roar of approval as the enemy reached the thirty-pace mark.

We stepped to the side and allowed the cavaliers, headed up by Frederick, to break through our lines and smash into the enemy. On the charge, they must have hit a decent number of them. A few slashes with their swords and they managed to disengage, leaving the dismounted Wyvern Riders disorganized and confused. Chrom chopped forwards with Falchion just as the three of them thundered back. I think something hit Stahl. I'll have to check on him later – OH GOD THEY'RE ONLY FIVE PACES AWAY CONCENTRATE.

Naturally, the first one is met with my sword to his surprised face. Oh, shit, there's brains everywhere. Damn, that's nasty. Ugh, I am never cutting someone's skull in half again. Fine, you'll just have to live with a shield bash off the edge of this cliff second man – was that the Wilhelm scream?  
What the hell? People actually _make _that noise?

DAMN! Okay, no time to ponder, Cameron, that guy almost took your head off. Let's just – okay, I guess we could just stab him. Okay, brief respite. Hey, there's Vaike.

"Hey, Vaike! Three already!"

Vaike turns and grins, tossing one of them off the cliff with his free hand without even breaking a sweat. "I'm on twelve! Sucks to be you!"

My wallet can't take this abuse, not with Anna as a potential significant other. Donnel fell back next to me, panting.  
"Ah'm only on two."

My wallet doesn't _have _to take this abuse! Awesome! This news gives me strength!

Holy crap, it actually gave me strength. I just piled through those guys right now. Suckers! Not sure if I actually killed any of them, but it was awesome while it lasted. Well, then.

Wings, flapping wings, here comes another one – oh, crap! Did I almost kill Cordelia?

"Captain Chrom! There are more coming from behind!"

I forgot about them. Oh dear lord.

This could be troublesome. Cordelia just flew off, probably to find and warn Phila as well. Just as the promised enemy reinforcements arrived, Phila and her Pegasus knights slammed into them and began their deadly dance in the sky.

A few more minutes raged on and wow these guys are just not on our level are they?

The thing is, deprived of their mounts thanks to Robin's strategy of disrupting the air to make it too dangerous to fly, they are pretty much reduced to mediocre foot soldiers. Sort of like how Sumia is a goddess while riding her Pegasus, but as soon as she tries to fight on foot she's tripping over everything. This is actually almost _boring_.

"We've got them on the run!" Chrom proclaimed, waving Falchion in the sky. "Push them back!"

Robin ran up to us, panting. "Phila's air troops are winning in the sky as well. We shouldn't have to fight for much longer."

He glanced up to the sky, his eyes widened, and he spun to Chrom with a panicked look on his face. "Chrom! Drop your sword, turn to the left by two paces, and hold out your arms!"

It says a lot about Chrom's trust in his tactician at this point that he obeyed instantly, even as he raised an eyebrow curiously. "Robin, is this the time to -"

Cordelia fell into his arms with a shriek, Chrom catching her perfectly. Chrom blinked as he realized what Robin had asked him to do. He gently let go of the stuttering Cordelia – wow, she must be having a seizure or something after that episode – and grinned at us. "Okay, Robin, I caught her-"

There was a sickening crunch as Cordelia's pegasus landed on top of him. Wince in sympathy, jeez...that had to hurt.

Wait, wasn't this what happened to Hector back in Rekka no Ken? Huh, guess history – is it history? How many of the games were brought into continuity in this one and how many were still Alternate Universes again? - has a way of repeating itself. Chrom staggered to his feet as the surprisingly uninjured pegasus managed to get off him. Robin groaned and facepalmed. "Cameron, could you take him up to the healers? He may have broken something."

Chrom didn't protest. It wasn't like he was really needed here anymore, what was left of this fight could have been solo'd by a half-decent Lon'qu if he was here. I guess Vaike and Donnel will have to do.

"Sure thing." I grin. Exemption from stupid bet that I was probably going to loose! "I was getting fed up with loosing money."

"Shouldn't have gotten together with Anna, then." There will come a time when you are with somebody, hopefully Lucina, Robin. I will not forget this day.

Do you understand me, Robin? I will _ruin you_ for this.

We staggered back up to the healers, Cordelia trying to apologize for what happened despite her little problem of not really having the ability to use language around Chrom. It sounds like everything's winding down perfectly. No casualties for us, hopefully Phila's troops haven't taken any either.

You know, one of these days someone is going to die and it'll suck. Especially if it's me, that would really suck. Actually it might be better than anyone else because at least then I wouldn't have to grieve.

Crap, they would. Well they would anyway and why the hell am I thinking this to myself? Think about something else, damn.

We finally stagger into the healing tent, where Lissa and Mariabelle whisk Chrom and Cordelia away. Lon'qu is standing awkwardly in a corner talking to oh my god Emmeryn is trying to talk to him this is hilarious.

"I would like to thank you for protecting my sister." Emmeryn said calmly. "She means the world to me."

Lon'qu was sweating bullets at this point and stared pleadingly at me. Payback's a bitch, asshole.

"...it's nothing." He muttered. Wow, I could practically hear his mental screams. I almost feel sorry for him, but he attempted to redirect Lissa's fangirl mode towards me so he can suck it up.

Emmeryn smiled serenly. "You are placing yourself in danger for another's sake, despite your fears. It is something to be commended."

Okay, fine, I'll save you, jeez. "Yo, Lon'qu!"

The stoic face was replaced by sheer glee for a second.

"Yes?"  
"I'm going to go and check the border of the camp, make sure no-one got through. You coming?"

Lon'qu nodded furiously, almost running towards me. Emmeryn actually chuckled.

"You are committed to your duty...and your friends."

Well. "Yeah, I guess I am at that."

We leave the tent and start wandering around. The rest of the shepherds were trudging back up, all looking pretty battered but all of them were there. In the sky, Phila and her troops swooped down to greet us all.

Why is she glaring at me? Eh, doesn't matter. I'll keep moving.

We moved around the camp in total silence. I guess he isn't talkative even with guys, is he. Ah, well, can't complain there. The silence is good. We completed the rounds and returned to the center of the camp, where Virion was being carried around on Stahl's shoulders.

"Man of the hour! Archest of archers!" He proclaimed, standing tall. Stahl rolled his eyes at me and started to smirk. "Now, now, my ladies, do not fall over yourselves in your hurry! I shall-"

Stahl kicked his horse into a gallop, and Virion fell off the cavalier with a shriek.  
"Hey, archest of archers" I grin, helping him up. "How'd the victory lap go?"

"You wound me, good sir." He grumbled. "Wound me deeply."

"I'm sure I do. Come on, we'll probably be getting debriefed soon-ish."

The bruised and dirtied noble fell behind me, grumbling about his crushed pride. We wandered into the healing tent just as Cordelia was finishing her story.

"...they were my family...oh, gods..."

Right. Yes. That needs to be adressed before PTSD develops to an extreme. Hopefully I'll be able to talk to her, or someone else will beat me to it.

"Monsters." Chrom snarled. Wow, you are coming off as a lot angrier than you do in-game, are you okay pal? Phila sighed and began talking to them in hushed tones. Robin nodded, a dark look on his face.

"I thought so." I overheard. Wait, why did he just glance at me?

Oh, crap, they think I'm a traitor. Wonderful. Emmeryn just took a step forward and told Phila off – or at least, I think that's what she did – and Phila backed down, scowling a little. Well, I guess that means I've got the Exalt on my side for now. It'll all blow over when Phila dies oh for fuck's sake Cameron.

That's the kind of thought that Light Yagami uses to justify his actions in Death Note, you are not a lunatic with a god complex. Robin's done with the conversation, and turns to us – then Emmeryn speaks up.

"I'll return to Ylisstol."

And all hell breaks loose again. For crying out loud, can we all just agree on something for once? Is that too much to ask?

You know, I'm getting a little fed up with this. Should I – is it really appropriate for me to – could someone please – sod it.

"SHUT UP!"

Well, now I've got everyone looking at me. Robin sighed and rubbed his temples.

"Here we go again..."

Oh shut the hell up you snarky bastard. "Could we maybe hear her logic before diving at each other's throats like angry hellhounds? Thank you!"

I am so done with this army. Emmeryn blinked and smiled.

"Thank you. The people will need their leader if Plegia is already within our borders."

Robin raised a hand. "Okay, problems with this argument. I can find three. Permission to state them?"

Emmeryn nodded. "Go ahead."

"Okay, One: There could be more wyvern riders in the countryside."

"I shall have Phila's troops accompanying me."

"Two: If you get killed or captured the morale will drop far more than your presence will raise it."

"If I am not present, Plegia may be less willing to negotiate and will randomly attack peasants occupying Ylisstol."

Robin nodded grudgingly, conceding the points. "Okay, fine. Three: We don't know who the traitor that leaked our position is."

This was met by quiet muttering in the crowd. Phila's glaring at me again. Son of a bitch, she really does think I'm the traitor. Isn't it the Heirarch?

Emmeryn smiled.

"Well, even if I remain with you they will know in that case."

Robin opened and closed his mouth for a few seconds, narrowed his eyes, and sighed. "Fine. I guess you're right."

Did Robin the Genius just _lose an argument_? Holy crap, so that's why Emmeryn makes a good Exalt. She's smart.

Chrom and Lissa started protesting on a personal basis, but to be honest I'm really not interested in that. I'm just going to wander off over here and...wait.

We're going to have to walk back down the mountain now. Dammit.

* * *

A/N: I'll have another one out for the weekend to make up for this one's length. Also, you should all go and read Deliverance by Lex of Light. I hate Robin/Tharja (Okay, mostly just Tharja) but he's rapidly redeeming her in my eyes and it's a really fun read.

After this week, if updates slow down it's because I'll be busy with production assignments for Scriptwriting and Video Workshop. The pro of being a Cinema student is no exams, so once May hits I'll be able to update like a lunatic again.


	15. Chapter Fourteen (Cam XIV)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Fourteen – Between A and S**

Well this is something the game never really expanded on. We've been walking along this road for the past week, and we still haven't made it into Regna Ferox. It's actually becoming quite irritating, especially because we probably don't learn about Emmeryn's capture until the events of the game line up again.

Which means we've been walking...walking...and walking...with the Heirarch still at the front of the column, instead of disappearing after the events of the last battle like in the game. I guess not all changes brought on by my presence are good – and not just the fact that the _mass murdering ass hole__** is still waNDERING AROUND**_ deep breaths Cameron, deep breaths.

It's really not helped by the fact that I recently learned his name was Lord Baelish, which just makes me dislike him even _more_, because he is in no way Littlefinger's equal on the political backstabbing scale. I mean, seriously, all that quaking before the attack? What the hell? I mean, I'm no George Smiley, but I'm pretty sure I'd be able to bust him open if I tried. It's just that he's more likely to expose himself than I am to expose him.

And now I'm treating my life like it's House of Cards or something like that. Dear lord, is this really how bored I am from all of this walking? Imagining myself into a political thriller? It could be worse, I guess.

Wait, is that a town? Oh thank lord, it is a town. It's not the giant gate next to Regna Ferox, but hell, I'll take it.

Up at the front of the column, Robin and Chrom seemed to have a quick discussion amongst themselves. Lord Baelish added in a point of his own, and Chrom nodded thoughtfully. Robin threw his hands into the air, but it appeared to be in good humour and not frustration.

I hope.

"Alright, then. Good news everyone!" Robin cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted down the line. "We're going to rest overnight in this village!"

I really do want to hug you right now. Even Lon'qu managed to crack a smile from next to me.

"Good."

"You do realize that means that you'll have to wander around with Lissa again, right?" Stahl said without missing a beat, his horse trotting past. Lon'qu froze in his steps.

"Damn."

Okay, I officially have a group of bros. Me, Stahl, Gaius and Lon'qu have spent most of this march talking to each other, and yeah an entire week of doing nothing but walking and talking tends to create a bond of some kind.

I think I'm forgetting someone though. Eh, it's probably not important.

The four of us started laughing at Lon'qu's face, which was frozen in fear. Wait, four?

_Oh come on! This joke is getting old!_

Right, Kellam. I forgot about Kellam. Again.

How the hell do I keep doing that? Let's just keep walking for now, the town's only a blip.

* * *

Forgetting one of my best friends, jeez. That's a brand-new low. At the very least it wasn't something he noticed this time. That would've been humiliating. The town's much closer, and Chrom already sent Sumia and Cordelia up to arrange sleeping arrangements or something like that. Which means actual beds.

I'm getting tired, and an actual bed sounds amazing, the best I've been doing so far was that one pach of sand that was surprisingly comfy. Then I woke up to find myself buried up to my neck, and Vaike had to dig me out. Not one of my prouder moments.

Remembering that must have made me flush a little, I'm getting all warm. Then again, it is just rather hot out here. I should probably pick up the pace a little, a rest sounds really good.

Easy now Cameron, there's no point in wasting your energy.

We're almost there. Come on, just a few minutes more. I think. Unless something goes horribly wrong.

Anna. Oh, damn, I promised to take Anna out to dinner in the next town. Was that basically how that conversation went? I think so. Maybe she meant one in Ylisstol. Ah, the trials of...love?

Love? Crap, Cameron, get over yourself, you haven't even had one successful date in your life up to this point. This isn't going to be some cliche'ed romance with no character development, you are going to have to work with this wonderful woman, even if it...

Kills me? Yeah, let's go with that. Well, not in a literal sense of course, but it works.

Well, it's not like my life here sucks to the point where she's the only redeeming point. I've got my friends now, and a somewhat stimulating intellectual challenge in the form of Not-Littlefinger over there.

It'll be interesting to say the least. Wait, we're almost there

That's us crossing the village line now. We are officially back in civilisation. Oh, I could kiss you sweet sweet dirt.

However, there'll be time for that later. I've got to focus on the current situation what with the whole 'Robin and Chrom suspect I might be a traitor' thing.

Maybe it'll all work out somehow. Maybe. I'm not sure how good of a plan it is to count on someone else messing up, but if I make any kind of open move they might be onto something. Ugh, this is so much more complicated than Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy made it look and sound. I'll have to move carefully here, maybe avoid interacting with Baelish at all and try to move around him through second-hand information, but that could backfire horribly if he catches on to me. I'm convinced his motivations have changed from survival to pure concentrated let's-mess-around-with-everyone. Wait, where's everybody gone?

Everyone else is piling up into that inn over there. Did I seriously just stand here and think to myself for five minutes? Really? It wasn't even that long of a tangent!

"Guys, wait for me!"

* * *

Stahl and I both fall forwards onto our rented beds with a groan.

"This is perfect." Stahl groaned. I nodded in sleepy agreement.

"I know, right?"

Lon'qu moved to sit on the end of his, but Lissa burst through the door. I managed to catch a little bit of the conversation, but to be perfectly honest I don't really care. I'm way too tired. Lon'qu sulked through the door, brushing past Kellam as they left.  
"He's going to die." Stahl said with a sigh. Yeah, he probably is, but we can't bring ourselves to care. Besides, he's sufficiently badass to save himself if required, his A support has him basically solo-ing an entire archer company. Oh, wait, he can't hit women outside of a serious combat scenario.

Stupid compassion for my friends. Let's just force myself out of this bed, and...well, I just slumped back down. Sorry, Lon'qu, looks like you're on your own.

Kellam's bed sank down as he probably sat on it. No, it's not that I can't see him, I've just got my head buried into my pillow and I'm already sinking away into sleep.

* * *

Oh _come on_

"Seriously?"  
The Old Man stares at me with a grin, nodding. Just wonderful.

"Okay, well then. I'm back in this hellhole again." I mutter, looking around the blue void. He shrugged.

"It could be worse. It could be the Black Lodge."

"I really do not need reminded of the works of David Lynch right now." I hiss, secretly thankful that it wasn't. The Old Man smirked knowingly and pointed towards a table.  
"Shall we begin?"  
"We might as well." I moan, sitting down in front of him. "What are we playing this time?"

The Old Man shuffled some decks and put them in front of me. "Netrunner. Corporation or Runner?"

"Runner." I sigh and take the deck on the right. "Okay, what are we talking about this time then?"

The Old Man shrugged and drew his first few cards. "Oh, you know, this and that. Mostly how you cocked up and got yourself placed under suspicion of treason."

"What was I supposed to do?" I frowned. "Let Phila find out about the attack too late?"

"Not run off on your own and place yourself under suspicion..." The Old Man sighed. "...not meet Lucien."  
"Not talking about him." I growl, slamming down my first few cards. "I'll make a run on R&D"

He rolled his eyes and went through the motions. "We kind of need to. You weren't meant to meet him yet."

"I'm sure."

"No, you really weren't. He went out looking for you earlier than expected. It was...irritating." The Old Man's forehead creased in concentration. "Anna most definetly wasn't meant to throw your book into the fire, either."

"And what are you basing this off of?" Casual question, but he took on a brief look of panic. "I wasn't in the original timeline."

The blue void began to vanish rapidly as the Old Man rose to his feet, shaking his head. "Not a question you were supposed to ask."

The blue was replaced with water, which flooded the room. He faded from view just before the first wave overtook my face and -

* * *

"GAAAAAAAAH!"

Why is it freezing?

Why am I wet?

_Why is Gaius laughing?!_

"Gaius." I glare at the bucket-holding thief. "I'm going to kill you. Stand still for me."

"Woah, Lucky. Calm down." He grinned, raising his hands in a peace gesture. "I was just sent to tell you to get all pretty."

"...what for?" Oh. Crap.

Gaius' grin grew larger and he started to shake with repressed laughter. "I...sorry...just..." He pulled out a lollipop and stuck it in his mouth, giving it a brief suck and cleared his throat. Robin, who'd been standing next to him, took over.

"Cameron, report to the Quatermaster's room immediately."

_These assholes_

"I hate you both." I hauled myself to my feet and rummaged through my kitbag for a dry shirt. "Especially you, Gaius."

Pulling on the black dress shirt, stuffing my soon-to-be-empty wallet down the cuff pocket, I presented them with my favorite finger as I left the room, accompanied by roaring laughter as Robin and Stahl finally lost control. Then I finally realized what I was getting into, remembered that I've never done this before and if you'll excuse me I'll just start screaming in my mind now.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

"Hey, Chrom, do you know which room Anna's in?"

"Hm? Oh, it's at the end your left. Good luck."

"...Thank you?"

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

Knock twice.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

"Just a second."

Was that CordeliaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

CALM DOWN FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. They just made Cordelia room with Anna and probably another girl too, it's nothing to get worked up about. Oh, no, wait, that was you still panicking.

"Oh, hey. She'll be ready for a second."  
And now the panic is replaced by ice-cold terror. "Er, thanks."  
Cue awkward silence as the two of us just kind of stand there. Well, this'll probably make it worse, but "So, how are you holding up?"

Cordelia started and looked away. "I'm fine."

Ugh, fine, make it difficult. "I'm never going to see my family again either, Cordelia. I was seriously going to fall apart at the seams at one point. Bottling it up isn't going to help. You really should talk to someone about it."  
Cordelia gave me a confused look, when I was suddenly yanked away by a red blur. I confess that I didn't really catch much of the next few seconds except that Anna was dragging me down the hall by my wrist, making me run to keep up with her, and we almost trampled Ricken on the way out.

All of this was accompanied by Vaike's laughter, as he'd been standing right next to the exit.

Ass.

"Anna, slow down!" I manage to gasp out. Alright, we've slowed to a brisk walk instead of full-out running. Well, now, that's a nice dress. It's...okay, yeah, it's the Radiant Dawn sprite. I'll be honest, I was kind of expecting something a little more flamboyant seeing as she has so much cash lying around. Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if she's basically Haley from Order of the Stick and sits around polishing it as a hobby.

"Why?" She smiled and tapped her chin. "Out of breath?"

"We spent all day marching." I mutter. "We finally get a chance to have some sleep, I manage to grab an hour, and then Gaius decides to soak me in cold water."

"You spent all day marching." She winked. "I rode here in the supply cart."

"Oh ha ha milady." I groan. "Some of us are footsloggers, you know?"

She laughed, grabbed my wrist again, and now we're going in another direction. "Come on, then!"  
"What's all the rush anyway?" I get out before we turn the corner. Oh. Of course she'd find a market. She grins up at me.  
"I figured I might as well pick up some inventory for cheap while we're here." She tilted her head. "And _you _are here to see if we can pull out any couple's specials."

"Of course I am." I really should have seen that coming. "And afterwards...?"  
"_Then _you can take me to dinner, okay? I found the best place already-"

I'll have to settle that then wait what? "Anna, how expensive is this place?"  
She just smiled at me. My wallet may very well have shed actually tears.

"Miss! Come look at this fine sample of Spirit Dust!"  
"Sir! You look like the kind who would appreciate a strong Dracoshield! Protect the pretty lady, am I right?"

Looks like all those item power-ups from the game were actual physical objects too, interesting. Anna gave the merchant a smile and looked at the small clay pot with the spirit dust in it, nodding thoughtfully. "How much?"

"Two thousand five hundred gold" The merchant grinned. Anna's innocent smile was replaced with the much more familiar sly one.

"It's not worth a silver above One and a Half thousand."

And so began the greatest haggling I ever lay witness to. Ever. Of all time.

"This comes all the way from a great monastery in Valm!"  
"Don't make me laugh, real undiluted spirit dust doesn't sparkle, it glows. This sparkles, it's clearly designed for the manufacturing of low-end tomes instead of boosting magical power!"

Oh, that's what it's for. It's kind of like tome ink. That...makes sense.

"Will you take it for two thousand three hundred if I throw in a necklace?" He offered weakly. Looks like he's beaten.  
"Two thousand two hundred and fifty more like." She said with a smirk. The merchant groaned and nodded weakly, handing over the silver necklace and the small clay pot. Anna counted out the two thousand gold extremely quickly and handed it over, turning to me with a smile. "Put it on me?"

I roll my eyes at the exceedingly sweet tone in her voice before sighing and taking the necklace, giving the small glass charm at the end a brief look.

You know, I probably shouldn't have bothered, because that's the Eye of Isha. Well, weird warhammer crossover aside, it's just a stained glass charm at the end of a silver chain, so let's just hook it over and ooh her skin is smooth.

Stop thinking about it.

"Thank you." She smiled, turning back around to face me. "How's it look?"

Oh dear god I hate this question so much. I mean, the answer is obvious. She looks great but there's no way of telling how she'll react and then I'm in deep -

"Anna, stop teasing the guy." I swear I've heard that voice before. Anna obviously had too, because she's all happy.

"ANNA!"  
You have got to be kidding me. Anyway, Anna is off hugging...erm...oh wow I have triple vision. I guess those must be the merchant twins she was talking about.

I'm really handling this quite well, to be honest, I thought my brain would shut down when presented with three identical copies of her and there it goes.

"Hey, are you okay?" One of the Anna's waved her hand in front of my face. Okay, brain? There's Anna, Merchant Anna 1, and Merchant Anna 2. That's how we're labeling it for the duration of this conversation.

Jesus, it was bad enough that they were all called Anna, they didn't need to go and throw twins into the mix.

"Sorry, I'm just...tired. We marched all morning." Smile, Cameron, do not upset the family. That would never end well if you did.

"Oh? Well, Anna seems just fine." Merchant Anna 1 said with a smile.  
"Yeah, she rode in a cart all the way here."  
"Aww, are you more upset that you had to walk..." Merchant Anna 2 said while standing to the other side of me.

"...or that you weren't in a small space with her for all morning?" Merchant Anna 1 finished. Well, that's...incredibly inappropriate.

"That's incredibly inappropriate."  
Good job brain! Good frigging job!

The Anna's sighed. "Well, looks like you found yourself a starch boy Anna." Merchant Anna 1 said sadly.

"Yeah, he's no fun at all." Merchant Anna 2 agreed. "It's not even like he'll be rich once you're done with him."

"Mm. That last guy was almost homeless. Mom had a fit."

Anna glared at them until they stopped.

"Okay, there was no last guy. We made that up to see how you'd react." Merchant Anna 1 admitted. "Good job for not flinching or anything."

I want out of this conversation as soon as possible, and that wasn't so much a concentrated effort as it was my brain melting down from the stupidity of this situation.

Wait.

"You've never been on a -"

Anna shook her head in embarrassment. Well.

Chuckling made her look up in surprise. "What are you laughing about?"

"It's just that...I was worried about not being able to match any other times you've been out and...pwahaha!"

Yeah, I'm crazy, they're all looking at me like I'm crazy. Um.

"...sorry, it's just the absurdity of how much I've been worrying over this caught up to me. I guess you'll want to catch up, so-urk."

Did she just grab my collar?

"They'll be here tomorrow, I'll say I need to restock and visit them." Anna said with a smirk. "You are not getting out of this so easily."

"See you tomorrow, sis!" Merchant Anna 1 waved as I was tugged down a side street. "Try not to abuse him too much!"  
I think I'm going to die from embarrassment.

* * *

Well, I didn't, which is the good news. But now I'm sitting across the table from a beautiful woman in a restaurant that made my wallet die just from looking at it and I honestly have no idea how I'm meant to act at this point.

"So..." Anna said, clearly feeling as awkward as I did. We'd already ordered a while ago, me going for a simple pasta dish with a surprisingly reasonable cost and her...she...

...orange duck was involved and that was the LEAST expensive thing that was in that order. I'm seriously starting to consider asking Robin for a pay rise.

"Yeah. Dinner." I mutter awkwardly.  
"Yeah."

We sat there for a few seconds before Anna sighed. "So, what do you think of my family?"  
Of all potential topics, it had to be this one. "They're nice enough, if a little...overwhelming."

Anna raised an eyebrow dramatically. "Are you always this careful with how you say things?"

"Only on Mondays, or when talking to a beautiful woman."  
Anna raised an eyebrow. "Oh, so you think I'm beautiful?"  
"It's not Monday." I shrug. Nice! Flawless execution! Reward: Anna flushing and avoiding eye contact. The awkward silence continues for a few more seconds.

"You...clean up nice yourself."  
"I didn't clean up. Gaius threw a bucket of water over me and I put a dress shirt on." I deadpanned, making her laugh a bit.

"Well, then I anticipate seeing you with prep time."

"I'm sure I'd be unrecognizable."

The food finally arrived, and the silence was replaced by eating and small talk.

"I didn't know you liked pasta." Anna said between bites. "You always went straight for the meat whenever Donnel managed to bring some back."

"It's less of a preference and more of a budgetary thing." This Alfredo _is _really good though. Wait, how the hell do they have Alfredo in Fire Emblem...? "My parents always raised me to avoid spending too much money on my own food."

"And you're paying for me because...?" She took a sip of the white wine she'd ordered and raised an eyebrow.

"Because you're not me and they never said I couldn't spoil someone else."

"You're sweet." She said with a small smile. "And probably too generous for your own good."

"Oh no I'm not. I'm a tight little bugger when it comes to money." I mutter to myself. "Although my control over it has lessened since you showed up."  
"I'm special that way." She said with a laugh. "What can I say? Money just wants to come to me instead of stay with their owner."

This is actually going surprisingly well. And, for once in my life, it stays that way right through until the end of the meal and we leave, my wallet much lighter.

"I'll pay for the next one." Anna said with a light laugh. "It'll take you time to recover."  
"You've got that right." I mutter with a small sigh. It'd gotten dark, and the market was shut down for the day. Only a few stars had shown up, but it was a clear night none the less.

"Cameron?"  
"Hm?"  
Something warm and soft slipped inside my hand. Um. Okay, if we're doing this, then...fine. Wow, her skin really is soft.

"You're blushing."  
"I am not!"  
"Yes, you are." Anna said with a giggle. "You're bring red."

I turn to mock-glare at her, and then smirk instead. "So are you."

Anna looked back with a smile, her breath misting in the cold air. We must be getting closer to Regna Ferox than I thought. "I'm getting cold."  
"You should have worn something with sleeves, then." I shot back. Yeah, I wasn't passing that down. Oh, god, she's pressing up against me.

"Why? You're warm enough."

Um.

Okay then.

The rest of the walk passes in comfortable silence until we finally come to the inn, which we enter to...thunderous applause.

OH, GOD DAMN IT YOU GUYS!  
"And here we see the triumphant Wandering Adventurer!" Robin said with a wave of his arm. "If you look closely, you can see his face leap between embarrassment and a second emotion we have yet to identify!"  
"It's anger, Robin. At you." I said, surprisingly calm. "You know, this night WAS going well until you lot decided to pull this."  
"Pull what?" Gaius asked innocently. "I was just teaching them how to play poker..."

"Which led to us getting robbed blind by Lord Baelish..." Stahl yawned. The noble sat there with a smug grin on his face.

Bastard.

"I fear that the only competent player here is Gaius, sir knight." The bastard said with a smile. "I have just developed this poker face through years of politics."  
"Hm. Nasty things, never did like 'em." Gaius said with a shrug. Chrom sighed and stood up.

"Well, I think I'll retire. And remember, you two – you have separate rooms. The last thing we need is our quartermaster getting pregnant."  
GAH.

Gaius, Robin and Stahl fell over laughing as the prince left with a grin.  
"Oh, that was perfect." Gaius said, wiping a tear from his eye. "That was absolutely perfect. Looks like Blue has a sense of humor after all, right Bubbles?"  
"Yeah." Robin said with a grin. "He really does."

"I hate all of you and I hope you die." I say calmly. Gaius shrugs.

"Not the first time you said that, it won't be the last."

I groan and turn to face Anna. "So, well, that was...fun"  
"Yeah." She said with a smile, obviously having a lot more fun with this situation than I was. "We better do that again sometime. Well...goodnight?"  
"Yeah. Goodnight." Why is she standing there and what does she want me to do? Whatever, I've got to deal with these idiots.

"Clueless." I heard her sigh before she grabbed the back of my shirt, pulled me around and then down the half a foot to get to my – Oh. OH. I'm an idiot.

Mhmph. Er, where do my hands go right now? Right, her...waist I guess?

This is...okay, now that I'm past the shock of what's happening this is actually really...I can't describe this, it's just wonderful. It felt like we were there for hours before Chrom cleared his throat from behind us.

"What did I _just _tell you two?"

We separated in an instant, more than a little mortified. The prince of Ylisse stared at us until we awkwardly went down the hallway to our rooms, muttering a small goodbye as I reached my door first. WOW that was like something out of a high school romance film. Especially the awkward walk at the end.

I can still hear them laughing. Assholes.

That bed looks so inviting now. I guess I'll just change out of the dress shirt and go to sleep now.

That sounds like an...amazing...idea...

* * *

A/N: Any weird crap and/or references going on in this chapter were brought on by listening to Weird Al Yankovich during the writing.

This was going to be much shorter, then Anna's siblings showed up, then I decided to go back and include an easter egg for anyone with the patience and surprising amount of tenacity to find it (Odds are you'll have to google the phrase afterwards anyway because that show hasn't been on the air for YEARS, my scriptwriting teacher's just a huge fan and he kind of passed it down to me) and even then I was going to cut it short at around the 3000 word point.

Then I found myself on the Fire Emblem Recommended Fics for TVTropes and kind of went over the moon and spent another few hours on it. If this is the kind of work I can crank out over the course of one Sunday, though, I'll have to do this more often when I get off of school.

Anyway, thanks for reading, you guys are awesome.

PS: ...if anyone knows how to put together a tactician cloak like the MU's, could you tell me? I've gotta get a costume together for Otakuthon this August.


	16. Chapter Fifteen (Cam XV)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Fifteen – Assassins and More Questions**

* * *

I finally got a good night's sleep, for once. Wait, nevermind, I must have gotten up early again. Son of a bitch, is my stupid wake up at 5:30 college schedule still messing with my biological clock? I was really hoping I'd outgrown it.

Either way, let's just go and get some training done I guess. I suppose the owner of this inn wouldn't appreciate me wrecking a room like Chrom probably will at some point, so I'll head outside. Dumdedumdedum, walking down a hall with my sword and shield, entering lobby – Well HEL_LO_.

Heh.

Hehaha.

BWAHAHAHA.

Okay, no, don't laugh, you'll wake them up. Laugh in your head, and just...sit here and smirk at them. Or him. Oh, hey, he's awake already.

"Good Morning, Lon'qu!" I grin at the uncomfortable swordsman. "You sleep well?"  
He gestured at the small bundle of yellow asleep on his lap, her legs thrown over the side of the couch, and frowned.

"Please get her off." He whispered as quietly as possible.

"Yeah, I'm thinking no. Have fun explaining that to Chrom, I'mma go train now."

"Cameron, _please help me -_" Too late, Lon'qu, I'm already out the door. Ahh, I'm a bit of a dick sometimes. Good, there's no-one out here yet, I guess I can start getting these drills down then. Step back, raise shield. Position sword at 45 degree angle, tip only slightly protruding in front of the shield, and keep the hilt at waist level for now. Turn body to present side to opponent, but keep feet in same position.

Move forwards, shield rush, smash away their weapon and/or incapacitate them. Use momentum to spin and disembowel. Next one, thurst to throat. Assume no block and contact, fall back into original position but present about half of the blade out in front of the shield. Take the next few hits on it, take a few steps back, then lash out as they recoil from a push forward.

Hit Chrom in the face.

Wait.

"JESUS CHRIST!" I spat, pulling the blow just in time. "WHAT THE HELL, CAPTAIN?!"

Chrom looked at the sword about to cut into his throat, somehow managing not to blink. "...I was coming to try and find Lissa."

"She's in the common room, sleeping on top of Lon'qu." I mutter, carefully putting the sword back into its sheath on my back. Brief consideration led to a sigh and putting the shield back as well. "Damn, Captain, I could have killed you."

Chrom looked me dead in the eye and Falchion's pressing against my leg and that's why it's feeling really cold, isn't it?

Yeah, that's what's happening. Wonderful.  
"I'm afraid not." Chrom smirked, putting holy blade back into its position on his waist. "You are getting faster, though."  
"What can I say?" Shrug, roll shoulders. Wow, my muscles hurt. How long was I even out here for? "I've been practicing a lot recently."

"I can tell." Chrom smiled, walking back towards the inn. "Having something to fight for tends to make people better. As long as you don't do something stupid for her."

Really, Chrom? Really?

"Can I have one conversation with somebody other than Lon'qu that _doesn't _bring up Anna at some point?" Throw hands up into the air, irritated. Seriously, it went _well_, can we just stop bringing it up? "There's got to be something _else_ we can talk about, we're in a damn war for crying out loud!"

Chrom just waved as he walked into the inn. Well, I can't let that go unwatched, can I?

Attempts to see his reaction failed, as before I had even reached the door Chrom must have found them.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH MY SISTER?!"

Well, I'm losing all control. I'll just go stand over there and laugh my guts out.

I stumble into the lobby just as everyone staggered out of their rooms, some of them even holding weapons. This is the best way to wake people up, I swear.

* * *

Breakfast was an...eventful affair after that. Lon'qu had managed to calm Chrom down after explaining that Lissa had gotten them lost and decided she was too tired to go to bed that night, and just collapsed on him, at which point he was too petrified to actually do anything.

The fact that Lissa had probably done this on purpose for one reason or another never crossed anyone else's mind, but either way the escort duty person has been changed.

Now I'm walking through an empty street with an overexcited princess desperately interrogating me about last night. Wonderful.

"Lissa." I groan. "For the last time, we talked, met her sisters in the market, ate, talked some more and walked back. Nothing else happened."

Lissa sighed. "That's _boring_"

I'm never going to hear the end of it if I tell her about the kiss. I'll let someone else bring that up. Although, it does kind of suck that she's not quite as energetic as normal.

"Alright, what's got you down?" The awkward silence had been going on for a few minutes, someone had to say something.

"I miss Lon'qu." Lissa moaned. "Chrom overreacted."

I have a sneaking suspicion that he's the one following us, Lissa, and the fact that s/he just froze overhearing that is probably proof of that assumption. "Lissa, the guy couldn't even talk to you. He's nice enough, but..." Lon'qu, I am not piss talking you, I am trying to help here. Lissa scowled and kicked a pebble.

"He was getting better." She sighed. "And he's not _nice enough_, he's gentle and caring and-"

She kicked a second rock, and that one bounced off of something that sure as hell wasn't a wall. Crap.

"MOVE!"

Arrows arrows arrows I'm not fast enough – THANK YOU!

Lon'qu had gotten here and pulled Lissa out of the way, who shrieked. "I think we found her assassins." He grumbled conversationally.

"Yeah, no kidding."  
About ten of them come out of cover, pulling out more arrows. Their leader – the one with the fancy looking bow that's all gold and silver inlay, I'm bloody taking that – frowned.

"Lord Baelish said there were only meant to be two of you, but nothing changes." He drew one extremely large arrow back. "It's nothing personal, extra, it just pays well."

If I can get out of this alive, this should – _**should **_- be enough to bring the heirarch down off his high horse too. Awesome.

Naturally, the _if _is rather important too, but OH GOD.

Thankfully that shot went wide. This guy's a really bad shot, isn't he? Whatever, get shield and draw sword, because here comes the other nine. In a circle. I can block two.

...pray to the gods _oh CRAP-_

_Thank you whatever gods exist_

Their volley went wild, except for the few that hit the shield. "Come on, can't Baelish afford decent archers?"

Bad idea bad idea _bad idea-_

Dive down, arrows go over you, roll forwards and _hello boss man, can you deal with __**this?**_

Swing up, and he's got a sword in the way. Wonderful, guess he's just a dismounted Bow Knigth then. He's certainly better with the sword than a bow, that's for sure.

Alright, from the screams it sounds like Lon'qu is dealing with the regular archers pretty well. Okay, slash slash parry block with shield push forwards and try to unbalance him.

My left leg isn't responding. Well that can't be good.

...you have got to be fucking kidding me.

Buckle over, fall to the floor. Really? Really. Out of all the ways for me to die, it has to be a fucking _arrow to the knee joke_? Screw you universe, screw you.

This actually really hurts. The commander laughs, raises sword – well, that's the end of that. Sorry, Anna, guess I won't get to talk to your family after all-

Sword in commander's throat. What. Did Lon'qu just...?

Yeah, he threw the killing edge into a man's throat from across the street. _What the hell?_

The commander stared at it, almost like he's puzzled. Wow, my pain tolerance must have really gotten better if I'm not screaming about this.

OW. Christ, Lon'qu, that was my _hand_, why would you run on my _hand?_

Did he just – okay, what the hell?

Lon'qu pulled his killing edge from the guy's throat, keeping it in his left hand. The commander's fancy thing is in his right.

Lon'qu looks _pissed_.

Let's see, can I have a look at the rest of the battlefield? Holy crap, it's only been a few seconds, how did he get eight out of the nine?

The last one, gibbering, tried to get a shot off. Lon'qu just – _what the hell_? How overpowered _are _you, Lon'qu?

He just freaking knocked an arrow out of the air. Well, he's stalking towards the last guy.

"You. Drop your weapons and come with us."

The archer obliged his request. You don't mess with the Lon'qu.

"Hey, not to bother anyone, but if I could get a _little help_-" This does actually hurt now the adrenaline's worn off.

Lissa ran over, snapped the arrowhead off and - and - oh wait don't do that **OH GOD.**

Pulling those things out _sucks. _My knee is a bloody mess, let's just hope that – _aieeeeeeeeeee_. Well, that's the far-too-familiar-for-my-personal-preference feeling of bones reknitting, so it's not a mess anymore, just covered in blood. I've lost more. Can I stand on it? Yes. Awesome.

"You've gotten better." Grunt, gasp. Can stand, just hurts. Fricking hurts.

"Thank you." Lissa gasped, pale. Yeah, I guess that this would've been a trying experience for anyone.

I'll just hobble down this street on my own while you two stand next to each other in awkward silence, then.

"Why did you follow me?" Lissa asked after a few minutes. Hoo boy.

"I was worried." Lon'qu said simply. This is better than freaking romance anime. Not that I watch that.

...who the hell am I trying to kid? I'm a sad, sad man.

"Right, and that meant you'd be willing to follow around a woman." Lissa snorted. That wasn't very princess-like, Lissa. "Besides, the assassins are gone now, nothing for you to worry about."  
What the hell, woman? That was freaking _cold_. Like, _Severa _cold.

"I don't feel that way around you." Lon'qu admitted. Okay, don't frigging squee. "And...I would miss talking to you."

"Really?" Wow, your attitude just does complete one-eighties doesn't it Lissa? "So...no more distance?"

"...no more distance." Lon'qu agreed with a smile. D'awww. Support rose to A.

"You two are going to have one hell of a time explaining that to Chrom." Seriously, woman? Why would you shriek? "Did you _seriously _forget I was here? What the hell am I, _Kellam_?"

I meant that in the nicest way possible.

"They forgot about me, too." The archer complained. "Seriously, you'd think they'd at least remember the guy they had at swordpoint-"  
"You're not allowed to talk yet." I mutter, tapping his shoulder. "Now be silent before mister Sword-Demon over there flips out."  
"Yes, sir."

I enjoy being called 'sir'. Note to self: If asked for anything I want in return for an action at some point in the future, ask for a knighthood.

* * *

They're all packed up in the lobby ready to go when we get there. Well, I get there, Lon'qu took Lissa to her room so she could pack up. "Good afternoon to you, ladies and gentlemen!" Cheerful, slam door open. They all jump in surprise. Well, I'm covered in blood, so's this guy, and this guy _exists_ in the first place. "I believe we need to have a conversation!"  
Baelish is at the end of the room, and he must have recognized the uniform because he just got the 'oh crap' face. Checkmate, asshole. You really should have been more subtle.

"Cameron, what is this?" Chrom asked, angry.  
"Well, captain, I'm glad you asked! Archer what'syourname, why don't you describe the events of the last hour while I just go and stand next to Lord Baelish over there."  
Don't give them a chance to respond, just stroll across the room with a grin. Baelish froze in horror, and the archer started talking.

"Before leaving Ylisstol, we were hired to assassinate Princess Lissa." The archer said quietly. "We attempted to complete this mission an hour ago, it was foiled by your Feroxi swordsman and the shieldbearer."  
_That _is a title I could get behind. Baelish glanced towards the door, but I'm in your way now old man.

And grinning like a lunatic. Oh you fool, you should've gotten better men, _heirarch_.

Something just slammed into a cupboard, probably Chrom hitting the man or grabbing his throat or something. "Why should I let you live?"  
"Because...I can tell you...who hired us." The archer choke. "He leaked your position to the Plegian military during your travel to the eastern palace too."

Chrom lessened the pressure on his throat. "_Who?_"  
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Robin glance from me, to Baelish, to the archer, and his eyes widened.

Yeah, he's got it.

"The heirarch did, didn't he?" Robin said quietly. "He sold us all out."

The archer nodded weakly.

Robin cursed under his breath. "Sorry, Cameron. We honestly thought it was you for a while."  
"Don't worry about it." Shrug. "It would've been my call from that position too."

Baelish attempted a mad dash towards a window, but the blunt end of Cordelia's lance whipped up into his face and floored him. Well, I honestly think a little old-fashioned gloating is in order here.

Kneel down next to his stunned face, and smile. "Well, that's that then. Should've been more subtle."

That's an impressive glare, Baelish, but – "Shut up, Outsider." He whispered. "I know your little secret. Lucien's pretty angry with you."

What. How on – what did he -

"How do you-?"

Something slammed into my stomach, and yep that's a dagger. Pull it out. Crap, what's that green stuff dripping off of it?

Does he _seriously _carry around poisoned daggers up his sleeves? What the hell kind of planning is that?

Crap, it must be a fast-acting paralytic, I can't move. Ugh, this whole blood-in-my-throat thing is way too damn familiar now. Also, still uncomfortably warm. I should be fine, the room's full of healers.

Baelish scrambled to his feet – why is he so much faster? - and tried to make a break past me, when a dagger flashed and embedded itself in the bastard's head.

Who threw that? What did you do that for? We're going to have blood all over the nice innkeeper's floor now...

* * *

Finally coming too in a room that I don't own, but at least it's not the medical tent this time. I've gotten really sick of that place. Really, is it that hard to avoid getting your ass kicked Cameron? Either way, I'd probably end up here anyway. What's the worst that could happen to me - oh. Anna. Lovely, now I'm going to get guilt-tripped as soon as I leave this room in all likelihood. Killing's a rough enough business without having to worry about what'll happen to you, never mind anyone you care about. Whatever, I'm sure it'll all work out. I'm not foolish enough to think I'm invincible, but if I spend all my time brooding about it I'll probably end up doing something stupid and telling everyone to stay away from me so they don't get hurt when I die. That's actually on the road to being a likely scenario, but let's be honest here I haven't read a single story where that works out. Hell, you're much more likely to cause pain through the separation than any protection it would offer would give them. Much obliged, nature. Everyone's got something to lose, and they've all got to fight for it sometimes.

Wait, stop going on a tangent for a few seconds and notice something.

This isn't a room.

This is a cart.

"About time." Anna grumbled. "You almost gave me a heart attack."

"Sorry." I hissed in pain, pulling myself up. "How bad is it?"

"Still not the worst you've ever had." Anna sighed, her shoulder's slumping. "I'm serious, you know. I was terrified."

Well that tangent actually became immediately relevant. "I didn't know you cared that much."  
"Well, I do. So never say something like that again." Anna snapped, turning away from me. Ah, crap, I made her angry didn't I?

"Sorry, Anna, I just...respond to things with sarcasm." I really need to kick that habit, it's rapidly become a bad thing. "What happened to Baelish?"

She still wasn't looking at me, crap. I'm going to have to make up for this. "That assassin you brought back hit him in the head with a dagger and ran for his life. Gaius and Lon'qu tried to catch him, but he's good. Lon'qu thinks he was probably the leader, now, and from what he told me of the idiot with the fancy bow he's probably right."

If he was that good, he should've been able to beat up Lon'qu and kill all three of us. Why wouldn't he? What's _his_ angle? How did Baelish know about Lucien? Is that why the hierarch kept himself with the column instead of getting killed by the Plegian military after leading us into the ambush? Did Lucien forewarn him or something? Crap, if that's something he can do I'm going to have to take care not to rely too much on what I remember of the game. Wait, if I was unconscious from battle than why didn't I end up in the blue room? That's what happened almost every other time I've fallen asleep from stress. Actually, how come he hasn't shown up in the real world like he did when he passed my shield over?

Flow of thought disrupted when Panne sticks her head in. Wow, I've not actually had a conversation with her yet, have I? I should probably get on that.

Those lines on her face are really weird to look at, actually. So are the ears.

"The Captain wishes to know how you are doing." She said stiffly. Right, doesn't trust me yet.

"I'm fine, thanks, miss...er...?" Be polite. Be polite.

"Panne." Panne replied, still cautious. "Last of the Taguel."

How to approach this?

I forgot I'm an idiot.

"Right, that. Horrible buisness, that, absolutely disgusting." I'm really not approaching this correctly. Ah, well, no going back now. "Honestly, I apologize for the behavior of my species. We can be real bastards sometimes."

Panne looks surprised, but not really angry. I guess that didn't come out as flippant as it sounded to me, then. "Very well. I shall inform the Captain that you are awake."

Wonderful. Panne lingered for a few more seconds, glancing at Anna.  
"You take good care of your mate, human. That is commendable."

What.

Anna dropped the coin she was polishing – that's a really weird nervous habit, but it sure does suit her – and flushed red, starting to stammer. What are you, Olivia? Either way, Panne's gone now, and I'm 60% sure she was smirking. Okay, so the proud rabbit does have a sense of humor.

Fascinating.

Well, Anna's now stubbornly _not _looking at me, so that's...probably not a good sign. "Are you still angry at me?"

Anna sighed and slumped her shoulders. "No."

Excellent. "Good. How were your sisters?"

She shrugged. "I got the family discount for some Steel weapons, so that was good. They were heading towards Ylisstol, but they're heading for home now to check on our parents."

"That's good." I sigh, pulling myself up."And how much money did you _make _in the market this morning?"

She turned to me, grinning with a familiar grin in her eye. "Oh, I sold a bunch of old iron weapons – we got enough steel from my sisters to arm the whole company – for about one and a half their original value."  
"The damaged ones?" That's surprising. Anna grinned.

"Yep. I'm a genius, aren't I?"

"You're good with the market, I'll give you that." I sigh. "Anything else?"  
She glanced around the stocked cart and smirked at me. "I managed to get the Captain to let you ride in the cart for the rest of the march to Ferox."  
"You're a goddess."

**  
A/N: I'm a bit worried that I'm moving too fast with the subplots and their resolutions, but since all of them kind of tie together I'm not really going to stop. There's always going to be someone or some_thing _behind every other person or thing in this story, and nobody – I mean nobody – is completely what they seem.

Except Vaike, he's still an idiot.

Anyway, for those of you who follow Time Matters Not as well, the wedding chapter's at 3000 words out of 10,000 planned. For those of you who don't, for whatever reason, ignore that message.

Finally, let's start a little game. If someone can find the hidden repeating phrase (And it's hidden really well, as in split up over the course of one section, but they are all together) that foreshadow something, and tell me where it's from, I'll write a one-shot of anything FE related you want (No sex scenes, please). So far, it's in this chapter and the last one. Enjoy. Feel free to say I have weird tastes if you want.

See you next time...


	17. Chapter Sixteen (Cam XVI)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Sixteen – It's Really Cold Guys**

"Cameron, you're a jerk." Gaius said for the tenth time this week. We'd started to reach Regna Ferox, and I'd done messed up. It's not African, it's Russian.

Suck on that great big popsicle of awful. I don't know how Lon'qu stands it, never mind how Basilio wanders around without a shirt.

"Gaius, consider this three weeks of _glorious _payback." I said cheerfully from my spot inside the Quatermaster's wagon. The thief grumbled to himself and walked away, shaking the snow out of his coat. Vaike wandered up, shivering.  
"...I give up."  
"You want a cloak?" I asked with a grin. Vaike had insisted that he could make it through Ferox without having to put any more clothes on, despite having seen Chrom and the rest of the original Ferox team requesting winter cloaks.

"Yeah, yeah, shut up." Vaike grumbled. "How'm I supposed to be awesome with my muscles frozen?"

He'd lasted half an hour today. Getting longer. "I'll go grab you one."

I turned inside and shuffled through the box from before, eventually finding something of suitable size. "Catch."  
Vaike quickly wrapped himself up in the cloak, groaning in relief. "Thanks."  
"You're welcome, now get a move on."

The fighter wandered off, and a sigh came from above me.

"You alright up there, Virion?"

Ever since the attack on the column, Virion had been required to sit on top of the cart with a bow prepped. I don't think any wyvern riders would be willing to fly into Regna Ferox, seeing as it's a country that actually has a military still intact – I'm pretty sure that Ylisse's is screwed by this point – but the snow probably isn't good for the giant reptiles. The archer glared down at me, snow matting his hair and fur cloak. "It's getting a bit nippy, I'll admit."

"Good to hear!" I'm enjoying this way too much. "Do you want anything, mate?"

The response was a few seconds of awkward eye contact. "I'll take that as a no."

Duck back inside. Geez, even in here it's freezing cold. The cart's actually rather big, which makes sense considering that until we seperated it was carrying the Pegasus Knight's gear too. Since they left, it freed up a lot of space for Anna to, you know, sleep. I guess I sleep here too, but to be perfectly honest my dreams have been getting really weird recently, to the point where I more just sort of lay there thinking.

They're not nightmares, per say, they're just in the blue room with no Old Man in sight. That would just be creepy, if it wasn't for the confusing stuff that keeps happening in the corner of my eye. It keeps changing, too, from blood to fire to someone walking to water to a _car_...

Currently, my working theory is that it's related to how I ended up signing that contract and ending up here. So, I _think_ I got hit by a car while walking, and there was fire involved, and I woke up in water so that part makes perfect sense...then again, seeing as reality seems to completely hate me, it'll probably pull a one-eighty on this explanation and it'll turn out that my universe collapsed in on itself or something.

I really hope that's not what happened. Oh, hey Chrom.

"Hey, Captain." Nod. Wonder what he wants.

"We're going to be reaching the Royal Arena in an hour or two." Well, I think that's what he said because his teeth keep chattering together. "Could you and Anna start getting things ready for when we meet up with Flavia and Basilio's men?"  
"I'll see what we can do." Chrom nods and wanders off. It turns out, I only got to ride in the cart because I got turned into Anna's assistant for this whole schtick. She left out the little detail of me being turned into what basically amounted as her slave, but to be perfectly honest I don't mind.

Wait.

I don't mind because _I get to ride in the nice and warm cart _not I don't mind because – uh – what am I trying to convince myself of here? Never mind. Let's just see if we've got any form of hot drink or soup things to give out once we reach the arena, they could probably do with getting warmed up.

Let's try not to step on the sleeping lady. She had to deal with giving Vaike a new tent last night, seeing as the last one got blown away by wind and we couldn't find it. She must have been up until two in the morning or something like that, poor woman.

...woman let go of my leg. MY FOOT IS NOT A SNUGGLY TOY.

Thank you.

Alright, let's just have a rustle through this box here...pots, pans...tea leaves. Well, I've never made the stuff outside of bags before. I guess I could ask Mariabelle for help – oh, crap, I've not talked to her in weeks. This isn't going to go well.

* * *

The arena, thankfully, was close-roofed, so even as we all milled around in the center waiting for something important to happen at least we weren't getting covered in snow while being bored. Well, they were bored. I really wish I was.

"You're stirring too hard!"

I really, _really _wish I was bored.

"Mari, you told me to stir, therefor, I am _stirring_"

"Do _not _call me MARI!"

Her parasol slapped into the back of my head. Woman, that doesn't even hurt. Seriously, I've been thrown off of cliffs, stabbed multiple times, almost cut in half, broken multiple bones and blacked out after 90% of our battles, do you really think that's going to do anything against the ungodly pain tolerance I've built up?

"If you stir so hard, the leaves will break up and the flavor will become too strong."

I'm 95% sure she's doing this to mess with me. Fine, I'll stir slower.

"Don't let it settle!"  
"Why don't you bloody well do it then?" I snap. I've been standing over a pot of boiling water for the last ten minutes, getting what I'm pretty sure are false instructions on how to _stir tea leaves _from a spoilt noblewoman who I really should have let die. Why didn't I, again? Other than continuity reasons?

Oh, right, Mariabelle/Gaius shipping. I thought I promised I wasn't going to do that?

"It is beneath my station to perform such a simple task." She sniffed from her chair. I hate you so much. "I would only prepare tea for close friends or those it would be my duty to serve."

"I don't qualify as a close friend? Woman, I got thrown off a cliff for you!"

No! I'm never letting the cliff thing go!

"Being grateful for a rescue does not equate to friendship." She scowled. "Now, kindly remove the leaves. It's finished."

"Thank the gods." I moan. Yeah, make sure to refer to their religion most of the time, I already had to tell Gaius that Jesus Christ is an ancestral curseword passed down my family. My exceedingly Spanish grandmother would probably slap me twice for that, once for taking the lord's name in vain and another for spreading lies about the faith.

STOP THINKING ABOUT YOUR FAMILY

Okay, good, that pitfall has been avoided. I don't need to break down. "Fine, the leaves are out. Any final instructions you wish to share with me?"  
Mariabelle grinned. Oh, don't you say it. Please. I cannot be held accountable. "You never had to stir."

...I hate you so much.

"I hate you. A lot." I pick up the pot with a grunt and carry it over to where a rough line was waiting for something warm. To be honest, they probably won't even care about the flavor. Drop it down, grab a ladle, and start filling tin mugs for them.

"Captain." I hand a shivering Chrom his first. He downs it in one gulp, sighing.

"That's better. Thank you."

"You're welcome." I grumble. Wait, there's someone by the entrance to the arena. Oh, crap. "Yo, Captain, isn't that one of Phila's knights?"

Chrom turned, his eyes widening in shock and surprise. "What's she doing here? Excuse me."

Well, it's that scene. Wonderful. Which means that...oh, come on, we only just got here, now we're going to have to leave soon.

"How hard was she to deal with?" Anna asked, wandering over from where she'd been talking with the Feroxi quatermasters.

"Hell." I grumbled, pouring another mug. Most of them should have had theirs by now, so I'll just hold it out in front of me and...there, it's gone. "Hey, Kellam."

"Hello." Kellam yawned. "Long march, wasn't it?"  
"For you, maybe." I grin. Kellam frowned, sighing.  
"Right, you got to ride in the cart. Lucky." He muttered.  
"If it makes you feel better, I've got to do everything she says now." I jerk a thumb in Anna's general direction, where she playfully punches my shoulder.

"You're in a relationship, you had to do that anyway." Kellam said with a grin. Well, then.  
"I concede the point." I sigh. Anna shook her head in what I really hope was mock despair and not actual despair before wandering off. The melodramatic sigh points towards it being mock despair, so that's good. I don't want to actually piss her off again.

"So, what did Baelish say to you to get you so surprised?" Kellam asked curiously. Well, then.  
"He said Lucien knew where I was." I sighed. No point giving him the whole truth. "Which means he's probably going to come hunting after me again."

"I've got your back if he does." Kellam said seriously. "An invisible wall should come in handy, right?"

I stare at him for a few seconds, wondering if he's being serious. "I really don't think it works that way, but thanks?"

Then he started to chuckle. Oh, damnit, he wasn't.

"Got you."

"Yeah, you did." I sigh. Oh, wow, Chrom just kicked something to the floor after reading the message that the Pegasus Knight gave him. "...that can't be good news."

* * *

As it turns out, it's official report time. For some reason, I'm not sure what, I got called into the meeting before the mass announcements. Chrom's standing in front of a large table, looking a combination of pissed off and terrified. I'll be honest, he's got a much larger temper than he seemed to in the game, but then again it's not like I've talked to him outside of negative events so far. He's probably still pissed off by Baelish's betrayal without Emmeryn there to talk him down, not to mention the fact that he was involved in multiple other attacks on his family – and probably this one, too, now that I think about it. I _did _see a pidgeon one morning after we'd split, but I thought it was Virion's letter to his parents. That was colossaly stupid, wasn't it?

Wait, stop thinking, he's doing stuff.

"It would appear that the Exalt has been captured." Chrom said, appearing calm. I guess I'm better at reading people than I thought I was, then. "She was intercepted before reaching Ylisstol, where Phila's knights were overwhelmed and the survivors captured. The one who escaped arrived this morning to inform me of these events."

Basilio grumbled from where he was standing next to Chrom. "It gets worse. Ylisstol fell a day later. One of the nobles opened the gates after learning of the Exalt's capture."

"King Gangrel demands that we hand over the Fire Emblem before the end of next month, or the Exalt shall be executed." Chrom continued, this time as his hand curled into a fist. "We cannot allow that monster to wield the artifact."

Well _that _didn't happen in the game. Damn it, the universe is leaning towards screwing me over instead of conforming to history again isn't it?

Robin looked up from the map spread across the table. "It would appear our best option would be to mobilise immediately and attack the Plegian capital, reclaiming the Exalt." He tapped the map. "We don't have much time to act before they learn of our intentions, so we must get as close as possible before it becomes common knowledge. I believe the best course of action would be to move through the desert, but we must have sufficient supplies to do so. Cameron?"

Oh, _that's _what I'm here for! Thank god I went over this hypothetically with Anna earlier in the week to kill time.

"Currently, we've got water to last us a month of marching in normal conditions. In the desert, though, I'd feel a lot more comfortable if we gave double rations of water to make sure no-one gets heatstroke or – gods forbid – ends up suffering permanent damage from dehydration. So, two weeks of water and a month's worth of food if we ration properly." Yeah, okay, so it was hypothetically for her, this stuff's important for me to know.

Robin frowned. "It'd take at least three weeks to march through the desert, and that's not counting any skirmishes with the Risen or Plegian patrols that might occur. I'd like to believe we could restock at the villages, but we can't risk them being loyal to Plegia."

He sighed, and drummed his fingers on the table. "...I think I have a plan. Khan Flavia, could you take your men the long way around?"

This is surprising. Flavia evidently thinks so too.  
"Well, yes, but I don't see how - "

Robin pulled out a few chess pieces, placing a Knight and a Castle at the arena's location on the map. "The main force, compromised of the Feroxi soldiers and whatever elements of the Ylissean army they pick up on the way, will go the long way around, through Ylisse and then down the main road. It'll be hard, but it will give us two advantages. One: We can afford to carry more water for more people, guaranteeing our travel through the desert. Two: The Plegian forces will be preoccupied with this attack, and will attempt to respond to it. We may be able to surprise them."

Basilio scowled. "It works, but there's no way you'll make it out without the force behind you."

Robin nodded. "Point conceded. Evolved point: We allow the main force to leave a week ahead of us, gaining momentum, distance and attracting attention. With that week gained, we should arrive at the capital at roughly the same time, where the two armies shall have their battle as the Shepherds either take the city or free Emmeryn."

You know, you never see Robin planning in the game. He's always either presenting the final plan, or revealing it as it happens. It's quite fascinating, he's actually blotted out everything else in existance that isn't relevant to his plan. A few quick clacks, and more chess pieces are on the map.

"That," He pointed towards a black rook. "is the most likely location of Phila and her pegasus knights, a large prison outside of the capital. A splinter force should be sent to release them, in preperation to join the final battle. In the case of the situation evolving, changes will be made. In any case, Phila's troops should only be allowed to engage upon my signal. Make sure that is absolutely clear."

Chrom stared at the tactician for a while. "You want me to stand around and do nothing while Gangrel prepares to execute my sister? He's a madman!" He said angrily. "He could change his mind at any moment and kill her anyway!"

"Chrom." Grab his shoulder. "He wouldn't risk losing his only chance at getting the Fire Emblem. He's mad, not stupid. We've got time."

"I know that." Chrom snapped. "It's...she's my _sister_, Cameron."

"I get that." Yeah, I kinda do. Although Fiona would punch me if she ever found out I was worried about her. Stupid woman. Oh, god, Chrom's gonna frigging die once Emmeryn gets killed off. You can't save her. Saving her leads to the possible end of the world. This is the best overall combination of events. Besides, doesn't she show up in one of the spotpasses or something? I hadn't downloaded them before I came here, but I know that the Ike/Soren shippers exploded over some new character and people survived instead of dying. We wandered over to the main group, where Frederick was explaining the situation, and Liz ran up to us. Yeah, that's gonna be weird. Oh, hey Sumia – oh, god, I remember this now. He. Hehaha.

"Chrom!" Liz pouted. "CHROM!"

"Hm?" Chrom snapped out of his funk, blinking. "I'm sorry, what?"

Liz sighed. "Jeez, get a hold of yourself..." She muttered angrily, before sighing. "Don't you regret letting Emm go?"

Chrom hesitated, wincing. "I..."

Here it comes this is glorious this is glorious this is glorious...

"Captain!"

Chrom turns to face Sumia, massive hilarity in three...two...one...

SUMIA PUNCH, Chrom on the ground. He. Hehaha. Hahaha.

"OW! What was that for, Sumia?"

Sod it, I can't hold this in.

"HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HA HAHAHAHA HA HAHAHA HAA..."

Oh, god, I'm missing the rest of the conversation from rolling on the floor laughing. Okay, stand back up now.

"Sumia, when you slap someone you're meant to use an open palm..." Lissa sighed. This just made me laugh more.

"...are you done?" Chrom asked after he finished his conversation. I pause, wiping a tear from my eye.

"...yes."

* * *

A/N: Two weeks of college left before I can go back to updating something every three days instead of every week. I'm going to be taking a week off to get all my assorted projects done, so...this and Time Matters Not are on hiatus until then. If you see random Lord of the Rings stuff popping up on my account, that's actually homework that I decided to post anyway.

I love my english class SO much.

Anyway, good luck to you, and I'll see you on May 11th with new stuff (Hopefully).


	18. Chapter Seventeen (Cam XVII)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Seventeen – Weather Issues**

You know what? I might have only lived in Canada for four years before coming here, but even then that was enough snow for a lifetime.

This is just taking the mick. Since we marched out about a week after Basilio's army left – which I'm fairly sure is NOT what is supposed to happen, but it makes sense so let's just roll with it – and now we're trudging through the snow. Also, it turns out my whole cart ride thing doesn't apply for when we needed scouts, and as soon as I mentioned having dealt with deep snow before Robin decided to send me out to do the scouting with Lon'qu.

Whoop de doo.

So, what do I see? White. Just...white for miles and miles. Honestly, why couldn't we send the fliers to do this?

Oh, right. The blizzard.

Frigging blizzard.

"I hate this."

Not that there was anyone here to hear me complain. Whatever. Let's go back down this hill and pack up, a three-day scouting mission left me freezing cold and with no other information to report other than 'it's all perfectly clear'. Seriously, one day in between scouting exits is not long enough. I wonder if Lon'qu's going to be heading back today, he'd gone the other way last night after we found that split in the road.

"It's ruined."

GAAAAAAAH!

"Damn, Lon'qu, don't sneak up on me like that." I sighed. Lon'qu stood there impassively, with what may have been a smirk on his lips. "What d'you mean, it's ruined?"  
"My path, we'd never get the whole army down it. It goes through a forest and most of the trees have fallen over. Yours?"

"Up a hill." I sighed. "It's a pretty tall hill, but we'll manage."

Lon'qu nodded. "I see. We must be near Caldren River, then."

I really wish they'd had the decency to name more places in Awakening, because I'm learning all this as I go. Thankfully I stole a peek at a map before heading out on my first one, and that sounds familiar.

"That's the one of the branches that heads into the big inlet, right?"  
Lon'qu nodded. "Yes. We can run next to it and cross over the Calrek once we cross the border."  
"And this snow is more than likely finally gone." I sigh. "I'm sick of this stuff."

Lon'qu said nothing, and we headed back. I guess we'll be walking for a few hours.

"So, are you and the princess-"  
"We are not having this conversation." Lon'qu said quickly. Well, screw you too.

"Oh come on, there's nothing else to-"  
"It's freezing cold, I'm tired, I'm angry, I'm hungry, we are NOT talking about this right now." Lon'qu grumbled.  
"Fine, fine. So...what do you want to talk about?"

Twenty seconds. One minute. Five minutes.

I guess we're walking in silence, then.

"So...we're friends right?"  
"We are NOT having a MOMENT." Lon'qu snapped. Wow, he really is cranky.

"Right, sorry, sorry..." I muttered. About one hour later I'm getting really fed up with the silence until we saw the convoy again. To be more specific, Stahl and Sully acting as the vanguard, so there's probably about ten more minutes of walking left.  
"Hey." Stahl said with a grin. "What did you see?"  
"White. Lots of white." Deadpan it Cameron. "Lots and lots of white. Then I climbed a really tall hill to see more white while Lon'qu went into a forest, so he got to see white and brown which mixed it up a little."

Stahl chuckled. "Well, those are the first landmarks we've seen in a while so we'll probably be able to just stay in a group for the rest, and if this blizzard goes down we can just send Sumia and Cordelia up!"  
I open my mouth to protest that the blizzard had lasted for almost three weeks and showed no sign of stopping, when it stopped.

What.

"Well. I guess we didn't need to send you guys out anyway." Sully chuckled. "How was your walk?"

"Piss off." I grumble, stomping in the general direction of the rest of the convoy that just became visible. Sully and Stahl's laughter kept on going for a few minutes at the very least.

* * *

"So?" Anna asked from outside the cart, probably smirking.  
"So, the powers-that-be still hate me." I muttered. "As soon as I get back, the blizzard dies down. Really? _Really_?"

I finally finished changing from that damn Ferox fur coat thing into something actually comfortable – not to mention gloriously dry – and stepped out, brushing myself down. I've given up on having the chainmail under the tunic, it takes forever to get it off or put it on. This way I can just throw it on whenever there's a random attack, and if I ever randomly wake up in an ocean again I can take it off in a few seconds so that I'll actually be able to swim. I'm a genius.

"We're all aware that someone clearly dislikes you." Anna chuckled. "You're lucky enough to get out of most of those fixes, though."  
"Yeah, that's the weird part." I sighed. "I take it I'll need to head over to the command wagon to talk to Chrom?"  
Anna gave a nod before pulling herself back into the cart. "Don't take too long, I'm going to need someone to hold things while I do inventory."  
"Is heavy lifting all I'm good for?" I grumbled half-heartedly as we went our seperate ways. It only took a couple of seconds to get to the largest of the new wagons we were assigned through Ferox, with the argument being that it would cut down on our travel time. Personally, I was going to be glad that I'd get to sleep in the same cart as the guys again.

Predictably, Robin decided that was too normal, and that I should continue suffering through having an attractive redhead that I'm nowhere near confident enough to touch sleeping on the other side of a thin barrier of pots and pans. I hate that guy.

"You were here?" Robin mused, tapping a map. I wandered over to where Lon'qu was and nodded.

"Yeah, on top of the hill. Big hill."

Robin sighed. "I'd hoped we could go through the forest, but apparently not. We'll have to deal with this."

"It's not so bad." I shrugged. "...not helping pushing the wagons up the hill onetwothreeNOT IT."

Lon'qu groaned. "Really?"  
"I'm pretty sure I can get you to do anything." Robin said with a grin, flicking a gold coin into the air before snatching it with his other hand. Oh, for the love of-

"I am not Anna, I'm not unhealthily obsessed with shiny metal disks."  
"Well, I _meant _that I'd pay her to tell you to do it, but..." Robin trailed off with a grin. Asshat.

"Shut up. I'll probably end up doing it anyway." I groaned. "What else?"

"Well, there's more bad news. The river is almost a hundred feet wide, so if the bridge is gone it'll take forever to get across it." Robin sighed. "Thankfully, it really should still be there unless reality itself hates us."

"Please tell me there's some good news." I sighed. This is getting ridiculous.  
"Yeah." Robin nodded. "There is, actually. We got a message back from Flavia and her troops, Plegia's convinced we're coming through that way. We shouldn't meet any resistance between now and getting there."  
"Any human resistance." Lon'qu said darkly. "I saw some Risen tracks in the forest."  
"And you didn't tell me?" What the hell, man? "We could have been attacked!"  
"They were a few days old." Lon'qu shrugged. "I could barely see them with the blizzard, and I figured that they'd have moved on already."  
Robin sighed. "Well, I'll make sure we have everyone on lookout for them anyway, the last thing we need is half of us injured due to being too relaxed. You can go get some rest now, Lon'qu, I want to speak to Cameron."

Lon'qu nodded and stepped outside. Well, what's this about?  
"Lon'qu saw the more interesting stuff, Robin. Surely you don't need me." I said. Wow, I'm really bored. That bedroll sounds really inviting. Robin grinned and pulled out a box full of something...familiar.

Oh hell no.

"Chess?"  
"No." I said flatly. "Never again."

Robin chuckled before setting it up anyway. "Consider it an order. I want to talk to you, and this is a good way to make sure you're aware. You're white."

Alright, sod it, let's just open with the normal move, freeing up the bishop and the queen.

"Fairly typical." Robin commented. "Not like you normally are."

_**CLAK**_

"What do you mean by that?"

_**CLAK**_

"Well, your fighting style isn't exactly something I've seen before. Really, a shield as an offensive weapon, who would have thought?"

_**CLAK**_

"It's a solid half-inch of steel." I deadpanned. "How is that NOT a good weapon?"

_**CLAK**_

Robin shrugged. "Oh, it certainly works. It's not something I'd train other people to do, but you manage it well enough."

_**CLAK**_

"It just came to me, I guess."

_**CLAK**_

"Hey, Cameron...we're friends, right?"

Buh?

My hand hovers over the piece I was about to move. "What kind of question is that? Of course we are!"

Robin sighed. "It's just...sometimes I don't feel like I belong here. Everyone else either knew each other, or did something eye-catching, or were given under orders – even you introduced yourself by throwing yourself in front of an axe meant for the princess."  
"Not my proudest moment." I grinned, getting a small laugh from the tactician.

"Yeah, it really wasn't. But still, look at me. They just found me. I just happened." Robin sighed. "It's like I'm not meant to be here."

Okay, no, Robin, that's my problem. I am _actually _not meant to be here, you are. "Hey, Robin? What's the first thing you remember?"

_**CLAK**_

I make my move. Robin blinks. "Chrom finding me in a field."  
"Right, and what happened after that?"  
"I helped save a village."  
"One of your earliest memories was to help save people's lives. You deserve to be here just as much as I do." I grinned. "What brought this on?"

Robin sighed. "I just...I don't know. Sometimes I just feel like I'm going to let everyone down."  
"That's called pressure. It comes with command, and you've got one hell of a command right now." I shrug. "You could probably do with letting off some steam."  
"Yeah, I could." Robin admitted, slumping back in his chair. "...oh, and Checkmate."

What?  
_**CLAK**_

"Oh you overconfident sleazy son of a-"

* * *

"Alright, one, two, three...PUSH!"  
With a groan, Kellam and I forced ourselves forwards and finally managed to push the supply cart up to the top of the hill, where Anna reconnected the horses and nodded ion satisfaction.

"Alright, that's the first one!"

Shut up, Robin.

"Just leave it to the Vaike!"

We slowly turned around to see Vaike _dragging_ the command cart up the hill, grinning as he did so. I guess that's the ludicrously high Strength score showing its worth, then.

"See? It's not that hard!" He panted as he finally reached the top of the hill. Anna reconnected the second set of horses to the command cart's harness, while Stahl and I grinned at each other. "...what are you two grinning about?"

As one, we both reached out and gave Vaike a light shove, making his exhausted and probably sore body tumble back down the hill...and the snow. He really should have kept that winter cloak.

"Go get the rest then, Vaike!" Stahl shouted down the hill. Vaike waved his fist at us from the snowbank he'd ended up in while Chrom and the others still at the bottom laughed at the guy's misfortune.

Well, not misfortune seeing as we did it on purpose, but still...onto the river!

* * *

Well now.

Well well well well NOW.

"Someone please just kill me already." I groaned. Somehow, between the space of time when we sent out the fliers and they came back, the bridge over the river had collapsed and we had to abandon the wagons...and the spare supplies. This wasn't a good thing, we need that water for the desert.

"I'm afraid you'll have to suffer the same as us, Lucky." Gaius said with a scowl. "Hopefully we can grab some more water later."

"Yeah." I sigh. "Hopefully Stahl and Sully will catch up, too."  
They'd volunteered to take the wagons back to the nearest village, before either joining up with Flavia's forces or ours, depending on who they caught first. I really hope they don't get ambushed by Risen or something crap like that.

Anyway, we'd made it across first, now it was the rest of the convoy's turn to walk across the ice. Now, I don't think any of us are going to fall through, considering that Kellam made it without anything going wrong. Wait, was that a crack and a scream?

"LISSA!"

Well fuck you too laws of reality.

"Dammit." Gaius muttered, dashing out back onto the ice with Chrom. Fortunately, Lon'qu had already dived in. A few rather tense seconds later, the swordsman rose back up spluttering with an unconcious and soaking wet princess in his arms. He thrust Lissa into Chrom's arms before gratefully allowing Gaius to pull him out with a brief statement that I couldn't quite make out from over here.

Mariabelle was imeddiately hovering over Lissa, babbling about how they'd need to get her out of that dress before she froze to death, while Lon'qu just wandered over to the tarp we'd had Cordelia and Sumia set up after flying over the stupidly wide river and threw on some fresh clothes. By the time they'd managed to carry the probably very heavy cleric to the same tarp, Lon'qu was already dry again.

"That." Anna said with a huff, sitting down next to us. "Is why you don't wear big poofy dresses."

The statement is so perfectly timed that Gaius and even Lon'qu couldn't help but start laughing. Personally, I'm just angry that everything that could have gone wrong with this sequence did.

"Remind me why we didn't just fly over again?" I groaned. "I mean, just have Cordelia and Sumia take us over one-by-one. Would that have been so hard?"

"Robin sent them out looking for the people that could have destroyed the bridge." Gaius shrugged "You'll just have to live with it."

"Lissa nearly didn't." Lon'qu said darkly. "We should have gone the long way."  
"And lost a week instead of a day?" Gaius shot back. "Heck, we could even have run into the Risen and lost someone. At least we're all alive."

Lon'qu shook his head and grunted. I guess that translates to 'I guess you're right but I don't want to say anything'.

* * *

Well, with all that stupid winter weather behind us now we can deal with good old regular climate...oh, no, wait, this is a desert. Wonderful.

"How's the water situation?" Chrom asked grimly. We'd found an oasis that we'd set up next to for the day, the first chance for shade and bathing the entire week. We've not exactly got much time to get further into Plegia.

"It's not looking good." Anna sighed. "This oasis let us refill a little, but unless we can find a village that would be willing to give us some barrels and a way to move them all we have are everyone's handful of canteens."  
"Water for a day..and we've got three days of marching left to do at least." Robin frowned. "I wish we had someone who knew the area, but we'll have to make do for now. Tell everyone to drink as much as they want now, then limit themselves to one canteen a day from here out."  
"We'll dehydrate if we try that, Robin." I warn. "It's just not enough water for this much heat."

The tactician glared at me, pointing at his haphazardly discarded cloak. "I can tell it's hot, but the fact of the matter is we need to find a village sooner rather than later and the Pegasi aren't up to flying right now!"  
Oh, right, the Pegasi. Yeah, they don't do well with heat, turns out they need even more water than regular horses. Cordelia almost had a fit when hers refused to fly yesterday, and I honestly don't think I've ever seen her and Sumia as relieved as they were when we found the oasis.

It's not like I can tell them, but we SHOULD be meeting Nowi and Gregor soon, along with three villages (And the damn Grimleal, but we should be able to deal with them). Unless the world's going to screw with me like it did with Donnel and relocated the villages for no reason other than to mess with me.

"WHAT IS THAT?!"

The shout drew all of us outside, and...that's a green dragon. Well, hey Nowi.

It's a green dragon with two men on it. Naturally, that's when we see the Flux orbs being hurled at her, one of which slams into her wing and sends her plummeting to the ground while screaming in pain. The men begin screaming as Nowi plummets towards the ground behind that huge boulder over there. Wait, two men? I know Gregor's probably one of them, who's the other?

Irrelevant. Chrom's giving orders for us to move out now.

"Chrom, what was that thing?" Robin asked, bewildered. Chrom scowled.

"It's a manakete. They're meant to be extinct."

Robin blinked, probably to ask what a manakete was, when the Grimleal decided to start throwing said Flux orbs at us. Well, to be perfectly honest, after a week of dealing with two separate extremes of weather I'm welcoming the fight.

If it wasn't for the damn heat.

Stupid weather.

* * *

A/N: Next chapter, first fight with the Grimleal, meeting Nowi, Gregor and the other guy who's kind of a secret. See you!

EDIT 01 12/05/2013 - Thanks to Aemzso for pointing out a mistake in Nowi's coloration, I don't use her anywhere near as much as I do Nah and they've kind of blurred together in my head. Fix'd.


	19. Chapter Eighteen (Cam XVIII)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Eighteen – The Old Man was talking in plural.**

* * *

"Hold the line!"

Well this isn't going well.

Virion's unconscious on the ground next to me, one of the Flux spells having reduced his arm to a shriveled black mess. Anna is kneeling over him, frantically healing – thankfully, it looks like it's working – and here I am trying to cover them. Thank the gods for this shield.

We're in a real mess. We've been caught unawares, tired and thirsty, and surrounded. The last thing I saw of Kellam was him going down underneath a crazed ax-man that Lon'qu managed to get, but I don't know if he got back up.

"Robin, we could really use one of your genius plans right now!" I yelled. The tactician hurls one last ball of thunder as his tome shredded itself apart from the inside, intercepting one of the Flux blasts as it flew towards Chrom, scowling.

"I'm working on it!"

"Who are these guys?" Ricken shouted, slumping to his knees with blood trickling from his nose as his wind barrier fell under attack from three or more shamans.

"I've got no idea." Gaius said with a light laugh, dodging the next one thrown at him. "But they're good, aren't they?"

Really not the time to be complimenting them, Gaius!

You know what? Sod it. "Hey, Robin, I count five mages on this side. You?"

"I do too. Wait. What are you doing?"

"Improvising."

It makes sense. I'm fast enough to block those orbs, and my shield appears to be the only thing other than a permanent magic barrier capable of taking a hit from them. If I can just scatter the shamans, then -

"THAT'S A STUPID IDEA!" Robin yelled, catching on to what I was thinking. Clever boy, that's a good point.

Doing it anyway.

Dashing forwards, it seems the five shamans were temporarily taken aback – probably by how stupid this plan was - as the shots paused for a second. Then, they resumed, all aimed at my chest. Let's hold up the shield, and – perfect!

"COME ON, THEN!"

Twenty paces. They've opted for saturation rather than power or accuracy, but thankfully most of them are going wide and I can block the rest.

Ten paces.

Five paces.

...and CONTACT. Damn, my sword's caught in his half-formed spell. Shield slam in face, problem solved. The other four are charging up, DODGE. Good. Heh, one of them hit the other. That's why you don't open fire in a circle, douchebags. Slash low, not at their hands, don't let them block.

Come on, then! Where's that Dark Mage defense that was so easy to exploit?

Apparently that represents them blocking shit not actually tanking hits. Well, you're all going down! Last two – okay, three, one of them's unconcious on the floor not _dead_. Still counts.

ORMAYBENOTMYLEG

fuck

okay

ow

well this is a new sensation.

Shitshitshitstandup they're going to kill you – oh thank god, they're dead. Handaxes, by the look of things. Hello man number two.

"Thanks for the save." I mutter, wincing.

The man blinks at me, looking as surprised as I am hurt. "...you've gotta be kidding me."

Oh, there's no way. There's no way in fucking hell.

"_Cameron_?" He shouts, dropping his poleax and thrusting his hands into the sky. "Of all the other people to send through, you choose the guy with _no fucking coordination whatsoever? __**Fuck you old man**_!"

"Look, Julian, I'm not particularly happy about this whole situation either." I huff. "...so, old man dropped you in here and all?"

Julain shrugged, brushing that annoying as hell bang of dyed orange hair out of his face. "Kinda. It's complicated, I vaguely remember drowning, then I woke up underwater. Then Kylar pulled me out, a few weeks later I had a dream involving the old guy, I got one vague answer, and then stuff happened and I met up with Gregor. Cool guy, we were mercenary partners for a month."

"...who the fuck is Kylar?" I'm not in any fit state to continue the conversation properly, but god dammit one of my classmates just showed up with a fuckoff huge poleaxe and has been here for a while.  
Julian just glanced at my leg, kind of worried. "...Does that heal up?"

"Yeah, it's nowhere near as bad as Virion's, and he was healing up fine when Anna started." I shrug, wincing as it dragged across the sand. "Now, who the hell is Kylar?"

"Okay, so the old man gave you the whole speech on how you can upgrade yourself, right? Well, I decided to train myself a little more than getting preset skills in exchange for...uh..."

At that moment a piercing shriek shot through the sky and a winged _something _completely ripped one of the other Grimleal members that neither of us had noticed to shreds.

"...you gave yourself a goddamn _GRIFFON?!_" I scream over the noise. Oh mother of god his Alternate is going to be so overpowered isn't he? Any gods that are listening, please, do _not _let his Alternate be as mentally twisted as mine.

"Yep." He grinned. I couldn't get one of the stereotypical apologetic Canadians, could I, I had to get the only arrogant smartass. "Want a lift back to your lines?"

"We should probably check in on Nowi and Gregor at some point." I winced, trying to stand up. "...although some healing would be amazing, not gonna lie."

"Well, get on him then." He strapped his poleaxe to the side of the griffon – gods, he gave himself a _griffon –_ and pulled me up onto his back. "By the way, you might want to hold on. I don't know if you've flied before, but it's a lot worse than a pegasus."

"It wasn't by choice." I grumble. "How much worse can it beee_eeeeeeee_"

Much faster, much much faster, but also a lot less stable. Julian's laughing like a frigging maniac as he dove down towards the oasis. "Thatta boy, Kylar!"

"_GODS JULAIN SLOW DOOWWWWWWWWWN!_"

"Oh, the gods habit wore off on you too? Awesome!" Julian grinned. "Just hold on."

Kylar landed in a massive blast of wind that almost knocked Robin over. Oh, god, his Alternate is going to be so overpowered – as he met him yet? I'm going to need to have that conversation with him.

"You alright, pal?" Julian joked, jumping off and pulling me down. No, don't jar the leg _oh that hurts_. I am dangerously close to passing out again – oh, there it goes...

* * *

I am fed up of that happening. It's seriously starting to piss me off. Okay, let's see who's here right now – hello, Robin.

"Okay, how'd we do?" I groan, sitting up. Robin shrugged.

"Better than we had any right to. You and Virion almost died, but we healed you in time. Your friend's proving very useful. How do you know him, anyway?"

"Old friend." I sigh, sitting up. "Wasn't exactly my best mate or anything, but he's here now so I'm thankful for that."

Okay, technically he wasn't even my friend, seeing as I've not even talked to him that much outside of class, but we were making plans to start a D&D game together at some point before I got sucked into this whole place, so I guess you could qualify it.

"Did he have a griffon back then and all?"

"No, that's...that's new." I chuckle. "Who fixed me up?"

I flex my leg and bounce to my feet. Nice, I'm not collapsing under my own weight. That's always good.

"Anna did. She's pissed by the way." Robin sighed. "She was ranting about how you'd promised you'd be more careful and how she was going to send you straight back to the hospital bed as soon as you woke up."

"Wonderful." That's...that's just perfect. "And what's your assessment?"

"You broke the deadlock, so thanks for that." Robin shrugged. "I'm going to have to start remembering that your shield is apparently indestructible or something like that, it should come in useful at some point."

"It's incredibly convenient for the suicide charge plan." I agree. "Just might want to clear backup before I do it next time, right?"

Robin blinked. "Well, you should have given more more than a few seconds of foreknowledge about the plan if you wanted covering fire."

I rolled my shoulders before deciding not to push my luck and getting back on the bed, making sure I was comfortable. "Why did I even have to do that? Where were Cordelia and Sumia, why weren't they doing the take-out-the-targets-of-opportunity thing?"

"Oh, give us some credit, our fliers were busy checking on the other two." Robin grumbled. Okay, so he was concerned about the potential civilians, that's good to know, he's the compassionate type not the kind of guy who'd suggest leaving Emmeryn to die even though I'm going to as well and I promised not to think about that decision anymore stop it. "They're fine, by the way. They're actually kind of good people-"

"Yeah, Julian told me about them." I sigh. "Where is he, anyway? I need to talk to him in private for a few minutes."

Robin nodded and stood up, closing his book. "By the campfire, with the others. I'll go tell them you've woken up."

A few moments later and Julian's back in, an incredulous look on his face. "You bitch at me for getting a griffin and you've got a shield which literally blocks _anything_?!"

"Yeah, yeah, I know, I'm a hypocrite." I sigh. "Look, did you know about the Alternate stuff?"

"The what?" Julian frowned. Oh, god.

"Alright, look. We're called 'Outsiders', right? The old man called you that too?" I tried to find some common ground, thankfully he nodded. "Okay, so you see, when an Outsider is introduced, the universe balances it out by introducing a second new person with the same memories and a similar appearance called an Alternate. Mine is called Lucien, and he's an overpowered son of a bitch who's kind of like the Heath Ledger Joker mixed with Goku."

"That's horrifying." Julian joked, smirking. "How come you're so scared of him?"

"Julian, act smart for five seconds." I grumble, glaring at him. Julian just shrugged, his scale armor jingling as he did so.

"Look, so there's an evil me running around, so what?" He scoffs. "I'll deal with him-"

"Julian, they get stronger the more you change." I glare. "I fixed my dyspraxia and gave myself actual fighting skills, you gave yourself fighting skills and a _goddamn griffon_. We are _screwed._"

Julian opened and closed his mouth a few times before settling on a disturbed frown. "...aw, crap." He sighs. "Well, I guess the situation's already FUBAR beyond repair. Might as well go the full deal."

"I'm sorry?" Oh, you son of a bitch, don't say it.

"I've been thinking...I'm gonna save Emmeryn from her fall." Julain said, dead serious. "Kylar's faster than any pegasus, I'll grab her before Aversa can even summon all those archers."

"Julian..." I hiss, going quiet in the hope that anyone nearby would go away. "If Emmeryn lives, the war with Plegia goes on for _much _longer because she doesn't demoralize the enemy army."

Julian scoffed, sitting down in a chair. "Don't tell me you're finally succumbing to all that needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few greater good bullcrap. Weren't you the one always saying that the means are more important than the ends?"

"Julain, that was _different_" I protest weakly. "This is literally the lives of thousands. It's like the atom bombs, the Americans killed hundreds of thousands in order to save the lives of millions more."

"And in doing so ushered in a new era of people living in horror." Julian grinned, knowing he won the argument. "Look, Cameron – if the Alternates have all this knowledge we do, they'll predict everything too. We need to even the playing field, introduce a new player that neither of us know what they'll do."

...god _damn _him.

"Fine. Let's FUBAR everything." I groan, slumping back in my chair. "We're gonna regret this so much..."

"Hey, your conscience will be clear." Julian shrugged. "Just in case, d'you think you could distract Aversa while I grab the queen?"

"...the last time I did that I got thrown off a cliff!" I say incredulously. Julian's eyes twinkled as he started to laugh.

"Well you're still here, aren't you?" He asked through his fit of giggles. "I'm sorry, it's just the idea of you getting thrown off a cliff is so-"

"So what?" Anna asked dangerously from the door, hands on her hips. "Can I talk to him?"

Julian frowned, glanced at me, and then glanced at Anna again, clicking his tongue. "Listen, girlie, this guy's one of my oldest friends" Not quite true "So if you don't mind could you-OW!"

It's fun to see Anna slap other people sometimes.

"Look, I don't care if you're from another dimension like him, get the hell out." Anna hissed. Julian glanced at me, surprised.

"You told someone else?" He said in mock despair and a little bit of what was most likely very real panic. "How come?"

"Lucien." I said darkly. "She...snapped me out of it."

His head rotated from me to Anna about five times before he finally said something else. "...you lucky _bastard._" He said, fairly jealous if I do say so myself. "You lucky, lucky bastard...you know what? Fine, have your 'Sorry for almost dying' sex, I'm gonna go see if a man can get drunk out in the desert."

"We don't have any alcohol." Anna said quickly, temporarily going into quartermaster mode and probably shoving the sorry for almost dying sex part out of her mind. "All of the barrels the villages gave us had water."

Oh yeah, wonder if we have master seals yet. We're meant to get some from those villages, aren't we?

"Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure Gregs had a wineskin before the crap went down in the slave market and we tried to make a run for it." Julian grumbled. "I'm sure he'll take pity on his poor despondent partner in mercenarydom and give me a gulp...or ten."

With that he floundered – _floundered,_ who does that? Frigging hipster – out of the tent, leaving me alone with an irritated redhead.

"Alright, Anna, look, I know you're pissed, but-"

"You broke your promise." Anna said flatly. Oh that...that hurt. Alright? That really, really hurt. Crap, she's like my dad, if she's screaming she's not that angry but when she gets quiet you should be scared. "You promised me you would be more careful, but you just ran out in front of everything."

"What was I supposed to do? We were going to get massacred if I didn't stop those mages, Anna." I tried to reason. Anna scowled at me.

"Julian showed up and dealt with the rest-"

"-he wasn't a known quality. Come on, Anna, I wasn't going to let any of you die." I plead. Anna groaned and sat down next to the bed, biting her lip and changing the subject. Thank the gods, I don't think I could have continued that conversation.

"So...he's going to have his version of Lucien?"

"Yeah." I sigh. "I don't know what he's going to be like, Lucien's letting all of you live to mess with me. I don't know if his is just a rampaging murder machine, or legitimately doesn't care about anyone but him, or just doesn't have any emotions whatsoever and treats it like a job."

"Fun." Anna sighed, pulling out a coinpouch. "So, do you know how much we made off of the mages' equipment?"

"You mean the guys we killed? You looted the bodies?" Really? Anna sniffed and turned away from me.

"We're at war. Additional revenue is important." She said primly. "Besides, they were chasing a little girl. Even if she is thousands of years old and can turn into a dragon, at some point you lose any civil rights you may have had upon your death."

"Fair enough. Go on, then." I sigh, getting comfortable as she started to get fairly excited. "How much?"

"Well, their armaments were fairly used, so we only got twenty gold per armament on average, but there were a few dozen..."

**  
A/N: ...so, uh, what a tweest? Look, I tried twenty times to write all of that battle, so I'm sorry for resorting to Cameron Falls Unconcious again, but at some point you've got to admit defeat. Anyway, the only plot point that changed in the edit (If you decided not to reread) is that Cameron was in the original timeline. I'm getting worried about the amount of profanity in this fic, but the more I try to cut it down the less accurate I am of my own thought process (...I had a hard time in highschool, I'm not exactly a G-rated person to talk to, and it takes physical effort for me not to curse in Time Matters Not and stuff) and I've been thinking of boosting this up to M based on that alone. If I do, it'll let me do some more graphic violence in particular, which would be cool to explore, in case I decide to write any _Hannibal _fics in the future which is rapidly becoming a possibility with how awesome that show is.

So, one final note:

FUCK.

THIS.

CHAPTER.

IN.

PARTICULAR.

Seriously, this took way too damn long to write, and it's only 2500 words of actual content instead of author's notes. I hope to get back to every 3-4 days for this now that this awkward bullcrap is out of the way, while keeping Fool of Fools going every day or two, and TMN maybe twice a month or so. Good? Good.


	20. Chapter Nineteen (Cam XIX

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Nineteen – Flying Circus**

"...look, my lad, this parrot is dead. It's bleeding demised. It has passed on and gone to meet its maker, it has ascended into heaven and joined the choir invisible, if you hadn't nailed it to the porch it would be pushing up the daisies!" Julian paused dramatically, keeping a finger in the air. "...this...is an _**ex-parrot**_**.**"

"That didn't happen to him, remember. He's making it all up." I say with a smirk. "Or stealing someone else's material, one of the two. Probably the second."

The chuckles around the campfire increased as Julian pouted at me. Okay, so having someone to quote Monty Python with is – oddly – the best part of him showing up.

That and the fact that we're gonna FUBAR everything. That's...that's an odd thought. I'd set myself on letting Emmeryn die, in order to go for the 'best path' as according to the game, but this ass comes in, completely throws my reasoning out of the window and happily proclaims that he's going to do it.

Somewhere along the line I decided to help him, too.

"Look, I didn't always want to be a mercenary." Julian said, a grin growing wide. "I wanted to be...a _lumberjack!_"

"NO! NO SINGING! I FORBID YOU TO SING!" I shout, throwing a used spoon at him. A brief skree from behind him made me think that even Kylar agreed with me on that account.

It took practically no time to start thinking about the griffon as a person instead of a thing. No, seriously, it's been half a day since we started marching, and then night was on us.

Seriously, it took practically no time. I keep expecting it to start angsting about how immortality sucks, but thankfully he's not _quite _as emo as his namesake. Still a bit broody, though. Let's just stop thinking about the Night Angel books before you get reduced to a blubbering mess because you remembered how the immortality works.

Right, I need a new topic to think about...uh...yeah, that'l work.

A brief discussion with Anna, and I found out what happened to the Master and Second seals.

They're frigging clothing clasps. I wish I was kidding. No effects whatsoever, they're basically medals – the Master seal is essentially a Victoria Cross, which was interesting to learn. The largest number ever given out was by Marth during his second war, while the Second Seal is basically a Mention in Dispatches – you were useful, and brave, but not spectacular. Chrom pretty much promised that we were all going to get one when this is over, which I'm honestly not surprised by. Well, I guess I can't ask Fire Emblem logic to become that game-y when I'm in here. It sucks that I now don't have a magic bullet to one-up Lucien, though.

"NOBODY CAN FORBID ME FROM SINGING!" Julian huffed, standing up tall. Gregor groaned and placed a palm on his forehead, shaking it back and forth.

"Ay, not again..."

"That bad, huh?" Robin asked the mercenary through a mouthful of spaghetti. Thank you, Stahl, thank you so much. Leave some more for the people who didn't cook next time, though, you went through four bowls before remembering to serve us. Ass.

"You have no idea." I groan. "He likes it, but all he can do is play that stupid guitar of his. He can't actually sing."

"Yeah, and the guitar was lost at the bottom of an ocean." Julian sighed. "No Queen songs tonight, I'm afraid."

"And, if the gods are good, never again." I said darkly into my pasta before spooning up another mouthful. I'm absurdly thankful that Stahl and Sully caught up with us, bringing fresh weapons and information with them. They'd had to abandon the carts due to a Risen ambush, but there's not much you can do about that.

I'll admit I'm mostly glad that Stahl's cooking for us again.

"Oh, toniiiiight, I'm gonna have _myseeeeelf_ a real goood time-" Julian started with a grin. He shut up when I hurled my now-empty bowl at his forehead. "Yeesh, touchy~"

"I warned you, you ignored the warning." I grumble, stretching. "Who's on dish duty?"

"Julian." Robin said with a grin.

"Oh, good. I already gave him my bowl...here's the rest."

Julian's eyes widened as I sent my cup, spoon and fork hurtling towards him. "JACKASS!" He yelled after managing to catch them all. I just smirked and wandered off, waving.

"I'mma go sleep, see you tomorrow guys." I yawned. Time to get sleep. Lesse, approach the wagon, and...huh, curtain's drawn shut.

"Anna, you in there?" I ask, rapping the doorframe. A startled yelp and a brief clattering confirmed the fact. "...am I good to come in?"

"Yes, yes! I'm fine! Don't worry!" Anna said. Shrugging, I lifted the curtain up and pulled myself inside with a grunt – look, it's a good meter off the ground, give me a break (Who am I even justifying myself to? [your own self esteem {this is getting a little too absurd even for my thought process} Let's just stop then shall we] yes, dear god let's stop having a conversation with myself in three directions. Wait, does that make you Id, Ego and Superego? {Go to hell, Freud Wannabe} Fine, fine, shutting up).

"...what on earth did you do?" I said in disbelief. "It looks like a bomb went off-I mean, a tornado hit this place."

Right, they would't get that expression. Still, it's accurate – there's spare weapons everywhere. I actually don't know how she made this big a mess without cutting herself.

"Don't say anything." Anna sighed, sucking one of her fingers – okay, she did get _a _cut, even if it is rather minor – and pulling up the first stack of swords. "Just help me put this away."

"Yes, boss." I sigh, grabbing the axes clearly labeled 'Vaike' and chuckling when I saw the wriststrap that somebody – probably Mirel – had tied on. That was a novel idea.

"Boss?" Anna said indignantly. "I don't order you around _that _much."

"Yes you do, dear." I sigh, rolling my eyes and grabbing a few bundles of arrows. "But then again I get to sleep in the comfy new supply wagon we picked up to replace the last one, so I'm not complaining."

Anna smirked. "Yes, speaking of sleeping, we were running low on kindling, so I used your bedroll and blanket to start the fire earlier."

"WHAT?" Oh you've got to be kidding me. "WHY?"

"Oh, I don't know...I didn't feel like spending money on firewood." Anna sighed. "Pine burns horribly, and decent oak is so expensive around here-"

"WHY MINE?!" Wait, she wouldn't would she? "WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO SLEEP?"

"Oh, I guess we'll have to share. It was my fault, after all." Anna turned around and smirked at me.

...crafty she-devil. "Uh, Anna, I'm not entirely sure I'm comfortable with this-"

"I am. Deal with it." She simpered, spreading out the bedroll. That is, uh...that is extremely small. I'm not entirely sure I'm actually going to be sleeping tonight. "I'm going to go and get changed."

"...uhuh." I managed to squeak out as she wandered off to the part of the cart we'd blocked off with a curtain for that purpose. I'll just take the chainmail off, it's not like I have many other clothes (That's a problem I need to fix) – I probably stink, to be honest. I never got a chance to get washed before we got attacked.

Wonderful, good job Cameron. First time sharing a bed with a woman, and you stink of iron, sweat and copious amounts of blood of others and your own.

It seems I'm obscenely lucky in battle, and at any other point the universe hates me. Whatever, I'll deal.

Oh, god, she's coming back out. Don't look at her nightgown (why is it so lacy dear god DON'T LOOK), face the other way...okay, she's not saying anything about it. Thank god, she's not pushing it. I don't think I'd be able to handle that.

* * *

"I thought Chrom told you two he didn't want a pregnant quartermaster?" Robin said with a smirk as I blinked awake, wiping the cold water he'd just tossed all over me out of my eyes.

"If it wasn't for the fact that I really needed a shower, you'd be dead by now, mate." I said calmly. Anna, who was wringing the water out of her hair while keeping the sheets pulled up to her chest, glared at him.

"I'm tempted to stab him myself if he doesn't leave soon." She hissed. "Prices aren't the only thing I can cut in half."

Robin wisely decided to leave quickly, muttering something about a strategy meeting as I grabbed my chainmail and headed out after him, letting Anna get changed by herself.

...don't go down that road, Cameron, if you go down that mental road you'll be turning around and going back and that will cause no end of problems.

On the bright side, it seems most of the camp was woken up with similar techniques. Gaius in particular looks pissed – I wonder how many candies were ruined by the water? - but none of us seemed to actively want blood.

Because if we did, I'm fairly sure we could take Robin right now. He looks suitably worried.

"Anyway..." Robin sighed. "Thank you for joining us this morning?"

"Get on with it." An angry Julian grumbled. Kylar – does that bird EVER leave his side? - shrieked in agreement, shaking water out of his wing feathers.

...did Robin seriously throw a bucket of water to wake up the man-eating giant bird? That's either the stupidest or bravest thing I've ever heard.

"Down to business, then." Robin said under his breath, rolling out a map over the table. "Emmeryn's execution is forty-eight hours from now. Information that Basilio and Flavia's forces have sent us say he's going to throw her off of Grima's skull." He said matter-of-factly, remarkably calm. "The plan is for the majority of us Shepherds to be another distraction, while Phila and her pegasus knights save her."

"...the pegasus knights currently locked up in a prison." Lon'qu grunted. Gaius nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, bubbles, I don't think you've actually thought this one out." He snarked, wiping a lollipop with a cloth before sticking it in his mouth.

"Well, that's why I said the majority." Robin said lightly. "A small group will have to go and free Phila and her troops within this timeframe. They'd have to be fliers, or they wouldn't make it in time."

"Oh, wonderful. Another chance to be the big damn heroes, right Kylar?" Julian said with a grin, nudging the griffon who fixed his – Master? Companion? I don't even know what their relationship is anymore – with a cold glare out of one of his eyes. Julian sighed and tapped the bird's beak before turning back to the briefing. "You need to lighten up, bird."

"Skree."

"Shuddup." Julian grumbled. "Right, sorry. So, what d'you want us to do?"

Robin pointed at the location of the prison, slightly to the north of the capital. "I want Cordelia to assume command of the flight, and for all of you to select one partner to accompany you on the mission."

"Six soldiers to hit one probably heavily guarded prison? Wonderful, I'm not volunteering." Gaius sighed. Robin fixed him with one of his you're-going-to-regret-saying-that smiles.

"Gaius, you're being volun_told_. They're going to need someone to pick the locks. Ride with Sumia."

Gaius groaned and nodded in reluctant confirmation. Alright, please pick me Julian, the plan won't work without me.

"I'm gonna take Cameron, he knows how to work with me." Julian shrugged. "Also, that shield might come in handy."

"...fair enough. Well, there goes the let's-have-everyone-stand-behind-Cameron plan." Robin sighed, scrunching up a piece of paper and throwing it away. Wait, that was an actual plan? The hell? "Cordelia, who's your choice?"

"I'll take Anna. We might need healing to get Phila and her soldiers up to strength, and she can fight too." Cordelia said after a moment's hesitation."

"Good call." Robin grunted. "Alright, you six might want to get suited up. Stahl, seeing as both of our quartermasters are going to be out of it, you're in charge of that wagon for now."

"Sure thing, Robin." Stahl sighed. "...one question – where's the captain?"

"The captain is right here." Chrom said, walking up from behind us. Oh...holy wow. That's very shiny armor.

"Upgrading are we, cap?" Julian said with a raised eyebrow. I'd assume so, mate, that's the Great Lord armor. Look, he's even got the Fire Emblem with him, all strapped to his arm as a shield – heh.

"What's so funny, Cameron?" Chrom asked with a glance. I shook my head and stopped chuckling.

"Just thinking that if you're planning on using a shield, I might finally be better at fighting than you by pure fact of you not knowing what you're doing." I managed to choke out. Chrom cracked a grin and nodded in my direction.

"I'll be sure to ask for lessons when we get back. Now, then, Robin...are we ready?"

Robin glanced around and sucked in a breath. "Pretty much. The signal for Phila and her troops to swoop in will be me, Miriel and Ricken releasing our spells straight into the air at the same time. Good luck, everyone."

Assorted other goodwishes were sent out among the party – I _think _Kellam shook my hand, it kind of pumped the air for a second, so I just took my chances and said thanks to him anyway – and then we were off.

...Words cannot describe how much I _detest _flying.

* * *

There's the prison. Okay, apparently fliers have some sort of sign language they use for when they're going this fast hat Julian must have learned automatically when he asked for Kylar from the Old Man, because he's been making finger chopping motions at Cordelia for the last few minutes.

Right, prison. It's a big stone square. No, seriously, no windows or anything – I can see their pegasi, I guess those must be kinda valuable if they weren't going to kill the. They're all tied up outside.

Cordelia raised her hand, signed at us, and then chopped down at the pegasi.

"Does that mean-?" I shout out over the wind. Julian nods and grabs hold of the reins a bit tighter.

"We're going down! Hold on tight!"

Oh no.

"SKREEEEEEEEE!"

OHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGODOHGOD OHGOD

Sand was blasted into the sky as Kylar suddenly ripped to a stop just off the ground, his wings sending forward a gust of air that knocked the two guards onto their backs before covering them with even more sand.

I hate the desert.

Let's get off this damn thing already – okay, I'm off. Cheers for the lift, Kylar, but I'll stick to the ground.

"So, how we gonna save Emmeryn?" Julian asked casually as he dismounted and gave the guards – who were slowly getting back up – a few solid kicks to the head. I shrugged, pulled out a knife, and started hacking at the ropes holding the first of twenty pegasi back.

"Dunno. I reckon you drop me in front of Aversa before she can summon the risen, and then pick up Emmeryn yourself. Make sure I've got evac because I'd rather not fall off the mountain again."

"Again?" Julian raised an eyebrow as he sawed another of the pegasi away. "That's an interesting story."

"I'll tell you later." I grunt, freeing a fifth. "Alright, I'm gonna go in and help out Cordelia and the rest. Watch the pegasi."

"Yeah, yeah..." Julian sighed. "Give my regards to the wife, will you?"

"Piss off, mate."

* * *

Thankfully, it looks like most of the guards are preoccupied by the frontal assault Cordelia, Sumia and Anna launched to cover Gaius' entry into the prisons, or at least I really hope that's the reason he's the only other one here.

"Hey." Gaius sighed as he fiddled with the door into the section that should be holding the Pegasus Knights. "What kind of timeframe are we on?"

"Took us five hours to get here, and we've been here one hour. Free them, move away to a space to recuperate for...six hours?...and then head over and wait for the signal." I said, biting my lip and hoping my math's correct. Gaius grinned as the lock clicked and the door swung open to reveal dark steps leading down.

"Piece of cake." He boasted, giving yet another lollipop a satisfied lick. "Let's see, then..."

At the end of the stairs, Gaius turned right while I went left, a handful of concoctions in my hands in case they need emergency care. Grabbing one of the torches on the wall, I frowned as the hall got narrower and narrower, and deeper and deeper.

...solitary confinement...?...must be.

Yeah, that's the one door. I should be able to force the lock open. Let's have a look inside – well, you're a mess, Phila. Still, just the woman I wanted to see right now.

I began working my way through what I'm going to say to her while stabbing my sword through the waterlogged door's lock and breaking my way in.

Phila groaned from the floor, scars criss-crossing her arms. I knelt down and raised a concoction to her lips – she's only half-conscious or something.

"Come on, get up. We've got a royal to save." I grinned as she became slightly more lucid and

gained the ability to walk.

"...shepherd?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know, you can't remember my name." I sighed. "Not that I'd blame you in your current state, to be honest. Look, let's just get you out of here."

"sorry...thought you were traitor. Heirarch?" Her eyes widened in panic as she tried to run towards the door, only to fall over. "Chrom? Is he safe?"

"Yeah, Phila, don't worry about it. Lon'qu and I got the bastard." Accurate enough. "He tried to have Lissa assassinated – she's fine too."

Better not mention that Lon'qu seems to be well on the way to S Support, to my great personal pleasure. Phila slumped against the wall, her white hair reaching just below the shoulders now that it wasn't in the bun.

"Thank you." She sighed. As footsteps rumbled down the hallway, I frowned and grabbed my sword – I really hope I'm better with this now, because support her takes up my shield arm.

"Don't thank me yet." I grumble as they grew closer. Wait, never mind, that's a lot of red.

Seriously, it's like team redhead, what with Gaius, Anna, Cordelia and Julian's stupid hair dye.

"Hey guys!" I grin, lowering the sword. "I found Captain Phila – do I win a prize?"

Cordelia breathed a sigh of relief and lowered her lance. "Maybe later. We've got to move before they send reinforcements."

It looks like the rest of the knights are in better condition than Phila, fortunately. They don't need supported as we ran as fast as we could to the exit, where Julian was flipping a coin and talking to Kylar.

"-and they leave me here like a glorified birdkeeper, can you believe that?"

"Skree."

"I'm not talking about you, I mean the pegasi, you dumb bird. Honestly, I don't care that Cameron's been here longer than me, he shouldn't be able to order me around like that!"

"I can, and he made a good call keeping you out." Cordelia said firmly, walking over to her own pegasus. "Do you need help, Captain?"

Phila shook her head, color returning to her skin as the concoction finally worked its way through her system. "I'll feel better once I'm in the sky. Where's Prince Chrom?"

"Being a distraction." Julian grunted as he ruffled Kylar's feathers and climbed into the saddle. "Don't blame us, yell at our tactician later."

Phila sighed and slumped her shoulders. "What's the plan-"

"We should explain on the way." Julian cut her off. "We've not got much time, Kylar can smell black magic getting closer."

Kylar snorted and gestured towards the west. "Skree."

"Yeah, if he can pick it up from this far, it's a lot of shamans. We might want to move." Julian said quickly, pulling me up into the back of the saddle. "C'mon, you dumb bird – let's get out of here!"

As the rest of the pegasus knights clambered into the saddle, Kylar and Cordelia's pegasus – what was his name? Hyperion? - leaped into the air. Wonderful, more flying. I _hate_ flying.

* * *

A/N: And I am _back in the game!_ I think this ~3500 word a chapter every 3/4 days is going to work out for me, and I'll slow down on the Fool of Fool's front (I needed a break after the gorefest that was CH7 anyway, and I'm not depressed enough to start the angstfest of CH8-9 yet), and start work on the honeymoon chapter of TMN. Honestly, cheers for averaging over 10 reviews a chapter, and I stopped looking at the hits because there's a 'k' after most of them and that makes me feel a teeny bit overwhelmed.

Especially considering this is just another self-insert fic.

ANYWAY if you're looking for other FE: Awakening stuff to read hit up _Potentia Amoris _and _Of Wyverns and Men_, both really well done and well paced stories (I don't even like Cherche that much and _Of Wyverns _is still enjoyable – kind of the same thing I had with Tharja in _Deliverance_). The wordcount for _Of Wyverns _in particular is frankly insane, especially considering the update speed.

Komina is a writing _machine._


	21. Chapter Twenty (Cam XX)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty – S**

"How bad is she?" I sigh, running a hand through my hair. An exhausted Anna slumps down next to me, breathing heavily.

"I think she'll be up to fighting, but not 100%." She sighed. "Gods, I can't imagine the things they'd done to her."

So, turns out Phila was in a much worse state than she was letting on, as the Plegians had broken out every torture trick in the book – and Gangrel was smart enough to realize that Phila was the only one who knew anything.

After her initial collapse off her pegasus when we landed, we discovered multiple burns, scars, and odd distorted patches of skin that Anna claimed were rushed healing of broken bones. No wonder she got one-shotted during the cut scene, she must have been a complete mess. Thankfully, Robin had the foresight to send a healer.

"...how are you?" I asked hesitantly. Anna groaned and glanced into the air – oh, wow, she's pale.

"I'm not sure." She chuckled. "It's just...healing takes a lot out of you, sometimes."

We sat there in comfortable silence for a few minutes, staring at the stars, before she groaned and rolled over.

"I miss my bedroll already."

I chuckled and just kept looking at the sky. Well, okay, there's not a single shared constellation. Wonderful, even more small things I don't know anything about. "Try and sleep anyway."

"You're not making any effort." Anna shot back.

"I can't sleep without something on top of me." I shrugged. It's true, I've never been able to sleep without a blanket or sleeping bag or _something_ on top of me. I don't know why. Still, there was a brief stunned silence as Anna processed what I said.

"That...wasn't exactly subtle, but sure."

Oh. _Oh_.

"What? No, I was telling the truth DON'T LIE DOWN ON ME-"

Too late.

Okay, Cameron, you are faced with a situation most people would kill for. Don't fuck it up. Don't make any comments about how awkward it is, and for the love of god don't say she's heavy.

...

I'm having difficulty breathing.

"This is comfier." Anna sighed. Hurk. Get off of me.

"For you, maybe." I groan with difficulty. "I can hardly breathe."

"Are you saying I'm heavy?"

DANGER.

DANGER, WILL ROBINSON.

Thankfully, I don't have to respond to that loaded question because she rolled off, laughing. "Oh, you should have seen your face."

"Who are you, Lissa?" I grumble, pulling myself up into a sitting position. Anna sighed and glanced at everyone else, where Julian was currently trying to retrieve his portion of tonight's meal from Kylar, who had stolen his bowl and wasn't giving it back.

"I don't think I'd want a mount." She smiled. "He makes it look like more work than it's worth."

"Actually, I'm convinced that's just how they work." I smirk as Kylar grabbed his sleeve and proceeded to engage in a fearsome tug-of-war with his rider. "I almost get the impression that they hate each other."

"LET GO OF MY SHIRT, YOU DUMB BIRD!" Julian's scream spread through the camp, attracting a small crowd of women that immediately began cheering for Kylar. I probably shouldn't read too much into that.

"I can see why." Anna giggled. "...so, is there anything you want to tell me?"

Oh, boy, she's looking kinda...can't tell if that's pissed off or scared. Maybe both. Well, sod it.

"Julian and I are going to do something incredibly stupid tomorrow." I sigh. "Okay? I told you in advance, you're not allowed to hit me."

"What exactly?" She narrowed her eyes and glared at me. Wow, scary woman.

"We, ah...might...be going after Emmeryn on our own. NOT FOR GLORY, for...reasons."

"Reasons." Anna said flatly. Okay, that's a dangerous tone of voice, danger zone has been approached, spill everything before she kills you and ruins your first even successful romantic relationship.

"...okay, story time." I grumble, pulling myself up. Okay, let's just check there's nobody else in earshot...there isn't good. They're all cheering as Kylar hoists of Julian into the air by the back of his shirt – huh, that is impressive FOCUS. "You know that universe I come from? Through the outrealm gate?"

"Yeah?" Anna murmured, snuggling up – why is she doing that that's really distracting, please stop.

"Could you not? I need to concentrate for this." I sigh. Anna shrugged, and just stayed there. Okay, so she's at the arm, but at least she's stopped moving. "...fine. Okay, long story short: This world was a story where I come from, and one of Gangrel's assistants summon a bunch of archer risen, and shoot down the pegasus knights, making Emmeryn jump so that Chrom doesn't give him the Fire Emblem and bring around the apocalypse."

Anna blinked. "..._well then_."

"Yeah. So, thing is, Julian's going to grab her while I make sure the assistant doesn't summon the risen."

"You could have told me that you knew everything that was going to happen." She said, slightly miffed. I just shrugged.

"Minor stuff's been changing anyway, and if we pull this off everything changes and prior knowledge becomes completely useless."

"You are _so _lucky that I'm used to crazy things like this happening." She huffed. "Seriously, though, you're not pulling my leg are you?"

"Woman, what would my motivations for that be?" I frown. "...and your reaction to the Exalt committing suicide is 'well then'?"

"You're going to save her, right? It's a non-issue, so...'well then' works." Anna shrugged, smiling. "Thanks for telling me this in advance."

"Yeah, well, I figured if I can't stop doing stupid things you might want to know before I do them." I groan. I really need to fix this improvising habit of mine.

"Oh, I don't know. It's kind of cute, to be honest. I've always been a little impulsive myself." Anna grinned at me, and wait isn't that kind of what she says in her S support with Robin?

...

oh god no. I'm sure as hell not ready for this.

"So, I've been thinking – we should get married."

...and there goes my sanity, and any semblance of an actual relationship with this madwoman.

"WHAT?!"

yeah, that seems like an appropriate response.

"You. Me. Aisle. After war." Anna said slowly, pointing back and forth.

"Anna, we've had one date! ONE! Hell, we've only kissed once, and to top it all off we might not even come back –" Why have we attracted a small crowd. _Why and how dammit Julian you can't even distract people properly WHAT GOOD ARE YOU?!_

I feel like I'm getting railroaded into something – wait. Okay, this is a long shot, but what if we have a future kid and time needs us to be married and...uh...let's not go there...before a certain point so s/he can be established in the timeline?

If this is the Old Man fucking with my head I'll actually kill him. Not sure how, but I'll find a way.

You know what? Sod it. She's stuck with me through all of this shit, even though we have only had one date, and the end of the war's still a way off (probably even longer than it is in game, seeing as we'll be saving Emmeryn so the army won't fall apart) so there's plenty of time to adjust to the idea.

...and now the crowd's staring at me. Seriously?

Anna, stop quivering your lip, it's not helping.

"-fuck it. Fine."

"See? Was that so hard?" Anna sighed, leaning back. "Oh, by the way, I still expect a ring."

"Yeah, yeah..."

"And a proper proposal."

"Yes, dear." I groaned. The crowd looks disappointed.

"Issat it?" Julian asked incredulously. "No...kissing, or passionate embraces, or stuff like that?"

"Julian, while I'm pleased that you are beginning to reveal to the world that you are a romantic sap, reducing any credibility you had even further -" I could have sworn Cordelia chuckled at that "-not everything is like the storybooks. Now piss off, I need to sleep." I grumbled. "And get a fresh shirt, you've got Griffon drool all over that one." Julian groaned and walked away, wiping at his shirt with a look of disgust, with the other pegasus knights wandering off too. Wait, did Cordelia just bite her lip while looking at us?

...I really hope we didn't give her any 'ideas' for how to approach Chrom, especially seeing that he's pretty much got his eyes set on Sumia at this point. If she does make her move and get rejected, I hope I'm nowhere near the fallout. That sounds like a crap thing to think, but there's not much I can do for her – I had, what, two sentences of conversation with her?

Why have I just managed to stop thinking about the fact that I'm engaged now? You know what? That's just how this world works, fuck it. We're in a war, people do stupid things when they don't think they're going to live – oh.

"Anna..." I said slowly. "...if this is just to reassure me that I've got something to go back to in order to make sure I didn't do something calamitously stupid, I was already aware of that and _wasn't planning to do so_. Are you sure you want to get into this?"

"Impulsive, remember?" Anna grinned. "...oh, yeah, and my birthday's in four days so if you could hurry up and do it properly by then that would be amazing. Get a good ring!"

"Impulsive isn't the same as...well, decisive!" I ran a hand through my hair. Does she just not get how serious this is or something. "Anna, I've had friends and family have their marriages fall apart because they rushed in way to fast. I...I don't want to be that guy, who looks you in the face and lies."

"That rhymes." Anna smirked, motioning for me to continue. Well, it should rhyme, I stole it from a MIKA song. I probably shouldn't quote the rest, considering the song's called 'I Only Love You When I'm Drunk'.

"Not the point, Anna." I sigh. "Look, I'll admit it. You've been my first...well, everything. Kiss, date...uh..."

I can't even fucking say it, can I? What kind of coward am I?

"Same here. What, is that not a good sign where you come from?" Anna smiled. "Besides, my parents were each other's first everything. Seems to be a good track record."

I groan into a hand, shaking my head. "Anna, I'm going to be perfectly honest here: I want to do this. Alright? I'd probably have fucked up everything in relation to you if you hadn't initiated all of it, so thanks for doing this, but...isn't it a bit early?"

Anna shook her head. "Nope, never is. Oh, yes, and by the way we're going to have to be working hard or we're not going to be able to rent a big enough hall for all my sisters and the army. So, one last check: We going through with this?"

"...like I said before..." I groaned, smiling despite the oncoming migraine. "Fuck it. Fine."

"So, you gonna finish that thought?" Anna grinned. "First kiss, date...what else?"

She's really gonna make me say it, isn't she?

Fine, then.

"...I love you, Anna. Now please stop pushing me about it."

What have I gotten myself into this time?

Quite honestly, as she kissed me I found myself not caring at all.

* * *

A/N: This is shorter than normal (By a lot) because it was originally the first half of one massive chapter detailing all of CH9 in-game, but I decided that this could be the brief calm-before-the-storm moment and I can have the full battle posted either later today or tommorow (I'll save the 20 chapter patting myself on the back for then). I'm hoping to have a break chapter done on Anna's birthday for in-universe reasons, but if I miss that deadline no biggie. I'm hoping to wrap up the first war with Plegia by the end of the month, at which point I'd take a month off from this to finish Fool of Fools and get some Time Matters Not/Sillies/Oneshots written up and out of my half-finished folder.

And that's why Fool of Fools hasn't updated for two weeks despite being a daily series. Either way, since this is CH20 (Multiple of 10!) there's the obligatory alternate-POV, this time a Julian segment, of one of his later visits to the Blue Room and his first encounter with Gregor.

* * *

**PARALOGUE – JULIAN I**

"Of all the games to play, did it have to be this?" The old man sighs, twirling his handlebar mustache. I just reached into the bag and pulled out yet another sourcebook. Old Man, you say you'll play an Earth game with me, you play THE Earth game.

Also playing D&D with a god is possibly the single most awesome thing I will ever do in my life, and I ride a Griffon.

"Hey, you wanted to kill time with me, this is what you get. What, are you not gonna summon some Einherjar and order them to play?" I huffed, dropping it on the table. "So...you DM'ing or should I?"

"This is stupid." The old man sighed, brushing down his red robes and leaning over the table. "...I'll play a Dragonborn Paladin."

"We're not playing 4th, 4th is stupid." I grinned. "We're playing 2nd. You didn't answer my question."

The Old Man groaned and sunk back into his chair. "Fine, fine. I'd summon some Einherjar...if I was Old Hubba. I've told you, I've told the other one-"

"Other one?" Interesting information. Wonder who that is.

"No business of yours." The old man snapped at me. "Not yet, anyway."

I opened the adventure module and shrugged, skimming it before frowning.

"Do you hear a faint rumbling?" I casually asked him. The old man glanced up behind me, froze, and smiled.

"I'm...just going to go."

With that, he vanished, and the blue room suddenly became very wet.

"GAH!"  
"SKREE!"

"WELL YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TOSSED A BUCKET OF WATER ON ME IF YOU DIDN'T WANT SOME TAIL FEATHERS PULLED, YOU DUMB BIRD!"

Wait...griffons can't fetch water.

"Ach, it wasn't the griffon that soaked you..." A large man rumbled. I smiled weakly and ringed out my shirt.

"Well, mister, you've got five seconds to explain why you did so." I said half-hardheartedly. "Before the bird and I decide to play tug-of-war with you."

"Skree."

"Gregor just wanted to ask if you could give lift to...not any village in a few hundred meters." The mercenary smiled. "Gregor kind of made employers very angry, as he quit. I didn't want to do what they did. Normally very reliable, though!" He added hastily. Probably thought I wasn't going to do it without being paid. "Gregor also generous, pays very well."

"You're a mercenary?" I asked, fixing Kylar's saddle as he kept an eye on Gregor for me. Gregor nodded eagerly. "Got contacts?"

"Yes, many!" Gregor grinned. "Gregor well-known sellsword of great value! Just slow to get places!"

"Recently, we've found ourselves in a bit of an, ah, monetary shortage." I grinned as Kylar blinked lazily. "What say I take you where you need to go, and you let me in on your contracts?"

"Skree."

"Okay, let _Kylar _take _us _where _we _need to go, and you let _us _in on your contracts." I changed once I finished clearing out my ear. Bird's loud.

Gregor narrowed his eyes at us. Hey, pal, I'm telling the truth. This bird is expensive to take care of. Then he gave out a booming laugh. "You care greatly for mount, is good! Gregor accept!"

"Then Julian and Kylar look forward to a long and beautiful partnership." I smirked, shaking his hand as Kylar wrapped his claw around us, making Gregor sweat. "Oh, and don't call the bird a mount, or even call him a bird. I'm the only one he lets get away with that."

"SKREE!"

"...point taken." Gregor winced, slapping the side of his head to clear his ear. "Still, closest contact is in Ylisse. Might want to get moving, ya?"

"What's the rush?" I asked, looking over his shoulder – oh, that's the rush.

That's a large mob.

"In fact, no time like the present!" I grinned, pulling myself up and giving Gregor my hand. "Hold on tight, this guy's fast. Got everything?"

"Ya, made sure I did." Gregor rumbled. "Gregor travels light."

"Alright, then. Let's go, Kylar!"

Flying feels free. The wind, the swaying, the speed – it's incredible. It's only enjoyable when you don't have a large mercenary clutching onto you and screaming in your ear. Well, this is my life. Wonderful.


	22. Chapter Twenty-One (Cam XXI)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-One – Emmeryn**

* * *

"It's taking them a while, isn't it?" Julian said casually. Kylar flapped his wings back and forth, keeping us in the one place (unpleasently rocky, though). Frown. It really is, I was hoping that Robin and co would have broken through the enemy lines and be approaching the courtyard by now.

"What's our plan again?" I know, but it can't hurt to go over the specifics one last time. Julian seemed to disagree, going from his sigh.

"Cameron, it's dead simple. As soon as they fell the enemy general and Gangrel starts making demands, we hightail it down there before Phila and the rest arrive and get shot down. I grab Emmeryn, and you buy me time."

"Yeah, you see, the bit I'm worried about is my buying you time." I grumble. "I don't appear to have an evac plan set up for me."

Julian frowned. "...bugger. Okay, right, uhm...I'll come back for you?"  
"Your confidence fills me with joy." I deadpanned, glancing. "...I'll jump off the cliff, don't let me die."

_**confusionanxiety**_

"I was told you didn't want a repeat of the cliff incident." Julian snarked with a grin. Shuddup, asshole.

"Yeah, well...needs must." I grumble. "Seriously, don't let me become a pancake. I'll fucking haunt you."

"Deal, deal..." Julian trailed off, squinting. "What's the odds of Robin trying to kill us for breaking the plan?"

"Pretty high if it doesn't work, nonexistent if it does. You should talk to him, nice guy-" Where did that roar come from?  
Julian slowly turned to me. "...you heard that too, right?"

Fuck.

_**shocksurprise**_

"WYVERN SQUADRON! SCATTER!" Phila shouted, and the pegasus knights flew apart instantly. "WHEEL, SURROUND THEM!"

"You see them, Cam?" Julian hissed as Kylar climbed up higher. "They must be using the cloud cover, 'cause I can't see-AGH!"

Julian slumped over, grimacing as a crossbow bolt protruded from his shoulder.

"JULIAN?!"

"I'm alive, don't worry. Came from in front...where the hell – oh, _TABARNAC__!_"

We are so fucking dead. Why is that thing so _big? _It's bigger than the last wyverns I saw, for sure. The figure on the back tossed his crossbow to the side and pulled another one from his saddlebags. Julian began a stream of assorted french curses that I couldn't recognize and forced Kylar into a spiralling dive.

_**angerjealousyhatred**_

"WHO THE HELL IS THIS GUY?!" He yelled as we shot away from him. Looks like the rest of the pegasus knights are occupied with the regular wyvern riders. That's not meant to happen, oh god this isn't meant to happen.

"Dunno." Fuck I don't do flying. "Probably your alternate."

"Now? Shit, these assholes have _perfect _timing don't they?" Julian grimaced, turning back to face forwards. "Arright, this is about to get rocky. Should we deal with this guy or grab Emm?"

"Grab Emm." I choke out. I don't do flying, and the sooner I'm on the ground the better. "We need an overwhelming advantage to bring these guys down."

"Fair enough. Arright, Kylar..." Julian braced himself. Crap, hold on tight Cameron... "Let's kick things up a notch! Full speed ahead!"

Wait that wasn't top speed _OH GOD WHY_

ARCHERS

FUCK

SHIT

"JULIAN!"

"I see 'em!" Julian grimaced. "...hold on tighter."

A slight twist on the reins, and Kylar span into a barrel roll and climbed back into the sky, away from the horde of risen archers.  
"You were meant to make sure that didn't happen!"

"PISS OFF, JULIAN!"

_**panicunknownqualitydealwithsayitshostile**_

The mega-wyvern and crossbow guy are still on our tail – wait, why is he getting shot by archers? Are we seriously lucking out? Holy fuck, he's turning the wyvern around and leaving! We are the single luckiest sons of bitches of all time!

_**relief**_

"Plegians! I ask that you hear the truth of my words!" Okay, no we're not. We trade one problem for another, as per fucking usual.

"Julian, she's gonna jump!"

"I can tell." He hissed. "...arright, we're going to have to risk the archers. You up for that, bird?"

"Skree." Kylar seemed to nodd. Emmeryn's glancing up at the skies...Phila and co are still fighting the wyvern riders, she's not gonna be saved from that area.

"Arright, here we go...hold on tight, Cam!"

You could practically feel the muscles in Kylar's body tense up as he prepared to go stupid fast. Wow, we're like a fucking bullet or something. Why doesn't he just make Kylar fly this fast in general?

_She's jumped _

_okay_

_we're not gonna make it to be underneath her_

_shit_

_uhm_

_improvise._

I grabbed onto the back of the saddle and threw myself off, grabbing the falling queen by the wrist. Something snapped, not sure if it was one of my bones or one of hers, and to be perfectly honest I don't care. Oh, right, archers – SHIT! I'M FALLING!

Not fucking again.

_**notfuckingagain**_

Okay, thankfully it wasn't that much of a fall. That explosion of sand over there must have been Kylar and Julian crash-landing, I'm not going to get any help from there. Where are we? Behind a collapsed pillar, okay, so we've got something resembling cover.

Good.

"Are you alright?" I groan, yanking the arrow out of my right arm. That must have been what made me fall. There's another one in my leg, and two more that just got mixed up in my chain mail.

Best investment I've ever made, I swear to god...

"I'm fine." Emmeryn gasped, sitting up against the sandstone column. "Thank you."

She says she's fine, but she's holding her right wrist somewhat carefully. I guess I must have broken it while catching her or something.

"Cool. Coolcoolcool." _**holyfuckheactuallydidit **_I glance over the top of the pillar, and duck back down again when I'm met with a swarm of arrows that clatter off the cliff. "...okay, change of mind. Bad. Badbadbad."

_**nolongerplayingbytherules...**_

I just realized this cover doesn't protect from anything on top of the cliff, and the air support we assumed we'd have is currently tied up. Wonderful. Alright, get prepped, attach shield to wounded arm and draw sword.

The rest of the fucking army better show up eventually, or we're both gonna die. Okay, Gangrel. Here to brag, you ugly insane motherfucker?

"Bwahaha! How disgustingly noble! The little lost lamb preferring to die instead of letting someone else fall! Pity you're both going to end up dead now...perhaps I'll gather up your bodies and put them on display?"

Why is he raising his sword? It's a fucking sword, what's it going to do – BLOOCK!

Okay, thank god for this shield of mine. Right, I forgot it shoots lightning like a motherfucker. Frigging Levin Swords, I swear to anything that'll listen. I'm gonna be in so much trouble.

"Sorry, crazy clown!" Bow mockingly. I'm gonna die anyway, let's go out like a boss. "I can't die yet, I'm getting married!"

Gangrel's snarl became significantly more fierce (probably because of my taunt rather than grief about him being forever alone), and he slashed with his sword three times. Three bolts, block dodge block. It's not actually that bad now that I'm anticipating it. Where the hell is Robin and the rest?

Glance over your shoulder – okay, they're engaging the archers. They're a decent bit off, though. Survive until they get here – oh, right, Aversa's up there with Gangrel too. What's she doing?

...is she summoning more risen? Are you serious? Okay, let's count...no, too many to count. This is bullshit. Okay, so, do I make a break for it with the exalt or stand and fight?

They've surrounded me, so that's no longer an option. Right, okay, fighting. Bollocks.

Back off so you're standing in front of/over the exalt, who's alive but has both a broken wrist and no magic, if she can even use magic and Sage wasn't just a placeholder class for her sprite. Time to see if I'm any good without backup.

I'm probably not, which is depressing. Also potentially fatal. Alright...let's try. First one, sword user, overhead swing. Block with shield, stab to stomach, move along. Second, axe user, also overhead swing. Sidestep, slash into stomach (apparently cutting it in half, but I guess it's just a mist monster or something like that so it's not too surprising that there's not much resistance) and block the lance user's thrust with the shield. Stab its throat. Step back to ensure you're still covering the exalt, two sword users attacking at same time from either flank. Shield to cover left, parry the right. Thank god I've been sparring with Lon'qu, I'd never be able to change which side I'm focusing on so quickly without it.

_**Suchimprovementinsuchashorttime?Twoyears...heh...l et'sleavehimtoit.**_

There's a lance user in front, crap. Okay, duck under it, charge forwards, knock him down with shield. Take out right-hand (previously left-hand) swordsman through slash to neck, use momentum to stab second swordsman in the head. Lance user's getting up, kick him in the head and coup-de-grace stab through the chest. Remainder: four. Wait, there were only ten? Aversa's loosing her touch.

The last four – two axes, two lances – rush me. Crap. Okay, block lance with shield, cut off arm of first axe user, spin under the second axe (hamstring on your way through) and AGH!

Second lance is in sword arm shoulder. Crap. Wait, where's the first lance – AGH!

Oh, crap, it's through my stomach. The second lance user's standing up – holding an axe, crap – and raises it up. He's gonna decapitate me. Wonderful. Well, I tried -

"I SAY WHEN IT ENDS!"

Isn't that one of Lucina's critical quotes?

Holy fuck, what is she _doing _here?

...where did the risen go?

Did she just take out both of them in like two seconds? Well, she's panting, so I guess she must have ran here. Oh, right, she shows up at the end of the chapter and moans about how she was too late.

"...you really need to talk to Robin." I groan as she leans over me and, wordlessly, proceeds to rip the lance out of my stomach. "OW!"

"Why's that?" She said distractedly – and a little on-guard. Okay, that's narrowed eyes not blush so that means it's not a crush (STOP SHIPPING) but more hatred for the poor guy. Right.  
"You've both very skilled when it comes to dramatic timing." I smirk. OW! SON OF A – DID YOU HAVE TO TWIST THE SECOND ONE WHILE PULLING IT OUT!? Oh, ignoring me now are you? Fine, be that way.

"Are you alright, Lady Emmeryn?"  
"Yes...thanks to Cameron and his friend."

Oh, _shit_, Julian.

"FUCK! JULIAN!" Okay, get up and – nope, nope, can't walk, leg was recently impaled. Right. Okay. Dammit. Let's try that again – not as quickly. Okay, a bit wobbly but whatever. Oh, hey, it's the rest of the army. Cool.

"Sister!"

Well, hello to you too Chrom and Lissa. I guess I can see where you're coming from, going to talk to your family member, but come on I literally threw myself off a bird to save her. A little appreciation would be nice.

Well, then I got saved by Lucina but for fuck's sake what is she, batman? Where did she go?

"She's got a bad habit of doing that." Robin sighed as he grabbed my shoulder. "You're...going to fall over."

"Julian. Is he alright?" I groan. Don't black out, you've blacked out enough times in your life, don't do it any more.

"Well, he broke four different bones and is currently unconscious but he'll live." Robin shrugged. "Kylar's broken his wing, but Panne checked him over and said he'd be fine. Now, we've got to get out of here before the rest of the army shows up...or the royal guard get down that hill."

Right, that's still an issue. Wonderful.

"Good point." I stagger forwards, pushing Robin away. Don't fucking faint. "The air force?"

"Casualties were high." Robin sighed. "We weren't expecting the wyvern riders, they were meant to be harassing Basilio's army."

Oh, gods. "Who made it out?"

"Phila, Cordelia, Anna, Sumia, Gaius and about four others. Don't worry." Robin nodded with a smile. "Hoping they lived over the others doesn't make you a bad person, it just shows concern for your friends."

"...thanks, Robin." Something finally clicked in my brain. "Panne checked him? How?"  
"She can talk griffon." Robin smirked. "Useful skill."

"Yeah...Julian's gonna be jealous." I laugh. "So, we getting out of here?"

"That's the plan." Robin jerked his head towards the east, where a holy crap that's a lot of Feroxi warriors. "That's our escape route. You up to marching?"

"If I fall over, tie me to a horse." I grimace. "Until then...I'll live."

_**survivedgood.**_

_** isa gamechanger...nice work, Cammie Boy. Next time, don't burn the book and I won't have to get inside your head.**_

Okay, so maybe I'd be okay with falling unconscious. Time to deal with this dumbfuckery.

_**Don't be like that**_

Fuck off, Lucien.

_**This took a lot of work, pal. Hell, at the start all I could do was give you my emotions, remember? And I can only do this shit while close...so, here's the deal. You've got one year seven months left before I come for you. I'm going to make sure you, your friends, and your potential friends live until I kill you in a duel. So, to that end...excuse me while I do a one-man 'fuck you gangrel' mission.**_

...thanks?

_**Thank me later, I'm the one who saved your ass from the motherfucking Drake Rider.**_

That wasn't a wyvern?

_**I'm sure its rider will explain herself when the opportunity comes. Now get a fucking move on.**_

"Cameron, we need to move."

"...sorry, Robin." I blinked the spots out of my eyes. Oh, god, that gave me a migraine. "Stress is catching up to me."

"I can imagine." He nodded. "But we seriously need to move now. Come on!"

With that, we started the long march towards the valley where Mustafa will be located and...perfectly willing to fight us, what with Emmeryn still being alive. I'm going to need healing.

"Need healing?"

THANK YOU GODS

"Anna, have I ever told you you're an angel?" I groaned, as the merchant hopped off the back of Cordelia's pegasus and pulled out a healing staff. She's covered in cuts, but nothing major – I'm fucking perforated, though, so healing would be great.

"That's a step down from goddess." She smirked, setting it against my leg and furrowing her brow as we walked. "What have I done recently?"

"Hey, healing a man – useful. Letting him ride in the cart rather than walk across countries – priceless."

"Oh? And getting said man to propose?" Welp, I'm back on dangerous territory. "Do you prefer riding in the cart to spending time in my company?"

"Riding in the cart is priceless. Spending time with you is a gift beyond such pitiful things as price and measurement."

"Oh, good save." Anna nodded, impressed.

"Thank you." Now I can't use that one again. She raises the staff up to the hole in my stomach – thank god it must have missed my organs, there's more evidence that my Luck is stupid high – and sighs. "We're going to need to pick up the pace in a second."  
At that moment, Panne walked past us while leading Kylar – an unconcious Julian on his back – on foot. The bird had its right wing tied up against its body, probably to keep it from moving and looked pissed off as fuck.

"Hey, Panne. Kylar."

"Greetings."

"Skree."

That was a brief encounter. Still, the fact that they – who were like five minutes behind the rest of us – were here forced us to pick up the pace a little more. So, we started jogging. Pain still shot up my leg every step I put on it – that must be the healing cramps – but I could keep moving. You know, I wonder what Lucien meant when he said he'd put together a diversion for us -

"Why aren't we being persued?" Chrom yelled. Frederick squinted off into the distance, then gasped.

"Plegia Castle is on fire!" He pointed. Oh, that's what he did! Clever. Say what you want about Gangrel, it was kind of motivated out of concern for his people, so he probably would go back and save some...or his own seat, depending on your interpretation of the character. Either way, it works.

Chrom just stares at it for a second, then starts to chuckle. It quickly becomes full-blown laughter.

"Your highness, while I appreciate the relief as much as you do, surely we must be sympathetic towards the civilians in there?" A priest said reproachfully. Hey, Libra.

Wow, you are exceptionally pretty. Okay, Cameron, two points: 1. That's a guy, 2. You're engaged. Okay, move along.

"Yes, such a shame." WOMAN, PUT SOME CLOTHES ON. "If they lived in the capital they must have supported Gangrel."

For fuck's sake, Tharja, wear something. Christ, between you and Aversa I'm seriously hating whoever did the Dark Mage outfit design, purely because it's giving me thoughts I should only be having for one person.

"Either way..." I pant as I walked up to them. "It happened, it's kinda funny from a dark humor perspective of how literally everything is going wrong for them, but we should maybe get a move on before they arrive, except angrier?"

Chrom shut up. "You're right. Let's move."

With that, we strode forwards. So...to recap. We saved Emmeryn, nobody died at all, and Lucien's decided he's going to actively help to ensure I fight him when we're meant to. Downside, we met Julian's alternate and she (seriously? She? What the fuck does that say about Julian's mind?) rides a fuckhuge wyvern that might not be a wyvern, so I need to learn how to use wyvernslayers.

So, in terms of plot derailment, I give this two Hendersons. It has been a good day!

Naturally, knowing karma, it's all downhill from here.

* * *

A/N: So...that E3, huh? Sony wins, right? Microsoft loses, right? Nintendo's just still kinda around and isn't getting worse or better, right?  
Oh, what am I saying, I'm still going to make myself bankrupt in order to get all of them because I'm a sucker for Halo.

For the confused: Old Man Henderson is a character from a Call of Cthulhu RPG campaign who managed to 'win' Call of Cthulhu by derailing his DM's campaign and _killing a __**Great Old One**_. This is a big deal. You can find it online, on 1d4chan (A /tg/ archive. NSFW in places, but that article is and it's a hilarious read). For those of you calling the 'Lucien can read Cameron's mind' thing out in that one chapter because of a one-liner I threw in there, good job. Anyway, I'll be back with the third part of this little mini-arc that was meant to be one chapter but it was taking too fucking long by the end of the week, and then we've got the battle with Mustafa, a brief 1 or 2 chapter break...and then the final battle. Yesh.


	23. Chapter Twenty-Two (Cam XXII)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-Two – A Quiet March**

"Hey, Cameron, the rain followed you across dimensions."

"Julian? Kindly shut the fuck up."

So, only a half-hour into the march all the way to the point where we'd meet up with Olivia's caravan and get the hell out of this country, Julian woke up. It then proceeded to start raining, and he brought up one of my family in-jokes. Leaving me, Anna and Julian in the rearguard, with Kylar in the center of the column to heal his wing. Sumia and Cordelia had a look at it, apparently it was actually serious and Kylar was being a tough guy while talking to Panne.

We're Scottish, we move to Germany, it rains every summer. We move to France, it rains every summer. We move to Canada, it only stops raining when it's snowing.

Every time we comment on it we get a shrug and 'it's never happened before'. Honestly, I hate this stuff. It gets worse – the downpour must be helping the Plegians put out that fire Lucien started. Frederick's still humming happily to himself, and it's starting to get incredibly creepy. Well, more so than it was to start with.

"Still, you have to admit-"

"Julian, if the rain had followed me I'd declare myself the fucking rain god and travel the world bringing hope to all those stricken by drought." I sighed. "It's just an odd coincidence. It's meant to rain in this chapter, remember?"

"Yeah, I know." Julian shrugged. "That was meant to be for dramatic effect, though. Now it's just irritating."

Anna rolled her eyes and kept walking. "Maybe you two shouldn't talk so loudly about your big secret?"

"Yes, dear." I close my eyes and follow her, groaning as my poor abused ankles were wrenched out of the mud with extreme force. Julian seemed to be having difficulty walking full stop, but insisted on doing so anyway. "So, what do you want to talk about?"

Anna opened her mouth, but Julian cut her off. "You're not discussing sweet nothings, wedding plans, or anything of the sort while I'm here."

Anna sighed, and perked up again. Julian groaned.

"That means no merchant gossip too." He said, gritting his teeth. "Gods, there's no way in hell I'm going to be living with you two."

"Good." Anna smirked. "I wouldn't want you to lose out on your sleep."

Help.

Me.

"That's a mental image I certainly didn't need to be treated to." Julian said offhandedly, scrunching his face. "Now, if you don't mind I'll go back to panicking about the fact that my alternate rides a fuckoff huge wyvern, while he shoots crossbow bolts at me."

"She." I correct offhandedly. Julian stops in his tracks for a second, glancing at me.

"Well, that's...not that surprising." He sighed, walking up to me. I glanced at him, confused.

"What d'you mean?"

"Oh, come on." He groused. "Don't make me say it."

"You hate women?" I hazarded a guess. Julian snorted.

"Yes, Cameron, I hate women. I am an oppressing sexist bastard who believes all women should be used explicitly for breeding and making men sandwiches in the kitchen." He snarked. "Use your fucking brain."

"Seriously, pal, I have no idea." I shrugged. "Nothing seems off about you to me."

"I'm gay, you colossal blockhead." He said flatly.

"And?" I shrugged. "I knew that bit, or don't you remember when you and Craig decided to go-"

"Please do not finish that sentence in the company of others." He groaned. "Please, that was a huge mistake."

"I fail to see how this connects to anything." I shrug. Julian rolls his eyes.

"My parents are _how _conservative?"

"Well, the one time I met them they were screaming about your return home two hours later than you said you would, so...greatly?"

"Yes. I'm a gay guy with ultra-conservative parents. Do you see how this _might _manifest as an insecurity for my sexuality?" He snarked.

"Well, that's your alternate explained." I shrugged. "No big deal."

"Yeah, yeah." Julian sighed, glancing at Anna. "...please don't tell anyone else about this yet."

"It'll cost you." She said flatly.

"ANNA!" is she serious? "MY FRIEND'S PERSONAL CRISIS IS _NOT _A MONEYMAKING OPPORTUNITY!"

"...job killing socialist." She sighed, kicking a rock. "Fine, I won't tell anyone."

"It's a bloody good job you're marrying her." Julian smirked. "Otherwise half the continent would be bankrupt in a few years, and the other half would belong to her."

"I'll take that as a compliment." Anna grinned. Then the rain got harder, and we all became more depressed.

"After this, they shouldn't even bother with giving me a medal." Julian sighed. "I'd be perfectly happy with a long bath and a large drink."

"How long and how large?" I smirk. "I'll take your medals if you don't want them."

"...you know what? You can have them, just make sure you fill a bathtub with wine and we'll go from there."

* * *

This is surprising.

"I thought intelligence placed an army here." Frederick frowned. "What reason could they have to leave?"

Robin glanced at the map, plucking one of his models from it. "Whatever reason it is, I guess there's no need to fight here. Basilio, the caravan should be nearby, yes?"

Basilio nodded, frowning. "Hopefully Flavia and her men have made it back across the border by now, but that would-"

"Mean we've got the entire plegian army that isn't trying to put out that fire on us." Chrom sighed, frowning as Frederick gave yet another OOC chuckle at the thought. Emmeryn gave him a reproachful glance that made him resume serious mode. Chuckling Frederick is horrifying.

"Regardless, we should hurry up and get out of here." I sighed. "Preferably to somewhere with less cliffs that I will fall off of."

I may be developing a complex.

"Agreed." Robin nodded, scooping the models and map back into his bag with a haphazard sweep. We all backed off from the rock we'd been using as a table, and glanced back down the hill to where Mustafa's army SHOULD have been. I guess that means we'll be fighting him later somewhere else.

This is not a good sign, that means we have successfully ruined all foresight even for the short-term future. So, I guess it is a good sign to an extent?

Whatever, it just gives me a headache. Also, why am I standing in on these strategy meetings? I'm the lowest of the low, a position I'm quite comfortable with as it means there'll be less chances for me to present myself a plan that ends with me falling off a cliff, as somebody else is doing said plan.

...that sentence doesn't make structural sense at all.

Whatever, I'm just gonna ask. "Hey, what exactly am I doing here?"

"Inventory." Robin sighed. "You might just be Anna's assistant for it, but quite frankly I'd like to make sure she's not ripping us off by having someone else give the reports."

"Oh, she is not _that _bad." I protested, throwing my arms out to the side. MELODRAMATIC!

"Weren't you screaming about how your friend was not a moneymaking opportunity ten minutes ago?" Frederick asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, yes, but...we were kidding! Honest!"

"...we might need to find another quartermaster's assistant, this one's whipped." Robin said with a smirk, standing up. "Right, well, let's get a move on."

"I am not _whipped_!" I protested as they walked away. Oh, wow, even Emmeryn's smirking. "...I am _not_! Robin, if you fall off a cliff, _I'm not catching you_!"

"I'd have a contingency plan anyway." Robin called back over his shoulder, smirking. "Now hurry up before you get left behind."

Assholes. Fine.

* * *

I really shouldn't be surprised that I didn't meet Olivia outside of a passing glance at the top of the caravan. I really, really shouldn't be, but it kinda sucks because I always liked her. Better not mention that around Anna. Still, I'm just standing on top of this cart, looking at desert and...more desert...and it's fucking freezing because deserts make no sense that way.

"So, I understand congratulations are in order."

Oh, hey Gaius. "Hey, what's up?"

"Well, we were going to come up here and tease the crap out of you, but we decided to do it the right way first" He smirked. "We'll humiliate you in public, and support you in private."

"...you guys are assholes." I sigh, turning back. Gaius shrugs, pulling Vaike and Stahl on top of the wagon with me.

"Whatever you say, Lucky." Gaius nodded. Stahl just pulled out a basket of – are those sausages?

"Is that a peace offering?" I ask with a raised eyebrow. Stahl nodded, plucking one out of the basket before I could even get started. Wait, there were five, he took one...now there's three. "Hey, Kellam."

Kellam sighed and slumped down next to me, minus armor. He's a pretty heavily built guy even without that stuff on him, nothing like Kjelle turns out to be for example. "Did you seriously not see me until I took the sausage?"

"Nope." I said cheerfully. "You really should consider a career in spying."

"We've been over this." He sighed, leaning back and staring at the stars. An awkward silence passed before Vaike chuckled.

"So, you're gonna be the test to see if we wanna get married or not."

"Like you guys even could." I shot back with a smirk. Gaius rolled his eyes in response.

"If I put effort towards it I could." He said defensively. "If it doesn't work out for you, that just means it's a bad idea."

"And that I'll be twenty gold richer." Vaike grinned.

"Thank you for your overwhelming support, Vaike." I deadpanned before biting into the sausage. Huh, pork.

"You're welcome." Vaike puffed up, all proud. "Don't worry! If you need help, Teach will be there to-"  
"-make it worse?"

"Oh, come on Lonke-"

The swordsman gave Vaike an irritated glare as he scrambled up on top of the wagon with us. Uh, I really hope it doesn't fall in on itself because that might wake up Anna and probably crush her too.

"It's pronounced Lon'qu." He grumbled. "Remember that."

"You're asking Muscles to remember something." Gaius said with a sigh. "He forgets his own axe ninety percent of the time, remember?"

Lon'qu nodded, a small smirk forming. "Yes, I remember. He may not."

Vaike started protesting – loudly – which made the rest of us start laughing. Unfortunately, we woke up Anna, who was...less than impressed.

"A woman without sleep isn't going to be making any money, you know!" She practically screamed, leaning out of the window on the side. Her hair was all over the place, and oh for crying out loud why is the nightgown so lacy?

Please tell me that's not what Lucina mentions in her mother support, I never needed visuals to accompany that one.

"You don't need any more money." Gaius replied, before a helmet smacked off his head. "Alright, alright, maybe you do if it'll keep you less violent...sheesh."

Even Lon'qu got a chuckle out of that as Anna ducked back inside.

"You know, if we really are his friends," Stahl said with a smirk. "We'd stay out here to keep watch and allow him to spend time with the fiancee."

"Do you really want to be so close to them while they're spending time together?" Gaius replied, grinning.

"I hate you both." I sighed, leaning back and tuning out the rest of the conversation. Lon'qu seemed to be doing something similar, except he was actually standing watch like I was meant to be. "But if you could cover for me, that would be great. I'mma go sleep."

"Sure. Sleep." Gaius said flatly. "Keep it down, will you?"

"Fuck off."

"Save it for the fiancee." He shot back as I clambered off the top of the wagon. That's gonna be hell to deal with for the rest of the march, isn't it?

"Are you sure they qualify as your friends?" Anna said sleepily...and the barrier's still gone, wonderful. Restrain yourself, Cam.

"To a certain degree of friendship." I shrugged, stripping down to smallclothes – UNDERWEAR christ I'm going to keep some terms from home – and slipping under the covers.

"Hm. Well, g'night."

"Night, Anna."

* * *

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!"

You know, drifting off to sleep and then finding yourself in the blue room with a very pissed off old man is not exactly a pleasant situation.

"NO, SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE _FUCK _MAN!" The Old Man ranted. You know what, let's just call him Tom.

"I'm calling you Tom now."

"...ARE YOU FUCKING HIGH?!" Wow, I've gotten him really angry. "YOU JUST RUINED YOUR ONE BIG ADVANTAGE, AND YOU'RE NOT PANICKING?!"

"I'm panicking quietly. You should try it." I said brightly. "So...no game tonight?"

I have finally done it. I have rendered a god (maybe?) speechless. He slumped down, rubbed his temples, and stared off into space.

"I knew I should have gone with the dream idea rather than full implementation..." He grumbled. "That way you'd have realized what a colossaly BAD IDEA THIS WAS!"

"It wasn't that bad." I shrugged. "Besides, she might not try to diplomacy Walhart once she hears about what he's been doing - "

"MIGHT IS NOT THE SAME AS KNOWING WHAT _WILL_ HAPPEN!" Tom slammed his hand down onto a table that definitely wasn't there a second ago. Stop showing off your reality warping powers. "ARE YOU COMPLETELY INSANE?!"

"Signs point to yes."

"STOP BEING CHEERFUL!" He pointed at me. Huh, Tom, are you alright? You're kind of shifting shape...wait, what the fuck? You're not an old man right now, more sort of... a red haired peter pan.

"...shit. Gimme a second." He concentrated and eventually returned to the form I'm used to. "Now, where was I? Ah, yes...WHY!?"

"Because it trips up the Alternates, gives the future children more motivation that they can change the future and means we won't have to worry about running a country while on campaign."

Tom opened and closed his mouth a few times, before slumping back in a freshly-summoned chair and rubbing his temples. "You know, the sad part is that's a much better argument than Julian's. He just said 'for the lulz'."

"Sounds like him." I agreed. "Yet it was his idea."  
"That's why this is sad." He grumbled. "Whatever. You know what? Let's just go with this. See what happens. Who knows, you might luck out and have the war finish on the same timeframe anyway."

"She did finish her speech before jumping." I nodded. "That might have been all she needed."

Tom sighed and leaned forward, summoning a table. A very large, scenic table. "So, how do you play this 40k thing of yours? I believe a new rulebook came out recently..."

Oh please be my beloved Eldar...gaming puts life in perspective.

I wonder if I could introduce the fantasy version to Robin...better not, he'd annihilate me and I'd rather be good at one strategy related thing. Casual was a BLESSING, even though I wasn't _bad _at Fire Emblem.

Thracia 776 being the exception, but really, fuck that game. Siege tomes on a fog of war map? Go to hell...please let this not be something I have to fight IRL now.

* * *

A/N: All three of these are shorter, but they were originally intended to be one chapter. That...didn't work from both a workload standpoint (I get motivated easier if I see myself hitting the chapter goal, when there's five different things to do it gets depressing) and a mood standpoint (romance-action-humor in such rapid succession without a break gave my brain whiplash). So, for the end of the month: Regrouping at Regna Ferox, battle with Mustafa, and then the end of the Plegia arc.

Also you should all go read Daydreams and Nightmares by lambentLodestar because we appear to be freakishly updating the same day anyway. STOP UPDATING WITH MORE WORDS THAN ME YOU'RE MAKING ME LOOK BAD.


	24. Chapter Twenty-Three (Cam XXIII)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-Three – Boxed In**

"Well." Robin said, glancing down at the map. "This could've gone better."

"Quite." Chrom grumbled. "Captain Phila, how many did you estimate there were?"

Phila sighed and shook her head. This isn't good. "There wasn't enough time to count. I'd estimate about two hundred men close by, with another three hundred within a day's march."

"What's our strength?" Basilio grunted as he wandered into the badly-lit room, chewing on a piece of...something. Gods, it's been a while since I've eaten.

"Twenty-six shepherds and the local garrison of fifty men." Robin chuckled. "It could be worse, I suppose."

"Worse?" I may be freaking out. "Robin, we're stuck in a border castle you apparently stormed with ten men, with the entire Plegian army on our doorstep and we still don't know what happened to Flavia's division!"

Yeah, so the main Feroxi army has gone missing in action. Hopefully it hasn't been wiped out, although I'm going to stubbornly believe that even if it has been Flavia will still be alive.

"We could be outnumbered ten-to-one instead of something along the lines of seven-to-one." Robin said with a smirk. "Besides, it was _me _storming this castle, not them."

"You cocky bastard." I mutter, before freezing. "Er, excuse my language your highness."

Phila glared at the back of my head while Emmeryn just smiled and nodded. Wow, you look depressed, woman.

"Cocky might be what we need." Basilio grunted. "What information do you need?"

"I need a rundown of supplies – arrows, oil, weapons, armor, but more importantly food and water." Robin sighed. "We might have to resort to a traditional siege and wait them out."

"We've got a working well, but I'd suggest stocking up on water in case they poison the underground stream or something." I tapped my fingers with the pencil I'd taken with me, frowning. "Anna thinks we've got food for maybe two weeks, but we could stretch it to a month and a half with scrict rationing."

"How strict?" Chrom asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Strict as in Basilio might need to go put that leg of salted meat back in the storehouse because that might be friday's meal."

Basilio glanced at the leg, frowning. "You mean, one each or -"

"For all of us."

"I don't think I like the traditional siege." He grunted, ripping another chunk out. "What's the other plan?"

"I'm sure I can come up with something." Robin shrugged. "Whatever I do, we can't do it until the full five hundred are outside, or we'll be cut down by the stragglers."

"Great. We're stuck here for a few days before we can even do anything." I sighed, leaning back. "Do you want us to start rationing, or-"  
"I'd suggest against it." Robin said bluntly. "We're going to need to keep morale up. Don't let anyone gorge themselves, but don't restrict how much they can take either. Start filling barrels of water, too."

"Got it. I'll go check the weapons inventory." I nodded, turning to leave. "Good luck, genius."

"Yeah, yeah..." Robin chuckled as I left. "I'm sure it'll be better than anything you could come up with."

Arrogant prick.

* * *

"Oh gods, you found a violin."

The one sentence literally filled up all my thoughts on this matter. Nothing good could come out of this.

"Oh, don't be like that Cammie boy!" Julian grinned. "I'm good at string instruments, remember?"

"I remember you endlessly tormenting me. C'est tout." I said bluntly as I pushed past him into the courtyard. Gotta check the walls. He blew an exasperated sigh and followed me.

"Look, if this is still about playing Rains of Castamere after closing the doors and turning the lights off-"

"YOU DON'T DO THAT TO A PERSON!" I'm ashamed to admit that did actually terrify me for a second. "SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE HELL WAS WRONG WITH YOU?!"

"I got bored." He smirked. "It could have been worse."

"I feel like I'm missing something here." Frederick said from up the stairs as we reached the top.  
"Long story short, that's the song that apparently played at a fictional character's wedding before they all got slaughtered." I shrugged. "No big deal."

"You must have been told some very strange stories." Frederick said impassively before turning back to face the guys surrounding our castle. That's...a lot of guys. Read enough epic fantasy, and you actually forget that five hundred people is actually a pretty significant amount of troops. Julian let out a low whistle as he glanced out over the edge.

"So, does Fearless Leader have a plan?"

"Fearless Leader doesn't think, Julian." I said condescendingly. "Great Genius makes the plan. Fearless Leader is a walking morale bonus."

"You do realize I'm standing right here?" Frederick said with a groan. I just shrug and turn to walk the rest of the walls.

"We realize, Frederick. Don't worry, it's just a little joking."

"True, though." Julian added helpfully.

Mayhap we should run before the knight attempts to kill us. By run I mean march slowly around the walls and check on everyone, giving them their water ration – oh.

"You forgot the water rations inside, didn't you?"

"Julian, shut up." I grumbled, dashing down the stairs and grabbing the bag from inside the door. I must have dropped it when I saw him with the violin. The cocky git's standing there as I make my way back up, a little winded from the mad dash – look, it was stairs and through snow, okay? - and started playing the Rocky theme.

"I hate you." I sighed, walking past him. I left him doubled over and laughing next to Frederick, and finally started the rounds. First stop was a bunch of Feroxi knights, who were bantering amongst themselves and just took the skins themselves.

Fine, assholes. I could probably wipe the floor with you, but I won't because quite frankly we need the ablative shielding – I MEAN MEN. Geez, stop thinking less of others already. They could be elites.

Probably not, but it's a possibility!

Second stop, it's Gaius and sitting underneath a parasol (Christ, it's not that much snow) is..._her_.

"Afternoon, Gaius. Lovely day to be completely surrounded and kinda doomed, isn't it?" I said cheerfully, tossing him his drink. The thief just stared at me, rubbing the side of his head and mouthing two words.

_Kill. Me._

"Hmph. Such a common drink. Do you not have any tea?" Maribelle said, crinkling her nose.

"Yeah, after the last time Mari, I'm thinking...no. I don't. Make it your bloody self." I said bluntly, deliberatly tossing it a little too high. She blinked as it flew over her head – did you _really _expect me to hand it to you? - and then scowled.

"I assume you're going to retrieve that for me?" She kind of...hissed? Sounded feline.

"I've got a ton more stops to make first, Mari. Grab it yourself." I shrugged, leaving with haste as she began to tremble slightly with rage.

You can tell because it's making her parasol shake. "Do not call me MARI!"

"Whatever." I wave over my shoulder and keep walking. She appears to have gone into a huge rant against me in Gaius' direction, something I'll have to check on later because shipping.

I can still root for it.

Alright, third and fourth stop, more people I don't know...fifth out of seventh stop, it's Ricken, Nowi and Donnel. Not talked to you guys in...well, not for a while in the guy's case, never in Nowi's. I plan to keep it that way, she's obscenly annoying – where did she go?

_Why is my bag heavier?_

"GEDDOUT!" I yelled, grabbing her by the...straps? Gods, wear some clothes, you look six. I don't care if you are secretly a thousand years old, at least Chibi-Tiki wore an actual dress.

"Aw, cmmn." She mumbled from around the waterskin in her mouth. "ust wnted to ook."

I plucked it out of her mouth and groaned, keeping her suspended in the air. You know, she only weighs slightly more than my cat. Guess that's what being small and having a different bone strucuture does to you.

"Nowi, there's a saying where I come from." I sigh. "Act your age, not your shoe size."

Nowi frowned. "If I acted a thousand, wouldn't I be dead?"

...

Point.

"Whatever." I snapped, dropping her the half-foot down to the ground and giving her a waterskin. "Just refrain from climbing in my bags, would you?"

"'kay!" She grinned, before dashing off to do – something. Okay, so she WASN'T on watch duty. Dumbstruck, I turned to the two younger guys with my jaw dangling.

"How do you put _up _with her?" I asked. Donnel and Ricken glanced at each other, and shrugged.

"She's not so bad." Donnel said quietly, blushing. Oh, we're going with that pairing huh? Fine, at least it's not creepy. Ricken glanced at the other young shepherd – did they have supports? I don't think so. They probably should have, to be honest – and sighed.

"She's like a natural disaster." He pouted. "Hurricane Nowi – here one second, messes with everything, gone again the next."

"That is an incredibly apt description." I nodded, handing over their waterskins. Down to the last couple, so that's the last stop then. "Anyway, I've got to finish with these. Talk to you later, guys."

The waved me off as I headed to the last sentry before I'd gone full circle. This has taken me, what, twenty minutes total? Not exactly a very large castle. Guess that explains the overlarge basement, and why all the beds are in the basement...I hope that doesn't extend out from under the walls. Unless it does and that's part of Robin's plan.

That would be _genius_.

Alright, last sentry...just Cordelia?

"I thought they were meant to double up on these." I said casually as I reached her. Cordelia gave me a small smile and took the waterskin from the bag.

"Vaike forgot his axe, and now he's probably lost." She chuckled.

"Yeah, that sounds like Vaike." I grinned, leaning against the wall. "Want some company?"

Cordelia glanced at me briefly, before "Sigh."

Oh, come ON, you're just saying 'sigh'.

"Sigh?" I raised my eyebrow. "...why would you even say that?"

Cordelia flushed slightly, standing straight. "Was that out loud?"

"Yup." I grinned. "Penny for your thoughts?"

Cordelia sighed – properly this time – before turning and staring out over the courtyard. "Do you see them?"

"Hm?" I glanced down and saw – oh. OH. Sumia and Chrom are wandering around talking to each other. "Ah. Love trouble?" I grimaced. I'd hoped to avoid this conversation entirely.

Cordelia chuckled bitterly, sinking down a little. "Yes. Curious, isn't it? You spend your entire life pining over someone, and then your best friend comes along and takes it instead."

This is going to cause _issues_, isn't it. "Cordelia, I'm pretty sure she doesn't know about -"

"How could she not?" Cordelia laugh-cried (That's not a word, but how the hell else am I meant to categorize that sound). "I'm convinced the only person who doesn't know is the _captain_."

Oh, I have to deal with _this _side of the issue, do I?

"Cordelia, you're going to have to talk to them. Both of them." I said bluntly. "I'm gonna be honest, I'm not sure if you've got a chance. But you've gotta get something resembling closure at least."

Cordelia glanced down, took a swig from her waterskin and sighed – I've heard far too many sighs in the last few seconds – and picked up her lance. Wait, is she going to – no. Nooo. No.

She _wouldn't._

"I suppose I do." She smiled. "Would you mind covering for me?"

Are you _drunk?_

"Uh, sure, I guess-" I started, but she was already halfway down the stairs. I casually sniffed my own waterskin – yup, that's not alcoholic. Seriously, Cordelia's not a Lucina parent, not to mention this is horribly out of character.. She's probably just going to get rejected.

"What have you unleashed?" A horrified Julian asked from my shoulder. I glanced at him and shrugged, honestly confused.

"Hopefully not a time paradox." I said, getting up to my feet. "Hopefully, just a heartbroken Cordelia."

"That's a pretty crappy thing to hope for, Cam." Julian informed me, before shuddering. "Ah, well. We should check with the old man."

"What, if this is a thing or not?" I grumbled. "For all I know, I could have just made it so that Lucina was never born."

"Unless you had a similar conversation when you were crippled. Hell, maybe someone else gave the speech instead." He shrugged. "Besides, let's just watch and see."

It's not like I've got any other choice here, mate. I sighed and glanced up at the sky – sun was starting to set.

"Yeah, I guess we will mate."

* * *

A/N: Duhn duhn duhn.

There's no motivator like a lambentLodestar taunting motivator. This would be longer, but I'm actually not feeling too great right now. Definetly only a cold, should be up and running again in a brief amount of time.


	25. Chapter Twenty-Four (Cam XXIV)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-Four – Cunning Plans, Giant Birds and Odd Discussions**

This explains some things. Standing at the bottom of the gate, General Mustafa glanced up at myself, Chrom and Phila. His attendant was waving a white flag.

"Fighters of the alliance!" He bellowed. "You are facing superior numbers and cannot hope to prevail. If you surrender, handing over the exalt and the Fire Emblem, we will allow you all to leave. If any individual soldiers wish to surrender themselves now, they will be treated kindly. You have half an hour to reply."

Chrom glanced around the walls, made sure nobody wanted to surrender themselves – they didn't, no surprises there – before turning back.

"There's no need for the half hour, General." He said. "We shall not agree to those terms. We do, however, have an alternate offer."

"I'm listening." Mustafa grunted.

"Soldiers of Plegia, you are facing superior _soldiers _and cannot hope to prevail. If you surrender, we will take your weapons and place you in protective custody until the end of the war. You have half an hour to comply." Chrom, that is the single most trolling reply you have said...not to mention I think I've read that before somewhere. Reality and fiction seems to cross over a lot.

Mustafa stood there dumbstruck for a few seconds before letting out a laugh. "Ha! I like you, Prince. I'm afraid I cannot accept those terms, although I'm loathe to kill you now."

"That's a shame." Chrom deadpanned. "I'm loathe to die."

Did he seriously just quote the _Princess Bride_?! Mustafa laughed it off and waved his hand.

"Well said, Prince! I'll see you on the battlefield!"

With that, the general turned and left. Phila gave Chrom a disapproving glance.

"That was poorly done, your highness." She said reproachfully. I sighed and shook my head.

"Commander, I can't help but think you don't get how career soldiers work." I grinned. "It's a whole different class than knights – they'd rather drop the formality for some banter and good intentions."

Chrom nodded in agreement. "I picked up that much from interactions with you and Vaike." He grinned, before sighing. "It's a shame, he seemed like a good man."

"That's war for you, Captain. Sometimes, good people are just on the wrong side." I shrugged, turning to leave.

And then Hurricane Nowi struck once again.

"Hey! Wotcha doing?!" She asked, dangling off of the flagpole right in front of Phila's face, making her give out a very un-knightly shriek before collecting herself.

"We are dealing with very serious matters, child."

Nowi puffed out her cheeks and unhooked her foot from the ropes, dropping the five feet and landing like a cat on her feet. "Child? I'm at least a hundred times your age."

Phila glanced at Chrom, who sighed. "She's a manakete."

"Oh...oh!" Phila straightened up immediately, flushing. "My apologies, madam!"

Nowi grinned. "Oh, respect...nice. Why don't you all treat me like that?"

"Because age doesn't equal respect, Nowi." I grumbled. "What do you want?"

Nowi frowned and tapped her chin. "I...think Robin sent me to tell you he wanted to see you?"

"Thank you for the message." Chrom nodded. "Now, was there anything else?"

"Um..." Her face scrunched up in concentration as she tried to remember. "...I need to find Donnel's rock? No, I did that yesterday...uh...oh, right! I have to find bald guy too!"

"You mean Basilio?" I ask after a second. Nowi nodded.

"Yep! Robin wants to see him too! NOWI AWAY!"

With that she bolted off the wall and ran on top of the snow. Wait, why isn't she sinking into it?

Whatever. Phila stood there for a few seconds, shaking.

"What...just...happened?" She asked eventually. Chrom shrugged.

"You get used to it. Right, Robin should still be in the war room, right?"

* * *

"I've got a cunning plan." Robin grinned. Okay, you see, you'd _think_ that is reassuring, but all I can remember whenever you say that specific sentence is Baldrick from Blackadder, and none of his plans make sense or work. Okay, some of them work, but – STAY ON TARGET. "And I'm sure you're all dying to hear it."

"We're trembling with anticipation." I deadpanned. "Get on with it."

Robin glanced at me. "You're going to hate me."

"I hate you already." I smirked. "I hate everybody to some degree or another. That's kind of my thing."

"You must be an absolute dream to have at parties." Robin snarked before turning back to the map. This time, it's me, Chrom and Basilio in the room, no-one else. I'm not sure why. "I found a series of tunnels leading out beneath the walls. They open up in the hills nearby. Chrom is going to lead a force to sortie out through these tunnels, harass the enemy rear, and then retreat in a blatantly obvious fashion that will reveal the tunnels. All of them."

"Thereby giving them an easy access to the castle?" What? "Robin, I'm beginning to think Frederick was on to something and you work for Plegia."

Robin snorted. "The tunnels will be rigged to collapse. I've walked down some of them, and marked the load-bearing supports. Cameron will be spending the next few hours setting up a chain of ropes that, when pulled, will bring the tunnels – and several dozen tonnes of earth – down on the enemy forces. They will either be pursuing Chrom – please wait until we're certain he's back, along with our own men, we don't want to be known for friendly fire-"

Heh, keyboard shortcut for teamkills. Control-f-u.

"-or will assemble a proper army, wait until we'd believe they hadn't pursued us, and send their men down the tunnels. Either way, we should be able to rid them of almost two hundred men that way. Chrom's raid should drop them by another ten or twenty. At this point-" Robin plucked a model up from the map and studied it for a second. "-Phila should have returned with her pegasus knights from that other castle. She will begin an aerial assault from the rear, pushing them into further disarray, before disengaging and retreating inside the fortress to man the walls, reinforcing us with another twenty skilled fighters. At this point, we should be able to hold this fort against the inevitable counter-attack from the surviving general, especially considering that the enemy forces will be demoralized as well as greatly reduced. Any questions?"

Yes, how the hell did you come up with this?

"Why Chrom?" I asked bluntly. "Why not me, you, or Basilio?"

Robin tapped the other three miniatures thoughtfully. "Here's the thing – I'm going to need Basilio's experience if they attack over the walls if they suspect a trap, I'm going to need to be here to replan if necessary, you aren't famous enough, and they hate Ylisse. Sending out a member of Ylissean royalty should get their attention."

"Fair enough." I shrug. "Next stupid question: What makes you so sure they'll counter-attack after this instead of resorting to conventional siege, with us now having twenty more mouths to feed?"

"That's entirely a hunch." Robin shrugged. "If it does turn into a conventional siege, that's where plan b comes into play."  
"What's plan b?" Chrom asked after a few seconds of silence. Robin grinned and glanced up.

"Hope that Flavia shows up in time to save all of us." He said conversationally. "Plan c – which would be plan b if it didn't take so long do to – would be to collapse the walls, have everybody retreat to the basements, collapse the fort, and then escape through the one tunnel we're not collapsing."

"...holy crap." I whistled. "You really thought of everything."

Robin chuckled. "I try my best." He scooped the map up and glanced around. "Are there any problems?"

Chrom just stood there, looking awkward. "...other than personal ones? No, not really."

Basilio let out a hearty laugh, slapped Chrom on the back and walked out of the room. "Har! Good luck!"

We were left there for several awkward moments before Chrom turned to me, a bit of desperation in his eyes. "Cameron, you're married, you must know what you're doing. Help."

"Chrom, Anna did all the work in this relationship." I said, raising my hands before relenting at the look of sheer panic he was giving me. "...er, what exactly is the problem?"

"Cordelia came out of nowhere and said she was in love with me." Chrom said bluntly. "She then ran off crying."

...oh, _come on_.

"Wait, this was new to you?" Robin blinked. "Chrom, the entire army knew. Literally! We all thought you just didn't want to let her down!"

"...how long has this been going on?" Chrom asked, dawning horror in his eyes.

"I'd estimate even before you caught her falling, although that didn't help matters." I groaned, rubbing my temples. "...dear lord. I think it's been a few years?"

"That's what Frederick told me." Robin shrugged. Chrom's eyes widened even more – at some point your eyeballs will just fall out of their sockets if you keep this up.

...what am I, Henry? That was morbid.

"FREDERICK knew and he never told me?"

"...it was really obvious." I said defensively. "Like, we honestly had no clue you didn't know."

Chrom slumped backwards, and would have collapsed to the floor if Robin hadn't shoved a chair behind him as soon as the conversation had started. That...is a scary level of micromanagement and planning, my friend.

"Gods, how do I deal with this." He moaned. I groaned and sat down in another chair, glaring at Robin as he attempted to leave.

"Oh no, you are NOT leaving me _alone _to deal with _your_ best friend." I growled. Robin sighed, turned around, and grudgingly sat back down.

"I'm not exactly experienced in this either." Robin said defensively. "He's got a point – you are the only one in a secure relationship type...thing."

That's incredibly sad.

"Wonderful." I sighed. "Okay, Chrom, first things first – what exactly is going on between you and Sumia?"

Chrom's head bolted up. "...what has that got to do with anything?"

"Oh, gods." I grumbled. "Okay, Chrom, yes or no questions from now on: Do you have a romantic interest in Sumia?"

"No."

...what? "Then how come you spend so much time in her company?" I asked politely. Keep frosty, Cameron.

"She, ah...keeps asking me about Frederick." He mumbled, embarrassed. "The last time she tried to approach him she was exposed to the Fanatical Fitness Hour."

"...the hell is Fanatical Fitness Hour?" I ask. I think I remember it coming up in the supports, but – okay, they're both shivering in fear.

"So many crunches." Robin muttered under his breath. "So little _time_..."

"The pull-up bars...good gods, the pull-up bars..." Chrom added.

"Okay, so Frederick's Fanatical Fitness Hour is a good reason to avoid directly contacting him?" This was met with many nods. "Okay. So, what, Sumia wants to make a move on Frederick or..?"

"Basically, yes. She, ah, said as much to my face." Chrom muttered, still flushing. "She genuinely did just want to help with the pies, I think she was trying to boost her own confidence." Well, she does have those self-confidence issues, so I can see why she'd want to prove to herself she can do things.

"Wonderful. Okay, so Sumia's not going after you, you're not going after Sumia...I don't believe you have any interest in anyone else?"

Chrom sat there looking thoughtful for a second. "...I've never thought about it. I always figured I'd just find someone eventually."

"Okay." I sighed. "Do I _really _need to continue with this train of thought?"

Both of them just sat there and looked at me, mystified. "...how am _I _the one who knows about girls." I said under my breath, slumping even further in the chair and rubbing my nose. "Okay, look, it's simple – you don't have any interests in anyone that you know of because you, Fearless Leader, appear to just lack a sex drive in general-"

I'd like to note neither of them disagreed with me on that point.

"-while she has an interest in you that is quite literally destroying her. For god's sake, take her out to dinner or something. If it doesn't work out, she'll be able to move on, if it does, hey, good job, you found a girlfriend. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go rig some tunnels to collapse."

That has to have been the single most awkward conversation that I have ever had and probably ever will have.

* * *

"How's it looking?" I called up the tunnel, wiping away sweat from my head. Julian shook his head – I think – before realizing I couldn't see him that far down the tunnels and settled for waving his torch.

"It's, ah, pretty waterlogged. Guess all the melted snow must have come down here." He yelled back. "I'm gonna say we need to put down some planks to walk on, or they're never going to be able to run back fast enough."

"Good call, I'll see if I can find any. Keep chopping!"

"Yah, yah..." Julian grumbled. Robin had identified which of the supports actually held the tunnels up the most, and had ordered us to cut down the rest. Then we should only need to pull maybe five or six ropes a tunnel to get the rest.

When asked what we should do if we made a tunnel collapse prematurely, he merely suggested we run. Asshat.

Anyway, here's the storage room. "Hey, Anna."  
"Robin working you to death?" She asked, curled up in the corner and polishing a coin.

"Eh, something like that. Have we got any planks or anything?"

"Over in that corner." She jerked her thumb towards the other side of the room. "I think they were meant to be used for making temporary shelters or something."

"We just need planks." I sighed, grabbing the first stack – about twenty two-by-fours. Oof, that's heavy.

"You're going to have to pay for that." She smirked as I tried to leave. Groaning, I turned to face her.

"Seriously?"

"Mm-hmm. I'd say a kiss a bundle would do it, right?"

"Tempting, but I'm gonna have to put it on credit for now. Busy." I smirked. Anna rolled her eyes and shoved me out of the room.

"Fine by me, I charge high interest."

Walking back, walking back, walking baack – hel_lo_. "Why's everyone running, Gaius?"

The thief popped some kind of hard candy into his mouth before answering. "Long story short, Julian and Vaike are sparring and making it kind of a big deal."

"That sounds interesting." A thought hits me. "Hey...how much would I have to pay you to put these down for me? Just set a trail through the tunnels, so they can step on them without sinking."

Gaius narrowed his eyes. "...why?"

"So I can go watch my best friend get some sense clobbered into him." I'm beginning to just beg here. "Please?"

Gaius sighed. "Alright, fine. I'll do it, but you owe me a cake or something the next time we hit a town."

"Got it." I grinned. "Alright, thanks mate!"

"Sure." Gaius grumbled as I shoved the planks into his arms and dashed up after the rest of them. Alright – wow it's nippy up here. I guess all those torches down below must have helped with the heat. Julian and Vaike are slowly circling each other, wooden axes in their hands – well, Vaike's got a double-bladed axe like the one he usually uses, while Julian's got that single-edged poleaxe he likes to use, but they're still axes. Wonder who's going to make the first move?

"Come on, then!" Vaike grinned. "Come ta teach!"

"I'm not going to negate my reach advantage, Vaike." Julian said calmly, presenting the poleaxe kind of like a spear. Hey, I only just noticed it's got a spike on the end. Dual usage weapon? Not a bad idea. It's basically a lance – proper cavalry lance not Fire Emblem lance – with a large sharp piece of metal on the side, and considering he does most of his fighting from a mount the reach makes sense. "Why don't you make the first move?"

Vaike did so. Okay, so he's actually fast. Like, really fast. Maybe not Lon'qu fast, but he's not a slow bruiser either. Julian whipped out with his poleaxe, scything through the air in front of him, before taking a step back and bringing the blade part closer to his body. Vaike ahd rolled under the swing – yeesh, bare skin on snow, that must have hurt to some degree – before lashing out at Julian's knees, forcing him to block with the blunt end of the poleaxe.  
Vaike then promptly proved my theory that smaller weapons just have a higher attack speed by default even in real life by slamming Julian in the side of his head, knocking him down. Ouch.

"Ha! Toldya Teach was better! You could learn something!"

"You could as well, Vaike." Julian grinned as he accepted the hand and let himself get pulled up. "When have I ever fought alone?"

Vaike's face at this moment is the perfect combination of confusion, dawning comprehension and no small amount of horror. Pity we only got to see it for about one second before a 1000 pound griffon landed on him, pinning him to the ground with his talons.

"SKREE!"

I...can't hold in the laughter. Julian grinned as he rubbed Kylar's beak.

"That, Vaike, is why I don't need lessons on how to fight on the ground." He patted Kylar's neck to make him get off. "Good to see you back to strength, bird."

"Skree!" Kylar flapped both of his wings, the bandages on his left one gone. Good to see.

"Alright, everyone, show's over, we've got work to do." I shouted, clapping my hands. "Julian, you were meant to be doing things."

"Vaike started it!" He almost pouted. Not the best argument to use, Julian.

"I don't care who started it, I'll finish it. Kylar will help."

Kylar nodded sagely at this point – can he understand humans or something? Maybe I'll ask Panne. - making Julian scowl.

"Traitor. Fine. Come on, Vaike, make yourself useful and lend me some of that muscle."

The two wandered off, hopefully to actually do what I told them to. Grinning, I turned to leave myself. I've got several more tunnels to make walkways in, after all.

* * *

I don't want to see an underground tunnel ever again. We'd been working for almost twelve hours before Robin confirmed everything was good, announced we'd do it tomorrow, and told everyone to get some sleep.

Which, for me, means waking up in the Blue Room.

"You know, you can't just leave a guy for three weeks and then start pestering him every night again." I grumble. Tom grunted and just stayed on the couch he'd summoned, playing some video game.

"Your world has so many magnificent inventions." He grinned. "It almost makes up for the lack of magic."

"I figured at some point we'd reach the Arthur C Clarke quote, and it wouldn't matter." I shrugged. "What is it this time?"

"Oh, nothing, just thought I'd lay some of your fears to rest." He said conversationally. "With the whole Cordelia-Chrom thing."

"Yeah, I dun goofed on that I think." I grumbled and sat down at the other end of the sofa. Tom snapped his fingers and vanished the home cinema setup.

"Actually, you didn't. Lucina's entire existence – all of the children – is a variation of a stable time loop. The minute Chrom marries someone else, or any pairing changes to be honest, the future alters itself slightly to accommodate. So, the children are the same, but the hair color and some family relationships change."

"That's...incredibly convenient." I said after a few seconds. "Like, scarily so." It also explains why the father/child and sibling conversations are generic, actually, if it's just reality warping slightly to accommodate minor changes...huh. Never thought of it that way.

"Hey, I don't write the rules of this universe, that's Old Hubba's job." Tom shrugged. "I'm just an intern."

"...so Old Hubba is literally god." I said after a few seconds. Tom blinked.

"Not as such. Think of it more as a Q Continuum thing, with there being a species so far above the others they can warp things." He said after a few seconds. "Gods are above even them."

"So...you're being groomed to become a Q?" I said after a few seconds. Tom shrugged and cracked open some soft drink before passing it to me – is this Irn Bru?

Oh it is. Sweet taste of home, how I have missed you.

"I started as a prisoner because I was interfering too much, but Hubba liked me and decided to put me in charge of his pet universe." He shrugged. "Since I was from there, he figured I could mess around with it instead while he went off and became a creepy old pervert."

"...who the hell are you?" I ask after a few seconds. Tom tapped the side of his nose and winked.

"Now, now, I already answered a question this dream. Shuddup and enjoy your drink."

"I didn't ask a question!" I protested. Tom grinned. "...I did not! You told me that of your own free will!"

"You _wanted _to ask that question, though." He said conversationally.

"Well, yes, but...I didn't." He just kept grinning smugly at me. "...I DIDN'T!"

"That's how this place works, kid, get used to it." Tom banished his empty can and stood up. "Good luck with the fight. Might want to finish that before I banish you."

Gulping down the last bit, I resist the urge to throw the can at his head. "Whatever. I'm going to ask that question next time."

"There's always going to be something more urgent, I can promise that." Tom smirked. "Bye."

* * *

"Don't pull those ropes until we're all back." Chrom said seriously as he finished checking Falchion's edge. The strike force he was taking with him consisted of all the 'veteran' shepherds – Him, Frederick, Stahl, Sully, Miriel and Kellam. A second strike team led by Lon'qu and consisting of a selection of the local guard was going to leave through a different tunnel. Then, they'd escape down a different tunnel then they'd come out of to make sure the enemy knew about all four tunnels we'd rigged.

Plan was good, it just needed to work.

"I don't plan to, captain." I grinned. "Don't want to deal with Lissa if I accidentally bury you or Lon'qu."

"Hrm." The swordsman grunted, sliding his killing edge into one of his sheaths before checking his second sword. Basically he got his hands on a swordmaster rig, so...I guess you could say he's promoted? "I'd imagine she'd make a lot of noise."

"Gods, I don't want to know." Chrom shuddered. "Alright, if anyone wants to back out now's the time."

As suspected, nobody did. Chrom grinned.

"Alright, let's get moving then!"

They headed down the badly lit tunnels, and after a minute we couldn't see them anymore. Well, time to sit here and just...wait, I guess.

So much _fun_.

* * *

A/N: Actual skype conversation with lambentLodestar from earlier today:

[3:10:58 PM] Cameron: 3500 words now, finally hit my intended target for a chapter.

[3:11:15 PM] Lamby: Halfway done, at least this is a really easy chapter to write

[3:11:22 PM] Lamby: and it's totally fucking badass, too

[3:12:11 PM] Cameron: Eh, I'll call this done and do the action sequence next chapter. I've got other things to write as well.

[3:12:18 PM] Lamby: cheater

[3:14:16 PM] Cameron: ...I'm still going to wait until you post your next one to post this. Just to piss you off.

[3:14:29 PM] Lamby: Asshat.

Fanfic friends are the best motivators. Also, I might be a horrible person. Jury's still out on that one.


	26. Chapter Twenty-Five (Cam XXV)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-Five – Collapse/Clash**

* * *

"Well." Gaius grumbled as he bit into a random pastry that he'd stolen from the kitchens earlier. "Do you ever get the feeling that we're missing out on something ludicrously awesome?"

"You mean the raid?" I shrug. "Eh, I'd like it if we could at least be on the walls and watch from there, but we've got a job to do."

"True, true." Gaius swallowed the pastry and immediately began rifling through his bag for more. "On the bright side, at least we're safer."

"For the love of god, Gaius." I groaned. "There's rules about saying that kind of thing – NEVER say 'we're safer', 'we lost him' and never, EVER say 'How hard can it be'. All three of those sayings just lead to unnecessary pain."

Gaius rolled his eyes. "Whatever you say, Lucky."

"Just stay frosty." Stay frosty, Mimura. Ah, crap, now I'm depressed. Stupid Battle Royale memories. "They could be back any second."

Gaius tilted his head and glanced down the tunnels. "Yeah, I see 'em. Looks like Lon'qu's party."

"Not Chrom and the rest?" I frowned as the clacking of the floorboards we put down yesterday let even me with my crappy night vision know they were coming. "That's slightly concerning."

"Plan probably changed on the fly. I'll check the other tunnel." Gaius turned and ran across to the team we'd placed at the other tunnel. We'd only brought him down because of his stupid good eyesight, what with being a thief and all. We kept Virion outside in case they tried to do some bullshit with their Wyverns, but then again we've not seen any for a while. Still, doesn't hurt to be careful.

Universe, please take pity on me and just have them having mixed up the tunnels, don't make us go out there to rescue them.

"We're good, they're coming!" Gaius called back. Universe, I owe you one.

"ALRIGHT, EVERYBODY, ROPES!" I yelled, wrapping my hands around one. Everyone else tensed up as well, ready to pull. Lon'qu dived through the hole, panting and covered with small scratches and – okay, he's got an arrow in his shoulder. Oh, gods, it goes all the way through. That's disgusting.

"Right behind us. Is it ready?" He growled, his men clambering out from behind him – he left with five, came back with two. Okay, so not a perfect success.

"What happened?" I asked, tilting my head around the corner. Okay, that's a lot of guys. "Brace!"

"They knew about the tunnels. Just get ready." He hissed as he sank against a wall, clutching his shoulder. That does look really bad.

Okay, they're close. Are Chrom and the others back? Yes, yes they are. Stahl and Sully are moving slower than they should be, and also at an odd angle, so they're probably carrying Kellam – yes, yes they are. Okay, let's hope he's alive. Chrom appeared to do a quick recount to make sure all of them were there before turning around and settling into a fighting stance in front of his tunnel.

"Brace...brace..." I hissed. We need to hit as many of them as possible, and we need to pull at the same time. They're thirty paces away, twenty-five. Twenty. Fifteen. Ten.

"PULL!"

"PULL!" The rest of the room roared in unison, pulling back on their ropes. A bare second of tension and creaking – five paces away now – and then a series of harsh snaps, and we all fell backwards. Then the room got filled with dust, mud, water and none of us could hear anything. I staggered to my feet, rubbing my eyes, and...holy crap, that was effective. How many did we get?

"Did it work?" A moaning Feroxi soldier asked as he rose to his feet, shaking his head.

"Yeah, mate...it worked." I grinned. "Robin's a frigging genius."

Wow, for once a plan didn't go pear-shaped on me. Probably because it wasn't me that came up with it. I need to stop trying to think and let other people do that.

* * *

"I, uh..." Robin rubbed his head awkwardly as he looked out over what used to be a nice rolling field covered in snow and was now a mess of upturned earth and half-buried soldiers. "Might have underestimated what removing the ground from your opponent's feet might do."

"No kidding." I muttered, impressed. "How many did we get?"

"Good question." Robin nodded, narrowing his eyes and looking out, moving his lips silently. "I'd say...average of ten per square meter before, new average of three...we got about three hundred and fifty men with that tactic."

"Holy-" Julian's eyes widened. "Thats, what, 70 percent casualties?"

Robin nodded in confirmation, a little shellshocked by what he'd done. "One blow...one blow, and such damage dealt."

Yeah, Robin, that's nothing compared to the warship one you pull against Valm. Trust me, it's really nothing like it.

I think you take out a few thousand with that, at the very least. Robin's eyes narrowed as he caught some shifting movement towards the front as the enemy forces massed together.

"Their general survived." He said sourly, standing up from his seat. "Man the walls, they'll attack soon. By soon I mean now."

Time to get down from this belltower, then. Julian nodded in agreement and whistled, bringing Kylar up next to us. "Anyone want a lift down?"

"I'll take that offer." I grimace. As much as I hate flying, I'm pretty sure I hate stairs more, especially if I have to fight afterwards. After a few seconds searching the skies, Chrom lets out a slight sigh and accepts Julian's hand up as well.

"Arright, then..."

Thankfully, the flight was short and steady, and not that fast. Possibly because three men was more than Kylar was really meant to carry, but either way I'm not complaining.

Mustafa and his men somehow manged to scavenge a pair of ladders, but Robin saw them too and ordered mass saturation of firepower around them. Javelins and hand axes from the Feroxi garrison bolstered Virion's arrows – the guy is actually a _serious _badass, not gonna lie – and our own magic. I wish I could use magic, that would be useful. So, they're probably not going to be able to scale the walls. What's their plan b?

Also, where is Phila and her pegasus knights? With their numbers reduced so badly, we might actually be able to sortie and win if she would hurry up and get here.

"Yo, Cam." Julian asked after a couple of seconds. "...we did remember to garrison the main gate when we got back, right?"

Oh. _Oh._

"FUCK!" That's where they're going. "ON ME!"

How the hell did we overlook that? Okay, so the main gate is double-layered and basically a death trap if you get caught in the center part, but if they get through we're still outnumbered. Also, we, ah, might have not pulled the secondary portcullis down and just reinforced the main door.  
Chrom blinked as I dashed past him, followed by about six Feroxi warriors who just decided to tag along.

"Why are you-"

Sorry, can't wait to explain! There we are!  
Main gate. They're already breaking in, they must have axes for this or something, kinda like how some shotguns can blow off locks. That's an odd comparison, stop thinking about it that way.

"Julian, get the second gate down, I'll hold them back!"

"That's a _stupid _plan!"

A) That's Robin's line, B) Welcome to my fucking life.

Doing it anyway.

There's stairs, but fuck those they take too long. Let's just jump down – I've jumped off of higher, after all – nice landing, okay. And the gates down, and here come the men.

Evening, Mustafa.

"...you're the one that saved the Exalt." He murmured at the sight of me. Okay, that's like twenty guys behind him. I might have to manipulate his sense of honor. "Did she know you were going to do that?"

"In all honest? No, that was a spur-of-the-moment thing." I shrugged. "I'm pretty sure she intended to die. Wasn't gonna let her do that to her siblings, though."

"Mm." Mustafa nodded casually. "I had a feeling that might have been your motivation. Do you have family?"  
Yes. No. Sort of? "...not anymore." Oh, bugger, the rest of his army's caught onto the plan. The sudden slam behind me at least confirmed they'd dropped the portcullis.

"Ah." Mustafa scowled. "What happened?"

"...It's not possible to see them again, that's all." I said after a few seconds. I really need to sit down and just deal with that at some point.

"Then you know what it would be like to lose your family, don't you pup?" Mustafa grunted, raising his axe. "If I fail here, Gangrel will murder mine."

"If I fail here, your men will kill the closest thing I've got left." I shot back with a glare. You don't get sympathy for dragging my family into this. Mustafa's own eyes softened.

"Sorry, lad. Listen here...Men! If I lose this fight, surrender! That's an order!"

Well...bugger.

"YES, GENERAL!"

"Now, lad...will you offer me the same courtesy?" He growled. "Will your me surrender if you fall?"

"Not my men, not my orders, not going to fall anyway." I smirked, feeling more than a little cocky. "Sorry, but they feel a little too strongly about this war to surrender just 'cause I lost."

"A pity. Do you accept the challenge, however?"

Okay, Cameron, think about this logically. He's a second-tier unit, you're still first-tier and not that good either. Just because Lucien believes you've improved a lot doesn't make you good. Still, you do have the weapon triangle advantage, and this shield _does _make up for a lot...

"If you're honestly going to offer such incredibly one-sided victory conditions, I'd have to be an idiot." I commented, tilting my head to the side. This is going to _suck_.

"CAMERON, THAT'S AN _EVEN MORE_ STUPID PLAN!" Julian yelled from up top.

"What is?"

"Well, y'see Chrom, the _idiot _has agreed to honorable duel with the enemy general, a man who's been fighting for much longer and is probably _much _better at it, because for some reason Cameron has come down with a serious case of _RETARDED_!"

Julian, shut the fuck up, I'm trying to concentrate here.

"I mean good god, why do I even try to be his friend? WHY? What do I get out of it these days? Jesus christ...if he dies, I'm not the one telling Anna, I'm saying it right now."

"Is your friend done?" Mustafa asked with a raised eyebrow.

"NO!" Julian yelled. "I AM _NOT_ DONE VENTING!"

"TOUGH!" I shouted back, rolling my eyes. "I'M GETTING THIS OVER WITH!"

I turned back the the general, sighing. "Sorry about that. So, first blood, or..."

"To the death." Mustafa said, narrowing his eyes. "Or surrender, whichever comes first."

"Very well then." I nodded, settling down into my usual stance – god, I've only just realized how much like the zelda stance it is. That's kinda sad. Also surprising that it actually works, so hey, either way.

"Commence." The general growled, his red axe looking actually kind of terrifying. Then he moved. He's...not that fast, actually. Is he holding back?

Whatever. Block it – OH MY GOD THE STRENGTH. Right, he's a berserker, they've got kind of a monopoly on that stat. Ugh, at least the bone didn't break, but direct blocking is a bad idea apparently. Not to mention I got forced back a few steps through the mud and the snow. Yeah, it's that kind of force. Okay, here comes his second swing – use the shield to bat it aside rather than block.

Blocking is a bad idea. Well, with that much strength even if I'm faster than him I'm forced into a reactive role.

"CAMERON _WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!_"

Oh, shit.

"...Anna, sweetheart, I'm a LITTLE BUSY HERE!" I yelled up at the pissed redhead. Mustafa glanced from me to her a few times.

"Wife?"

"Fiance. Long story."

"Ah." Mustafa nodded sagely. Julian and Cordelia both had to grab onto Anna to prevent her from diving into the gate-slash-temporary arena and probably...either help me or actively try to throttle me. "Now...where were we?"

Oh bugger.

Duck under his next swing, bounce away on the back of your feet. Keep away from the walls, if you get boxed in you're doomed. Here he comes again, deflect with shield – no direct blocks, direct blocks are stupid – and back through his right side to avoid the backswing. Is this an opening? Yes, yes it is. Lash out.

He backs off, but he's got a shallow cut along the side of his gut now. Shoulda worn armor, General. He seems kind of...disappointed? I don't recall him being a death seeker of any kind. Either way, he came forwards again, slashing down over his head. Only just manage to dodge by stepping slightly to the side, and – holy crap is that my _hair_? That was too close for comfort. Oh, right, he's open now. Slash at his back, and that's him wounded and bleeding properly.

"Better." He grunted, standing up straight. I...must have hit muscles and no organs, then. I thought I'd hit the spinal cord on that slash as well, at the very least scratching it, but no such luck. Shame.

Since when was I so talkative with myself in fights? Get a grip, this is serious.

Here he comes. He's got an attack pattern. Right swing, backswing, overhead swing. That's incredibly easy to abuse – he's changed it. FUCK. Okay. He's ambidextrous, that's interesting, or at the very least he's trained himself to use both hands equally.

Still, that could be dangerous. Let's just keep moving, you're more agile than him, use that to your advantage. Okay, he's gonna charge – now!

Duck underneath the swing, stretch yourself out sword first. Impale through...chest. Did I get the heart? Gods, please, let me hit the heart. I don't think I could have kept that up for much longer, I'm sweating like a pig.

"...please." Mustafa choked into my ear. "Spare my men. Look after your new family, pup."

Oh lordy he's heavy, shove him off – there. He's gone. Take a look up, Cameron, see if his guys are going to do as he said – and they're all dropping their weapons. Good.

...why can't I feel my shield arm? Oh, come on, not _again_. So that's where he hit me when he swapped hands the first time. Okay. Uh, I can see bone. That's not good.

Don't pass out, you pass out fucking enough as-is.

"YOU _IMBECILE!_"

"Anna, gods, careful with the arm -AAAAGH!"

THAT'S NOT CAREFUL, THAT'S RAMMING THE BONE BACK INSIDE THE FLESH AND CRACKING IT TOGETHER! Thank you for the healing staff – wait, they hurt even more than the injury don't they OH GOD YES THEY DO. Ow. Ugh. Well, my left arm's stiff. Anna shifted it back and forth for a second before nodding.

"Okay, it'll be fine. Don't use it for a few days." She let out a sigh of relief. "Gods, you scared me."

"I know, I know. Sorry." I winced, flexing my arm. Ow – why would you slap it?

"I just said not to move it? Gods, do I need to tie it to you or something?" She groaned, rolling her eyes. "Come on."

She helped me up the stairs, where...oh lordy, they're all impressed.

Help me.

"You truly have improved." Frederick nodded in satisfaction. "If only you participated in - "

"I'm sure he'd rather have recovery time, Frederick." Robin cut him off hastily. "Either way...good work. We, ah, might have to explain to Phila it's your fault she doesn't get to fight. She was looking forward to it."

"She doesn't strike me as the bloodthirsty type." Libra commented with a frown. Chrom rolled his shoulders and let out a deep groan.

"She appears to have developed a complex about not not being able to protect Emm." He grumbled. "At this rate, she might just try to replace herself with Cameron and Julian."

"Hey, no." Julian raised his hands. "I get by on brains, skill, and having a giant bird. Cameron gets by on pure fucking dumb luck."

I really want to argue against him there, but I can't. Robin chuckled.

"He does seem to rely on that, doesn't he. I also can't help but notice that every time he falls from a high place, we win the battle."

Oh come on, I didn't fall from a high place this time!

...

Wait, I jumped off the wall didn't I. Oh, come on!

"Robin." I said calmly. "I don't care how much of a good luck charm it is, I'm not jumping off a cliff at some point in every battle, got it?"

Robin raised his hands in surrender, smirking. "Oh, I'm sure I'll find a way to make it happen."

"...arrogant dick." I grumbled. Still, with the army milling about, it's as good a time as any to check up on something. "Has Chrom talked to Cordelia yet?"

"Not yet." Robin rolled his eyes. "He said he'd get around to it."

"She's literally right there." I pointed to about five paces behind Chrom, making the prince turn around. Thankfully she was looking the other way and talking animatedly with Sumia. Chrom coughed into his hand, flushing.

"Maybe after a battle isn't the best time to broach the subject...?" He said weakly.

"NOW, Chrom." Robin growled. Chrom's eyes widened at the sudden ferocity and hastily turned to talk to her.

"Er, Cordelia?"

"Oh, Captain!" Cordelia straightened up even further, flushing. "Do you wish to talk to Sumia? I can leave if you want-"

Yeah, she wants to get the hell out of there as soon as possible.

"It's, ah, you I wanted to talk to."

Holy crap that's a deep shade of red.

"God, she's not going to faint is she?" Julian muttered from next to me. Anna's eyes lit up.

"Ten gold says she faints."

"Nobody's going to take that bet, dear." I sigh. Anna rolled her eyes.

"Fine, geez, just trying to lighten the mood a little."

"M-me? Why would you want to talk to me?" Cordelia managed to strangle out of her throat after a good ten seconds of just standing there. Chrom rubbed the back of his head sheepishly.

"I, ah, thought you might want to join me for dinner in the next village?"

...aaaaaand she's gone.

"CORDELIA!"

Well, we're all crowded around the fainted pegasus knight now. Better than before, where we were just watching with morbid interest.

"About time you made a move, Chrom." Vaike muttered. Chrom shot him a glare before glancing to me, panicking.

"Did I come on too strong?"

"No, that's just...ah...that was just Cordelia. You were fine." I said after a few seconds. Chrom let out a brief sigh of relief.

"I think we have smelling salts in the infirmary, I'll take her there." He grunted, scooping her up in his arms.

"She's gonna faint again as soon as she hears about this part." Julian snarked as they walked away. "Bet?"

"No bet, Julian. Definitely no bet."

* * *

A/N: I can't sleep when I'm ill, apparently. Also long conversations with other authors (Or just one) tends to keep your juices flowing. Seriously, blame/thank lambentLodestar for the update speed. THERE, I BROKE THE SYNCHRONIZATION, YOU HAPPY NOW?!

You can blame/thank her by reading Daydreams and Nightmares.

Also, to someguy1 who says s/he's about to start shipping authors, check with her first not me. So, yeah, here's another update, three in three days.

If that doesn't make up for the hiatus nothing will. Anyway, 25 chapters in and holy shit we still haven't finished Plegia.  
...

I may have underestimated how long this fic is going to be. Anyway, I'd do a POV thing at the end like I normally do for a milestone, but instead I've put a poll up on the profile asking for what people would rather see as a one-shot (1000-2500 word range). Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go collapse.


	27. Chapter Twenty-Six (Cam XXVI)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-Six – No Time to Rest**

"Flavia's army is only a short march away." Robin said with a sigh, finally collapsing against the wall. "We can finally start planning on how to end this war."

Chrom rolled his shoulders and nodded. You look...significantly older than you should, to be honest. "Good. The quicker we can end it the better."

Emmeryn gave us a quick glance, looking depressed. "There's no hope for peace, is there?"  
"We're talking about a king that will kill his servant's families if they don't suceed." I supplied helpfully. "Talking ain't going to cut it anymore."

Emmeryn nodded, closing her eyes. "I see."

"With that in mind, however, we should be able to limit casualties on both sides if we strike at Gangrel himself rather than treat this as a war against a country." Robin muttered to himself. "It'll be risky, though. We would leave Ylisse and Ferox undefended."

"Is it possible, Robin?" Chrom said quietly. Robin narrowed his eyes, unfurled his map and started placing models all over it.

"Let's see...if what our prisoners report is true, then he should be here." His finger tapped down on a small stretch of land next to the capital. "Whoever burnt down the palace forced him to set up camp. They believe he'll start a march on Ylisstol, and relocate his court there...as a taunt, more than likely."

He just started smirking. That's not a good sign.

"We should be able to ambush _him _for a change. Refreshing. Look here." He tapped down on a thin canyon. "If he intends to reach Ylisstol as fast as possible, he'll have to march through this valley. If we place archers and mages along the cliff's edge, then have our army attack from the two ends of the valley, he'll have no choice to either surrender or die. Even if he clues in on this and attempts to go around, we'll be close enough that we can relocate our forces. Whats more, his intelligence will tell him that our army is off over here-" He tapped a small selection of hills slightly to the east of the valley. "-and he'll either head through the valley as planned or go to the west, where our secondary contingent will be waiting to either engage in open battle there – not what we want to happen – or redeploy to close off the other end of the valley."

Why are those models _always _on hand?

"Robin." I muttered. "You are scarily prepared."  
"Well, I hope the rest of you are, because if we're going to get there on time we need to leave right now!" He said cheerfully. Wait, but...

"Robin, we'll need some time to rest. At the very least Flavia's men will." Chrom said, alarmed. "Gods, are we even packed?"  
"No, but Anna's a neat freak so the inventory can be in the wagons in less than an hour." I frowned. "Question is how we're going to get the wagons through that complete mess we left out front."

"Ha!" Basilio barked. "All you're going to need to do is give 'em a shove! How come you're trembling at the thought?"

"Because strength is not my forte." I grumbled, before sighing. "Well, I'm going to start packing it up."

"Good. Commander Phila, send out a messenger to Flavia's troops. Tell them to wait where they are until we meet up with them, then be prepared to start marching the other way." Robin grimaced. "It's going to be a long walk."

For you, maybe. I get to ride in the cart!

* * *

"Well, hello hero of the hour." Anna batted her eyelashes as I dashed into the storeroom. "Come to pay what you owe?"

"Yeah, gonna have to keep piling interest on that." I grunted. "...also, could you stop with the fake flirting? It's really creeping me out."

Anna sighed and rolled her eyes. "Oh, you're no fun. Fine, then, why are we packing up?"

"Because we've got an obscenely long cart ride all the way back to a valley near Ylisstol." I groaned, grabbing a barrel of assorted iron swords. "We need to be outta here by the end of the day."

"Wonderful." Anna climbed out of her makeshift chair – is that seriously our fund bag? - and grabbed the iron axe chest. "Do you think you could round up some help?"

"Planning to." I grunted, beginning the awkward walk to the wagons and grabbing assorted shepherds as I passed.

"Vaike, grab the water barrels."

"Donnel, get the fruit basket."

Those were REGULAR encounters. The next one...wasn't.

"Lissa, can you...actually, you just stay there. Can I steal Lon'qu, though? No? Okay, just a thought..."

I'm content to just let that go and squee about a successful ship later. Anna, on the other hand, wasn't.

"Also, I'd recommend anywhere other than the staircase to kiss him, dearie." Please stop, we don't have time for this. "Because Chrom or Emmeryn could come down them at any second."

Let's...let's just go. Okay? Can we go?

Thank the gods.

"Oh, don't make that face." Anna simpered as she walked past. "That could have been their reactions to us."

"That doesn't mean I can't use it!" I shouted after her, trying to keep up. "Just makes me a hypocrite, nothing wrong with that!"

"There's _plenty _wrong with that, Cameron." She sighed dramatically as we finally reached the wagon and she shoved it in. "There's plenty wrong with you."

"Wasn't aware you went for defective products." I shot back with a smirk. Anna just smirked and shoved me out of the way to go get another case.

"I'll have plenty of time to fix this one, though!"

...oh, nice comeback.

* * *

"You alright?" Stahl asked me for the ten thousandth time this march. I rolled my eyes and groaned at him.

"No, I'm not alright. I told all of you, and I'm pretty sure I had to tell Nowi ten times."

I'm not fucking exaggerating. I've only had this for about the first two days of the march – yes, apparently pushing the wagon through knee-deep upturned mud and snow isn't good for your health – and at least four times a day Hurricane Nowi exposes me to her overcute, overenergetic self and demands to know why I'm not helping anyone.

However, if the horrified squawks and shouts of glee are anything to go by, Nowi has discovered Kylar and I don't need to worry about her for the rest of the day.

"How come your fiance isn't helping you out?" He said with a raised eyebrow

"Someone has to drive the cart." Anna said from the front. "Besides, he's just being a man, it's not that bad."

"It is bad." I muttered. Look, I don't get ill often, but when I do it's actually pretty bad. As in, can't sleep, hard to breathe, bit of a headache, and congested like no tomorrow. Still, better than my sister – DON'T GO DOWN THAT ROAD IN PUBLIC. Okay, train of thought relocated to somewhere that won't disturb me.

"If it was bad, I'd heal you." Lissa scoffed. So, long story short, she wouldn't stop whining. Lon'qu's solution? Toss her in the the transport wagon with me. "You can man up."

"Man up? Lissa, I'm in pain here." I grumbled. "you've got a restore staff. Just use the damn thing."

"And if someone gets poisoned?" Lissa sniffed. "If you'd died because we'd used up the restore staff for someone's cold, how irritated would you be?"

"Not irritated, because I'd be _fucking DEAD!_ Now _please _use the restore staff so I can start helping again or so help me I'll tell Chrom you're engaged!"

Ladies and gentlemen, I have found the miracle cure.

"That was cheating." Anna grumbled. "You used blackmail."

"And in return, you get to have some sleep." I smirked. "Even tradeoff?"

Anna rolled her eyes and ducked back inside. "To an extent."

So begins the hours upon hours of staring at a dirt road until we get somewhere I can actually do things at. Thankfully, even Frederick's starting to lag after such a stupidly long period of time with only three hours sleep a night.

* * *

So, Robin finally calls a halt and tells us to get some sleep. We comply.

Well, he tells all of us except Julian and Kylar to sleep. They get to go out with some supplies and check on where exactly Gangrel's men are.

"That sounds like such a fun way to spend the next two days." Julian grumbled as he strapped the last saddlebag to Kylar. "Nowi, get out of the bag."

"Aw..." The manakete sighed. "I wanna fly on the bird."

"...you...turn into a dragon. You already know what flying's like." Julian said through gritted teeth.

"Yeah, but Kylar has feathers that you can hold onto! It's fun!"

Kylar took multiple steps back at that. Julian rolled his eyes.

"It's a mission that requires speed and stealth..." He sighed. "having you on board will slow us down, and you can't shut up so stealth's not an option."

He appears to have forgotten that this mysterious entity known as Logic doesn't work on natural disasters this small.

"But it's fuuuuuuun" Nowi pouted. Oh, god, the quivering lip. I...don't think anyone's going to be able to resist that, not even you, Julian.

"...dammit. Look, as soon as the war's over, you can ride Kylar by yourself, okay?" He groaned in defeat. Nowi cheered and dashed the other way.

Kylar gave Julian a look that can only be summed up as 'I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME YOU BASTARD'.

"Look, bird, the chances of her remembering this is practically zero." Julian grumbled. "If she does, well, we're faster. We'll just grab Gregor and move in the other direction."

"Skree." Kylar shook his head. Julian sighed and climbed into the saddle.

"Good luck, Julian." I smirked. "Don't get shot down."

"Oh, please, like they've got anything even half as fast as I do." He scoffed. "I'll do a fly-over and then head straight back. Take care of yourself, and use protection. If you don't use protection, name it after me."

...and he's gone before I could reply. Asshole.

* * *

A/N: Hey, guys. Sorry for the short one, but really it felt out-of-place considering everything else that's happening in the next two chapters, and fusing them felt like a bad idea. So here's your brief 1600 words of levity in the march back.

Oh, and another Robin-plan. Can't forget the Robin-plans.

* * *

To keep the meta-shippers happy, here's continuing misadventures of skype.

[10:36:17 PM] Lamby: Busy!

[10:36:28 PM] Cameron: Proofreading I assume.

[10:45:24 PM] Cameron: Let me know. Are we human?

Or are we dancer.

[10:45:34 PM] Lamby: Huh?

[10:45:42 PM] Lamby: Why not both?

[10:46:04 PM] Cameron: It's a song.

[10:46:09 PM] Lamby: Ah.

[10:46:22 PM] Cameron: 98% sure the writer was on drugs.

[10:46:27 PM] Lamby: Sounds romantic. You're having a job keeping me convinced you're not trying to hit on me.

* * *

[12:17:03 AM] Cam: Shuddup, sweetheart.

[12:17:10 AM] Lamby: -chuckles-

[12:17:11 AM] Lamby: Nah.

[12:17:53 AM] Lamby: I imagine you'd like me for more than my sweet heart, but also for the spicy lips, too.

[12:17:59 AM] Lamby: okay that was WAY TOO STRONG

[12:18:06 AM] Cam: Well I couldn't comment on the latter.

[12:18:34 AM] Cam: And I think we've started actually flirting. We need to back out.

* * *

[2:32:09 PM] Cam: me neither

[2:32:27 PM] Lamby: But if you have a weakness for sweets, I have half a bag of Kisses and a full bag of Hugs.

[2:32:40 PM] Lamby: (there went the eyebrows)

[2:33:12 PM] Cam: Only half a bag of kisses?

[2:33:18 PM] Lamby: I ate the other half.

* * *

Apparently it's meant to be. Either way, beat you to it by a decent few hours again, sweetheart. Better luck next time~


	28. Chapter Twenty-Seven (Cam XXVII)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-Six – Rising Action**

* * *

Julian should have made it back several hours ago, at least. We'd set up at the far side of the canyon, leaving Basilio and the majority of the Feroxi soldiers on the other side to close off their line of retreat. Naturally, it's nighttime and still no sign of the bastard.

"Ay, he's taking his time isn't he?"

...oh holy fuck it's a Gregor. I don't believe I've ever talked with a Gregor.

"Yup, he is. Probably got lost or something." I shrugged. "Not like he knows the area."

"Ya, he told me he was from Valm." Gregor shrugged as he sat down next to me and pulled out a large silver flask. "Did he ever tell you about some of our jobs?"

I'm not getting out of this conversation, am I? Might as well try and enjoy it, then.

"No, never. We've been talking about the old days, I guess." Old days. Christ, it's only been, what, seven months? Seven months, the war's almost over, I've killed god-knows-how-many men (The count's probably in the upper double digits, what with me pulling one of those ropes for Robin's batshit plan), 'home' now equates to the Shepherd's barracks that I've spent around two weeks in total, and I'm fucking _engaged_.

There's something odd in the water around here.

"Ay, well, one time he says to me on job that he can't die." Gregor shrugged. "So Gregor said, of course he can die, all men die. Julian just grinned, said he couldn't die while Kylar lived."

He took a swig of whatever the hell that is – god, it smells like petrol, what's in that – and frowned.

"So I ask what if Kylar die? Julian shrug, say he let Kylar answer. So, Kylar answer, and he say-"

"Skree." I smirked. Gregor grinned widely.

"Ay, 'skree'. Of course, this only one month into knowing Julian and Kylar, so I say Kylar is just bird, he not smart." Gregor frowned. "...Gregor wake up next morning upside down on top of tent, dangling by shorts and with big beak-hole in trouser leg. That was when I think, Gregor, maybe Julian's right. Maybe he can't die while Kylar around, and Kylar is smart bird. Kylar not going to be doing the dying any time soon, right?"

"I find it odd that we're relying on the bird rather than our friend, here." I sigh, getting up. It's getting kind of nippy out here.

"Well, that's what we'd think." Gregor chuckled. "The bird is the competent one."

"You've got that right, and that's actually a little depressing." I grumble as I walk away. "G'night, Gregor."

"Sleep well. Don't let bed bugs bite pretty girl also in bed, aye?"

* * *

"Well, look who's running late." Chrom muttered as he squinted up into the sky.

"He must have run into some trouble." Robin sighed. "There's no other reason for him to have taken theat long."

"Well, he's here. Late or not, that's something." Flavia smirked. "Let's go say hello, shall we?"

We walked through the temporary camp we'd set up on the other side of the valley, while Julian and Kylar circled a few more times before descending right in front of us.

"Yay! Kylar's back!" Nowi cheered, dashing out of some...you know what? I don't even know. It looked like an oversized sock. Kylar and Julian glanced at each other, eyes wide with panic, before Julian slapped Kylar's side and the griffon took off into the air.

"Sorry, Nowi, he's hungry and needs to hunt." He grinned. "He'll be here when he gets back, alright?"

"aww..." She sighed. "Fiiine."

With that, Hurricane Nowi took her exit and Julian could actually give his report.

"We're _so _fucked!" He said cheerfully. "Someone get me a drink."

"That bad?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, you have _no _idea how much trouble we're in." He grinned. "No, seriously, I need a drink, I saw some pretty disturbing shit out there."

* * *

Julian had flat out refused to tell us anything until I'd gone and gotten him a flask of whiskey, which he'd emptied in one chug.

"Well, that's better." He grimaced, slumping back in the camp chair. "So...good news, bad news, or disturbing news?"

"...I'll take the good news first." Robin sighed. "Followed by the bad, and top it off with the disturbing."

"Excellent. Arright, the good news is, they're falling for it. Heading straight for the canyon like Grima's breathing down their back. They'll be there by tomorrow." Robin nodded and moved the model representing Gangrel and his royal guard forwards. "Yeah, no, you're gonna need more models than that."

Robin slowly turned to face him. "...how many more?"

"Well...how big is a regiment or company or whatever the hell you call them?" He bit his lip, putting his feet up on the table. Phila growled at him, eye twitching.

"Would you show a little more decorum in the presence of the Exalt?"

"Phila, it's alright." Emmeryn said soothingly. "A regular company consists of one hundred men, Julian."

"Right, and one of those models is either a company or a special detachment like the Royal Guard or us, right?" Julian asked, turning to Robin, who nodded. "Okay, you're gonna need...uh, ten more models."

Robin paused, opened his satchel, and frowned. "I...don't have that many." He admitted. "Well, that's an issue, but nothing we can't deal with, we'll just have to use plan B."

"...what's plan b?" Chrom asked after a few seconds of silence. Robin's frown turned into a grin.

"We cause a landslide."

There's a few seconds of awkward silence as we all just look at Robin. "...my friend, you have a problem and we need to talk about it as soon as it stops being useful." I said, pinching my nose. "Arright," Oh, god, Julian's slang is infectious. "what's the disturbing news?"

"Gangrel might have burnt down every village in his way regardless of who's side its on." He said cheerfully. "So, judging from the smoke, I'd say the current civilian death toll is up in the thousands."

"...gods." Emmeryn whispered. "Why?"

"There's a beast in every man." Chrom growled.

"...and it stirs whenever you put a sword in his hand." Julian smirked. "I'm familiar with the saying."

It's a sodding Game of Thrones quote, not a saying, and you bloody know it Julian. Still, if it's a traditional saying over here, I might as well use that line I've always wanted to.

"I always thought there should be an add-on." I shrugged. "something along the lines of 'but it stops stirring when you put a sword in his heart'."

"I'll try my best." Chrom said darkly. "That's unforgivable."

Emmeryn sank against the walls of the tent, shivering. "So many people...what is wrong with the man?"

"Other than being completely insane?" Julian shrugged. "I dunno, maybe he's out on the eye-for-an-eye theory. Your father _did _do a number on his country, remember."

"Sins of the father, Julian." I hissed, making him flinch.

"...right. Yeah. Sorry, that was in bad taste." He glanced at the empty flask and sighed. "Got any more of this?"

"Come with me and I'll get you some." I nodded, getting up. Julian followed me out of the tent kind of awkwardly. As soon as we were gone, I heard Robin lean over the table and start talking animatedly, hopefully in a good way.

* * *

"What the hell came over you in there, Julian?"

"...ugh, I dunno." He scowled as we walked into the supply tent. "It's like...it's different, on the battlefield, you know? You've got adrenaline, they've got adrenaline, one of you dies, the other lives, et cetera. But they – hell, he went after his own people if they were in his way. He's gone completely off the deep end."

I passed him another flask, and he uncorked it and swigged half of it in one go.

"It's, like, nothing reminds you more of your own mortality than finding yourself staring at a hundred soldiers setting fire to a church, you know?" He laughed bitterly. "God, it's just...finding someone to blame is all you can really do, right? At least we have one, right?"

"...yeah. Yeah, we do. Just focus on that, okay?" I put a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it. He glanced back at me and took another swig, scowling.

"Yeah, we do. Shame is, I'm probably not going to be the one who gets to put a few inches of steel into him." He growled. "...damn, I probably shouldn't drink any more of this. Hungover plus battle equals throwing up all over Kylar. He was pissed when Gregor did that to him."

I stared at him for a good few seconds. "...seriously? SERIOUSLY?"

"Yup." Julian smirked. "He drank too much after one contract, heaved all over Kylar's wing."

"One of these days, you two are going to have to sit me down and tell me exactly what the hell you were doing before we found you screaming on top of a dragon." I chuckled. Julian grinned, raised the flask at me, and proceeded to pour the rest on the ground.

"Here's to staying sober, no matter how much I disapprove of the concept."

"I'd have thought you'd approve entirely, after the time you got so drunk you lost an argument with a _slope_."  
Julian shot a glare at me that, by all rights, should have killed me. "Never tell anyone that story."

"What're you?!" I mocked, pointing at the ground and slurring my words. "You're not stairs, but you go up. Why'd you exist? STOP MOCKING ME!"

Ow. Did you just throw the flask at my head? Yes, yes you did.

"Asshole. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go chat with my old partner, see if he's up to heading back out again after the war...well, until the other one of course."

"Of course." I sighed, waving him out. Let's just hope he's alright, the shit he's seen must have been pretty horrifying.

* * *

"Thanks fer helping out, Cameron." Donnel sighed as he checked another one of his snares. "Darn it, empty."

"I was under the impression we had salted meat, but fresh stuff is welcome." I shrugged. Even if it is rabbit or marmot or something, its better than salted pork for the twentieth day in a row. Trail rations are so BORING.

"Well, it's not like we got anything, so it looks like ye've wasted yer time." Donnel sighed, standing straight. "Just guess the rabbits didn't come this way. I knew I saw some earlier..."

Idea. "Hey, Donny. You think we could sneak around to the other side of this patch of forest before dark?"

Donnel glanced at the sky, biting his lip. "Prolly. Why?"

"All your traps point towards camp, right? So they run into them when coming to investigate...or running from a very loud guy waving a stick."

Donnel grinned and nodded. "Right, that might work. Good thinkin'."

At least he appears to have dropped his hero worship of me since he's developed his own actual skills. "Let's go, then."

It's a small forest, probably only a 2x1 tile - oh, god, am I still thinking in game terms? I thought I was past that at this point - but it's still a pretty long walk around the edge to avoid spooking any of them.

"'ey, Cameron. Can ah ask a question?"

"Sure, Donny. Shoot."

"Wha' made ye win yer fight their general?"

...the sodding hero worship's back isn't it. "Donny, I think Mustafa was holding back." I sighed. "He wanted his men treated well, he was a good man. I took that from him."

That is much more depressing now that I'm actually spending time reflecting on it. Ah, well, his choice.

Donnel nodded thoughtfully as we pulled around the side of the forest, before grabbing a pair of sticks. "Ready?"

"Ready." I nodded. "Why'd you ask, anyway?"

"Nothin', just 'cause I made a bet that you won properly. Stahl thought it was luck, Vaike wasn't in for once, and, ah..." Donnel suddenly looked very sheepish. "We might owe the war chest fair bit of gold."

"Why the war chest?"

"Frederick refused to place a bet for 'imself, instead insisted it help the shepherds."

Frederick bet against me? Frederick? He did a BET?!

"Whatever, let's just start beating." I sighed, raising my stick. "Ready?"

"Aye."

With that, we started thrashing our way through the undergrowth. With any luck, this'll be a highly successful trip.

* * *

It was. "I'll drop these off, Donny, you go hand in your cash." I smirked, making the kid flush and run away. God, kid, he's only 16? That's not that young, younger than me though. Official adult! Either way, I now have to drop off this large brace of like thirty rabbits to the shepherds mess tent.

I pity the poor bastards on mess duty tonight, it's not like - why are people doing stuff this early? It's only just started to turn dark!

"...what are you doing?" I asked as I stood in front of the open tent, where Stahl and Virion were running back and forth between various pots and pans.

"Desperately trying to cook something restaurant-quality." Stahl replied, dropping a handful of diced...something into a pot.

"Okay, I can see that. Why?"

"Because, in what is truly most unbecoming of a woman being courted by royalty," Virion huffed as he poured no small amount of wine – THAT'S where that went, I've been looking for that – into another pan. "Cordelia has stated that she could not wait for their meal."

"...makes sense, from her perspective." I shrugged. "What's with you two running around like Nowi after getting into Gaius' treat bag?"

Thank god that situation is still purely hypothetical, I don't even want to imagine it.

Stahl sighed. "Frederick overheard her, and he reported it to Chrom immediately. He panicked, thinking he might leave it too long, and begged us to do something."

"You poor bastards." I winced, storing away the image of Chrom on his knees begging for a favor away to laugh at another day. "Well, have fun with that. Donnel and I brought you some rabbits-" I held the brace up and put them down on the counter "-to cook for us mere mortals, so as soon as you've got time. Oh, and Virion? Your bib's on fire."

Virion gave a distinctly unmanly shriek as I left the tent, followed by a loud crash. _That _I could laugh at right now.

"What's all the noise?"

"HAHHAHA...oh, hey Cordelia. Don't worry about it, it's just..." How to explain this without ruining Chrom's surprise for her and killing a potential ship? "...Virion."

"Ah."

"...yeah." I really should be surprised that that was sufficient explanation, but for some reason I'm not. "Anyway, that should cover everything-"

"Hold it."

Urk. Leggo of my collar.

"...yes?" Hard to breathe, let go. Let go. Please let go. Let...thank you. "Yeesh, what was that for?"

"You put Chrom up to this, didn't you?" She hissed, narrowing her eyes. "Didn't you?"

Did I mess up? "Well, Robin helped." I muttered, shuffling nervously. Didn't she mention in her supports with Severa that she's a bad runner? If I make a break for it I should be able to get away.

"Is this a joke to you?" PUT THE SPEAR DOWN WOMAN THERE'S NO NEED TO GET ANGRY OH GODS.

"Of course not, he was perfectly willing!" ...is it safe to push that away? "But he was completely fugging clueless. All I did was prod."

She's standing there looking uncertain, let's slowly push the tip of the spear AWAY from my face...there we are. "We good now?"

"I..." Oh, dear, she's flushing. "...thankyou."

"What was that?" Why are you doing this Cameron you just _know _this is a bad idea. "Did you say something?"

"I said THANK YOU!" She almost screamed. Almost, thankfully.

Let's get the hell outta here before she stabs me.

* * *

"So where the hell's the captain?" Sully grunted as she stabbed her food somewhat viciously. An exhausted Virion and Stahl lay next to her, passed out and moaning.

"He's out on his date." Lissa shrugged, frowning. "...is this bear meat?"

"Rabbit, actually." Donnel said happily, before flinching. Slowly we all turned to face Panne. "...uh, no offense?"

The taguel stared at us and resumed nibbling away at her carrot, evidently just letting the faux pas go by. For now. She might be plotting revenge - what am I saying? It's Panne, not some psycho bunny.

"What kind of last meal is that?" Lissa groaned after the mini incident never occurred and we shall never mention it again.

"Just eat it, Lissa." Julian grunted. The princess frowned at him.

"Well I'm sorry if not all of us want to stoop to eating anything this gamey!" She huffed. "Besides, I'm not expecting you to have any taste!"

"...Well." Julian paused, then grinned at me. No. Don't say it.

"I know what you're thinking, Julian. Don't say it." I said calmly. "If you say it, this really _will _be your last meal."

I can see him consider it. It's just...wow. Please don't say it, I'll actually stab you and we might need your help tomorrow.

"...I won't say it if you let me get the violin out."

Bugger.

"You know what? Sod it. Do whatever you want." I sighed. He clapped his hands together and dashed back to his tent, almost giggling. "I'm so sorry, everyone, but this was the better option."

"...I'll take your word for it." Lon'qu sighed.

"U-um..."

Holy crap, a wild Olivia appeared.

"Hey, what's up?"

Bad approach. Wild Olivia has fled.

"Dammit, Cam." Vaike grumbled. "She was going to dance for us if you hadn't said anything!"

"Okay, so that kinda sucks." I admitted. "Still didn't expect you to care about the arts."

Wait, this is Vaike we're talking about. Oh, crap, he's gonna turn this into a damn 'she's hot' joke isn't he?

"Oh, come on, surely you've noticed her..." He gestured with his hands where Olivia's hips probably would be. "...right? Man, we're missing out on not seeing that move."

"You're a pig." Sully snorted, taking a swig of her drink. Vaike frowned.

"Oh, come on!" He turned to me, pleading. "You're gonna back me up on this, right?"

"I'm _engaged _you nimrod." I sighed, glancing at my food. "I'm not going to ogle someone else when I've already got the real thing."

"Something you want to do tonight?" Anna asked from behind me, probably holding back a chuckle.

Urk.

"I...ah...that is to say-" HELP. ME. "-oh gods don't hit me."

"I'm not going to hit you." Anna sighed, sitting next to me and poking at her food. "Also, I'd recommend against going anywhere near Chrom and Cordelia's date. Clothes haven't come off yet, but they might in the future."

"Oh gods, I don't need to know these things." Lissa shivered.

"That...didn't take long." Stahl said after a second. "Moving pretty fast, aren't they?"

Hey, all they have to do is get more support points with each other than Sumia, and they auto-marry. "People tend to see things clearer when they might not live to see tomorrow." I pointed out, groaning. "Anyway-"

"Why's everyone so glum?"

...and Julian's back with a violin.

I hate my life.

"Come on, we're about to go to our deaths, let's be a little more cheerful about it shall we?" Julian grinned. "Hey, Cameron, you can sing-"

"No, I can't."

"Yes, you can-"

"NO." I growl. "No, no, GODS no."

"...one song, and you get to run off with your fiance and do fiance things. You don't do one song, I follow you."

"You're going to have to follow me, Julian." I sighed, really wanting this farce to be over with. "I'm not singing, you _know _I suck."

"I like to live on the edge." Julian grinned, walking up to us before being halted by Anna's knife appearing at his waist. "Then again, I've been having second thoughts about the edge. Not an ideal location. Maybe somewhere in the middle..."

Anna's knife didn't budge until he'd backed off, making him sigh.

"Alright, fine. Killjoys." He sat back down and fiddled with the strings. "Heck, I can't even remember how to use this thing. Much prefer a guitar."

"I'm sure you would, Julian." I grumbled, finishing my food and glancing around the rest of the shepherds. It's odd, really, there's only a handful of them I really have conversations with – did I ever talk to Miriel?

I've been meaning to lord basic Primary school science over her. I'm a horrible person. Meh, I'll do that some other time, I've got a better idea.

First step, putting my plate down next to me. "Care to grab that for me, Kellam?"

I'll be perfectly honest, not going to listen to his answer. I know he's there, though, because the plate's moving.

Second step, grab waifu, sling her over your shoulder and start walking.

"Put me down." Anna deadpanned, slapping my back. Not very hard, mind. "Oh no, someone help me, he's going to have his manly ways with me."

"You're not putting up much of a resistance...or complaining, really."

"Well, I supposed I'm flattered that I'd provoke such a reaction-"

"WOULD YOU TWO AT LEAST MAKE IT TO YOUR DAMN TENT BEFORE STARTING?!" Sully shouted after us, provoking laughter from the rest of the shepherds as we vanished around the corner and into the wagon.

"What got into you?" Anna sighed as I sat her down on the bedroll. "I thought we already had the intimacy conversation."

"No, you had the intimacy conversation. I freaked out and found myself unable to respond." I sighed, slumping down next to her. "What did you even say again?"

She bit her lip and toyed a little with that necklace she'd gotten before our only date. God, relationships move fast in this dimension. "...you know what? Never mind, possible last chance and all that." She sighed, sliding the curtains at the front shut. "My parents would kill me if they knew I did this before we were married, so don't tell them."

...oh god.

"Anna, I'm really not sure I'm ready to go that far-" _You're a disgrace to teenaged males everywhere, Cameron._"-but if you're completely sure I guess I can-"

"Pig." Anna rolled her eyes before sliding in next to me. "I wasn't going to. Of course, I wouldn't be adverse to a little heavy petting..."

"What are you, a dog?" I sighed, wrapping my arms around her. "How does one even go about that?"

"Gods, you're innocent." Anna whispered, slowly slinking up to eye level with me. "I'm going to have so much fun corrupting you-"

I'm going to enjoy getting corrupted - WHAT IS IT, GAIUS?!

"Just as a warning." The thief growled. "Nowi found my spare candy stash. Might wanna double check every nook and cranny for her."

He slid the curtain shut, and with the mood officially gone - and the chance of Ceiling Nowi making things just CREEPY - Anna sighed and slumped down on my chest.

"Foiled again."

I hate the fact of that too, although at least I solved the mystery of 'what was Nowi hiding inside' from earlier today. We finally manged to drift off...to...sleep...

* * *

A/N: At CH30, we'll be officially done with the Plegia arc, at which point its on to the Timeskip. 28's the big important chapter, and it'll take a while to put together (Estimated size: 6000-7000 words, but it's an emotional drain too which makes it a pain to write). lambentLodestar, just because you know whats coming gives you no right to spoil it for anyone. ANYWAY here's a thing: Starting with the timeskip arc, I'll be switching POV for full chapters, because there's a lot of ground to cover. It's why I've gone back and renamed the display name for the chapters to Cam I, Cam II, etc.

Anyway...what else is there. Oh, right, voting for the 25 chapters oneshot is now CLOSED. 31 people voted, and by an EXTREMELY narrow margin it looks like I'll be writing Straight Silver. It'll get done after CH30, at which point (Yeah I know nobody [except lambentLodestar, who laughs manically and tries to catch up with me] likes it when I do this shut up) I'll be going on a week or two of hiatus to plot out the timeskip arc in more detail.

That moment when you realize the timeskip might take more chapters than Plegia. Anyway, I'm going to quit here.

...I'm a liar, apparently. TIL you don't write Author's Notes as a stream-of-conciousness thing because it's a disorganized MESS. Anyway, expect a oneshot in 3rd person detailing Chrom and Cordelia's meal before the weekend's out.

Right. Now I'm leaving.


	29. Chapter Twenty-Eight (Cam XXVIII)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-Eight – Climax**

**Warning: This chapter contains some moments of graphic violence and healing. This chapter is the reason I asked if I should bump up to 'M', and the question is re-asked as a result of this chapter. **

A/N: What? The Author's Notes at the beginning of the chapter instead of the end? What heresy is this? Well, I'm not sure you'll be focused enough by the end of this ten-page behemoth of a chapter (By my standards), although the size isn't the reason for the delay. Blame lambentLodestar for constantly talking to me ALL. WEEK. For that. Anyway, the Chrom/Cordelia thing...didn't happen because I couldn't get it to work, although I'll do it eventually. Other than that, once we get past Chapter 30, this is just a reminder that I'll be taking a short break to plan out the next arc and write the assorted oneshots I've been promising to do (And spend another week on Fool of Fools updates). So, with that all said and done, let's get to it!

* * *

"Alright, everyone, here's the plan." Robin spread the map out over the table, glancing around the shepherds and Flavia's officers. "Basilio and his troops are blocking off the rear entrance. Flavia, you'll take the majority of your men and around one quarter of the shepherds and lead a frontal assault. Commander Phila, the pegasus knights will take the remaining of the remaining shepherds and await my signal, at which point you will deploy them as a strike force against Gangrel and his royal guard."

"You've lost some of the shepherds, Robin." Chrom deadpanned, making him chuckle. "Has Kellam's issue become contagious?"

That got a stronger laugh from everybody.

"No, they'll be up on the canyon walls, ready to cause a landslide." Robin grinned, tapping the sides. "Once the center portion of Gangrel's men is in this area, we'll send down the boulders that Basilio and his men have spent the last few days carving. With their impacts down the side of the canyon, the rest of the cliff should follow. Speaking of which, thank you for the math on that, Miriel."

"It was a pleasure." The mage sniffed, adjusting her glasses.

"Anyway, these groups will consist of-" please not me please not me please not me- "Cameron, Lissa and Stahl on one side, with Sully, Virion and Kellam on the other."

Son of a bitch.

"...Robin, just to be clear, I am not jumping off a cliff for you. I refuse." I grumble, glancing down the canyon. The sunlight was strong enough that you could actually see the beginnings of Gangrel's army as this black mass on the horizon. What did he say we had to set up, like three hours?

"Well darn, there goes our lucky charm." Robin deadpanned. "Either way, the plans the same. Meeting adjourned."

Fine, fine. "We better get moving, then." Julian clapped his hands together. "Anyone fancy a lift to the cliff?"

"Fuck flying, I'll walk. No need to tempt the god of gravity." I sighed, walking past him. Miriel's head perked up as she frowned.

"What is 'gravity'?"

"It hates me." I groan, heading towards the supply wagon. "If you'll excuse me, I need to get ready."

The supply wagon had a huge line outside by the time I got there, with Anna dashing in and out with weapons, breathing hard.

"Get in line, pal." A feroxi archer grumbled as I walked past. "Bloody shepherds, think they're better than all of us."

Yes. That's because we are, Green Unit. "Need a hand, sweetheart?"

Anna's head shot up as she stumbled out with a barrel of javelins that heavily armored knights began to fight over. "Oh, gods, yes. Are we fighting together, then?"

Uh oh.

"Not as such." I sighed. "It looks like you'll be part of Chrom's strike group, while I'll be off on a cliff triggering traps-"

"-and leaping from heights to secure our victory once again?" She smiled impishly as she passed the rude archer from before a steel bow. "Well, don't make me keep you. Your stuff is on our bedroll."

Nodding, I walk inside and slip the chainmail on. Holy crap, like all of the stuff is gone. Still, I suppose we won't need any more gear after this. Well, not for two years anyway.

"Well, that's the last of them." Anna sighed, before frowning. "...you've got that on wrong."

Grabbing the side of the shirt, she tugged it in a few directions before nodding. "There, that's better."

"I...fail to see or feel the difference." I frowned. Anna rolled her eyes.

"Oh, there's no _physical _difference. You do cut a more dashing figure like this, though." She giggled. "Go on, hero. Try not to die."

A light shove to my chest forced me outside, rolling my eyes. "Yeah, you be careful too, okay?"

"I'm not the one you need to be warning, dear!" She called from inside. "Wait up a minute, though."

Well, when she demands you wait, you sodding wait. It took her about four minutes to do whatever it was she wanted and – okay, she was just suiting up for battle.

"Thank god, I was worried you were wasting time trying to make yourself look pretty." Danger. Danger, Will Robinson. "...not that you need it, of course."

"Of course." She rolled her eyes. "I'm not going to waste time powdering my nose when I could be polishing a sword to make sure I accomplish my goal of _not dying_."

"What exactly did you want me to wait for, anyway?" I asked, frowning. Seriously, at this rate I'm going to need to grab a pegasus or Kylar to get there on time.

Or, god forbid, ask Nowi for a ride. That will always – _always –_ be a last resort.

"Oh, just to give you something." She sighed, unhooking something from around her neck. "You know, you're meant to do this with something the guy bought you, but you were there when I got it so..."

She smiled up at me and passed over her small glass charm. Yeah, that's definitely the Eye of Isha. Still, not relevant, it's just an odd reference across time and space designed to mess with my head.

"You keep this on, and you make sure I get it back, okay?" Anna smiled as I looped it over my head.

"Hey. I'll be fine." I smiled back. "...make sure you're there for me to give it back."

There was a brief pause as we both looked at each, processing what I'd just said.

"That was _awful_."

"Yeah, it was." I nodded, sighing. "Well..."

"I'll see you later." Anna whispered, brushing her lips against mine. "You'll get the rest then."

"The rest?"

And...she's gone. I could probably follow the laughter, but I've really got to get a move on. Alright, let's find Lissa and Stahl – oh, there they are.

"Ready to go, Cam?" Stahl asked, stifling a sigh. Lissa groaned as she looked up the side.

"I'm not going to have to help you push, am I?"

"No, you're not." I smirk. "I'm pretty sure Stahl and I can handle it. Alright, let's be off, then. Nae time fer talkin!"

God, it's no wonder I don't use my full accent that often. It's annoying even to me.

"What _was _that?" Stahl asked after a horrified second. "It sounded like Gregor choking on a cat!"

"Look, let's just start walking, okay?" I grumbled, pushing past them.

* * *

Lissa kicked a small rock against the cliff wall for the 100th time since we got here. "When are we going to staaaaaart?"

"You seem unusually keen to be an accessory to mass murder." I said off-handedly as I squinted down at the valley. "And could you keep it down? If they hear us, it's all over."

"Fiiine." Lissa sighed, slumping down next to us and fiddling with her engagement ring. "But how long will it taaaake?"

"As long as it takes for Robin to launch the signal." I sighed, stretching. "At which point, we make our way down to join the front lines."

"Stop recapping the plan every half hour, it's annoying." Stahl groaned, ruffling around in his kitbag to find out he did not, in fact, have another loaf of bread. "...now I'm out of food."

"Well I'm sorry if I'm keeping my nerves down." I grumbled, resisting the urge to snap. "The quicker we get this over with, the better."

"I'm not disagreeing with you." Stahl said quickly. "It's just that you're making yourself more nervous, as well as us."

He's got a point. So, awkward silence it is...awkward, awkward, awkward...

"So, either of you two got any food left?"

Oh, that is it, Stahl. You can't seriously need to eat any more, I'm already about to snap, stop asking me-

"There!" Lissa gasped, pointing at a rapidly rising blue firework. "The signal!"

"Good call." I grunted, leaning against my rock. "Gods, I hope Miriel's math on this was correct..."

"Even if she wasn't, it'll terrify them." Stahl commented, preparing to push his. The firework exploded, and HEAVE.

There she goes!

There she goes...there she goes...there she goes...there they all go...huh, it's getting pretty hard to stand here-

"GET BACK!"

Yanking Lissa by the button-hairdress-thing, Stahl and I scramble back against the wall of the cliff as more of the canyon wall comes away than anticipated. Well, now we're all stuck on this ledge, sitting ducks for any arrows.

"We're going to have to try and get up, down's not an option!" Stahl shouted, jerking his head upwards. Thank god he left his horse behind, poor creature would have been killed in that.

"Alright. I'll give you a boost, okay?" I grunted, cupping my hands and hauling the knight – armor and all – up onto the next ledge. "Alright, Lissa, your turn."

"Bu-but-" Okay, she's terrified. "It's so high! What if you drop me?!"

"Lissa, my track record with surviving falls is high. You'll be fine." I said soothingly. "Besides, Stahl's going to pull you up."

"He's right." Stahl grunted, leaning over and extending his hand down. "After this, there's a path leading up to the top and we can take the long way down."

"Alright..." Lissa sighed, stepping into my hands. Then the floor cracks. "Eep!"

"Grab her!" I screamed, practically tossing her in the air. Stahl's hands clamp around her wrist, and now I'm falling.

Well fuck you too, gravity. Okay, who's gonna catch me this time?

Somebody?

Anybody?

OHGODTHATFLOOR'SGETTINGCLOSE-MYSODDING ARM! OW!

"Were you planning on dropping by?" A thick voice said as my descent suddenly halted. "One second, let Gregor get you to safer ground."

Oh thank god, it's Gregor and Julian. We landed next to the rear of the army, dropping me near Robin and Chrom, who were desperately planning - let's play what went wrong THIS week.

"Is Lissa okay?" Chrom asked, eyes wide.

"She's fine, I tossed her up to Stahl before the cliff collapsed." I groaned. Oh, great, my arm was dislocated when Gregor grabbed me. "...can I have a healer?"

Robin frowned, reached out, and oh god please don't just snap it into place – OW!

"Drink a vulnerary to keep the swelling down, and you'll be fine." He shrugged. "...what? It was just a dislocated shoulder..."

He must have noticed us all staring at him like he'd grown a second head.

"What made you think that was a good idea?" I cursed, popping open the potion. God, these things taste bad.

"Maribelle's been giving me some lessons on how to heal." Robin shrugged. "I can't get the staves to respond, but-"

"Can we please focus?" Chrom asked, stabbing at the map. "What does that change?"

"Absolutely nothing. In fact, it's beneficial." Phila huffed. "With the casualties on our side confirmed zero, the improved damage - "

"It's cut us off from Basilio's forces, we're fighting at half strength." Robin said bluntly. "Additionally, it diverted the flow into Gangrel's regular soldiers. His royal guard is not only intact, but now approaching our lines faster than we anticipated, seeing as their route is not impeded by rubble. However, Commander Phila, you are correct in that we did more damage than anticipated."

Robin gave her a look that can only be described as 'bitch please' "Damage, however, is not the only thing that must be considered in attack plans. Take the airforce up, we're going to need it."

Phila paled and did as she asked, Julian rolling his eyes and following her. Chrom glanced at Robin, smiling slightly.

"You enjoyed that FAR too much."

"Well, knocking Commander I'm-So-Bloody-Perfect Phila down is always a nice way to spend some time." I commented with a grin. "Now, where d'you want me, genius?"

Robin sucked in a breath while he glanced at the map. "...right flank. It's not the most exciting part of the battle, but if Gangrel's got one shred of intelligence left in that insane mind of his he'll realize if it folds we're doomed. Good luck."

"Got it." I nodded, leaving the table and breaking into a jog. Let's get ready to fight, then.

* * *

"Off another cliff? What's this make, four falls?" Gaius sighed, hopping off from a rock as I approached. I ignored his question and turned to Lon'qu, nodding slightly.

"Lissa's safe, Stahl grabbed her before we fell."

Lon'qu closed his eyes and let out a deep breath, before rising. "Good." He sighed softly. Vaike grinned at him.

"Aw, you shoulda seen his face! I haven't-"

"Finish that sentence and you'll die." Lon'qu said calmly, rising to his feet and drawing his first killing edge.

"Alright, fine..." Vaike grumbled. "So...what's the plan?"

Oh for fucks-

"Stay here." Gaius grumbled. "For the twentieth time, Vaike, our part in the plan is to stay here and wait for Gangrel's men to get the charge."

"That's boring." Vaike grumbled, a bunch of feroxi soldiers nodding in agreement. "What's the point of that?"

"Do you want to argue with the tactical genius?" I shot back, smirking. "Just deal with it, gentlemen."

The groaning from the fifty-odd men listening in was actually kinda funny, but we need to deal with this the way he tells us to. One of the archers up front waves at us.

"They're getting closer! Commander Lon'qu, what are your orders?"

"Commander?" I asked after a second. Lon'qu smirked at me.

"I got promoted." He said simply, before standing up. "...archers, prepare to fire. Two volleys, then switch out for soldiers. Ready?"

Wait, that's not the regular enemy army approaching us.

"Lon'qu, that's the fucking royal guard." Gaius breathed, his lollipop dropping out of his mouth. Lon'qu's eyes widened, then narrowed.

"Continue as I commanded, but hold fire until my order." He barked, turning to Gaius. "Gaius, go get Chrom. We need the elite here, and we need it now."

"On it." Gaius said faintly, running off to the side. Heh, he left his bag of candy behind. Lon'qu's eyes narrowed as he drew an off-hand killing edge and raised it, scowling.

"Prepare."

Two hundred paces. Looks like it's mostly compromised of Fighters/Warriors and a handful of Mercenaries/Heroes, to use the game terms. Some mages, too.

Then there's fucking Gangrel, somewhere in the middle. Blast, we're not going to hit him with an arrow like this.

"Draw. Aim." Lon'qu said calmly. One-fifty-paces, wow I've gotten good at measuring this. "Fire volley one."

Okay, they were one-thirty, now they're one-forty because we just took out the front row. Gangrel looks kinda pissed, and I can see him barking some orders to the mages before they do something with their hands and a light green shield envelops the front line. Charge is slower now.

"They have a wind barrier." Lon'qu growled. "Archers, stand down. Soldiers, ready."

The archers fell back as the rest of us moved forwards. Gods, where is Chrom and the elite? Oh, hey, there they are. Kind of a while off, but they're definitely moving here. Robin's doing something with his magic that's meant to mean something to the fliers, but I hope they're paying attention.

Oh, right, fifty paces. Oh, goddamn it, I'm on the front lines again. Just...peachy.

If I fall unconscious, I'm punching Tom in the face, I swear to whatever god actually exists in this stupid world. If I die, well...not much I can do about that.

God, what would I even put in a will? Do I even own anything other than my clothes, sword and this OP shield? Who would I even _give _that to? Oh, right, ten paces. Brace for impact.

OHGODAXEMAN

Right, okay, push out with shield, get the hell out of my face. Thrust to stomach – okay, no, it's deflected.

Right, royal guard are actually competent. This...is going to suck. Oh, crap, who just bumped into my back-

"You doing alright?" Vaike grunted from behind me.

"Well, I've certainly done better." I smirked, flicking away the axeman's next swing with my shield. "How 'bout you, teach?"

"Issat a challenge?" Vaike laughed, bringing his axe down on someone that had slipped past me. "Alright, then! Let's see if you can keep up with The Vaike!"

The axeman I was fighting finally overextended on one of his swings, letting me open his stomach and turn to face Vaike. "I'm sure I can manage. What're you at?"

"Three already!" He grinned, smashing his axe down on the head of an overly plucky swordsman. "How 'bout you?"

"One so far." I mock-sighed, raising my shield to face the incoming second wave. "But I've always been a bit of a late bloomer."

Vaike let out a bark of laughter and charged forwards to meet the enemy head-on, Feroxi soldiers behind him. "Prove it, then!"

Y'know, standing and waiting for them to get here really suits my fighting style better – no? Charging? Fine. Let's go.

Oh, god, I hate charging so much – in fact, I hate fighting in general. Not a pacifist – dodge that sword, it'll take your head off – but come on, this is just barbaric.

"FOUR NOW!"

"Fuck you, Vaike!" I shouted back. What was I thinking about? Oh, right, a swordsman just tried to cut off my head. Stab to the chest. Arright, that's two, time to take out these two scared-looking mages-

"SKREE!"

Or not, I forgot that Julian is a goddamn killstealer. Holy crap, did Kylar just bite that guy in half?

I...think I'm going to be sick.

"Evening, all!" Julian smirked as Gregor jumped off and drew his broadsword, rolling his shoulders. "How are we all doing?"

"You killstealing bastard!" I shouted, pulling myself up from the ground. Stupid displaced air. "What are you doing here?"

"Robin's orders, everyone try and take out the leadership." Julian shrugged. "Thought you were in trouble, tried to save you, won't happen again."

Asshole.

"Gregor would like to point out that we are still in battle, and should probably focus." Gregor grumbled, decapitating some poor wounded bastard who tried to stand up. Right, right.

"Gotcha there, mate. Well, back up to the skies it is!" Julian grinned. "C'mon, Kylar-"

Wait, weren't all of the mages in one block when they were charging? More to the middle? What the fuck were two random mages doing here-

Oh. Oh shit.

"Trap!" I screamed, raising my shield and turning just in time to block a wave of green blades – fuck, that's not wind magic, it summons fucking razors – which almost made me fall over. Julian paled and drove his knees into Kylar's flanks, panicking-

Oh, right, wind magic is super effective against flying units. Oh, fuck, there's a wave heading in his direction now-

"NOT WHILE GREGOR STANDS!"

Holy fuckballs, those are deep cuts. Is – is he okay? Well, the mage sure as hell isn't, because he's been cut from head to fucking toe – most disgusting view of the brain ever, ugh – but Gregor's still standing tall, so he's gotta be okay, right?

"Gregor?!" Julian shouted in confusion, turning his head even as Kylar took off and started to move in the other direction. "What-?"

Gregor grinned, gave him a thumbs up, and turned to me. "Like Gregor said – while Kylar alive, Julian alive, right?"

Mother of god. "Yeah, I guess. Hey, are you okay?"

Gregor glanced down at himself, back up at me, and smiled. "Probably not, no."

"THERE'S STILL MAGES LEFT, GUYS!" Vaike yelled, rolling underneath another green scythe. Oh, crap, he's right. Okay then, let's focus.

"I'll get the two on the left, you get the three on the right?" I panted as I dodged another blast and ended up next to Vaike. Vaike glanced around, completely serious for once. It's disturbing.

"Who gets the two in the middle?" He asked, frowning. I just smirked as Gregor hauled himself to his feet and gripped his sword in both hands.

"Greg's got that, now let's move!"

Okay, I've only got to deal with two of them, it shouldn't be that hard – that's a tornado.

...

HE'S GOT A FUCKING TORNADO TOME?!

Oh god, oh god, oh god, roll out of the way – shit, there goes my sword. Crap, find a weapon, find a weapon, find a weapon – fuck it, let's just go with it. You've killed people with just the shield before anyway.

"Let's go, then!" I yelled, diving at Tornado-bastard. Heh, looks like that spell's got a pretty long casting time. Aww, he's terrified – smash his face in. Okay, he's unconscious, I can deal with him later. HOW'S IT FEEL TO BE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THA-ow

Oh, right, there's two of them. Why couldn't I notice that before the low-powered wind spell flipped me onto my back? Uh-Oh, thanks Lon'qu.

"Here." He grunted, passing me one of his spare swords. "How's everything going?"

"Please tell me you brought a healer because I'm pretty sure Gregor's about to die." I groaned, pushing myself to my feet.

"I did." He grunted, waving forwards some old balding Feroxi priest to Gregor's hunched over body. "Where's Vaike?"

"I'm here." Vaike panted, dropping down next to us. Holy crap, that's a lot of blood.

"...is that your blood, or theirs?" I asked after a few seconds. Vaike shrugged.

"Eh, half-and-half. Nothing major on my side." He glanced over to the healer crouching over Gregor. "Hey, how's he doing?"

"He's dead." The healer said bluntly, standing up and shaking his head. "Who else is wounded?"

Dead?

"You're kidding, right?" Vaike grunted, turning to him. "He's shaken off blows that shoulda killed a bear!"

"Initial damage from the arcwind lacerations would have killed a lesser man instantly." The healer shrugged as he raised his staff and pointed it at Vaike, healing his half-dozen cuts. "The secondary wind spells finally brought him down, he died of blood loss."

Vaike shook his head, scowling. "Damn."

Oh, fuck, who's going to tell Julian?

"I'll tell Julian." I sighed, turning to the healer. "Make sure that body doesn't get disturbed. We're getting him a proper burial."

Vaike kicked a stone. "Jeez, first shepherd to go down...fuckin Gangrel, huh?" He chuckled. "The Vaike's got half a mind to put an axe through his head just for that."

I sighed. "...yeah, me too."

"You might get your chance." Lon'qu said darkly, walking past us and clutching his sword. "Because here he comes."

Wait, Gangrel's here?

Oh, _fuck me._

"What do we have here?" Gangrel scowled as he stepped over the dead body of his mages. Some unseen force – fate? Drama? - had made all the Feroxi and Plegian soldiers fight well away from us, making a nice little circle for the four of us to fight in. "The little lamb, a slab of meat and a swordsman who doesn't smile. Kehaha!"

He grinned crazily as he turned to me.

"You've been particularly annoying!" He laughed, whipping his levin sword around. "D'you know how you make me feel? SICK! INSULTED! FILLED WITH ANGER!"

He narrowed his eyes and settled into a fighting stance.

"You...all of you. Clinging to each other won't save you maggots when the boot falls!" He smirked, twitching crazily. Holy fuck, he's completely lost it hasn't he? "It didn't save that loser, it won't save you!"

"Oh, that is it!" Vaike growled, throwing himself forwards. "You want some?"

"Oopsie!" Gangrel cackled, rolling away from the strike and jumping to his feet. "Brutal, I love it!"

He brought his sword up and parried Vaike's next swing, sending his axe spiralling away with a contemptuous flick of his wrist.

"You're an eyesore." He said bitterly, and brought the sword swinging up, cleaving Vaike's skull in two.

"VAIKE!"

Holy fuck, no, oh jesus it's all going wrong why is this happening we're the fucking heroes. We're the fucking heroes, and you are a goddamn piece of tra_sh in__**sane son oF A BITCH!**_

"DIE!"

I'm not even sure what I'm fucking doing, but I'm charging this asshole. He turned towards me, slight surprise in his eyes, and flicked his sword. What's that meant to do you son of a bit-AGH!

Oh, god, there's dots everywhere. Why does my chest feel like it's on fire? Ugh, I can hardly breathe. Okay, Cameron, stand up. Slowly, slowly. Where's my sword, where's my shield – there they are. Five meters away from me Okay, what's the situation?

Lon'qu and Gangrel are swordfighting, so he's distracted. Get your weapons, and put a solid two inches of steel through his fucking heart.

"Beg for your life!" Gangrel screamed, lashing out at Lon'qu, that fucking sword sending lightning bolts everywhere – THAT'S how he hurt me! - which he just managed to dodge.

"Be silent." He hissed back, raising the killing edge and settling into a fighter's stance. He narrowed his eye as Gangrel ran forwards, lashing out with another easily avoided bolt of lightning. "Predictable."

The two swords started smashing off of each other in a hypnotizing display of speed, and – WHY AM I PURPLE PROSING WHEN I COULD BE FINDING MY DAMN WEAPONS?!

Alright, there they are. About five meters away. I already had these thoughts. Stay frosty, Cameron. Stay frosty.

Grab them, you fool. Okay, so you've got your shield, and – ah, fuck, your sword's broken. Okay, find another one – there's Gregor's body. God, do I have to loot his fucking corpse?

Lon'qu let out a scream of pain. Okay, no other choice. Sorry, Gregor, I've just got to borrow your broadsword, okay?  
GOD this is heavy. Okay, whatever, I just need to get one hit in on him.

Turn around, take a step forwards, and – okay, Gangrel's standing over Lon'qu's body about to stab him in the head.

"Really? That's it?" He almost sounded disappointed. "Ah, well..."

"HEY, BASTARD!" I growled, wrapping my hand around the sword tighter. He turned, slightly puzzled, just in time for my shield to slam into his face. "KNOCK KNOCK!"

"Who's there?" He hissed, scrambling to his feet and picking up his levin sword. Lon'qu let out a groan, clutching a long red cut across his stomach. Oh, crap, are those his intestines? We need a healer, where's the feroxi one – oh, there he is, with a fucking crater where his face was. Wonderful. "Don't answer, I know who's there. A little lost lamb, in more trouble than he can handle."

"What does that make you, then?" I groaned. Okay, that lightning bolt must have done some serious damage because I can hardly breathe or stand up straight. This is stupid. "A mad wolf?"

"No, a not a wolf." Gangrel narrowed his eyes, completely serious. "I am an Angel of Vengeance, here to make Ylisse _pay_."

"Sins of the father..." I chuckled. "Blaming a country for one man."

"The country didn't stop that man." Gangrel hissed. I just shook my head.

"The country will hate you for this." I gasped through the pain, throwing my arm around dramatically. ACTING! "You think they will forget this? The attempt to kill the exalt, the burning of so many villages, a death count this high? Emmeryn may forgive Plegia, but Ylisse will never forgive, and never forget."

"Just like _I _have never forgiven." Gangrel spat, curling his claw-like hands into a fist. "I have never forgotten, and I _will _have my country's revenge!"

"...bloody pathetic." I sighed, raising my shield. "Come on, then."

Gangrel scoffed, rolled his eyes, and lashed out with his sword. The lightning bolt smashed me off my feet, although at least my shield blocked the actual impact. Shitshit, get up – AGH!

"Try not to bleed." Gangrel scoffs as he steps on the shield, pinning it to my torso. "I don't like bleeders."

Well, this is how I die then. Sorry, Anna. Julian, if you ever see Lucien, kill him for me, and try to avoid fucking up the timeline any further because it's safe to say saving Emmeryn backfired pretty hard on us.

"GANGREL!"

Oh, thank god, the cavalry's arrived. Gangrel just completely forgets about me, but it's not like I could do anything.

"Come, princling!" Gangrel laughed, kicking me away – you bastard, that hurts. Agh, can I stand up? No, no I can't.

"Lon'qu!" Someone gasped, running straight past me. Oh, hey Lissa. Yeah, Lon'qu's probably in a worse state than I am. What with the intestines. "Oh, my gods, are you okay?"

"Woman..." Lon'qu hissed, wincing. "Just...heal, okay?"

Lissa let out a sigh of relief and a small chuckle. "Well, you're fine." She said calmly before pulling out a mend staff and starting to...oh, god, she's stuffing his intestines back in him. That's disgusting. "Hold on, I'll fix you up."

"Thank you." He sighed, slumping his head backwards.

"My sister wishes for our people to know _**PEACE**_, Gangrel! But as long as you draw breath, it can never come!"

"Peace is an illusion, Princling" Gangrel taunted, settling into his own stance. "There can never be peace between Plegia and Ylisse, there is far too much hate for that!"

"So be it then." Chrom growled. "Gods, let my blade be the one that ends your miserable life. For Ylisse!"

Then they moved. Holy fuck, this is beautiful to watch. Chrom's got no clue how to use the Fire Emblem as a shield – I knew I should have given him lessons before this – but his swordsmanship's a ton better than Gangrel's. Still, Gangrel's more agile due to not wearing all of that fancy Great Lord armor. I...can't even follow this fight, it's that far above my level.

"Haha!" Gangrel cackled madly – holy crap, he's actually frothing at the mouth now. "Exeunt!"

Chrom slashed forwards, cutting across Gangrel's chest, but he didn't even notice. Instead, he smashed his head into the prince's face twice, stunning him, and then kicked his legs out from under him.

"Only a fool fights fair!" He taunted, raising his sword. "You die alone! Just like every man lives and dies – ALONE!"

"Not alone." Chrom muttered from around a mouth of blood and chipped teeth. Thank the gods a heal staff can fix that, a prince with broken teeth would never do. "You're the only one alone."

Gangrel scoffed at that. "Oh? And who's with you? Your pathetic tactician is nowhere to be seen, your sisters can't fight a damn, and there's nobody else in your army who can match me! _Who makes you not alone?!_"

"He's got me!"

Gangrel turned around, saw nothing, and then looked up just in time for Cordelia's killer lance to smash through his heart and knock him to the ground. He stared at the spear for a long second, then let out a low chuckle.

"To hell...with all of it."

He didn't laugh after that.

Cordelia jumped off of her pegasus and ran over to Chrom, hyperventilating. "Captain Chrom, are you-"

"I'm fine, Cordelia. Thanks to you." He said, pulling himself up and placing a hand on her shoulder. To her credit, she didn't faint. The dinner date probably had something to do with that. She's still blushing like a frigging lobster, though.

"Captain..."

"I hate to ruin the moment, you two, but could you maybe help?" I grunted, waving an arm. Chrom started, flushed, and grabbed my arm to pull me up. "Thanks. Agh, that sword smarts..."

"Yes it does." Chrom agreed. Lissa – having finally healed Lon'qu, who must have fallen unconscious during it – frowned at him and twisted his chin to face her.

"Aw, Chrom..." She sighed, shaking her head. "Hold still and let me fix this."

While Lissa held the point of the staff up to his mouth, Chrom frowned and looked around the battlefield.

"Ah 'ought Aike was ment ta be here." He said around a mouthful of healing teeth. Lissa nodded in satisfaction and let go. "Where is he?"

Oh, fuck, I've got to break this to him.

"...Vaike was killed by Gangrel before you arrived." I said after a couple of seconds. "He...his head was cut in two."

Chrom's eyes widened as he looked around, trying to find his body – ah, crap, they're friends aren't they? He froze as he found the pool of blood Vaike's body was lying in. God, it looks so much smaller than it did when he was alive, even with all the muscles.

"No..." He sighed, closing his eyes. "Did we lose any other shepherds?"

"Gregor." I said after a couple of seconds. "Kylar and Julian were trapped in a circle of wind mages, but Gregor took an arcwind for them so they could escape. He was killed by the next few wind blasts."

Chrom sighed and sat down, shaking. "Gods. We...we need to tell Robin." He glanced around and unhooked his cloak, walking over to Vaike. Grimacing, he picked up the severed part of his head and put it next to the rest of his body, which he covered with the cloak. "Still...we've won. I hope it was worth it."

* * *

He was telling the truth. After Gangrel's death was announced, Plegians were throwing their weapons down everywhere. The fact that Basilio and his men had finally crawled over the damn overdone landslide probably helped. We walked into the debriefing tent, panting and generally sore. God, I can't wait to sleep tonight. Normally I'd be worried about nightmares, especially after the shit I've been through today, but I'm probably just going to stop working as soon as I hit the mattress so I'll worry about the PTSD some other day. Robin glanced around the table and froze when he looked at me, before glancing away. Huh, wonder what that's about.

Eventually, Basilio walked in, supporting a limping Flavia who was clutching a small cut in her side.

"Shouldn't you get that healed?" Robin asked with a raised eyebrow, making Flavia shake her head.

"Other people have worse, I'll be fine." She said, sitting down. "What's the report?"

Robin glanced at his map and removed all of Plegia's figures. "We've won the battle and the war – this was the majority of Plegia's military strength. We won't even need to fight to reclaim our other castles, just show up and demand they leave. I don't recommend we push into Plegia."

"How are we meant to justify this war, then?" Basilio grunted, making Emmeryn shoot a...surprisingly scary glare at him.

"This war was always in defense." She said – calmly? I'm not sure I can justify that as calm. "Plegia's people have suffered enough at their own ruler's hands. I see no reason to make their problems worse."

"We won't have any other option that to take at least some of their gold from their coffers." Robin frowned, tapping the Plegian capital. "However, I expect we can receive that through diplomatic envoys rather than a show of force."

He gave a slight smile, which came off as rather forced due to how sick he looked. "I think we can congragulate ourselves – we've won."

Basilio and Flavia let out whoops of joy and left to tell the rest of the camp, just as Phila and Emmeryn excused themselves, small smiles on their faces. Chrom, Frederick and Cordelia all glanced at each other before leaving. Well, time to go find Anna.

"Cameron, a moment." Robin said quietly. Huh?

"What is it, Robin?" I asked, turning to face him. C'mon man, why won't you look at me. Robin hesitated, glancing around the tent.

"...I thought it was right that you heard it from me rather than anyone else. It was my fault, anyway." He said sadly, clenching his hands into fists. What the hell are you talking about – no. Please no. Oh god no. I couldn't take that. He forced himself to look me in the eyes, and quietly began to talk.

"At some point in the middle of the battle, Gangrel's archers fired a volley at our pegasus knights that missed. It should have overextended, and did, landing in the supply wagons at the back. By sheer random chance, one of those arrows-" He paused, closing his eyes for a second before opening them again. "One of those arrows hit Anna in the eye. She died instantly. I'm so sorry."

No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.

No.

No.

N

o

no

no

no

no

NONONONONONONONO! _**NO!NAW423LSRZFVGABRwrasdvrewaf**_

_**worthless**_

_**couldn't protect**_

_**what good am i?**_

_**WHAT GOOD ARE YOU CAMERON?!**_


	30. Chapter Twenty-Nine (Julian Prologue)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Twenty-Nine – Falling Action**

A/N: Hello. Still mad at me? GOOD, I live off my reader's tears. Anyway, increased amounts of profanity this chapter.

* * *

Aw, fuck.

"...he's not seen her yet?" I asked quietly, looking away from the body. Maribelle shook her head, all arrogance gone.

"No, he hasn't come in. He's refusing to leave the supply wagon."

"Shit." I chuckled, shaking my head. "Stupid bastard, that's not going to help him. Thanks, Maribelle."

"Mm." Maribelle nodded. "Julian, for what it's worth, I'm sorry about Gregor."

Keh.

"S'arright, Maribelle." I sighed, turning to leave. "Merc work's dangerous anyway, we knew that was going to happen eventually."

Yeah, jeez. Its like – we both lost someone important today, I think. Puts everything into perspective, right? You know, that we've been making people feel the same pain we're feeling right now?

Damn, Cameron's gonna be pissed if I tell him that to his face. Still, I can't just leave him in there, it's not healthy. Arright, there's the supply wagon. Crap, he's locked the doors.

"Cameron, it's me. Open up."

"Go away, Julian."

"Not likely, now open the door before I make Kylar break them down."

"_Piss off, Julian!_" Wow, it sounds like his throat's really dry. Arright then, that makes this an intervention.

"Fair enough. Bird?" I said, stepping to the side and letting the Griffon smash his beak through the door. "Thank you. Make sure nobody comes in after me, arright?"

"Skree!"

"Cheers." I nodded, stepping inside. "Ah, gods mate, you're a mess."

No kidding, he's curled up in a corner clutching some stupid glass charm and sobbing to himself.

"...what do you want, Julian?" He asked after a second.

"Just checking up on my friend." I shrugged, sitting down next to him. Cameron let out a bitter laugh before showing me the charm. "Where'd you get an Eye of Isha?"

"Anna got it as part of some deal she made on our first date." Cameron chuckled. "...only date now, I guess. She told me it'd keep me safe. Wasn't me that bloody needed it, was it?"

"I'm not gonna say I understand what you're going through." I said after a few seconds. "Just...just remember you aren't the only one grieving, arright?"

Cameron glanced at the charm one last time before tucking it back down his tunic, blinking away more tears. "Yeah, I know. It's just...god, I don't even _know_, you know?" He said quietly. "You know what I keep coming back to? If we hadn't saved Emm, it'd have just been the Royal Guard we'd have had to deal with. No archers."

"For fucks sake, Cameron, don't go into the what-ifs." I sighed. He's got a point – maybe if we'd sticked to the timeline, like he was planning to, Anna and Vaike and Gregor would still be alive – wait, that would make it my fault. "But if you do, then blame me, not yourself. I was the idiot who started this chain of events, remember?"

Cameron glanced up at me with red eyes.

"Julian...get out."

NOT the right thing to say.

"Look, mate, I'm sorry, but that was the right choice to make-" ALSO not the right thing to say. Cameron rose to his feet and grabbed a sword from the racks along the side, pointing it at my throat.

"Get out, you bastard. I don't want to see your fucking face again, do you hear me?"

Holy shit. Okay, he can't be serious. This is just the grief talking, try to talk hm out of it.

"Cameron, you're overreacting here-"

"GET OUT, JULIAN!"

Holy shit, he's actually attacking me. Not well, because fuck if he can see through all those tears, but that was intent to kill.

"Arright, arright..." I said quietly, stepping outside. Good job, Julian, you just stepped in it. Maybe he'll talk to you later, when he's not pissed off to such a level. "...I'll talk to you later."

"Just leave, Julian."

* * *

Well, fuck, it's been a day, let's try this again. Hell of a lot can change in twenty-four hours. This isn't a bombshell I'm looking forward to dropping, but it's necessary.

"Cameron-"

"If you come in here, Julian, I will kill you."

Well, that's not going to change. "Cameron, this is important timeline bullshit."

"I don't care, Julian. Leave me alone." He said sulkily. Oh, great, he's completely self-absorbed in his bullshit.

"Cameron, Flavia's dead."

Few seconds of stunned silence, thumping feet, swish the curtains aside – hey, mate.

"WHAT?!"

"Remember that flesh wound of hers? Yeah, the dagger was poisoned." I sighed. "Some kinda delayed thing, stopped her heart in the night."

"...fuck." Cameron whispered, leaning against a pole. "That's it, then. We've lost." He started to chuckle bitterly. "Lost the person I care about, now we can't even beat the game. Shame, really, I kinda wanted to see how it ended."

"...want a drink?" I asked, offering him my flask. Cameron stared at it in disgust before snorting.

"I don't drink, Julian. I'm not that far fucking gone."

Well, he's still in that pile of self-pity then. That's good news.

"Suits me fine." I shrugged, taking a swing. Aah, that's the good stuff. "...about yesterday."

"I'm not going to kill you, Julian." Cameron said after a second, rubbing his eyes. "But I'm...in kind of a dark place right now."

"No fuckin' shit. Half the army is." I grumbled, emptying my flask. "I'll see you tomorrow, then?"

"...maybe." Cameron said quietly. "Maybe."

* * *

"Julian." Tom said quietly as I woke up in the blue room. "It's been a while."

"Hey, old man." I sighed, sitting up and rubbing my neck. "Talked to Cameron?"

"I tried. He stabbed me." Tom said, taking a pull of whatever spirit gods drink. "Look, it's not my fault, okay? I'm not omniscient, this wasn't some kind of...balance for Emmeryn or whatever. Gregor made a choice."

"...yeah, Gregor made a choice and Vaike was stupid." I chuckled. "I got that part. It's Anna I don't understand."

Tom rose from his chair and stalked through the room, shoulders slumped "There's limits even to our power, Julian. Nobody can effect random chance, not on that scale."

"Such a minuscule thing can't be changed?" I snorted. "Nudge the flight path a little? Dammit, man, you've probably broken your best weapon's mind because of it."

"I consider Cameron far more than a weapon. I'd like to count him as a friend." Tom said harshly, lashing out at...something, and staring at an opened book that wasn't there a second ago. "Losing people is hard, especially through chance. The little things...are hard to change. They're hard to see coming. They're hard to nudge, because nudge it too much and a thousand other things change."

"You're saying Anna's death was insignificant?" I chuckled. "Seems pretty fucking significant from my angle."

"Anna's death was, the arrow's flight path wasn't." Tom said bitterly. "Messing with reality is complicated. It's far easier to do big things than small ones. Intervening in one fight is almost impossible, but introducing new factors to the world is incredibly easy."

I sighed and glanced around the room, which seemed darker than it was before, almost a navy instead of the usual air-blue.

"I don't pretend to understand how it works." I shrugged. "But...maybe you should just tell Cameron you're sorry, or understand what he's going through, or fucking something."

"I did." Tom said quietly. "I once felt a similar feeling...except so much worse. Because I had to see the one I left live with it too."

* * *

The next day, and the cart's empty.

"Aw, shit."

For the love of Christ, if he's killed himself, I'm going to make Tom send me back in time to slap him. If that's even a thing he can do. What did he say, introducing new factors was easier or something?

Oh, wait, there's a note.

_Julian_

_I'm not staying for the victory parade, for the funeral, or anything. This isn't a suicide note, I'm just leaving. _

_I would stay for the funeral, I would look at her body, but I saw Gregor and Vaike after they died. They looked so much...smaller. I don't want to remember her that way, and when they bury her, when her family comes...they all look like her, Julian. How am I meant to deal with that? Not only did I fail to fucking protect their baby sister – and she WAS the youngest, I checked up on that much – they all look exactly the same. I'll end up seeing like, ten Annas, all staring at me with disappointment or anger or fucking pity._

_I can't, okay? I just can't._

_I don't know where I'll go, just...not here. Probably to some islands, then maybe Valm and join Say'ri's resistance or some shit like that. If Chrom and Cordelia do get married, send me an invite. I'll stay in touch._

_Your friend,_

_Cameron_

Well, good luck I suppose. You'll need it.

"Julian?" Donnel asked from outside, hesitating. "Where's Cameron?"

"...he's gone." I said quietly. "We'll see him again at some point, but right now I guess he just needed space."

"Alright." Donnel nodded. Holy crap, he looks old. That's disturbing, he's like sixteen but he looks so OLD. "...lunch is almost ready."

Donnel walked away quietly. Food, food sounds like a good idea.

Maybe eating will get my mind off the fact that he just wandered off with a minimal amount of gear in the middle of the night...wait, where's Anna's money stash? It's in a huge bag in here – heh.

Flip the note over.

_PS: Anna's will – it's on Robin's desk now, I had Gaius put it there before I left – said I got half her stash, and to 'not spend it all at once'. The other half's still there, just in a smaller bag. She wants it to go to her family. Make sure it gets there, will you?_

_Gods, even beyond the grave she's still keeping tabs on her money._

Heh, that's Anna for you. Wow, this wagon feels empty.

"You comin', Julian?"

"Just a sec, Donnel!" I called out, glancing around. So...empty. "...bye, Anna. See you later, Cameron."

I stepped outside and grinned at Kylar, who was sitting there grooming himself.

"C'mon, bird. Looks like it's our job to keep Chrom outta trouble for a few years."

"Skree!"

"Yeah, you said it."

* * *

A/N: Hallo! Okay, so like lambentLodestar said, my thumb's broken (Bike crash) bringing my WPM down. So I decided to go for shorter chapters at the same pace rather than stretch out the delays until it's healed, so...three months of shorter chapters. If you don't like this and want the 3000~word chapters back, drop a review. Anyway, there's the first of the other POV characters for Timeskip-onwards. There's going to be a total of five, with the 'screentime' divided thusly:

-Cameron

-Julian

-N2

-N3

-N4

-N5

N2 will have his 'prologue' next chapter. After that, they'll show up over the course of the Timeskip. It's going to be so much fun.

No fear, Cameron's still going to have things to do, just secluded and far from the rest for a while as he gets his life in order.

One last thing: Chapter 28 got a grand total of 55 reviews, not counting lament dropping a line to inform you of my injury. Uhm. Wow. Thank you all so much, I honestly didn't anticipate getting THAT strong of a reaction for a mediocre self-insert.  
Dammit, now I'm under pressure to keep up that kind of quality. Blast.


	31. Chapter Thirty (Mal Prologue)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Thirty – Legacy**

A/N: Or, Gone2Ground indulges in his Firefly obsession.

You might hate me more for this.

* * *

"Thank you for lending your services." Say'ri said gratefully, leaning against the rail of the ship. "If you had not been here to help us escape, I fear Lord Lelldorallen's men would have been annihilated."

"You guessed right." I said to myself, fluffing up my hat before raising my voice "Well, it wouldn't do to leave good folks like you hanging. Never did hold much to Walhart's ideals, myself."

"Your accent, it is...strange. Are you from across the water?" She asked curiously. Grinning, I looked out over the waves.

"Bit further out than that, but kind of." I shrugged, turning away. "All that said, welcome to the Serenity, princess. Any port in particular you'd like to go calling in?"

Say'ri shook her head and followed me. "Nae, although I don't believe we can remain in Roseanne for the time being."

"More likely than not." I agreed, walking up to the wheel. "Alright, then, keep us steady there Inigo."

"It's harder than it looks." Inigo grunted, his white hair dripping with sweat as he tried to keep us on course. "Can't you take it back?"

"I'm sorry, I thought you wanted to impress the ladies!" I smirked, patting him on the shoulder. "Just take us down the coast. That's the sun on our left shoulder at this time of day."

"It's too early to be doing this." Inigo groaned. "This was the life you wanted? Really?"

"It's better than chasing after girls all your life." I shot back with a smile. "Besides, at least my dream is coming true. What's your track record so far?"  
Inigo chose not to respond.

"So this truly is your ship?" Say'ri asked in wonder, glancing around. "How could you begin to afford a vessel at such a young age?"

"I'm sorry, last time I checked twenty was NOT young." I grumbled, tilting my hat down to cover my eyes as I glanced at the sun. "Also, it's a pretty small ship."

"Large enough for our purposes." Say'ri nodded, before flushing. "I'm sorry, I forgot that you are not necessarily part of the revolution."

"We might as well be, this is the third time this month we've bailed out some resistance cell or something." I shrugged. "Not anything as impressive as Lord Lelldorallen's force, but I'm sure we're beginning to annoy Walhart quite a bit."

Say'ri glanced at me in surprise. "Other cells? Who?"

"Well, there was that small group of four that Brady found half-dead floating on some timber, so I don't know if they count. Claimed to be messengers of some kind, we let them go when we reached Port Sargoth. Then there was those Wyvern Riders that needed a break, so we let them land and resupply." I frowned. "...actually, this is the first time we've actively decided to slap Walhart in the face. Still felt pretty good, though."

Inigo chuckled and nodded in agreement. "Felt fantastic." He paused briefly, then sighed. "...if Owain or Cynthia were here, they'd chime in with something along the lines of-"

Oh, that's my cue.

"-FEAR NOT, WE ARE TRUE CHAMPIONS OF JUSTICE!" I said with a flourish, bowing deeply and letting my hair flutter all over the place. I should probably get a haircut, this is going to get in my eyes one day. Inigo groaned and slammed his head into the wheel.

"...that, yes."

"WALHART'S FORCES SHALL NEVER CAUSE OUR HEARTS TO TREMBLE!"

"You can stop now, Mal." Inigo said, rubbing his temples and wincing.

"REFER TO ME AS CAPTAIN, HELMSMAN!"

"Oh my gods, you're even worse than Owain sometimes." A voice grouched from behind me. Oooh...crap.

"Good morning, Severa." I said, smile frozen. I could feel the killing intent. "How are you today?"

"Malcom Yriel..." Severa growled, finishing her second twintail. "...would you mind explaining exactly why a large group of boasting Roseanneans were running down the halls towards the barracks and waking me up?"

Full name. Crap.

"We rescued them..." I chuckled weakly. "...how'd you sleep?"

"Not very well at all, thank you." She said bitterly, pushing past me to talk to Say'ri. "...Princess."

Say'ri, to her credit, recovered remarkably well. "Lady Severa, was it?" She bowed formally, smiling. "I take it you are in command, then?"

Severa sniffed. "Of a kind. It's Malcom's boat, but I make the calls. Speaking of which..."

"I wasn't going to leave them to die, Severa." I grumbled, taking the wheel from Inigo so he could escape without her noticing he was there. "What was I supposed to do?"

"Make them a little more quiet, perhaps?" The girl huffed, sitting down against the railings. Wow, she's irritating sometimes.

"Well excuuuuuuse me princess." I rolled my eyes, turning back to the ocean. "Why don't you get some food, mingle a little. It'd do you some good."

Severa snorted. "Oh, please. Look at this, we can't even see the shore, where are you taking us?"

"We'll see the shore in a bit." I murmered, craning my neck to the side and frowning slightly. "The shoreline's dipped in a little here, it grows out again later."

Severa sighed. "Oh, very well."

"You do not appear to trust your captain's skills very much." Say'ri commented with a small frown. Severa snorted and looked away, flushing.

"I trust him, thank you very much." She snapped. "He can get a little...overconfident, sometimes."

"Thank you for that ringing endorsement, Severa."

A few minutes of comfortable silence passed, argument abated, before Say'ri asked one last question.

"You never did tell me...who are you that you can afford a vessel of your own at such an age?"

Smirking, I turned to her.

"Just a simple merchant's son, ma'am."

* * *

"At which point." The lord said, grinning from ear to ear, "I delivered my rebuttal most excellent to the Dog of Walhart's face!"

This is an interesting conversation I've stumbled in on. Lord Lelldorallen – a tall man with pale blue hair, sort of like Virion's but shorter and with the most magnificent mustache I have ever seen. I guess this must have been what he said immediately before Cervantes attacked and – in the original timeline – completely wiped him out. Rumors talked of an impressive speech, never heard it though. This should be-

"My lord, I find thy face apelike and thy form misshapen. Thy beard, moreover, is an offense against decency, resembling more closely the scabrous fur which doth decorate the hinder portion of a mongrel dog than a proper adornment for a human face. Is it possible that thy mother, seized by some wild lechery, did dally at some time past with a randy goat?"

-oh my gods its more perfect than I could have ever imagined. His troops cheered and nodded in agreement, clanging flasks of something together.

"Laurent, did you let them into the wine?" I asked the black-haired mage in the corner. Laurent glanced up at me, frowning, before looking back at his book.

"No, I assume this is from their own personal stock." He said with a frown. "Unfortunately."

"Unfortunately." I nodded in agreement, completely deadpan. "Well, how goes the meteorology studying?"

"Fairly well. I do believe I may be able to predict the weather fairly soon, although it never hurts to double-check." He nodded enthusiastically. "It's an amazingly interesting subject – the idea of so much force being behind even a simple breeze is-"

"Calm down, Laurent." I chuckled, clapping him on the shoulder. "All I need to know is when it rains, when it storms, and when not to taunt mother nature."

Laurent nodded sheepishly, turning back to his book. "Yes, quite right. Oh, and Mal?"

I turned back to him, similing. "Yeah, Laurent?"

"I think Brady was looking for you earlier. Something about the state of the wounded we brought aboard."

Oh, wonderful.

* * *

"We need more healers." Brady grumbled. "I can't keep up with this pace for much longer, boss. I'm gonna collapse."

"We don't have more healers, Brady" I pointed out. "You're the only one we have, and the Roseanneans don't even have a field medic."

"What a stupid idea." Brady muttered to himself, holding a heal staff over one of his ten patient's chests. "If we even had a better set o' staffs, I could do it mahself."

"I'll try to pick some up at the next port." I shrugged. "But let's face it, we're low on supplies in general. I'm starting to think this was a bad move."

"Hell nah." Brady grunted, checking an unconscious archer's breathing. "Gud, still there. Anyway, we did a good thing, Mal. Stop beatin' yourself over the head with it."

I sighed and turned to leave. "Lucina probably could have come up with a better plan."

"Lucina's a special case." Brady chuckled, running a hand through his orange hair to try and get it to stay sticking up. "You're doin' a good job, Mal."

"Thanks, Brady. Good luck with the patients." I muttered softly before leaving.

"Don't wish me luck, get me a helper or better gear!" He called out after me.

* * *

"...Noire? Is everything alright?" I asked, ducking into the kitchen. She said she was going to try baking something, but the ship's probably not stable enough to do that, never mind the lack of the oven...ooh, wonder if she's taking Dad's 'Pancakes' a little too seriously and thinking they really are cakes in a pan-

"BLOOD AND THUNDER!"

I immediately regret this decision.

"BLASTED CONTRAPTION! YOU WILL RUE THE DAY YOU DECIDED TO MESS WITH ME!"

_This is why I hate blondes._

"Will you please calm down?" I asked, raising my hands as Noire just repeatedly slammed the cooker with her ladle.

The wooden ladle. That was now on fire.

On a wooden ship.

"FUCK!"

I dived for her, wrestling the ladle out of her hands and stuffing it into a barrel of water with a sigh. Then arg burgle - GODS, NOIRE!

"Oh...sorry!" Noire squeaked, jumping away and letting me pull my head out of the water barrel. Ah, crap, my hair's all wet. "I didn't realize - "

"Maybe that's enough baking for today, yeah?" I said with a smile, ringing out my ponytail. "...and maybe you should get some rest."

Noire nodded glumly, walking away. Ah, crap, I've traded berzerker mode Noire for depressed Noire. Just wonderful.

For a priest's daughter, she's not exactly very good at remaining all dignified.

* * *

Say'ri nodded in thanks for our services as Lelldorallen and his men left the ship.

"This week has truly made me regain faith in the outside world." Say'ri said with a smile and a slight bow. "I thank you for your hospitality."

"Ma'am, you can thank us by getting rid of Walhart." I grinned, grabbing her hand and shaking it vigorously. Ha, take that boringly strict Chon'sin customs "Speaking of, if you ever need transport, check to see if we're in port, would you? Always glad to help."

Say'ri smiled, still a little shaken from my blatant disregard for her customs, and handed over a small sack of gold. "Compensation for the expenses you must have paid taking care of us, Captain. I fear it is not enough-"

"It'll do, Princess." I smiled, tossing it into the air. Nice and heavy – guess there's some of my mother in me after all. "Good hunting."

"Fair winds, traveler." She bowed one last time – eyes flickering with irritation when I did the same this time – and walked away from the ship. Sighing, I turned to face my so-called 'friends'.

"Don't get too excited." I started. "We've got cash and we're in port, but we're restocking and getting the hell out of here-"

"MAL." Severa hissed. Ah, crap.

"...fine, princess." I grumbled. "We've got two days shore leave, make the most of it."

Severa gave me one of those very rare smiles – gods, she actually looks pretty doing one of those – and walked away, cobalt hair fluttering behind her. Please, tell me she had the common sense to hide her mark...

"You are so whipped it's unbelievable." Inigo said in disbelief.

"Oh, shut up Inigo." I snorted. "If I find any women I don't know on my ship at any point in time I'm letting Noire castrate you."

"Aye-aye, captain." Inigo said glumly before walking towards what looked like a rack of swords – then doing a sharp 90 degree turn when the first thing wearing a skirt crossed his vision.

Well, I'm going to have to tell Noire to sharpen her hexing knife.

"E-excuse me..." Noire started, fingers tightening around her bow. I glanced towards her and smiled, nodding.

"Don't worry, Noire. Enjoy yourself, alright?"

Noire smiled and walked away, Laurent following her under some pretext of trying to find more tomes. Actually, knowing him it's not a pretext and is his actual motivation. I've been spending too much time with Inigo.

"Looks like we're holding the fort, Brady." I sighed, turning to the cleric – no, wait, he's over there playing his violin and getting more admirers than Inigo could ever hope for. Looks like I'm watching the ship myself, then.

Plopping down in front of the gangplank, I tilted my hat forwards to cover my eyes and lay back, drifting off to yet another fitful sleep.

* * *

_"Good luck, Princess." I smirked as she stepped through the portal. "See you on the other side?"_

_Lucina glared at me before nodding slightly. Is that a smile I see? "...try not to die, Mal. Good luck, everyone."_

_"Why does everyone assume I'm going to die?" I asked the giant portal as the others dived through. Smirking, I turned to face Aunt Anna._

_"You sure you don't want to come with us? You're going to die here, you know." I said conversationally. Anna shook her head and smiled sadly, reaching for her sword._

_"I'm going to try and keep the Risen back, prevent them from entering the timestream." She said, before tossing me a pouch of gold. "This was your mother's. Buy yourself a ship, Mal. Live that dream of yours."_

_She paused for a second, then chuckled._

_"I never knew I'd end up here when I took him up on the offer." We both knew who she was talking about. "I'm willing to bet he planned on this happening all along. Maybe you're meant to do something great with your ship."  
"More likely Lucina that's important." I snorted, turning around. "...good luck, Aunt Anna."_

_"Good luck, Malcom." She whispered. I tilted my hat in respect before leaving, gripping my spear tightly. "Okay...no turning back."_

_I heard Aunt Anna's shrill cry mix with the roar of countless risen just before my foot crossed the barrier, and I was whisked away-_

* * *

"You are here." A voice grunted as something nudged at my coat, waking me up. "You need to make the ship more obvious."

"If it was obvious, every bounty hunter in Valm would have swarmed me by now." I grinned, tilting my hat up. "Hey, Gerome."

Gerome snorted and led Minerva up the gangplank. "I've only been gone two weeks. What could you do that would make bounty hunters chase you?"

"We might have done a teeny bit of interfering with the timeline and saving a small group of rebels from certain death at the Roseanne Fields." I shrugged, following him. Gerome stopped and glanced at me – probably glaring, can't tell for the mask.

"Fate won't change."

"Oh lighten up, it can and it will." I waved a hand at him, unlocking the hatch on the main deck so Minerva could nest and get some sleep. "Besides, at least we'll get to see your parents again."

"Those people would not be my parents." Gerome growled, softly rubbing Minerva's head as the old wyvern drifted off to sleep.

"Speak for yourself, Gerome." I grinned, turning out to the sea – and Ylisse. "I can't wait to see Mum again."

* * *

A/N: Not quite 3000 of content, but getting there. Anyway, POV characters that have been revealed:

-Cameron

-Julian

-N2

-Mal

-N4

-N5

Quick rundown on who from Gen2 is on the ship:

Malcom 'Mal' Yriel (Anna and Cameron's son)

Brady

Severa

Gerome

Noire

Inigo

Apologies for the Firefly references...but I'd totally name my son Malcom if any prospective wives would let me. Next chapter it's back to good ol' me for some angst and the snapping-out thereof. It'll probably be kinda long, and is the last official chapter of the Plegia arc. After that, it's into the Timeskip full steam.


	32. Chapter Thirty-One (Cam XXIX)

**cASLEEP**

**Chapter Thirty-One – Coping**

A/N: Or, Gone2Ground gets the depressing stuff out of the way for the most part. For those wondering about 'how did Mal find the kids' or 'wait how is Mal a thing' or even '*Insert question here*', odds are it's going to be explained in a chapter titled 'Reunion', which is a while down the road yet.

* * *

This is an irritating interruption. Here I am, just trying to find passage the hell off of this continent, finding a merchant who's selling supplies rather cheaply, and we've got a bunch of bandits standing around trying to rob the place.

Honestly, I'm starting to want to get involved. But if I get violent right now, I honestly don't think I'd be able to stop myself. I've been wanting to just fucking stab _something _for weeks now.

"Hand it over!" The bandit barked as he hassled the poor merchant, raising his axe threatningly. "I fought in the war against Plegia, you think I wouldn't do it?"

Seriously? The war's been over two weeks. Word spreads quickly...assholes take advantage faster.

"I'm telling you, we don't have that much money!" The merchant cowered, quivering. He squeaked as the axe slammed down next to his head.

"Well, who does?" The bandit demanded, leaning over him.

"Oh, we do." A woman simpered from behind him.

"Not like you're going to be getting any, though." A second one smirked from his other side.

Wait, that voice is familiar. So is that hair.

f

**u**

_c_

K ME!

Time to leave. One of the two Merchant Anna's smirked triumphantly as she stood over the bandit's now unconcious corpse, before waving at her sister.

"Got him!"

"Great! That'll teach him!" She high-fived her twin before clapping the merchant on the shoulder. "We'll need water for a week, please."

You know what? I'll get supplies somewhere else. Time. To. Go. Christ, just looking at them hurts. Okay, recap – I'm outside. I was going to buy some supplies and then transport to some island, but it looks like I'm going to have to deal with buying the supplies from the ship.

Fun, that's going to be expensive.

"Transport to Port Yalen in the Celician Islands!" A muscled man with a frankly _magnificent_ beard called from next to his ship. "Anyone with a pressing need to go to the middle of nowhere?"

Sounds attractive.

"...count me in." I smiled, dropping a small sack of gold in his palm. "...oh, and I'll double it if we leave now."

"Trouble with the law, is it?" The man asked with narrowed eyes. "I'm telling you now, we aren't pirates."

"No...family issues. Please?" I begged, clasping my hands together. I have to get the hell out of dodge before they find me.

The man appeared to take pity on me and nodded. I sighed in relief, dropping another sack of gold into his hand which he tossed into the air with a smile. "Alright, guys! We're out of here!"

The crew roared in assent as we walked up the gangplank, the man juggling the bags of gold I'd given him. Good, we're almost gone-

"STOP!"

Oh, Christ. They saw me.

"They the ones you trying to avoid?" The man chuckled, pulling the gangplank away before Merchant Anna Number Who-Gives-A-Fuck could intercept us.

"Yeah...can we go?" I asked, turning away. I really don't want a good look at her right now, I'm not ready for that.

"YOU _BASTARD_! YOU _COWARD_!" Merchant Anna screamed at me as the ship pulled out of port. "IT'S YOUR FAULT!"

I'm aware of that, psycho bitch.

"What's that story?" The man asked once we were out of port and onto the open water. I sighed and shook my head.

"Not one I'd care to repeat." I said quietly after a second, staring at the planks making up the floor.

"Guess I can't comment. Pretty chequered past myself." He nodded soberly. "Th'names Captain Darkie. My mob and I'll drop you off at Port Yale, on a nice small island in the middle of nowhere. Guess you can hide out there."

"Thanks, Captain. Dormitories are...?" I asked through the lump in my throat, avoiding eye contact.

"Downstairs, on your left. Sorry if they stink." Darkie grinned, lighting a cigar. "We're not exactly a high-class vessel."

* * *

"Go away, Tom."

Tom sat across from me on a couch and gestured for me to sit down. "You can't leave this room until I let you or someone else wakes you up. Sit down."

Groaning, I sat down on my own couch and put my legs up on the table. "So, what, is this some kind of pep-talk that's meant to make me magically feel better?"

"It's meant to make sure you still function." Tom said seriously. "What's your plan?"

I sighed and lay back, rubbing my face with one hand. "To not die."

"Fair enough." Tom snorted, opening a bottle of some blue alcohol – you can tell from the smell, god that's vile - and taking a swig. "How do you plan to change the world?"

"Tom, Flavia's dead." I snorted. "She was at the very least a _little _integral. So, let me guess – Basilio is now High Khan or whatever the fuck it's called."

"Yep, and it's Khan Regent." Tom nodded lazily, staring at me. "So...what's your plan?"

I pause, looking into the endless blue void. What _was _I going to do, other than not die? I'd told Julian I'm off to fuck with Walhart, which seems like a plan, but world-changing? I don't even know.

I am certain of one thing.

"I'm going to deal with my responsibility, and from then on we'll see what happens." I said after a few seconds, lying down.

"Responsibility?"

"I've got one year left, and I don't know what kind of rampage he's been going on." I said with a small grin. "I'm going to kill Lucien."

Tom practically fell out of his chair. "THAT'S IT?!"

"Yeah." I asked with a frown. "...wasn't that kind of a bygone conclusion?"

"You're just throwing yourself out there with no plan?!" Tom yelped, a panicked look in his eyes. I just shrugged and lay back on the sofa-turned-recliner chair and sighed.

"Last time I planned something out..." I winced. "...you know what happened."

Tom regained his composure and started pacing around me. "One failure-"

"-is too fucking much." I sighed, standing up. "Let me out."

"I'm not letting you out." Tom growled. "Not until we deal with this."

Oh we're not fucking talking about it.

"I'm not talking about it, Tom." I hissed, turning to face him. Clever bastard's stripped me of all my weapons.

"Oh we're talking about it." Tom said bluntly. "Get over it, Cameron, it's just pure bad luck-"

Interesting. My fist appears to be covered in blood and spittle. Tom stumbled back up to his feet, a shocked look on his face as he massaged his jaw. He blanched and turned away from me as his face began to change.

"The hell was that?" He demanded, rubbing his jaw. Why won't he look at me? Wait, why is his hair red now?

Okay, no, it's long and white again. The fuck was that?

"No, seriously, the hell was that?!" Tom growled, turning to face me. "All I said was the truth. Get fucking over it, Cameron. I'm not telling you to go find someone else to marry, just get over it so you can bloody function in real life."

I narrowed my eyes at him and took one step forwards, growling. "Shut up, Tom."

"Hell, if it wasn't for your sense of 'responsibility' regarding Lucien I'd say you just want to throw yourself off a cliff and see if it finally kills you-"

"THAT'S BECAUSE I DO!"

I panted and ran a hand through my hair, forcing back tears. "For Christs sakes, Tom, I wasn't there for her last moments. I...I at least owed her that much." I gasped and fell to my knees. "Why?!"

Tom stood there quietly for several seconds, as the room filled with complete silence. "...because some things are just so unlikely, nothing can prevent them." He said finally, a biting tone in his+ voice.

"It's not fair." I mumbled through the tears, clutching my chest and sucking in one long breath. "It isn't fair."

"No, it's not." Tom said gently, kneeling down next to me. "I could tell you it gets better, but from my experience the grief never goes away. It'll nest there for the rest of your life, and you never truly get used to it – but you can overcome it."

I glanced around the blue room, blinking away tears. "I...think I'd like to leave now, Tom."

Tom paused, probably thinking about protesting, before nodding solemnly. "Perhaps that might be best." He said quietly, then grinned and pulled out a pair of decks. "Sure you don't want a little game of magic first?"

Fuck it, what do I have to lose?

"Why not." I sighed, sitting across from him as the table appeared and taking the offered deck. Wow, that's a lot of cards. "Commander?" Wow, that's a stupid name. Damn you, wizards, why couldn't you have just called your official release Elder Dragon Highlander like everyone else was already doing?

"Yup. I actually find it really fun, play with Old Hubba and his other minion's occasionally." Tom nodded, shuffling his deck. "My general's Uril the Mistwalker. I gave you a precon, but if you-"

"I remember my EDH deck." I smirked, watching the cards shift into battered brown sleeves. I plucked the single blue-sleeved card off the top of my deck, grinning. "Rafiq of the Many."

"Interesting choice." Tom nodded. "You know what? Let's not talk about anything, let's just play."

"Play a while and forget the world exists..." I murmered, drawing my first seven cards. "I'll start."

"By all means."

* * *

I slowly blinked awake as the ship rocked again. Let's see here – the room's dark, lit by a random candle that's almost completely gone, no windows, one bed that's made of particularly pointy and stale straw – this hurts to lie on, _wow – _no pillow, and all my belongings thrown into a barrel in the corner. Well, might as well throw on some clothes and go for a wander on deck, then.

Oh, cool, it is daytime. Technically. Well, the sun's starting to rise so it still counts.

"Couldn't sleep?" Darkie called from the wheel, handing it over to one of his crewmen and nodding at me.

"I slept fine." Liar. "I've always been an early riser." Truth, but not by choice. Damn my old college schedule, damn it to hell.

Darkie chuckled and looked out over the ocean. "Beautiful, isn't it?"  
"Looks more dangerous to me." I sighed, looking over the side of the ship. Back when we lived in France, we used to get a ferry up to Edinburgh to go visit my grandparents over Christmas. I always did like riding on the ferry, I could run back and forth along the side breathing in the nice sea air – I wish I was six again.

"Oh, it is." Darkie laughed boisterously, slapping me on the back and almost sending me overboard. "What beautiful thing isn't? The ocean, a good sword, women..."

Despite myself, I started to smile as well. "Yeah, it seems like the two go hand in hand." I craned my neck over the side and frowned. "...how long do you think it'd take to get to the bottom if I jumped?"

Darkie frowned and scratched his massive black beard. "You'd never get there. Either something would eat you, you'd drown, or you'd be crushed by the pressure. None of them are nice ways to go."

"I'm aware." I chuckled. "If I wanted to go out, I'd want to go out the clean way."

"Sword to the stomach, that's how my daddy left." Darkie mused. "He couldn't take the debt any more."

"That's horrible!" I gasped, standing up. "Gods, I'm so sorry for bringing that up-"

"Don't worry about it." Darkie waved a hand. "The debt was because he was a drunkard, and we'd already left him by then. Actually, come to think of it, it might have been our fault he killed himself. Thought he'd failed us – which he had."

We lasped into temporary silence as Darkie glared out over the sea, drumming his fingers on the side of the ship.

"I've stayed up so many nights thinking that if I'd have done something different he might still be here." He said after a second. "But every time I think that...it doesn't help. I just accepted it and moved on."

Same advice as Tom, different phrasing. I sighed and bowed my head – acceptance, huh? Stop doubting myself?

I...might be able to do that. Gods, I owe it to her to try – no, I don't owe it to her. I owe it to myself to try, and I owe it to her to never forget about her.

Stop thinking her. Turning her into an object won't let you deal with it.

Let's rephrase that. I owe it to myself to try and accept it, and I owe it to Anna to never forget her. That's better.

"Nice necklace." Darkie said after a second, nodding towards the charm dangling around my neck. "Where'd you get it?"  
I glanced down and sighed, shoving it back inside my tunic. "...from my fiance. She's dead now."

"Damn shame." Darkie grunted, turning to walk away. "Sorry for your loss-"

A blinding blue flash filled my vision and the ship suddenly rocked to the side as massive waves slammed into us, spinning us around. Darkie grunted as he fell to his knees and grabbed his crewman, who had dropped screaming out of the crow's nest, before he could plummet into the ocean.

"The gods was that?!" He grumbled as the ship flopped from its side back onto its belly. "Was that a rogue wave?! Billy, were you not doing your job right?"  
The crewman – Billy, apparently – blubbered incoherently as he scrambled to his feet, clutching his chest.

"I-I dunno, captain! It came out of nowhere!"

The entire crew was on deck now, checking nobody was hurt. Seriously, what the hell was with that blue flash? I glanced out over the waves, and – why is there a redhead floating there?

...Anna?

"MAN OVERBOARD!" I screamed, pointing. Darkie followed my gaze and his eyes widened in alarm.

"What? How'd she get there?" He frowned, before barking orders at his crew. The unconcious woman flopped around in the waves, a long green sleeveless coat flapping around her. I grabbed a rope and lowered myself off of the ship, grabbing her arm and pulling her up.

Anna? Is it you?

...no, no she's too short. Hair's too dark as well. I...dammit, Cameron, what did you expect? Darkie and his men hauled us aboard, where he frowned at her. Suddenly, the girl gasped awake and lunged for me.

"Wh-where am I?" She demanded, eyes wide and panicked. Well...

"You're on a ship about a day's sail from Ylisse." Darkie grunted. "How'd you end up in the middle of the ocean?"  
The girl stared at him for a solid two seconds before answering.

"Well, okay then..."

Wait, confusion when confronted with Ylisse, blue flash, middle of the fucking ocean – oh, god damn it Tom. ANOTHER ONE?! SERIOUSLY!?

* * *

A/N: I...honestly thought this would be longer when I planned it out. Huh. Still, 2500 words of content isn't bad when you're writing with a broken thumb, right guys?

...right? *Begs approval*

Anyway a huge thank you to lhklan The Unpronounceable for giving me a TVTropes page. And a massive 'nyeh hah' to lambentLodestar because I GOT ONE FIRST!

Kidding.

Next time, another POV character introduced. An actual canon one this time. Excited~


	33. Chapter Thirty-Two (Julian I)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Thirty-Two – Engaging Concerns**

A/N: Well, this was _meant_ to be a Chrom-POV chapter. But over the course of the last fortnight I have learned that I cannot write his first person POV for _shit_. So, all the stuff I was _going_ to have Chrom do is now going to be a Julian chapter.  
To quoth GRRM, if that last one was a bitch to write, this one was a bitch and a half. It's not even _long_. Still, with the POV problems gone, the next one should be fairly fast.

* * *

"Bollocks."

I grimaced as Kylar very slowly scrambled along the side of the cliff with his claws and gently picked me up in his beak before kicking off and flying back to the top. Oh, wonderful, I drew a crowd of concerned individuals.

"Are you alright?" Robin asked, startled. "What _happened_?"

"I, ah...was practicing new maneuvers and fell off Kylar." I said sheepishly, rubbing Kylar's beak. "Sorry about that."

Robin deflated with a groan. "Gods, we thought you were going to die."

"Well...I didn't. So, there's that." I grinned, walking past him. "Come on, live a little. There's no point to life if you don't!"

Robin managed a small smile and nodded as I wandered back into camp. "Living does seem an important part of life."

Heh, that's kinda funny I guess.

"You're damn right!" I did a little spin back to face him. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go lie down and maybe puke in a bucket!"

Hey, live life to the fullest, but always accept the consequences. That's what I always say.

Never tell anyone anything past the second comma though.

Oh, the cliffs. So, we spend one week digging mass graves and identifying the dead – I'm pretty sure Gangrel isn't getting back up for the spotpass chapters, because quite frankly a hole the size of your fist where your heart is meant to be cannot be healed that easily – and now we slowly march back to the capital, feeling exceedingly depressed for the most part. I guess I understand, I mean Chrom lost his best friend – hell, all of the original shepherds also probably hurt after Vaike's death – and Basilio lost Flavia. Then there's Cameron, who left two days afterwards – hope he's alright – and then there's me.

"What was the point of that?" A confused Phila asked as I walked past. "We explicitly train our pegasus knights to never do that!"

I smirked and paused next to my tent with a grin. "Jumping off of a speeding griffon and hoping he'll catch you is one of life's greatest thrills, ma'am. Now, if you'll excuse me..."

I rolled under the tent flap and flopped down against the bed, groaning. Not my finest moment.

"Didya see that, Gregs?" I chuckled bitterly. "Almost got it that time."

Okay, so maybe I miss him a bit more than I let on. Kylar lay down next to me and rested his beak on my lap.

"You after a pat, bird?"

He just stared at me with huge yellow eyes that were clearly designed to terrify things. They had no right to be that adorable.

I think I understand Cherche's stance that Wyverns are cute better now.

"...well fine." I sighed, patting his beak. Kylar blinked at me in what I hope was contentment, because that's the same way he blinks before eviscerating a sheep.

So I _guess _it's a blink of love. I hope it is.

* * *

"Hey, Old Man." I sighed, not even bothering to open my eyes. "What's up?"

"...you didn't even look around." The crochety old man said in disbelief. "How did you-"

"Kylar's beak was on my lap, and he doesn't wake up and leave. He wakes _me _up whenever he decides it's time to function." I chuckled, opening my eyes and staring out into the void. "So, it's been wreaking havoc on my sleep schedule. What's up?"

Tom stared at me from an armchair, resting his chin on one hand and playing with his beard. "Well...I figured I should tell you this. I brought in another Outsider."

Son of a gun.

"...why the hell would you do that?" I asked in disbelief. "There's no reason to! We have it under control-"

"Not my choice." Tom grunted. "Hubba got this one personally."

...the way he said that was fairly ominous.

"Old Hubba. The perverted man who constantly loses his einherjar-"

"Allow me to rephrase that." Tom said, raising one finger and staring at the nail extending a few centimeters from the tip. "Old Hubba, true name unknown, actually omnipotent being, reality warper, and one of the Divine Pantheon."

What.

"The hell is a Divine Pantheon-"

"The actual gods." Tom waved a hand. "Basically, every god that anyone ever thought could exist, does, and they are part of the Pantheon. Believe it or not, Old Hubba was the last to be created but the first to exist."

"How is that even-" I paused and bit my lip. "...I hate time travel."

Tom nodded. "Old Hubba was created a young man by a dreaming six-year-old as his impression of a traditional abrahamic 'One God'. He went back to the creation of the initial universe – yours, by the way – and started creating every possible universe, thanks to a book he brought back that was written by the assorted different Gods of Knowledge. I'll tell you right now, you do not know true hilarity until you watch multiple different gods and a few Elder Beings argue over whether or not all the information is right. Due to this, he became the one in charge of managing all the universes."

Tom paused for either dramatic effect or running out of breath, I couldn't really tell.

"...long story short, he got a stupidly large workload and recruited a bunch of people from different universes to do his job for him." He sighed. "That's where I come in. Now, Hubba leaves us to our own devices – we decide to pull in Outsiders, which is a system I came up with and is now used by twenty-three other Outrealm Guardians-" He seems a little _too _proud about that "-and so on and so forth. However, sometimes he gets bored with no longer having any work and decides to... well ...interfere."

We stared at each other for a few more seconds before I hazarded a guess.

"He threw a random girl in without telling her about the whole Alternate problem, didn't he."

"Yes." Tom grumbled. "How did you know it was a -"

"It's Old Hubba. The odds of him choosing a male to talk to are incredibly low." I sighed. "...so, what's the problem with that?"

"He decided he didn't like the program and said she's my problem." Tom sighed. "...but he neglected to write down what her Alternate is like, so we're kind of fucked there. I've been looking at her stat sheets, though, and this girl is _tough_. Can't tell if that's before or after alterations, though."

"...so, the alternate is-" I asked slowly. Stat sheets? He has stat sheets on us? Damn, I almost want to see mine.

"-probably worse, yes." He said with a smile.

"Wonderful." I groaned, finding an armchair and falling into it. "Now we've got to deal with _three _superpowered psychos out for our blood."

"Yeah, well..." Tom tried to look for a way to defend himself, before clutching his head in pain. "The hell – oh, what is it you asshole?"

"...what's wrong?" I asked, narrowing my eyes. Who's the asshole, Hubba?

"I've got a call from Cameron on the other line, can't talk any more." Tom said through gritted teeth. "Go...go wake up or something, I dunno. You should need to soon anyway."

With that, he faded away, the blue faded away, and I started falling. I guess he was holding it together?

...I don't wanna fall for all eternity! Wake up wake up wake up-

* * *

-almost time to wake up my ass, it's pitch black out here. Looks like midnight. Well, I could try getting back to sleep, although with this crick in my neck from not sleeping in the bed and a thoroughly pissed-off bird that I must have kneed in the face – beak? - during my scramble to wake up or something demanding walkies – flyies? - in return, it's not that great an idea to try.

I guess I can sleep on Kylar's back on the march, Gregor used to do it all the time when it was the two of us. I'll just make sure he understands to _not_ do any stunts while I'm asleep. Gregor used to bribe him with whole deer. Not that Kylar couldn't go get them himself, but the bird's lazy so Kylar allowed the insult.

"Grram fraggin demigod volunteer interns..." I grumbled sleepily as I stepped outside. Well, there's a few torches lit, and a few grunts from the Feroxi army on guard, but there's no-one else here. Let's see if I can sneak something from the mess tent...

"Skree?"

"Stay here, pal." I sighed. "I'll bring you back a pork leg or something."

Kylar let out a satisfied grunt. Let's walk out of the tent- the heck is that stretching sound?

...is that bird stealing my bed?

Well, fine. Not like I'm gonna sleep tonight. I muttered nonsense to myself and wandered into the mess tent. Let's see, meat, meat, meat, nuts, cheese, some kind of berry, crackers...cheese and crackers. An excellent choice for a midnight snack, if I do say so myself. I grabbed the bag of crackers, a block of cheese, a knife, moved to close the door – A[EWF what the hell?!

"...same idea?" Gaius asked around a mouth of cookie as he slowly put the jar back on top.

"We had cookies up there?" I tilted my head. "...wait, why are those labled Libra?"

"The padre got some from a bunch of villagers a while back." Gaius shrugged. "He wasn't eating them, so I took 'em."

"Did you ask..."

The sudden silence informed me that was a stupid question and I should feel stupid for asking it.

"...of course you didn't." I sighed, sitting down and slicing some cheese. "Well, since you've been caught in the act anyway, care to join me?"

Gaius shrugged and sat on the other side of the table. "Might as well." He sighed. "The usual guys I hang out with are all asleep now. Asleep, dead, or missing."

That was dark.

"Oh, right." I frowned. "It was you, Cameron, Lon'qu, Stahl and Vaike, right?"

"Ricken sat in a few times." Gaius shrugged. "But it was mostly us. Well, Cameron's run off, Vaike's dead, and the other two are asleep."

Gaius shuddered for a second. "I...sewed Vaike's head back together so he'd be in one piece for the burial. Nobody should die like that."

That's incredibly depressing.

"...yeah." I sighed, cutting into the cheese with more strength than strictly necessary. "Gregor's gone, too."

"You two were close?"

"We worked together for a while before joining up with you lot." I shrugged. "Maybe didn't talk after that point as much as we should have, but yeah, pretty close."

Gaius smirked. "Any cool stories?"

"A couple." I grinned, thinking back. "There was this one time a client hired us to deal with a rat problem. We were disappointed, but hey, money's money. So we go in, kill the rats, come out, get our money from the client, leave, then next thing we know there's twenty rats the size of dogs chasing us down the street."

"...how did that happen?" Gaius asked in disbelief. Pff, I don't know either.

"I think the rats we killed were the babies? Anyway, we ran away, Gregor shouting the whole time, then Kylar showed up and started eating them. Only thing is, rats are _covered _in disease, right?" I wiped a tear from my eye. "So, so Kylar's eaten all the rats, and the next morning he walks over to our tent, sticks his head over Gregor's bedroll with him still in it, throws up all over him and leaves. He was perfectly fine once it was out of his system, but Gregor woke up covered in bird vomit with bits of rat bones sticking everywhere."

Gaius started to laugh helplessly. Pal, I'm not even at the climax yet, don't laugh now.

"So, he storms out, climbs into the lake to get clean, then walks out, grabs Kylar, drags him into the lake and proceeds to wrestle with him."

Gaius fell out of the chair, howling with laughter.

"Kylar won. He pinned Gregor underneath one foot and refused to let him back up until I told him. So, anyway, that's why Kylar hates water."

I grinned at the memory, and..pff...fheaeahaha...okay, yeah, now I'm on the floor with Gaius and laughing my head off.

"Oh, that is gold." Gaius chuckled as we finally regained control of ourselves. "That is pure, pure gold."

"I know, right?" I grinned, sitting up. "We were thinking about writing a book or a play, _Adventures in Mercenarydom_."

"There wouldn't be enough interest." Gaius deadpanned as he pulled himself back up.

"Yeah, there probably wouldn't be." I chuckled one last time. "Well, you got any stories?"

Gaius tapped the cookie jar thoughtfully as I finished slicing the cheese. "Well, none with Vaike. He was just sort of there. Although, there was this time he said he'd make it through Ferox without winter gear. He lasted fifteen minutes into the second day before asking Cameron for a coat."

"Pff." I chuckled, spraying bits of cracker everywhere. "Of course. Sounds just like him."

"Yeah, he tried." Gaius shrugged. "He stopped after Maribelle said he'd get frostbite if he kept it up. Said he'd shrug it off, then she politely asked how he intended to fight without fingers."

I can just picture that. I shook the smile off and glanced down at the plate. I need a freakin' drink. "...got any alcohol?"

"Robin's locked it up, and I'm inclined to agree with him." Gaius sighed. "We can't get drunk now. We'll get drunk later. We all saw how Cameron fell apart without alcohol, would have been worse with it."

"Yeah, no kidding" I said darkly. The day Cam starts drinking, hell will freeze over. But hey, it'll be a laugh. "He's got this thing against drinking."

"Whole camp knows." Gaius shrugged. "Well, at least he stuck to his principles. Showed he's not completely lost it."

"Yet." I muttered to myself. "...well, it's been nice Gaius, but I'm gonna go for a wander."

"Sure." Gaius waved me away, biting into another cookie. "I'll just stay here and eat."

"By the way, there's some cupcakes in the cuboard to the left." I said just before leaving. As soon as I had, I heard a brief clattering as he shoved the chair out of the way and a low voice whispering:

"Sugarrr..."

Dear god, he sounds like a bad Scooby Doo villain with that voice and specific words. I'm losing track of my thoughts again.

Not a good sign.

Hello, what's this? Chrom and Cordelia?

...is this the auto-marry convo? Ah, crap, Cameron's gonna be pissed he missed this. Well, I better catch it for him then. Never cared much for the shipping myself, I mean some pairs were cute enough but...that's Cameron's schtick. Well, he's going to want to know how this one goes at least. Let's see if we can follow them quietly.

* * *

I hate hiding in bushes. They're scraggly, and rough, and I think this one has thorns. Oh, god, did I just reference Attack of the Clones in my inner monologue? Why the fuck is Cameron rubbing off on me when he's not even here.

"What was it you wanted to talk to me about, Chrom?"

Oh, hey, it's starting. Better shut up and watch.

"I wanted to thank you for watching out for me back there." Chrom said quietly, grabbing one arm. "If it wasn't for you, Gangrel would have-"

"You'd have found a way to beat him." Cordelia protested, blushing. "I shouldn't have interfered, it was stupid of me-"

"It made us win." Chrom said, flushing. "You shouldn't apologize for that. Besides, you had as much of a right as any of us to kill him."

He's got a fair point, without Emmeryn's death it's wasn't exactly that personal for Chrom and Gangrel, beyond the whole protecting-country-thing.

Maybe. Kinda? I'm trying to figure this out. Oh, crap, they're still talking.

"...I'm just glad you're okay." Cordelia said quietly, gripping her spear. Chrom coughed and looked to the side.

"I am, too."

Awkward silence...

"...that you're okay, not that I'm okay. Well, I'm glad that I'm okay, but-"

Nice going, Casanova. Cordelia giggled a little – god, that sounds weird – and shook her head.

"I understand. Thank you." She straightened up and looked a little upset. "...is that all?"

"Yes." Chrom said, then froze and shook his head. "Wait, no. About that dinner we had..."

I've seen deer in headlights that looked more aware than Cordelia does right now. "...yes?"

"I, ah, know it ended awkwardly." Chrom said quietly. "But I just wasn't sure how to react at the time."

Awkwardly?

"...I...sorry?" Cordelia asked, flushing even deeper. Chrom cleared his throat and took a step forward, grabbing her hand.

"I can tell you this now, Cordelia," He continued, slowly growing more confident. "I should have responded when you kissed me, I shouldn't have left you wondering like that. I love you."

Well then, here it comes.

"Will you marry me?"

And there she goes.

"CORDELIA?!"

Of course she fainted, why wouldn't she. For christ's sake, if she replaces the 'sighs' with fainting I'm going to throw myself off a cliff and tell Kylar not to catch me.

Wow, that's dark.

"I...uh..." Cordelia slowly blinked awake. "...Did you just ask me to-"

"Yes." Chrom smiled. "...should I take that as a 'yes'?"

Cordelia threw her arms around his neck and-Okay, this just got awkwardly passionate. I'm just going to leave.

* * *

"Wake up, Julian" Robin whispered, shaking me. "I need to ask a favor."

"What is it?" I grumbled, stretching. Oh, for christ's sakes, the sun's only just up. That means I only got like three hours of sleep.

"We're almost at the capital." He said nervously, brushing some dust off his shoulder. "It's tradition that someone inspects the bodies of the dead before burial, and I thought that..."

Do I really look like the kind of person that would be comfortable amid dead bodies? Let's not ask that.

"Why me?" I grumbled as I grabbed my coat anyway. "You've got Libra, shouldn't he be doing this?"

"He did the nightly vigil, this is something else. I can ask someone else if you'd like-"  
"No, I'm fine with it." I sighed, falling in behind him. "Let's go look at some dead bodies."  
We walked along the lines of fallen friends, preserved with some weird kind of magic. I suppose there's always going to be everyday applications for stuff like that. Not that I'd call this everyday.

Vaike's head was covered with a black shroud, Flavia was in her full battle armor, Gregor had a pair of coins over his eyes, and Anna...Anna's right eye was stiched up, and the arrow that had killed her was in her right hand. I don't know why they kept it – wait.

I knelt down and scraped my hand along the fletching, wiping away something from the feathers. Soot?

"...what's wrong?" Robin asked me. "You've gone all pale..."

"Robin, I spent a lot of time in Plegia doing merc work, and something I can tell you is that they always used black fletching from a specific bird that was easy to find." I said shakily. "...but if that's the case, why is this one white?"

It can't be blind chance of someone having a white-fletched arrow, they wouldn't have covered it in soot if that was the case. But who the hell would benefit from making us think Plegia had killed her?

* * *

A/N: Dear lambentLodestar: This update would have arrived faster outside of the aforementioned issues if I didn't have a girlfriend starving for attention. Gimme a break.  
Bonus for waiting so long: 100 word alt-POV thing.

* * *

Kylar's POV of a battle.  
Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree SKREE Skree Skree Skree Skree SKREE Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree SKREE Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree Skree SKREE!


	34. Chapter Thirty-Three (Mal I)

**ASLEEP**

**Chapter Thirty-Three – You Wouldn't Steal a Car**

* * *

"_In case of giant genocidal demon-dragon with horde of undead, break glass."_

_For years, I thought my dad was kidding when he pointed out that bookcase to me. He made it very clear I wasn't to open it, so I didn't. Not like I had the time to, not while I was helping Mum out around the shop._

_Then the aforementioned thing happened. I don't know why, but, well, it fit the criteria and I was curious, so I broke the glass._

_Honestly, after reading the book and letters he'd put in there, I started wondering what the hell I'd just gotten myself into. There was a map, with markings all over the world – little red pins with names scrawled on them. Cynthia, Severa, Inigo...but this bookcase hadn't been opened in years. How did he know their names?_

_I started to read more carefully. He insisted that I'd be able to find them where the pins were. It's kind of disgusting really – he'd put so much planning and forethought into this. But...he made it so clear._

_He knew he was going to die. He knew Mum was going to die. He knew that there was jack shit he could do about it. So he gave me as many resources as he could to make sure I could help Lucina stop this bullshit when we went back in time. _

_The next morning Lucien arrived to take the notes. I-_

"Mal, wake up."

Ughub? Not now, I'm reminiscing!

"Mal, seriously, get up."

Don't wanna – OW! Hello, floor. Okay, check – not much rocking, so calm waters. Not moving very quickly, so not much wind – or we've set anchor. Or crashed. Right, ship assessment done. Room assessment – some asshole shoved me off the bed.

"Brady..." I growled, slowly standing up and glaring at him "...what the hell?"

"We've got a problem." The healer said sharply. "Come on, you're needed up top."

I slowly blink around the dark room – still nighttime, then – before sighing. "I swear to Naga, if Inigo's crashed my ship I'm killing him."

* * *

Well, it's not that, thankfully. This is still an issue, though. "That's a lot of ships." I said casually as another wave rocked us. "They seen us yet?"

"Not yet." Gerome said quietly, rubbing Minerva's nose. "But they might."

Frowning, I took the wheel from a yawning Inigo. "Better not give them any reason to, then."

Downside of open water: There's no rock formations or the like to hide behind when necessary. All that's out there, for a few miles, is that one small island with a castle on top – and it's surrounded by ships. Not valmese, otherwise they'd be flying their flag all over the place. They're probably pirates.

"We could take them." Severa offered, making Laurent glance at her in what is either surprise or shock.

"Are you kidding?" He said incredulously. "There are ten ships, we have one. They most likely have bigger crews, as well."

"Ship to ship weapons." I muttered, straining my eyes. "See that line along the hull where there's no paint? There's probably hatches containing ballista there, and they didn't want to paint them shut."

Noire slowly glanced over, shivering. "H-he's right, I can see the ridges."

Why she ever wanted to become a mage like her mum with eyes like those, I'll never understand. Against a ship like the Serenity, one ballista shot will completely scuttle us – not that they'd want to. They'd want to board us, but if the cost in manpower gets too high they might use them. Oh, my life for Valmese or Plegian war barges – way too low to support any ship-to-ship weapons. Carry a load of troops, but Serenity can outrun something that large and bulky.

My god I love this ship.

"...they've spotted us." Noire said, ramrod straight. Inigo blinked out over the waves and nodded in agreement.

"Yes, they have. Well that's..."

"Irritating?" I offered, twisting the wheel around. "Brady, Gerome, get us to full sail. Laurent, once we're at it use your damn wind tome to get us out of here."

Laurent frowned but pulled out his elwind tome anyway as Gerome and Brady dashed past us to start pulling on the required ropes. "Well, I think I've got it down, but the risk of us tearing a sail is still fairly high -"

"Laurent, there's practically no wind and they have oars. We don't." I said through gritted teeth as Serenity slowly turned around. "I'll take a chance that the sails will rip, it's either that or they catch up to us."

"Two of them are following us." Severa said, smirking. "Let's see if they can catch us."

"Only two?" Oh, thank god. "Okay, we might be able to deal with them then. I'd rather we didn't need to, though."

"Understandable." Laurent nodded. With a massive 'wham' sound the sails unfurled and slapped against the masts, and the bespectacled genius can start his work – now, if you please.

Good, we're picking up speed already. Please don't let the sails rip.

"Noire, get your bow. If they get near us, I want you to snipe whoever's steering them." I growled, yanking the wheel to the side and pointing us in the direction of north – away from the pirate base, but also away from where Cynthia and Owain are meant to be. Dammit. Sorry, Dad, wasn't expecting this – and in my defense, neither did you. As long as they don't move or get killed, we can pick them up later.

Looks like we're going to go pick up Kjelle, then. That's the direction we're going in anyway, so we might as well. Frig.

* * *

"...these are the most dogged pirates I have ever met." I said in astonishment. It's been almost a day, and they're still following us? Laurent almost collapsed from exhaustion a few hours ago, but the lead we've got is quickly being reduced. We might have to fight after all – they're still pretty far off, though. The wind's blowing in the wrong damn direction, though, so they're gaining on us faster than I'd like.

"Must be starvin'." Brady said with a frown. "I don't think Walhart would look too kindly on people lootin' his farms. He kinda needs those to feed his army."  
Don't you just hate practical dictators? Clever bastard. If this was some traditional tyrant, he wouldn't give two fucks about his people – and he doesn't – but no, we get one that understands logistics. Or maybe he just really likes his freshly-grown vegetables, I don't know.

"...which means we might be the first easy prey in weeks." I sighed, slamming my head against the wheel. I'm not cut out for this battle leadership thing. Where's Lucina when you need her? "...looks like we need to prep for a fight. Go check on Laurent."

"Gotcha, boss." Brady nodded before running off. This is...this is just great.

"...uh, Mal?"

What is it, Noire? I craned my head upwards to see the archer dangling half-out of the crow's nest.

"Please tell me you're not stuck..." I groaned. "...again."

"I'm not!" Noire protested. "It's just...um..."

She pointed off into the distance towards the north. Groaning, I slowly followed her finger and – oh, fuck me.

That...is a lot of ships. They're not heading towards Ylisse, they're heading the way we came – probably to deal with the pirates. And we are stuck in the middle. Naturally.

"Okay, everyone, fuck battle positions. Hold no tight, we're doing something weird."

Severa opened her mouth to protest, but I'd already yanked the wheel to the right and started a slow but sharp turn back to the two pirate ships, which were also turning around. Probably for the same reason.

Now, we _could _pretend to be on Valm's side, since no descriptions of our crew could have gotten out (This type of ship is way too common anyway, it's not like we're flying the flag of Ylisse, I'm not suicidal) but to do that we'd have to get rid of Severa, because if they found someone with the Mark on her body we'd be fucked. Let's see...options. Ah, perfect. "Severa, you're going to hate me for this."

* * *

Well, I was right. That was a painful plan to explain, but hey she went along with it. After hitting me, of course. I'll be honest, it sucks that we can't rely on her for this fight, but we all have to make sacrifices sometimes. I'm sure we can handle a pair of starving pirate ships. Gerome took off a second ago, so that leaves me, Brady, Inigo, Noire and a half-functioning Laurent who's holding back until he needs to on deck.

My personal favorite feature of this ship? Ramming prong. Now, ramming prong plus maneouverability plus wind in your sails plus being a class of ship known for being very, very, very fast equals...?

We tore through the first pirate ship side-on with a satisfying _**KRUNCHK **_noise, ripping it in half. It quickly started sinking as panicking pirates dived into the ocean or grabbed onto floating barrels to avoid getting hit by falling debris. Gods, that's never going to not be satisfying. Unfortunately, the second ship, not wanting to be the second one like that, turned and met us side-to-side, tossing grappling hooks and linking the two of us. Welp, prepare for battle.

"...I immediately regret listening to you." Inigo sighed as he drew his killing edge and straightened his armor. "We're going to die."

We left Noire up in the crow's nest because quite frankly she'd get in the way on the ground, Laurent was kept back because he's not doing so great, so it's just me and Brady.

"Please." I scoffed, kicking open the weapon drawer next to the mast and retrieving my spear. "They'd need to get past me first."

Where is the blasted thing? How does it always sink to the bottom – ah, there it is!  
I fix my father's shield to my left arm and smirk to myself. Poor bastards won't know what hit them. "I'll take front. Brady, you heal us with a physic staff if necessary. Inigo, watch my back."

The pirates suddenly heaved on their grappling hooks and the ships slammed together, almost knocking us over.

The pirates dropped their boarding ramp and started making their way over, one at a time, knifes held in their teeth and axes in their hands.  
"Can you get any more archaic?" I scoffed, climbing onto the ramp and walking to the midpoint. Okay, let's be careful. This means they can't flank me, but I could get shoved into the water – I can swim, of course, I'd be a shitty captain if I couldn't, but it'd remove me from the fight and I'd be a sitting-gah!

Noire, while I appreciate the covering fire, could you maybe not almost hit me with the next one? Oh, right, I'm in a fight. D'hoy, focus – focus! I hate fighting axemen, they're always so annoying. Wow, these guys really do not look like they're at the top of their game. First one, shove off the side with shield. Alright, now present shield and stab with spear, forcing them back until one gets fed up and rushes me – a_ha!_ A sweep of the spear now that they're inside its reach sends the two of them falling off the side with a scream. The next two go down with arrows in their eyes or throats – thanks, Noire – and now there's only four left. Wait, and the three trying to climb onto Serenity now that I've knocked them off.

"INIGO, DEAL WITH THEM!"

Sod it, let's finish this. Lunge, knock down the first one, stab him in the throat. Pull out spear, spin it in a circle to force the others to back off while I reset my stance. Okay, I've got one behind me but Noire should be able to tag him, let's deal with these two.  
One dropped his axe for a sword and ducked under my spear, slashing at my shield. If you're going to try and break it, mate, it's not going to work. Allow me to introduce it to your ugly face, making it even more ugly. Now back off-

"I'll gut ya you brat!"

"Your voice could do with some improvement." I snarked, ramming my spear into the guy's throat. "Unfortunately, I'm not so great at surgery."

Pull out – huh, the tip's broken off. Well, crap, and there's one left too...Noire must have gotten the one behind me or I'd be dead by now.  
The guy I hit in the face with my shield staggered up and glared at me.

"Insolent son of a -"

"Can we just get to the part where I kill you?" I asked with a shrug. The pirate actually paused for a second, twitched a few times, then charged screaming incoherently at me.

"...I'll take that as a yes."

I stepped to the side, stuck out my foot, and watched as he tumbled into the water – hitting his head on the way down. He's...not coming back up, is he?  
Nope. There aren't any air bubbles, he's dead. Or a really good actor. Right, well, that's one – okay, technically two – problems dealt with. Now for the third...through one hundred. That's a large fleet.

* * *

"Drop your weapons, Inigo." I said quietly as the valmese ships drew next to us. "If we provoke them we die."

Inigo sighed but sheathed his sword and placed it back in the weapons locker as the Valmese dropped a boarding ramp and one extremely...good-looking woman walked towards us.

"My name is General Pheros of the Valmese army." She said quietly. Oh, thank Naga, we've lucked out and gotten the decent human being. "Who are you, and what are your intentions?"

Time to try and be as crude-yet-obviously-trustworthy-as-possible. "My name is Malcom, ma'am. My mother gave me enough cash to go and buy a boat for her buisness."

"What buisness-" The general started, before glancing at my hair and sighing. "...your mother's an Anna, isn't she?"

"One of the best." I said proudly. "Thanks for showing up, we were worried that we'd get overwhelmed."

"You appeared to handle it." The general waved her hand forward, as a small contingent walked onto the ship. Please don't start attacking.

"Only because you demoralized the bastards." I shrugged. "We sailed past their base by accident, and they kind of started chasing us."

Pheros' eyes widened and she closed her hand, bringing her men to a hault. "You know the location of their base?"

"...yes." I said slowly. "That's why we're running."

Pheros smiled slightly. "I have a proposition for you. Lead us to this base, and you shall continue on your way. If you do not...well, we could always use another ship."

So either work for Valm temporarily or permanently. Fine.

"Sounds like a deal, ma'am." I said, making a big show of being regretfull. "Not a situation I'd like to end up in, but not much of a choice."

Pheros nodded. "Of course, we're going to have to search your ship, to make sure you're not hiding anything contrary to Walhart's orders."

Please, Severa, please don't let your pride get in the way of this happening. I made a big show of grumbling before sitting down and glaring at the searching soldiers – thank the gods that Gerome had taken Minerva out for a flight in the other direction a few days before we met the pirate base, agreeing to meet up with us at the same island within a week.

So we're already a day late. Damn pirates.

"General, we've found a locked room!"

Pheros glanced at me with a frown. "Hiding something?"

Ah, okay, Severa I am begging you not to mess this up. "No, ma'am." I 'stuttered', standing up. "I'll just, ah, unlock it for you shall I?"

I walked up to the door of my cabin and slotted the key in, taking an over-exaggerated breath for both dramatic purposes and to calm myself down, before I unlocked the door and – as part of the conditions – closed my eyes.

"Maaal, who are these people?"

Oh thank god she's rolling with it. I turned to face the blushing soldier and a surprised Pheros with a cough.

"Sorry, I should have warned you that I had, ah, company."

"Yes..." Pheros said weakly. "...yes, well, ah, sorry for disturbing you ma'am."

"Don't worry." Severa said from behind me – DO NOT LOOK – and judging by the creaking she's stretching. "Just tell me when Mal can come back to bed."  
Pheros and the soldier glanced at each other.

"...well, everything appears to be in order." Pheros said after a second. "Remember, lead us to the base or-"

"I know, general. I get it." I said with a small smile. "Thank you for understanding." I stepped inside my cabin, shut the door, locked it, counted to twenty and made sure they weren't in earshot.

"We're good." I sighed, closing my eyes and turning around. "How did you manage to nail the brainless thing so well?"

"I copied that girl Inigo hit on that one time." Severa said with what sounded like a shrug. Huh.

"It kind of suited you." Oh, mouth, why did you have to start working before my brain?

"You JERK!"

Did she throw a pillow at me?

OW! Hey, that was my lamp!

"Severa, if they caught on that you were a-"

"OH, SURE, THAT'S YOUR REASONING!" Severa snapped. "Now HOLD STILL!"

I opened my eyes and – um. I...wasn't aware she even owned something that lacy. Severa's face reddened and she grabbed a nearby silver plate before tossing it at my head.

"AND NOW YOU'RE LOOKING?!"

Yep, another successful plan – ow.

* * *

A/N: Well, I'm off at Otakuthon from Friday to Sunday, then start college again on Wednsday, so the next update WILL take time. Not much else to say, really.

Although with my daily two bus rides back, I'll finally be able to update Fool of Fools again. That's always good.


End file.
